Obsession (Endurance) (6 page)

“No.” 
I wasn’t going to argue.  “I can do this.  Can you help me to the
chair? 
Fuck
!”  My eyes shot to Bianca’s and I said, “I’m
sorry…it isn’t you.  I’m sorry.”

Bianca
came to the side of the bed and helped me sit up.  “Ellie, I realize that
being the resident Pollyanna has saturated your entire life but I think you’re
allowed some pain-induced fury.  It is perfectly understandable.”

Thirty
minutes later I was showered and dressed in cotton shorts and a super soft tank
top.  The shower had been an exercise in pain control.  I wasn’t sure
whether the droplets on my skin were water or sweat.  Every movement
hurt. 

Padme
braided my hair in a thick plait down my back. 

I
nodded and the two women took me into the main room.  Fiaaz and Si were
watching Hyde’s room nervously. 

“What
is it?  What’s wrong?”

Bianca
pushed me over to the seating area and Fiaaz lifted me to the sofa.  I
couldn’t control the whimper that escaped me.  “We need to give you pain
medication, Ellie.  You aren’t meant to sustain this.”

“I
can’t take anything.  I
won’t
.  I can handle it.” 

Everyone
was on edge and it was freaking me out.  This group did not
get
edgy.  When people with their training got edgy, really bad shit went
down.  “Did something happen?  Is Hyde…did Hyde
leave
?” 
Padme lifted my hand and I realized I’d been digging my short nails into the
top of my thigh. 

Seeming
shocked at the very suggestion that Hyde would quit, Fiaaz said carefully,
“Ellie, we will need you to remain very calm.”  He crouched beside
me.  “There is a secret only those in this room and your parents are aware
of.  There is no way to keep it from you anymore because neither of them
will stand down from guarding you around the clock.”

I
rubbed my temples, trying to ease the pain.  “I…Fiaaz, I get…I get
headaches.  Please, what is it?  I don’t understand.  Is he
angry with me?  Neither of
who
?”  I was breathing hard and
hurting and just wanted to understand what was going on.

Bianca
came to smooth my hair away from my face.  I realized I was slick with
sweat.  “Ellie, please let us get you something for the pain. 
Please.”  I shook my head once sharply.  “Ssh, Ellie, slow your
breathing, love.  Slow.  Yes, that’s it.  Just like that. 
Slow and steady.” 

She
turned and took a cup and saucer from Si.  I stared at it in
suspicion.  “No, Ellie.  Just herbal tea.  It won’t hurt you or
the baby.  You know we wouldn’t let anything happen to you or your baby,
Ellie.  This is a brew Si made just in case you wouldn’t take the pain
meds.  Small sips to help with the pain, sweetheart.”

I
tried to take it but my hand was shaking too badly and I was so angry at
myself, so tired of being weak and confused.  “Where is
Hyde
,
Bianca?  Tell me and I’ll drink the fucking tea!  Where is he? 
I didn’t mean for him to be hurt.  I didn’t mean for any of this to
happen.  I’m sorry.  I’m so sorry.” 

I
was crying and I
did not
want to cry anymore. 

Bianca
was crying and I’d
never
seen her cry.  “No, Ellie,
no
.” 

I
heard Hyde’s door open but couldn’t move my own body around to look.  He
came around the end of the couch and I gasped, wincing at his busted lip,
putting my fingers over my own lips as fresh tears fell down my cheeks. 

The
apology was on the tip of my tongue when
another
Hyde appeared at the
first’s shoulder with a bandage that looked to be covering a gunshot wound on
his shoulder.  I could see bandages wrapped around his torso covering
other wounds. 

The
confusion that swamped me made me incoherent.  I rubbed my temple hard and
whispered, “G…gunshot wound?  I…I don’t remember a gunshot wound. 
I’m sure I don’t.” 

I
took a deep breath and closed my eyes for a long moment while I gathered my
thoughts.  Opening them, I lifted my head. 

