nowhere (17 page)

“Whatjadoing?” she asked, slurring her words. 

“I was looking for Coach. I thought he might be in here.” I needed to come up with an excuse to get out of here. “I better go check his office again. I bet he’s in there, studying the playbook.”

“It’s the weekend. He’s probably at home.”

“In any case, I gotta run. See you later.” I turned to leave. Liz grabbed my arm, scratching me, and leaving a bright red line on my skin. 

“Damn it, Liz. You ought to cut those nails.” I rubbed at my arm, but it didn’t do any good. The scratch was still there.

“Sorry. I just thought that since we’re both here…” She casually shifted her body. I took a step backward to move away from her, not realizing until it was too late that I’d put myself in an even worse situation. Now I was standing in the entrance of the secret make-out corner. “We should make the most of it.”

I froze. I didn’t want any trouble. I couldn’t believe that she was still coming on to me. Sternly, I reminded her, “Liz, I have a girlfriend. And Tyler, remember him? Your boyfriend?

“Yeah, but who cares about all that?” She waved her hand in the air wildly.  “It was you and me long before them.”

“No, it wasn’t.” I was still kicking myself for hooking up with her that one time. It was time I set her straight. “We were never an item. And we are never going to be.” I turned quickly to walk away, avoiding her grasp this time.

“Whatever, Doonbug.” She ran around me and stopped, blocking my path. “Just shut up and fuck me.” She reached up and kissed me hard on the mouth. I didn’t kiss her back. I felt sick to my stomach. The only lips I ever wanted on mine were Mikayla’s.

“Leave me alone, Liz. I’m not interested.” I pushed her away and took a giant step back.

“You’re an asshole,” she shouted. Liz didn’t like to be told no. Her angry eyes flashed. She stepped forward and lifted her hand to slap me, but I caught her wrist before she could.

“You’re not going to leave another mark on me.” I waited until she’d calmed down, “Are you going to behave?” She nodded and I finally let go of her wrist.

Suddenly I sensed an audience. I turned around. Her cheerleading friends, including Emma, had stopped short at the gym door. I wondered how much they saw. By the look on their faces, they’d seen plenty.
Great. How was I going to explain all of this to Mikayla, especially when she didn’t even want to see me?

Mike

“Ugh,” I groaned as I slowly made my way downstairs early Monday morning, leaning heavily on the railing for support. It was the first time since getting sick that I’d left my room. I’d spent all day Sunday either passed out in bed or retching into the toilet. I still felt like hell, but I hoped forcing myself to move around would make me feel better.

“How you feeling?” Pops got up from his chair and came to the bottom of the stairs. He held his hand to me and I gladly took it. He helped me down the last couple of steps.

“A little better...I guess,” I answered, trying to sound like I meant it. I didn’t want Pops to worry about me.

“You still look pale,” he grumbled.

“Thanks.” I gave him my best attempt at a dirty look.

“Come sit down.” He led me into the kitchen and pulled out my chair. He looked so concerned, I almost felt guilty. “I’ll make you some plain toast. That should be okay for your stomach.” It felt strange having Pops fix me something to eat. I was the one who normally took care of him.

“Thanks. I am hungry.” I hadn’t eaten anything since the ice-cream cone on Saturday night, which I threw up. My stomach was empty, but it still hurt; I kept my arm wrapped around my middle.

Pops placed two pieces of dry toast and a small glass of ginger ale in front of me. I took small tentative bites, hoping my stomach wouldn’t retaliate.

“You look thin,” he commented.

“It’s this new diet I’m on. It’s called the flu.”

“Maybe you are feeling better,” he snorted. “I missed your witty comebacks yesterday. It’s been too quiet around here.” He gave me an encouraging smile.

“Where is everybody?” I asked, looking around the deserted kitchen. More often than not it was just Pops and me. I’d begun to prefer it that way. However, I thought my mom might stick around today to see how I was feeling. I couldn’t keep my disappointment from showing.

“Your mom had an early morning meeting. She wanted to be here when you got up, but she didn’t think you’d be awake this early. I insisted that if you did wake up, I’d take good care of you. So what do you think? How am I doing?”

I smiled. “You’re doing great. Best toast I’ve ever had.” I pushed my almost empty plate away.

“Glad you liked it.”

