Obsession (7 page)

Abe raised an eyebrow. “A soda? Some juice?” He grinned. “I won't even ask about coffee.”

Toni realized then that she had not responded to his offer to get her something from the store. How could she talk to him so comfortably and unreservedly over cinnamon rolls or while riding in the car, but the minute there was nothing to distract them and his eyes locked into hers, she suddenly turned into an insecure schoolgirl who could scarcely remember her own name?

She cleared her throat. “Juice would be fine.”

He seemed to be waiting for something more. “Any particular kind? Or would you like to come in and pick it out yourself?”

“I… I'll come in,” she said, grabbing her sunglasses from her purse and reaching for the door as she suddenly recognized her need for fresh air. Putting on the glasses, she breathed deeply as they weaved their way through a half-dozen parked vehicles and a small group of raucous teenagers standing in a circle just outside the store. As Abe held the squeaky screen door open and Toni stepped inside, the smell of popcorn assailed her nostrils. It was cool and slightly dark in the rundown wooden building, but the aisles were freshly swept and the shelves neat and in order. Toni had been here often, particularly when she was young. Everything about it—especially the popcorn smell—reminded her of her father. For as long as she could remember, her dad had never been able to hold out against her pleading for a bag of popcorn every time they walked through the door of this little store, even though he made quite a pretense of trying to do so. Now she was reminded, as she had been so many times since her mother's death twelve years earlier, how something as simple as the smell of popcorn could precipitate an entire new level of pain. Fighting tears, she was glad for the sunglasses that perched on her nose.

Anxious to put some distance between herself and Abe, she turned away from him and walked hurriedly toward the back of the store,
where she knew she would find the refrigerated section that contained the cold drinks. As she pulled open the door and reached in to grab a plastic bottle of apple juice, she heard her name.

“Toni? Toni Matthews? Is that you, child?”

She knew the voice even before she turned around. “Maude,” she said, transferring the juice to her left hand and reaching out with her right to greet the tall, stocky woman with the short, unkempt gray hair and the wrinkled white apron wrapped around her ample middle. “Maude Olson. I can't believe it. Don't tell me you and Simon are still running this place!”

Maude ignored Toni's outstretched hand and wrapped her in a bear hug, thumping her on the back as she talked. “Course we're still runnin' this place. What'd you think, we retired or somethin'? ‘Sides, who else'd be fool enough to do it?” She let Toni go and stepped back to look at her. “My, my, you're just as purty as your mama, even though you don't look a lick like her. Who'd ever a-thought such a homely, skinny kid would turn out so purty!” She laughed. “I used to worry ‘bout you when your mama and daddy first brought you up here. I told your mama, I said, ‘You gotta start feedin' this child more. She's just too skinny.’ Why, it's been years since I seen you up in these parts. Guess you was just too busy to come see us in the middle of all that fancy schoolin'. And you're still a might on the thin side. But I gotta admit, you look real good.”

“She sure does,” Abe agreed, coming up to the two women, “although you may be right about the skinny part.” He flashed a smile at Toni.

“And just who might this be?” asked Maude, eyeing Abe suspiciously. She turned back to Toni. “Is this that lawyer fella I heard you was marryin', the one your little sister, Melissa, told me ‘bout?” Before Toni or Abe could answer, she went on. “Now
there's
a girl that knows fishin'. Course, she's kinda skinny too, but a real sweetheart, that one. And, boy, does she favor her mama—in looks, that is. But it's her daddy she favors when it comes to just about everything else. Why, she's just like his little shadow.”

Her voice trailed off and her smile faded, as the memory of Paul Matthews's death, right there at Eagle Lake, registered on her face. “Oh, honey, I'm so sorry,” she said, enveloping Toni in another hug. “Here I am just runnin' on, and you grievin' like you are. I'm so, so sorry. When am I gonna learn to keep my big mouth shut?”

Toni swallowed the lump in her throat. “It's OK, Maude,” she assured the woman, pulling away from her embrace and thinking again how grateful she was that she was wearing sunglasses. Ignoring the ringing that had started in her ears, she nodded her head for emphasis. “I'm OK. Really.”

Maude pursed her lips and fixed her eyes on Toni. “First you lose your mama, then your daddy. How can you be OK?” She shook her head. “Nope. I don't believe it. Takes time to grieve, honey, and you ain't had ‘nough time. 'Sides, even if you think you're OK, how 'bout your little sister? Why, that girl was always taggin' along after her daddy, followin' him ever'where. You tryin' to tell me she's OK? I 'magine she's hurtin' somethin' awful.”

The ringing was growing louder, and Toni could feel herself slipping over the edge. She should never have come here, should never have exposed herself to questions she just wasn't ready to answer and to memories too painful to confront. If only she'd stayed in the car, but she hadn't, and now she was closer to the edge than she had allowed herself to get since her father's death. She was slipping, and there was nothing she could do to stop the fall.

Abe's strong arm around her waist pulled her back. She leaned against him gratefully, hiding behind her sunglasses as she heard Abe thank Maude for her concern and explain that they had to be on their way. Handing her a five-dollar bill to cover their drinks and telling her to keep the change, with his arm still around Toni's waist, he steered her toward the front door, past two older men examining fishing lures and a mother and child arguing over which cookies to buy. The ringing in her ears was fading, and she heard Maude call goodbye as they stepped outside into the bright sunshine.

“Thank you,” she said as they made their way to the car. “I know Maude meant well, but…”

“But her timing wasn't the best.” Abe unlocked her door and held it for her while she climbed in, then went around to the driver's side and got in beside her. “Maybe mine wasn't either,” he added, looking into her eyes. Toni had slid her sunglasses off when she got into the car. Realizing that had been a mistake, she looked down at the juice bottle in her hand.