There
were still two Hydes standing in front of me.  One version had a busted
lip – I had put it there in the middle of the night.  The other Hyde’s
lips were perfect but he had a gunshot wound. 

I
whispered brokenly, “Am I
losing
my mind right now?”

Padme,
the queen of anti-melodrama, said quietly, “Twins, Ellie.”

Almost
a minute passed while everyone stared at me and I said nothing.  Then I
started to laugh and couldn’t stop myself until I was sobbing. 

My
mother was called and the room was cleared. 

Sitting
on the couch, she pulled my head carefully over her lap so she could play with
my hair.  Unbraiding the entire length, she began to plait tiny braids
absently.  She let me calm completely before expecting me to speak. 
It took a while.

“Mom,
why didn’t you
tell
me?  Why didn’t
they
tell me?”

She
took a long moment to answer.  “When we searched for your security team,
we went through underground channels that would curl your hair, Ellie.  We
wanted the best of the best for our daughter.”  Her fingers worked gently,
methodically, and it reminded me of my childhood. 

“People
who had enough experience and ruthlessness to protect you while maintaining
enough humanity to understand they’d be watching over a very young woman with a
sweet and gentle soul.”

I
laughed softly.  “You certainly found them.  Every one of them is
lethal yet so kind to me.”

A
small smile flitted over Mom’s face.  “Yes.  The meeting to secure
your staff was done at the Salt Flats at midnight.  Daddy and I
interviewed each person ourselves.  Hyde was known throughout the world as
the best bodyguard money could buy.  His entire career,
no one
knew
he was a twin except those in the highest chain of command.  His safety
and the safety of his missions relied heavily on that secrecy, Ellie.”

“For
four
years
, Mom?”  I asked incredulously

“Five,
Ellie.  Your team has shadowed you since before you turned eighteen, even
before you left for college.”  Her confession rocked me.  I’d never
even suspected.  “It was the white slavery threats we received before your
high school graduation, you see?  A wealthy heiress, eighteen, a confirmed
virgin…there had already been two kidnapping attempts before you ever left
home.” 

She
shook her head fiercely and I saw the lioness that lived inside my
mother.  “We had to keep you safe.”

I
wrapped my mind around this information and gave a self-mocking laugh.
 “Two out of three of those descriptions are no longer even accurate,
Mom.” 

“Ellie,
that’s so cold.”

“My
life
is cold, Mom.”  I saw her flinch as I slowly sat up and rubbed
my face.  My hair fell around me as I rested my good arm on my good leg
and tried to still the raging pain in every cell.  “So basically, they’ve
been covering me and changing places for five years.  I never even
suspected.” 

I
had to
know
.  I had to
face
it.  “What happened that
day?”

Mom’s
eyes went wide.  “You haven’t asked Hyde?”  I was the one who
flinched this time.  “You’re…embarrassed to ask.  Oh,
Ellie
. 
Why?”

“He…they
wouldn’t have been hurt if it wasn’t for me.”  Mom started to dispute it
and I interrupted.  “Tell me.  Just tell me what happened,
Mom.” 

“Jordan
was shot three times on the other side of the park with a silenced 9mm. 
He got an emergency signal out before he lost consciousness.  It took
Fiaaz and Bianca almost an hour to locate where his body had fallen in the
brush.  Jonas was hit with a tranquilizer dart, taken with you, beaten
near to death.” 

Mom
couldn’t look at me, “The tranquilizer dart was supposed to be for
you
. 
They had to use it on Hyde.  They thought they’d already killed him.”

My
nails were gouging into my palm and I asked hoarsely, “Are they all dead?”

“All
captured, tortured for exactly the amount of time you were held, and killed
painfully…yes.”

“So
why am I finding out about them now?  They both nearly died…”  I
rubbed my hand over my heart, the pain there was excruciating and it had
nothing to do with my physical injuries.  “I’d quit and move on, not
reveal my trade secret.”

