Obsession (Endurance) (10 page)

“Ellie!” 
The Hyde brothers tugged me carefully to a stop, surrounded me, held me still,
and I couldn’t look at them.  “What?  Tell us, Ellie.”

“M…mulch
and…and dirt.  I…” 

I
turned away, dropped to my knees, and vomited in the bushes.  Gentle hands
stroked my hair, rubbed my back, whispered soothingly to me.  I was
mortified as I lost everything in my stomach and couldn’t stop the dry heaves.

“It’s
alright.  You’re safe, Ellie.  You’re safe.”  The feel of their
hands on me, so strong and warm but still incredibly gentle, began to calm
me.  After what felt like forever, the roiling in my stomach eased and I knelt
there, unsure what to say or do. 

A
tissue was placed in my hand and I wiped my mouth before a bottle of water
replaced it.  Rinsing and spitting several times, I finally sipped it,
allowing it to cool the burn the bile had left behind. 

“No
one will ever hurt you again, Ellie.”

I
managed to get the words, “I’m sorry” out but I knew if I didn’t get out of the
garden – and the various beds being freshly prepared as they were every spring
– I was going to throw up again.  I pressed my hand against my stomach and
was bodily lifted to my feet. 

“No
more apologies, Ellie.  You’ve done
nothing
you need to apologize
for.”  They guided me through the house to my suite and waited in my
bathroom doorway as I brushed my teeth and washed my face. 

Jonas
asked, “Do you want to lie down?”

I
shook my head.  “I’d like to sit in the solarium if that’s alright.” 
Within moments I was settled between the two men on one of the couches at one
end of the space.  Si appeared with iced green tea laced with honey
intended to soothe my throat. 

I
had never been so close to both of them at the same time.

I
leaned my head back against the cushions and closed my eyes.  When they
took my hands, I squeezed theirs but said nothing.  I couldn’t. 
Other than my parents and some of their friends, I didn’t experience much
physical contact that wasn’t for a purpose. 

Something
so simple, so kind as holding my hands in comfort, had me close to tears and I
could
not
let them know how much their touch affected me.  I was afraid they
would take it away.

We
sat there for a long time in silence and I dosed off.  When I opened my
eyes, surprised at how warm I was, I discovered my head on…Jordan’s…shoulder
and Jonas had moved closer.  Their sides were sealed to mine and I’d never
felt so safe in my life.  Jonas had my hand in both of his and his thumb
was smoothing along the inside of my wrist. 

I
flicked my gaze to his and he smiled.  “You need to eat, Ellie.”

“Everyone
tries to feed me an awful lot around here,” I told him.

“Hmm,
because you forget to feed yourself.  Come.”  They stood in sync and
never let go of my hands, pulling me up to stand between them. 

Jordan
ran his hand over my hair.  “Better?”  I nodded.  “Good.” 
Then he pulled me into a quick hug before I was turned and hugged by
Jonas.  Without another word, they led me downstairs where my parents
waited with Katie. 

The
world suddenly seemed to be a much brighter place.

As
soon as Theresa released me for full regular activity, she let me know she was
heading back to Boston to start her new clinic. 

“I
will
miss you
, Ellie.  Though this has been a trying year for you,
it’s made me remember what family is supposed to be.  I need to reconnect
with mine.  I hope you’ll come visit me often and bring the baby.”

We
sat talking for a long time and a week later the medical rooms were empty and
my friend was gone after an emotional parting.  I was hugged too tightly
by Adam and he asked me to stay in touch.  I patted his shoulder and
barely managed not to snap his neck until he let me go.  When he stepped
back, he glared at Jonas and Jordan who stood no more than six inches from my
back.

I
was glad when his effusive goodbyes were done and he left the estate. 

I
walked across the grounds to take a look at the condition of my own home. 
Most people would think it was an extravagant guest house when in fact it had
been built specifically for me when I was seventeen, my senior year of high
school.  I’d designed and decorated it myself and moved back here after
college. 

