Offside (55 page)

I don't know how long I just sobbed with her holding me, alternating between screaming about everything he put me through and just sobbing incoherently. Eventually I quieted down and could hear Nicole's voice in my ear.

“It's okay,” she whispered. “You're okay now. He can't hurt you anymore.”

Once I stopped blubbering, Greg was there, handing me a glass of water and a box of tissues. I cleaned myself up, definitely fully embarrassed now, and drank the water. It felt good on my throat. When I had myself relatively composed, I looked back to Greg through still-bleary eyes.

“It's his fault,” I repeated softly. “He's going to foot the bill for this.”

Greg eyed me for a minute and then crossed his arms.

“We'll split it,” he finally said. I knew from his tone of voice it was final, so I nodded in agreement.

With that decided, Nicole showed me around the makeshift bedroom a little bit and told me Jeremy was going to get some of my clothes and stuff from the house so I didn't have to go back there. Again, my emotions were completely ambivalent—I was extraordinarily grateful but hated that it had to be done that way.

“Oh!” Nicole suddenly cried out. “I almost forgot!”

She left my side and went around the bed to the nightstand. She opened the top drawer and pulled out a sketchbook and a box of drawing pencils.

“It's kind of a welcome home gift,” she explained as she placed them in my lap. I looked down at them with widened eyes. “I didn't really know what kind of pencils to get, but the guy at the art shop in town said these were kind of all-purpose. Lots of different types, I guess.”

I opened the box and looked over the different pencils, each labeled for hardness.

“They're perfect,” I whispered, trying to keep the tears from coming back again. I looked up at her. “Thank you.”

“You're welcome,” she replied with a smile.

Shakespeare said it best: “I can no other answer make but thanks, and thanks.” Somehow, I knew that there would never be enough words to express my gratitude to both Greg and my Rumple.

Now I was about ready to fall asleep right where I sat.

CHAPTER 31

GOAL

I wasn’t sure if it was my complete breakdown or just the weight of the entire day, but my eyes burned, and I could barely keep them open. Nicole seemed to sense that and asked me if there was anything I needed before I took a nap. I hadn’t actually mentioned needing one, but that’s just the way it was with my Rumple—I didn’t have to say it.

As I proved to myself that I could get in and out of the specialty-built bathroom, Greg decided he needed to go into the station to catch up on a bunch of paperwork or something. By the time I changed into a pair of sweatpants and a T-shirt, he was on his way out the door.

“I’ll see you kids later,” he announced. “Don’t hold up supper for me, though. I probably won’t be back until late.”

Nicole rolled her eyes toward him and then shook her head.

“He thinks he’s being subtle,” she said.

I snickered but was too tired for a full laugh. I reached down and pushed the wheelchair over to the edge of the bed. I slid onto the mattress, immediately noticing the purple pillowcase over the pillow, and ran my nose along it, smiling. I glanced up to see Nicole smirking at me, but I didn’t care. I rolled to my side, using my hands to pull one leg over the top of the other so I could get more comfortable. I wrapped my arms around the pillow and inhaled the scent surrounding me.

My eyes started to close almost immediately though I forced them open when I felt Nicole’s soft touch on my shoulder.

“You okay?” she asked softly. Her smirk was gone, and only concern remained in her eyes.

“Just tired,” I told her.

“Get some rest,” she said. Her fingers trailed down my arm, and when they reached my wrist, I caught her hand in mine and held tight. Her head tilted slightly to the side. “You want company?”

I nodded and pulled at her hand.

Her scent and warmth enveloped me, and I realized we had not been together like this since before I had dumped her at my father’s insistence. Even in the hospital and rehab center, there hadn’t been room for her in bed with me. Just having someone sit on the side of the bed had jostled me in ways that hurt.

I wrapped my arms around her, and as her body melded against mine, I exhaled heavily. All at once, the exhaustion of the day, the mental fatigue of the funeral, and the explosion of everything I had held inside of me for so long seemed to seep out of my body as I sank against my Rumple.

Sleepily, I tilted my head to look at her, and her arm went around my neck. I reached forward to press my lips to hers once and then twice. I would have kissed her a third time, but the combination of her hand soothing my cheek and the warm comfort of the bed overtook me. When I closed my eyes for the third kiss, my head dropped onto the pillow instead.

I woke when Nicole moved from the bed and tightened my grip a little bit and grumbled until I felt her lips on my temple.

“I’ll be right back,” she whispered. I released her reluctantly, and she climbed out of bed and headed into the kitchen. I dozed back off, and when I woke again, Nicole was sitting up in the bed with one arm draped around me and the other holding a copy of
Hunger Games
. From the direction of the kitchen, something smelled really good, and I lifted my head to tell her so.

“It’s kugel made from potatoes and carrots,” she told me. “It has to bake for a while, so I wanted to get it in the oven. I didn’t know how long you would want to sleep, but I thought you might be hungry when you woke up.”

“What’s a kugel?” I mumbled as I tucked my head against her stomach and wrapped my arms around her middle.

Nicole laughed.

“I’ll show you later,” she promised. “You don’t have to wake up yet if you don’t want to. Go back to sleep.”

I settled myself with my head basically in her lap and closed my eyes again. I listened to the sound of her turning the pages of her book, the sound of the rain on the roof as it began to pour, and the sound of Nicole’s stomach grumbling.

