Oculus (Oculus #1) (11 page)

When I find my father, he’s in the kitchen rummaging for food. “…rations low—just—bull— more resources,” he mumbles to himself, making no sense whatsoever.

“I have news,” I spit out, eager to get the conversation over with.

“Oh? It couldn’t have anything to do with you talking to Chief Ingram today, could it?” His tone is admonishing and haughty enough to make me bite back the urge to snap back at him.

“As a matter of fact it has everything to do with that.” I try my best not to let his foreknowledge set me off kilter, which is no small feat.

“What’s your news then, Iris?”

“Chief Ingram has been generous enough to see if he can find a suitable job for me in the security department. I’m not entirely sure what I could do bu—”

“Absolutely not.” The finality in his voice is shocking, infuriating.

“I’m sorry?”

“No, Iris.”

“No?”

“That’s right. No. I won’t have my only daughter working anywhere near that piece of work. He’s no good, Iris and he doesn’t
just do things
out of the kindness of his heart. He’s corrupt. Everyone knows it.”

“No?” I sputter, feeling an onslaught on emotions ranging from anger to sadness to helplessness to recklessness.

“I was thinking we could make barley and beef stew for dinner but the rations are low with eleven more days until Procurement Day—”

“Stop! To hell with dinner!” I shout, causing my own ears to ring in protest. “You seem to be under the impression that I was asking for your permission.”

“Iris,” he warns.

“No. Don’t.”

“Just calm down and we can discuss this if that’s what you want.”

“That’s exactly what I
wanted
. Now? Discussion is closed. I’m taking the job if Ingram offers one and you can just deal with it. I’m not a child, dad!”

“I don’t think it’s a good idea, Iris.”

“Well, I guess it’s a good thing I don’t require you to think for me. I can’t see but I
do
have a brain. I’m going out with Hattie tonight.”

“Iris!” I hear him shout as I make my escape into the cool night air.

“Shush!” Hattie’s boyfriend, Cade, shuffles us along insisting that we keep quiet. Hattie and I walk as a single unit as we always do when I’m unfamiliar with the layout of where I am. It’s quiet out tonight. I couldn’t hear anyone nearby only the distant buzz of the rail system. Our footfalls on the concrete under us are the only footsteps I can hear. I’m entirely certain but I sense that this is a good thing.

“But where is this hangout?”

“You’ll see,” he says quietly just before bringing us to a halt. “I have to put this on you. It’s for your own good.”

“What is tha—wait a second! I’m not letting you blindfold me!” Hattie protests, her body stiffening beside me. I can’t help the snort that escapes me.

“Welcome to my world. Don’t worry. I’m experienced,” I joke, leaning closer to her to whisper.

“I have to blindfold you. I don’t want you knowing how to get to the spot. Just in case.”

“In case what?” I can hear the sound of fabric rubbing against fabric as Hattie huffs, clearly unhappy with what Cade is doing but resigned to the fact that she’s going to go along with him anyway. So am I. I’m feeling rebellious and determined to distract myself from thinking too much about my father or Ingram or the bleak future that being blind has forced upon me.

Hattie’s grip tightens around my arm and for a moment I wonder what she must feel like walking in my shoes for the time being. I can only imagine that it must be unnerving being rendered suddenly blind, in the dark of night and headed to some secret destination.

The air is crisp and cool by comparison to the heat of the summer that we just survived. The sun retires earlier in the day now hinting at the promise of burgeoning fall. Seasons are never very distinguishable here, especially for me, but the receding heat of summer means cooler days are on the way.

We shuffle along thirty-six more comfortable paces before Cade halts us once again.

“Okay. You wanted to know where I go when I disappear. You accused me of seeing someone else but now you’ll know the truth. Neither one of you can speak of this to anyone.
Anyone!
Ever. You’d be putting others at risk so promise me you’ll say nothing.”

“Cade,” Hattie warns, clearly uncomfortable with where this night is going.

“I promise,” I whisper before really thinking about it. Hattie groans quietly.

“Okay. I promise.”

“Stay close. Keep quiet. Walk lightly,” he orders then guides us forward. “Step down,” he says helping both of us down a flight of stairs and then into what feels like a corridor. The acoustics make it seem like we are standing in some sort of passageway.

He silently guides us further into the corridor. I stick out my hand and allow my fingers to lightly brush against a wall. It’s concrete, cool and damp to the touch. For the first time since I stormed out on my father, I’m beginning to regret my sudden rebellion.

Muffled voices become clearer with each step we take, steps that I count. We walk for some time before we slow, pass through an opening, and climb down the rungs of a ladder.

Silence descends. Open fire crackles. The scent of the charred wood floats around me as the fire’s radiant heat warms my clammy hands.

“They’re with me. I’m responsible for them.
She’s
blind and
her
blindfold is staying on.”

I can feel Hattie tense at Cade’s declaration but she makes no movement that would contradict what he’s just said to the audience I can’t see but know we have.