I
hadn’t been inside my home since I’d been released from the hospital.

The
front entry was wide and brightly lit.  The first floor held a kitchen
with a smaller dining room, a library, two living areas, two bedrooms with
bathrooms, a full gym and sauna, and a large semi-covered patio with a swimming
pool and hot tub.  The main rooms were all done in earth tones. 

Each
member of the team had worked with me to decorate their rooms for the most
comfort.  Si and Fiaaz had always slept on the first floor, closest to the
kitchen and garage.  The true reason was because they covered the front
and back of the house. 

Si’s
room featured low profile furniture I’d asked him to help me select, with a
black and white color scheme, giving the room a decided dojo quality.  Since
he meditated every morning, the area beneath one window held plants and thick
floor cushions.

Fiaaz
preferred heavy furniture with a royal blue palate.  Heavy mats allowed
him to practice body isolations privately instead of using the main gym. 
His balance and gymnastic ability were incredible.

The
second floor held five bedrooms, each with their own bathrooms.  Since I
hadn’t known there were two Hyde brothers, I’d decorated their room in green to
match their eyes.  It was right next to mine.  The other room beside
me was a guest room. 

Padme’s
room was filled with vibrant colors and hand-carved furniture.  One wall
featured a hidden staircase to her security room behind the kitchen.  A
nook had been converted to private workspace and was filled with all the
technology she used regularly. 

Bianca’s
room was done in cool blues and iridescent creams, resembling an ice palace but
strangely comfortable and welcoming.  Much like the woman herself. 

My
room, sitting room, bathroom, and office were done in varying shades of browns
and greens.  From caramel to espresso, sage to emerald.  I used ivory
as an accent color and loved the peace I always felt here. 

I
was transforming the uppermost floor into the nanny’s quarters, nursery, and
massive playroom.  The stairs were right outside my bedroom. 

I
spent an hour walking through the house and re-familiarizing myself with the
spaces.  I made notes on my iPad for Padme to help me coordinate and
grinned at the puppy who followed me into each room and promptly fall
asleep. 

The
first change would be to give each brother their own room.  I would give
one of them the guest room across the hall; there were plenty of guest rooms in
the main house. 

“You
look like you’ve missed the place.”  Jonas was beside me, silently
approaching as usual. 

“I
have.  I’m ready to move back into my own home.  I don’t want to get
stuck under my parent’s roof.  I know I’m still on the property but…it’s
different.  I feel like I took the coward’s way out by staying with them
so long.” 

Jonas
turned to me and said carefully, “You needed the break, Ellie.  You
shouldn’t beat yourself up for needing your family around you.  I’m glad
you’re feeling strong enough to come back here though.”  I watched him
swallow hard but he said nothing more.

A
few weeks later, the contractors and cleaning crew declared the house ready,
and we moved back in.  I still had the penthouse in LA where I’d lived in
college. 

Everyone
giddily dispersed to settle back in and I headed up to my room.  I watched
the Hyde brothers disappear into their old room and I walked up to knock on the
door.  Jordan opened it and smiled at Katie in my arms. 

I
cleared my throat and steadied my voice.  “I…you each have your…your own
rooms.  One of you can take the other one across the hall.  I had it
redone.  If you want, that is.  I figured…well, anyway.  See you
guys at dinner.” 

I
carried Katie into my room and lay down on the bed with her.  She was
starting to smile all the time and I loved that.  “You are such a very
good girl.  So happy and lovely.  No one anywhere could ask for a
better baby.  I think you’ll like your room, Katie.  I wanted you to
have the run of a huge floor.  When you’re big enough, I’m going to have
Dad…Grandpa find my old wooden horse for you.  Don’t get me started on
your first real horse, little love.  I will pick the sweetest darling for
you and you’ll ride with Mommy all over the estate.” 