“I shouldn't have asked you to come with me,” she heard him say. “I didn't realize this place was so full of memories for you. I'm sorry.”

She shook her head and forced herself to look back up at him. “No. It's not your fault. I should have realized… I should have known… but… I'm all right now.”

“Are you sure?”

“I'm sure.” She held her gaze steady as long as she could. Then, opening her bottle, she took a sip. The cold apple taste was refreshing, and the drink was a good diversion. “Thank you for the juice.”

He didn't answer. When she dared to look back at him, she was sure she saw a hint of tears in his eyes. “I really am sorry. I've been so caught up with the detective end of all this stuff—wanting to help you find out what happened to your dad, if there was any connection to this Julie Greene case—that I forgot how fresh all this is for you, and how painful. Forgive me.”

The sincerity in his eyes was almost more than she could resist. With everything in her, she wanted to crumple into his arms and let him hold her while she cried, but her mind recoiled at the idea, not just because she knew she had no business in the arms of this man she hardly knew, particularly when she was already engaged to someone else, but also because she was afraid that, if she ever allowed herself to cry—really cry, not just shed a couple of tears—she might never be able to stop. Over and above all that, she had no intention of giving this man any more opportunities to see how emotionally vulnerable she was. Toni had always prided herself on being strong and able to
stand up under pressure; she was appalled at how little of that strength she had exhibited lately. Taking a deep breath, she forced a smile. “Thank you for your concern. I really am OK now. Shall we… walk around the lake a little? Look around? Do some ‘preliminary sleuthing,’ whatever that entails?”

He returned her smile, but it wasn't very convincing. “Sure, partner. If you're up to it. Let's go walk around and see what we can find.”

Toni couldn't decide if she was more disappointed in herself or in the fact that they hadn't found out anything new about her father's death. Although the remainder of the afternoon had been a pleasant one as they hiked the beaches and campgrounds surrounding Eagle Lake, and talked to the many fishermen and campers they came across, only one old man remembered having been there the day Paul Matthews died, and he couldn't recall having seen or talked with him. “Of course, my eyes ain't what they used to be,” he had told them. “I may have seen a boat or two out on the lake that day, but I couldn't tell you who was in 'em. I fish mostly from the bank myself. Don't care much for boats.” They had even gone by the cabin where Paul Matthews had stayed during his time at the lake, but they couldn't look inside because someone had rented it for the weekend. “Besides,” Toni had explained to Abe, “Brad came up here after Dad's… death… and packed up his stuff and brought it home. There wouldn't be any sense in looking inside now.”

Before leaving the lake, Toni had wrestled with the idea of going back to the store and asking Maude if either she or Simon had seen or talked to her dad the day of his heart attack, but by the time she worked up the courage to do so, the elderly proprietors had closed up shop and gone home for the day. “They tend to keep their own schedule,” she explained to Abe. “They're always here early in the morning during fishing season, but they go home when they feel like it. If you
need a quart of milk after that, you just have to drive down the road a few miles.” Abe had smiled, saying it sounded like a nice, simple way of life.

Then they had gotten back into the car and headed for home. Toni was emotionally drained and spent most of the return trip staring out the window at the breathtaking grandeur that so many Washingtonians take for granted. The majestic firs towered above them on either side of the road, topped by a sky so blue it seemed unreal, a canvas painted by a master artist.
And so it is,
she reminded herself.
A world created by the Master himself, with so much beauty, and yet…

“Hungry?” Abe asked, interrupting her reverie.

She turned toward him as he glanced over at her and smiled. She shook her head. “Not really. Just tired.”

“Disappointed?” He was looking straight ahead now, but his jaw twitched as he awaited her answer.

“Yes. At least I think so.”

Abe nodded. “I understand. If you want me to leave this thing alone, I will, since we really don't have any evidence of a crime, but if you want me to continue, just say so.”

She paused, weighing her answer carefully. “I think I'd like you to continue, even though I'm not sure I want to know what you might find out. Does that make sense?”

“Sure it does. I'd feel the same way in your shoes.”

Toni turned back toward the window, surprised to find they were only a couple of miles from the River View turnoff. She found herself looking forward to getting home, even though she knew it meant that she would have to give Melissa some sort of explanation for her trip with Abe. How complete that explanation would be she had not yet decided.

As they pulled up in front of the house, Toni was shocked to see the silver Lexus parked in the driveway. What was Brad doing there? Had he forgotten that she and Melissa had plans for the day? Suddenly,
explaining the afternoon's outing to Melissa didn't seem nearly as difficult as explaining it to Brad.

Abe had no sooner parked his car on the street in front of the house than the front door opened and out stepped Brad and Melissa. Melissa still wore the hurt, accusatory look that Toni had last seen on her face as she had assured her younger sister that she was not leaving to go on a date with Abe. But as well as Toni knew Brad, she couldn't be sure about his expression. He was wearing what she called his “courtroom face,” which could include angry, upset, confused, scared—but most of all, determined. She took a deep breath and stepped out of the car. Abe had already gotten out and come around to join her. Together they walked toward their welcoming committee.

Before Toni could open her mouth, Abe jumped in. “Brad,” he said, extending his right hand. “It seems we keep running into each other. How are you?”

Stiffly, Brad shook Abe's hand. “Fine. And you?”

Abe smiled. “I'm doing fine, thanks.” He turned to Melissa. “And how are you, Melissa? I haven't seen you in a while. How's your friend—Carrie, is it? You two must be glad to be out of school for the summer.”

Toni could tell Melissa was trying hard to be polite without showing any disloyalty to Brad. “We're… fine.”

As Toni wondered what to say or do next, Abe turned to her and said, “Well, I'd better get going. Thanks for coming along with me. I'll be talking to you.”