Cade escorts us further forward. The fire grows warmer, the smoke thicker. He grasps my shoulder and pushes lightly, depositing both of us onto some type of metal bench.

“The Free Thought Librarians have now come to order,” Cade announces from somewhere in front of us.

I’m not sure whose gasp was louder, mine or Hattie’s. Her charming boyfriend has just walked us right into a death sentence.

“I look around at these books, I read these books and I wonder why The Corporation is so intent on making them illegal? The answer to that, my friends, is that Fenra and Talpa and all the rest of The Corps that handle us like they’re zoo keepers, want to keep us in the dark!”

The assembly of people around us let out a collective sound of approval, nudging Cade to go on but all I can think is that what we are doing is grounds for imprisonment, exile or death.

“They may keep The Resistance in The Dark Lands but they’re keeping us in the dark too!” Cade exclaims falling into a frenzied rhetoric. He’s quite the speaker and it’s obvious that he feels strongly about The Corps’ death grip on anyone and everyone within their walls.

His audience lets out another encouraging throng of sighs and grunts. It’s difficult to tell for certain but there has to be at least fifteen, maybe twenty people around us. Maybe more.

“Human beings were not designed to live this way. We were not designed to live with our hands bound behind our backs and that’s exactly what Fenra is doing to all of us! The Resistance is fighting for equality and liberty amongst all men and so are we! We will not be deterred. We will not back down. We will not give up!”

“Oh my god,” Hattie murmurs from beside me. She begins to shake. Or maybe I’m the one shaking. Or maybe we’re both trembling. Either way, I hug her arm closer to my side, silently comforting her.

“What right do they have to enslave? What right do they have to tell people when and if they’re
authorized
to have a child? What right do they have to scan or to ration
everything
? Food, drink, electricity, shelter…” He speaks with vigor and the more he says the more enraptured I become. Cade is saying what I haven’t quite realized I have always been thinking. How many more have been thinking the same things?

“What right do they have to forbid books from the old world? They don’t have that right but you know why they forbid the books and the old films and the old music? Because it would give hope! Well you know what I say to that? Outlaw my books, burn the old films and the music. I don’t care because
my hope
comes from within! And yours does too!”

“Stop this!” Hattie cries in vain against the subdued cheers of Cade’s audience. “This is pointless! The Corp is the only reason we all have a home! Fenra is the only reason we aren’t out there in the wilderness facing… whatever’s out there!”

“What’s out there is freedom! Freedom to make our own way. To hunt, to build, to grow, to live! Don’t you see that Fenra and all the other corporate compounds are just a prison?”

“Oh! Prison? Prison? Just being here makes all of you—
me
a criminal! We should leave,” Hattie implores, urging me to stand. “We’re leaving. How do we get back?” She grows more frantic by the minute. I hear a soft plop against the floor. She took off her blindfold so she can lead us away from the meeting.

“Jesus, Cade! What are you doing?” Hattie whispers pleadingly at her boyfriend. Everyone else falls completely silent as tension grows around us.

“I’m helping us. All of us.”

“No. You aren’t. You’re getting every single person in this room killed or at the very least, exiled to prison camps or Dark Lands.”

“She’s going to report us!” someone accuses in a gruff voice.

“And how exactly would I be able to do that without incriminating myself, genius? No, I’m not saying a word. This night never happened and I pray that the rest of you come to your senses and stop trying to bite the hand that feeds
all
of us! Come on,” I’m tugged forward and it takes me a moment to recall the mental map I created when we walked along with Cade. I just need to find the ladder then I’ll know exactly how to get out. It’s just a matter of counting.

“Hattie!” Cade calls as we make our way back into the concrete-walled passage, but he makes no attempt to follow us.

“I would rather he be banging someone else in his spare time!” Hattie grits out as we start back.

An involuntary laugh bubbles out of me despite the situation. There’s nothing else I can say or do. She’s right. An affair like she had suspected would have been far better than what he’s doing. Cheating on your girlfriend of four months usually ends with a heated argument and perhaps some tears, maybe even a bad reputation, but treason usually ends with a bullet taking up residence somewhere in your skull.

“Maybe it’s just harmless talk. They aren’t
doing
or planning anything. It didn’t sound like it anyway. Cade really is a great guy, Hattie.”

“Doesn’t matter. If Corp Security finds out about these meetings he’s hosting, they’ll round up anyone and everyone involved. I may be accused for simply dating him!”

“Hey. Don’t panic. I’ll be working in security. I’ll keep an ear out. You’re fine.” With that, my decision to sell myself to the devil himself is solidified. I’ll have to take Chief Ingram up on his offer. I’ll be protecting my best friend and securing myself a little independence. My palm drifts back and forth across Hattie’s shoulder blades soothingly like my father used to when I was little. “We’re going to be just fine,” I whisper, wondering if it’s her that I’m trying to convince or myself.