“Is Emma around?” I wanted to know what happened Saturday night after James and I left. What had Tyler meant when he said that hitting girls was a common practice in James’ neighborhood?

Pops shook his head. “No, that girl comes and goes. She must think there’s a revolving door on this old farmhouse. Why, I’ve barely seen her since the three of you arrived. She’s always running off with her new friends. When she is here, she’s either jumping around practicing cheers trying to make this old house fall down, or yapping on that phone of hers.” 

I laughed, forgetting how much my stomach hurt. “Ouch.” I wrapped my arm around my middle even tighter.

“What’s wrong?” asked Pops, clearly alarmed by my reaction.

“Nothing.” I tried to act natural, but it was proving to be more and more difficult.

“Are you okay? Maybe this is more than the flu.” His forehead creased in concern.

“I’ll be fine. Laughing hurt, that’s all.” Pops still looked worried. I’d have to be more convincing. “Do you have more chores for me to do?” I teased.

“Maybe,” he answered gruffly. “But for now, why don’t you go sit on the front porch and get some fresh air. You’ll be able to see what else needs to be done around here. The last idea you had, about painting a new sign for the vegetable stand, was a good one. I’ve been meaning to tell you that it’s gotten a lot of compliments. Everyone’s said how it really grabs their attention when they drive by.  Thank you.” He smiled proudly.

“You’re welcome.”

I made it out onto the porch on my own, refusing help. I wanted to put his fears to rest. I smiled and waved at him as I sat down gingerly on the swing. He stood at the door, watching me, for a full minute. My smile never wavered.

“See Pops, I’m fine.”

“Humph,” he muttered, walking away. He returned a minute later with my phone. 

“Here. Your phone rang a thousand times yesterday, if it rang once. Take care of it, would you?” he grouched, attempting to appear tough. If he’d actually been upset, he would’ve simply shoved it in a drawer until the battery died. The truth was he was turning into an old softie and he didn’t want anyone to know.

“Thanks. I promise to take better care of it,” I said, playing along.

“I’ll be in the house if you need anything.”

“Okay.” I nodded. 

I checked my phone to see what calls I missed. The first thing I noticed was that James hadn’t called even once to see how I was feeling. Paige, however, had called ten times, leaving three messages, each one sounding more urgent than the last. 

It was only 7 a.m. in San Francisco, but I called Paige anyway. “Hi, Paige. What’s up? Is everything okay?”

“Where the hell have you been? I tried to reach you all day yesterday.”

“Sorry, I was sick,” I answered weakly. I wasn’t feeling very good at the moment. My stomach was cramping. 
Maybe the toast wasn’t such a good idea after all.
 

“Oh, sorry,” she said sheepishly. “Are you feeling better today?”

“No, not really.” My free arm was still wrapped tightly around my middle.

“What’s the matter?”

“I think I have the flu,” I moaned. I wanted to tell her what happened at Blondie’s, but I was too sick to get the words out. My stomach felt like it was being stabbed with a sharp knife.

“Shit. Mike, that’s bad. And now I feel even worse, because I have bad news of my own.  That’s why I’ve been trying to call you...I....I...”

“Whatever it is, hurry up and spit it out, before I puke.” I wiped the sweat off my forehead with the back of my hand. 

“Promise you won’t hate me?”

I didn’t have time for this. “Of course I won’t hate you. But stop stalling and just tell me. Pops won’t like it if his front porch is covered in my breakfast.”

“Okay, okay.” She took a deep breath and continued all at once. “I’m so sorry, but I can’t come to see you like we planned. I know it’s short notice. But after we spoke, I crashed the front end of my parents’ car. I was backing out of the driveway, looking behind me to make sure I wasn’t going to run anyone over, when I turned my wheel too sharply. I clipped the mailbox with the front of the car. My parents are making me use the money from my plane ticket to pay for the repairs. You wouldn’t believe the damage—the whole front bumper’s torn off.”

I laughed, remembering too late how much it hurt.

“It’s not funny,” she yelled.

“Yes, it is. Only you could destroy the front of the car while backing up.” 

“I miss you,” she admitted. 

“I miss you too.”

“I’m so depressed that I won’t be there for your eighteenth birthday. That’s the day I was supposed to arrive. I’m really sorry I screwed up.” 