Katie
laughed and it filled me with pure happiness.  “Don’t you have the
prettiest little tinkling laugh?  Oh Katie, I am so grateful for
you.  No little girl will ever be loved like you…well, except for me with
my own parents but
you’re
going to give them fits.  I think they
argue over which of them loves you more, can you imagine?”  I smoothed her
blonde curls.  “May I also say you are an
excellent
listener,
Katie?” 

A
sound at the door made me look up.  The Hyde brothers stood just inside
the room, looking gorgeous and huge in a room that wasn’t small.  I
realized I was sprawled on my stomach talking to a four-month-old and I
blushed.  “We were having a little chat.  Everything alright?”

“Ellie…”

“You’ll
have to come closer or tell me which is which.  I can’t see scars from
here,” I said cheekily.  Katie laughed and I had to give her a proud
smile.  “Yes, you probably have them all figured out already.  So
much smarter than Mommy aren’t you, baby?”

When
I looked up again, both men were crouched at the side of the bed, a bare foot
from me.  “You move so silently.  I don’t jump anymore, I bet that
was annoying.”

“Ellie,
thank you for giving us each our own rooms.  You didn’t have to do that.”

“Of
course I did.  Either you were trying to share a bed or one of you got the
floor.  Either way, it’s not necessary since there was an empty
room.  Does everyone have what they need?”

Jordan
smiled, “You added flat-screens to all the bedrooms.  Yeah, they’re happy,
Ellie.  Thank you but now you have no guest rooms.”

I
snorted, “There are plenty up at the main house and besides, who comes to
visit?  I don’t need guest rooms.  I would have done that
originally…you know…if I’d known.  There was no need for you to be cramped
with no privacy.  I understand why you had to do it in the field, life and
death…I mean…nevermind.  It’s all fixed.”

The
brothers were staring at me and I had that gazelle feeling again.  A knock
across the room broke the spell and Padme jumped up on the bed beside me. 
“You are our queen.  I love the shoe racks!”

Glancing
at the brothers, I winked, “You say flat-screens, Padme says shoe racks.” 
They laughed and I was struck dumb.  I’d never understood that expression
before.  I was blinking too much and my mouth was dry. 

“I…I
haven’t seen the nursery yet.  We should go up and check it out. 
Katie told me her space better be perfect or she’s going back to
Grandma’s.”  With that, I backed off the bed and grabbed up my
daughter. 

Bianca
was coming down the hall.  “Robyn’s here.”  Robyn was the nanny I’d
hired from a pool my parents had presented.  I was pretty sure she was a
ninja Mary Poppins and I was just fine with that. 

“Perfect
timing.  We’re going up to check out the nursery.  Come on up.” 
I headed upstairs with the big silly puppy beside me.

Nothing
I’d designed, nothing the contractor had suggested, prepared me for the reality
of a full attic space conformed into a child’s fantasy. 

Fully
repainted with pastels, a mural on one wall depicting a fairy wood, and
colorful lighting globes suspended from the crossbeams gave the space warmth I
could feel.  The carpet was pale green and lush.  There were huge
over-stuffed couches and chairs scattered around.  Diva sniffed everything
then went back and sniffed it all again.

Enormous
windows were filled with glass that could stop a .50 caliber bullet and
featured one-sided tint.  You could see out but no one could see in, no
matter how bright the space was lit up.  A built in cabinet with
bulletproof glass doors and recessed lighting held many of my keepsakes from my
childhood. 

On
the top shelf in the spotlight was Katie’s hope chest, my daughter’s name
glowing.  There were two large actual bedrooms at the far end, one for
Robyn and one for Katie.  A big bathroom was between them. 

“Miss
Fields, shall I take the little one?”

“Robyn,
please call me Ellie.  You’ll find we’re very informal here.  I
imagine you’ll be with us a good many years.  I believe Mom said you can
also take over Katie’s lessons before she begins school as well as her
comportment?  This is Texas.  She’ll be forced to make her debutante
debut.  I hated it, she will too.  Nonetheless, eighteen years of
‘Miss Fields’ or ‘Ellie’…what do you think?”