Official Girl 4 (3 page)

             
One day, when I get serious and settle down, I want a woman like my mom; strong, independent, beautiful, loving, determined, smart and sophisticated. I had been kicking it with this girl I went to school with named Chyanne and she reminded me of my mom a little. She was beautiful and very smart; the good girl type, so I have to be very careful with her.

             
“Dad, how many times have you been in love?” I asked as we watched TV.

             
“One time, why?” he looked at me funny.

             
“I’m just wondering. Who was it?” I asked, even though I already I knew what the answer would be.

             
“The only person I gave my last name to, of course.”

             
“So you mean to tell me all those years you were with that Kya chick you didn’t love her? Seven years is a long time to be with somebody and not love them.”

             
“I never said I didn’t love her, I just wasn’t in love with her. I was in love with the things she could do. She was more of a convenience for me.”

             
“So when you met mom, how did you know you was in love with her and not just infatuated?”

             
“Imma tell you like yo Pop-Pop told me, if your heart flutters when you see her then it’s love. But if she only makes your dick hard, it might just be lust. She made my heart flutter every time I seen her, even now it still flutters,” he said, smiling.

             
“Sucka fa love.” I laughed.

             
“Whatever lil nigga, wait until it happens to you, you’ll understand then,” he said, mushing me.

             
“I guess.”

             
“So Mykell Jr., are you still a virgin?” he asked out of nowhere.

             
“Should I be a virgin?” I retorted.

             
“What a virgin daddy?” Amyricale asked from behind us.

             
“Something you better be for the rest of your life,” he said, kissing her face as she climbed in his lap.

             
She giggled. “Silly daddy.”

             
The house phone started to ring so I got up and answered it, shaking my head at my dad and sister.

             
“Hello?” I answered.

             
I got happy when I heard the operator speaking. I was happy to hear from my mom. I truly missed her.

             
“Hey ma, how you doing?” I said as soon as I pressed zero.

             
“Hey baby, I’m good. What you doing?”

             
“Sitting here with dad and MyMy.” I said.

             
“Where’s Fat Fat and Tyriq?” she asked.

             
“Upstairs in Romell’s room.”

             
“You keeping them out of trouble?”

             
“You know I am.” I laughed.

             
“Alright, I love you. Let me talk to your dad real quick.”

             
“Love, you too.” I handed the phone to my dad and left the room.

             
“MJ,” I heard from behind me.

             
“Wassup, Princess?” I said as I picked Amyricale up.

             
“Is Mommy coming home? Her no love me?” she said pouting.

             
“Of course mommy is coming home baby girl, and she loves you very much. She just has some stuff she has to get together.”

             
“Sure?”

             
“I’m sure.”

             
“Okay!” she perked up.

             
It hurt that my sister thought ma didn’t love her anymore. She was taking it the worst out of all of us kids. I think it’s because she doesn’t really understand what’s going on. Even Tyriq was taking it well, and he was her damn shadow when she was home. I was just ready for all this nonsense to be over.

             
These damn kids of mine were going to drive me crazy! Every day they found something else to stress me out about. I had one daughter behind bars, one daughter losing her mind behind her child’s father, and a son trying to go through with a custody battle. What’s next? I’m barely fifty years old and already got grey hairs. That’s not acceptable. I don’t know what the hell is wrong with these damn kids. I’ll be happy when they get their shit together. I feel like I’m running a damn crazy house. It seems like every time I say something to them, it goes in one ear and out the other.

             
“Noah, what the hell we gon do about these damn kids?” Big Mone asked.

             
“Man, I don’t even know.” I shook my head.

             
He fixed himself a drink then sat in a chair in the den. “Who would have thought that we would be best friends as kids and teenagers, lose touch, then I come home and find out my daughter is dating your son.”

             
I chuckled. “I knew the moment Le’Lani brought her home for me to meet her. I knew exactly who she was. So instantly I took her in as family. She looks just like Sharice.”

             
“Doesn’t she, it kind of scares me sometimes because she acts just like her too. But Le’Lani, that’s Cherry all the way.” He laughed.

             
“Tell me about, it’s like another Cherry all over again.” I shook my head. “We had some good girls though, Mone.”

             
“Yes we did, which is why it should be no surprise our daughters are the way they are. They are their mothers’ children.”

             
“Yea, but it’s just something’s not right with this Zamier dude. I get a real funny feeling with him.”

             
“He seems like the controlling type. I’m still trynna figure out how he just took Lani out of here and told her that she’s moving in with him.” He shook his head.

             
“Man, you should have seen the look on your son’s face when he found out. I thought he was going to lose his mind.”

             
“He handled it way better than I would have. I just don’t agree with him trying to take her to court for custody of Ranyla though, that doesn’t sit well with me because no matter what, Lani is a good mother.”