A
soft snort came from Mom, “Yeah, right, you’d
quit
.  You’ve never
quit anything.  I’m surprised you know the word.”  She reached out to
smooth my hair.  “They can’t hide their distinctive wounds, Ellie, and
both of them refuse to stand down.  They flat out
refuse
to leave
you but you’re sharp and you know them very well.”

Not
nearly as well as I’d thought. 

“They
didn’t want to tell you the truth while you were still in the worst of your
recovery.  They took Si and hunted those men down; paid them back for what
they did to you.  All of your people, including Padme, wanted to capture
and hold them, drag the torture out for weeks, but it was decided they couldn’t
leave you with a partial staff that long.”  Her eyes were cold and I saw
the lioness again, “I told them to make those hours
count
, Ellie.”

Mom
stood up and went into the kitchen, coming back with a glass of orange
juice.  “You’re still anemic and your blood sugar is shit.  Drink up,
baby.”  I took it gratefully and considered things. 

So
many things made sense now. 

Others
were far more confusing. 

I’d
been in love with Hyde since the first year I’d known him…
them
. 
Finding out there were
two
of them was devastating to my heart but there
was nothing I could do about it. 

I
had to minimize my vulnerabilities.  If I could feel a little stronger,
that would go a long way toward reinforcing the walls around my heart even
though I already knew it was too late for that foolishness. 

I
pulled out my phone and dialed Theresa’s personal number.  “Ellie, how are
you feeling?”

I
gave her a quick update then told her why I’d called.  “I want the soft
casts.  I have no mobility.  I’ll wear them longer if you want, I’ll
even wear them to bed.  It’s not like I can go running or riding even with
the soft casts.  It would be nice to be able to get in and out of the
shower without a production.  Yes?  You’re the best.  Want me to
come over?  I’ll be there in ten minutes.”

My
mother’s eyes were positively huge.

“Everything’s
fine, Mom.  I’m going to see Theresa.  I have my PT appointment in
two hours.  I’m glad I know now.”  I worked my way into my wheelchair
and Mom pushed me to the door.  “I need a different chair I can use by
myself.  Will you get that for me?” 

Mom
nodded, looking at me strangely.  I opened the door into the hall. 
The men and women who’d been with me for years, protected me, been injured for
me stood there. 

“It’s
all good.  The more the merrier.  Just a bit of a shock, of
course.  Nothing I can’t handle.  Time to get these casts off.”

Padme
jumped violently.  “What do you mean you’re taking the casts off? 
Ellie, you have another two weeks.”

“Hell
no.  I’m tired of being an invalid.  Mom is bringing me a wheelchair
I can operate on my own.”  I looked over my shoulder at my mom.
 “Please tell me there is food downstairs once I get this done.”

“Of
course.  Mrs. Safoya and Cook have been cooking all morning.”

“Excellent,
let’s do this.”  Avoiding looking at any of them for too long, I let Mom
push me into Theresa’s suites and offices.  An hour later, with X-rays to
prove I was healing well enough to justify the cast removal, she and her
assistant cut them off my body. 

The
vibration of the saw had me clenching my jaw so hard my teeth hurt.  I
gripped the edge of the table with a white-knuckled hand and I could feel the
sweat pooling between my breasts and soaking my back. 

Hyde,
both of them, stood just inside the door and neither looked happy. 

“Ellie,
are you sure?”  Theresa wasn’t, I could tell.

“Finish
it.  Please
hurry
and finish it.”  I powered through it
because I didn’t have a choice and I was so tired of not being in control of
the simplest aspects of my life.  I pretended the tears running from the
corners of my eyes didn’t exist and when Theresa wiped them away, I said
nothing.

Before
she was done cleaning my leg and attaching the soft cast and boot, Bianca
entered with an automated wheelchair.  She and Padme stood on either side
and watched me carefully. 

I
made small talk with Theresa and Adam, her assistant.  I wasn’t ignoring
my team; I just wasn’t ready to face them.  Adam was cute enough but my
jaded mind considered him much younger than me though I was sure he had to be
older given the education he would have undertaken.  He flirted like a man
who didn’t get out much and I tried to have mercy on him.