“It’s okay. You’ll have to save up your money and come to visit me another time. Maybe you can come for a few days over Christmas break and experience real snow.”

“Yeah, that sounds like fun. You promise you’re not mad?”

“I promise. But I do have to go.”

Two seconds after I hung up, I was leaning over the railing, puking up the toast along with a lot of disgusting green bile.

Feeling a little better, I sat back down on the swing. With the pain in my stomach temporarily gone, the wheels in my brain started to turn.
Why hadn’t James called me? Was he upset with me because Tyler made a stupid comment that I hadn’t even understood? Was he planning on breaking up with me?
I thought about how he wasn’t himself after we returned from Blondie’s that night. He was distant and broody. My temperature rose, as I grew angrier by the minute. Suddenly I stood up. I couldn’t just sit here. I had to do something before I lost James for good.

Dooner

I was in the locker room changing after practice when suddenly there was a lot of commotion. From around the corner someone shouted angrily, “Hey, can’t you read, this is the guys’ locker room.”

“No wait, she’s here to see me,” another voice answered. “This hot little number’s going to suck my cock, huh sweetie?” That caused all the guys to shout and whistle.
What the hell’s going on?
I quickly pulled my shorts on.

“Not a chance in Hell, you’ve got nothing there,” a female voice said, laughing.  I’d recognize that voice anywhere.
What’s she doing here?
The room instantly filled with loud cheers.
This isn’t going to end well.

“Hold on, bitch. It’ll only take a second. I just got out of the cold shower. I wasn’t expecting you...so soon,” he said. My heart pounded as I rushed over. What was Mikayla thinking, walking into a locker room filled with half-naked testosterone-ridden football players? I had to get her out of here before there was trouble.

I stopped when I saw her standing there with her hands on her hips and her crazy hair fanning out all around her.
Damn, she’s beautiful
. 

Tyler arrived at the same moment I did, looking like he shared some of my anxiety at her being here. “What the hell, Mike,” he said, wrapping his towel tightly around his waist. “You can’t just come barging in here.”

“Really?  Because it looks like I just did,” she said, fire behind her eyes.
What is this all about?

“Well, you have to get out. Now!” He tried to maneuver her back toward the door.  I felt my anger build. He’d better not even think about shoving her again. I’d lose it this time if he so much as laid a finger on her. I took a step toward them.

Without warning, Tyler’s towel loosened and fell to the ground before he could catch it. “Damn it, Mikayla,” he shouted over the loud laughter that erupted all around. His face was beet red. “Out.” He bent over to pick up his towel and wrapped it around his waist again. 

“Please, like I haven’t seen it before.” She shrugged, making Tyler furious. “I’m not leaving here until I’ve said what I’ve come here to say.” She stood her ground.

Tyler sighed. “This is not the place.” For once I agreed with him.

The locker room had grown silent. All the guys were standing around, watching and waiting to see what would happen next. 

“Just shut up, Tyler, and listen,” she shouted, taking a step closer to him. “Don’t you ever put your hands on me again.” She took another step closer. Her eyes were dark; you could barely make out her pupils. “And don’t interfere in my relationship with James.” She paused before adding, “You got that?”

“Yeah, loud and clear,” he muttered, sounding like a scolded child. If the scene hadn’t been so personal, I might have enjoyed witnessing Tyler humbled. “Finished?”

“Almost. I also came to talk to you,” she said, acknowledging me for the first time. The team also shifted their focus. I braced myself for what she had to say.

Her eyes were still dark, but I detected a hint of sadness in them. “What kind of boyfriend are you?” she questioned. She continued without letting me answer. “You let this giant oaf scare you away?” She nodded at Tyler, and several guys snickered. “And worse, I told you I was sick and you didn’t even call me once to see how I was feeling. Some boyfriend you turned out to be. Ugh,” she groaned, dropping her hands from her hips and wrapping her arms around her middle. Without another word, she spun on her heel and left. I stood there in shock.

As soon as the show was over, the noise in the locker room increased, everyone buzzing about what just happened. Finally, I snapped out of it.

I took off after her wearing only my shorts. “Mikayla,” I yelled, looking all around.  Where could she have gone? Why did she disappear like that?
She didn’t even let me explain.