Rumple’s stomach was all…rumply.

I snickered against her leg.

“What are you laughing at?” she asked.

“Your tummy is noisy.”

I glanced up and Nicole was glaring down at me.

“Thanks a lot!” she snapped.

I wrapped my arms around said stomach and kissed it over her shirt.

“I love it,” I told her. I shifted back a bit, putting just a few inches of distance between us so I could see her better. “I love you.”

“I love you too.” Nicole’s expression softened, and she tossed the book upside down on the nightstand. “Still tired?”

“Not as much,” I said with a shrug.

Nicole slid down so we were lying beside each other again. With her hand positioned behind my head, she brought me forward and our lips met. The kisses were only soft at first, as they had been earlier in the day, but quickly turned into more. I absorbed the warmth and comfort of all of it—Nicole’s body, the house, the tiny room that was really just a part of the living room, and everything they had done for me even though they really didn’t have much to give.

Although Dad and I always seemed to have more money than we knew what to do with, I didn’t think I had felt so…
rich
…since Mom died.

Nicole’s hand moved over my shoulder and chest, her fingers digging into the fabric of my T-shirt and making me shiver. I ran my hand up her arm until I could cup her face, and I kissed her again and again, exploring her mouth and then letting her explore mine.

Nicole broke the kiss with a groan and pushed herself away from me.

“What?” I asked.

“I’m sorry,” she said. “I wasn’t thinking…I mean…shit, we shouldn’t…”

“Nicole, it’s okay.” I reached up and put a finger under her chin. “I really, really missed you. Missed this.”

I tightened my hold on her, bringing her closer until I could kiss her again.

“Are you sure?” she whispered. “I don’t want to…push.”

“You aren’t,” I insisted between more kisses. “I want this. I want you.”

Her fingers snuck underneath the edge of my shirt, and her palm splayed out over my stomach.

“You still have fantastic abs,” she mumbled into my mouth.

“Yeah?”

“Definitely.” Nicole backed off and looked at me quizzically. “At least they pretty much feel the same. I think I probably ought to see them to know for sure.”

“I see you get your subtlety from Greg,” I commented. “You want it off, baby? You only have to ask.”

I raised my eyebrows at her a couple times.

“Incorrigible,” she said then pursed her lips. “Take that shirt off, Thomas. I want to see you.”

“I will if you will,” I offered.

“You first,” she said with an eye roll.

I wasn’t going to argue, and I lifted myself just enough to pull the shirt over my head.

“Mmm…” Nicole hummed as her fingers ran over my stomach. “Yep—still quite nice.”

“At least some of me isn’t too bad,” I said and kind of cringed as the words came out. It sounded shitty, and I didn’t mean it that way.

Nicole’s hands captured my face as she stared at me.

“You are wonderful,” she whispered in earnest, “and if your legs never carry you again, they will still be the legs that had the speed to save me. The most important part of you is here, in your head.”

She took her right hand and placed it over the center of my chest.

“And here.”

We stared at each other for a long moment, and when we finally moved our eyes from each other’s, we had changed. At least, I thought we both had. I knew I had. My mind tried to cope with the paradigm shift that changed my outlook from being useful for nothing but my speed and my agility to…to…something else. I wasn’t sure exactly what it was yet, but I knew it meant more—much, much more.

“Rumple,” I whispered.

She shook her head slowly.

“Don’t talk,” she instructed, and her lips moved up my jaw, slowly nipping along the edge until she reached my ear. She sat up a little, and a moment later her own shirt joined mine on the floor beside the bed, followed quickly by her white, lacy bra.

I tried not to let my eyes bug out. It had been way, way too long since I had seen her tits, and I had forgotten how beautiful they were. It was as if they could become the center of a whole universe dedicated to my libido.

Even as I sat up against the pillows, and Nicole lifted her leg to straddle my waist, I knew all the physical stuff—as wonderful as it was—wasn’t as important as what I felt when I just looked at her eyes and thought about having her close to me. Having her lie down next to me meant more than almost anything else in the world. It wasn’t what I was once told was important, but now I knew those perceptions were wrong.

“There’s a divinity that shapes our ends, rough-hew them how we will,” I whispered.

“What’s that from?” Rumple asked.

“
Hamlet
,” I replied simply.

Drawing my hands slowly up her sides and around to the front, I wrapped my fingers around the sides of her breasts as I brushed my thumbs over her nipples. They both hardened and puckered, the little nubs pointing straight at me.

I didn’t need any further encouragement.

I rose off the pillow and took the first nipple into my mouth. I circled it with my tongue slowly as I sucked and kissed at the first one then moved over to the second one to make sure it got equal attention. I mean, I didn’t want any inter-titty rivalry going on, did I? My nose nuzzled them equally, and my lips nipped at them as I thought about that for a minute. If they got mad at each other, would they fight? I wondered what that would look like but had to stop because the mental imagery was distracting me from the actual imagery.

Playing around with Nicole’s tits definitely could have occupied my mind, hands, and tongue for a very, very long time. The skin was soft and creamy—just slightly paler than the skin of her arms and shoulders. Her nipples were dark, rosy pink, and just the right size for me to suck into my mouth and feel the texture with the tip of my tongue.