             
“Yea but the only thing we can do is give them our advice, the choice is really up to them,” I said.

             
“Yea, you’re right,” he agreed.

             
Hopefully they make the right choice.

             
For the past two weeks, I’ve been feeling like someone is watching me. I would tell Micah but he’s already dealing with a lot with Neicey being locked up and he says Le’Lani has been acting funny lately; so the last thing I want to do is add on to his stress. Our relationship has been going great, minus the disagreements we have, but that’s normal. Lil Mack looks more and more like his daddy every day. Ranee is still my mini-me. Whenever their dad walks into a room, they forget all about me. He has the both of them so spoiled.

             
“Mama, Lil Mack wants his bottle,” Ranee said, walking into the kitchen.

             
“Where is it?” I asked.

             
“He left it in his car seat in the car.”

             
Damn,
I thought. “Alright, keep an eye on your brother while I go get it.”

             
I walked outside to the driveway to grab his bottle. I noticed an all black Navigator across the street but thought nothing of it.
It’s probably one of the neighbors.
I unlocked the door and reached in the backseat.

             
“Wassup Nae Nae, long time no see,” I heard from behind me and instantly froze. I turned around and was face to face with the last person I expected to see.

             
“B-Bishop? What are you doing here? I thought you were locked up,” I said, staring at my deceased ex-boyfriend’s brother.

             
“Well not anymore, apparently.”

             
“What do you want?” I asked as I glanced back towards the house.
I’m so happy Micah’s not here.

             
“You know what I want. How’s my niece doing? Or should I say my daughter?” he asked with malice dripping from his voice.

             
My heart dropped and a lump formed in my throat.

             
“What are you talking about Bishop? Ranee is not your daughter; I don’t know what would make you think that.”

             
“Oh, you know why, don’t play dumb with me Janae,” Bishop said, walking closer to me.

             
“Mama!” I turned around to see my son standing there rubbing his eyes.

             
“Go back in the house baby; I’ll be in there in a minute,” I said.

             
“Okay,” he said, running back in the house.

             
“Look Janae, you better stop playing with me and let me see my daughter.”

             
“She’s not your daughter Bishop! You know Rodney is her father.”

             
“How would you know if you never got a DNA test done? Keep playing with me if you want to, you won’t like the outcome,” he said, walking back towards the navigator.

             
“Shit,” I yelled as I ran back into the house, locking the door. I went straight to my bedroom, ignoring my kids in the process. I let out a breath I didn’t even realize I was holding when I reached Micah’s and my bedroom. I shook my head, deeply regretting the day wish I could take back.

             
Rodney was out of town taking care of some business and I had just come home from having a girl’s night out with my friends. I really wasn’t a party girl, but they talked me into going, plus being in that house and day and night without Rodney was making me lonely.

             
I ran to the bathroom to use it when I walked through the door. I had just finished washing my hands when I heard the front door shut. I knew it was Bishop because he was the only one that had a key to our house. I staggered into the living room, barely able to walk. Bishop was wobbling and I could tell that he was fucked up too.

             
“Shit, what you doing here Nae Nae?” he slurred.

             
“Huh? I live here.” I shook my head as I flopped down on the couch.

             
“Shit, you do don’t you? Damn.” He had a stupid grin on his face.

             
I stared at him and it was crazy how much he and his brother looked alike. They both were caramel with light brown eyes and smiles that any woman would fall for. If you didn’t know any better, you would think that they were twins.

             
The next thing I knew, I felt a hand on my thigh. The liquor already had me horny and the fact that he looked just like my baby had me really messed up. He pressed his lips against mine and shoved his tongue down my throat. I could taste the liquor with a mix of weed, but I still returned the kiss. I knew what I was doing is wrong but I did just like Jamie Foxx said to do and blamed it on the liquor. He pushed me back and laid me down on the couch while climbing on top of me.

             
“We can’t Bishop. What about Rodney?” I asked.

             
“Shhh, I won’t tell if you don’t,” he slurred.

             
Before I could protest anymore, I felt his hardness slide into my warmth.

             
“Uhh,” I moaned.

             
“See, I knew you wanted it just as bad I as I do. I don’t know why you be playing,” he said as he pumped away.

             
The whole night I made love to my boyfriend’s older brother. To make matters worse, Rodney came home three days later and I made love to him like nothing ever happened. A month later, I found out I was pregnant. Rodney went to his grave never knowing what happened between me and his brother.

             
“Yo baby!” Micah said, walking into the room and shaking me from my thoughts.

             
“Yea,” I said, turning around to face him.

             
“What’s wrong? You didn’t hear me calling you?” he asked.

             
“No, I’m sorry. What’s up?” I walked over to him giving him a kiss.