On the Dog (5 page)

An instant later, it was above them. Its claws gripped the tops of the dog hairs. Above the claws, six long legs bristled with sharp hairs.

One by one, the legs slipped down to Harley’s skin. Andrew and Judy ran. But one of the legs caught the belts that held them together. They were trapped!

Andrew looked up. A huge armored creature towered over them. Pointy hairs stuck out all over its body. A snout hung down in front. It was a sharp, prickly snout!
Above the snout were two black cannonball eyes.

meep …
“Flea!” Thudd said. “Flea not see Drewd and Judy. Flea not see much. But flea feel living thing move. Flea jump on! Flea need blood to live.”

The flea lowered its needle-sharp snout-mouth to Harley’s skin. Andrew and Judy yanked at their belts, trying to get free.

Maybe the flea felt something. Instead of biting Harley it jumped! Up and up they went! Andrew had the feeling in his stomach that he got when an airplane took off.

The wind whooshed by their faces. It was scary to see how high they were!

meep …
“If human jump like flea, human jump six hundred feet high!” Thudd squeaked.

Then they were zooming down, down, down! They could see the top of Harley’s head and the furry brown hilltops of his ears.

“Hold on, Andrew!” screamed Judy. “We’re going to crash!”

The flea landed on top of Harley’s head. Andrew and Judy were jolted loose from the flea’s leg. They tumbled down through the hairs to Harley’s skin.

A dark shadow passed over them as the flea crept along the hairs above.

“Let’s head for Harley’s ear,” said Judy. “It’s high, so we can look around. And if anything nasty comes along, we can hide inside. I’ll bet it’s like a big cave in there.”

Judy and Andrew trudged through the dog hair. Suddenly Andrew felt like he was on an elevator going up! Harley wasn’t sleeping anymore. He was on the move. And so were his ears!

Harley’s ears were going up like enormous furry tents!

“What’s going on?” asked Andrew, looking up through the dog hairs.

meep …
“Harley move ears to find where sound come from,” said Thudd. “Dog ears like antennas.”

Andrew listened. The only sound he heard was the Atom Sucker. It was whistling softly.

meep …
“Harley hear something coming,” said Thudd. “Dog ears hear better
than Drewd ears. Human use mostly eyes to find out things. Dog use mostly nose and ears. Dog eyes see things blurry. See just yellow, blue, gray.”

“Grrrrr!”
Harley growled.

“I wonder what he’s growling about,” said Andrew. “If I climb to the tip of a hair, maybe I can see what’s going on.”

Andrew unbuckled the belts that held them together.

The scales on the hair made it easy to climb.

From the top of Harley’s head, Andrew saw a strange sight. The forest of hair on the back of Harley’s neck was standing straight up!

meep …
“Harley scared!” Thudd said. “Muscles in skin make hair stick out. Happen to humans, too. Called goose bumps! Lotsa hair make animal look big, look scary! But humans not got enough hair to look scary.”

“I think I see what Harley’s growling at!” Andrew shouted down to Judy. “A very long puppy just came up to the fence.”

“That must be Hot Dog!” Judy shouted up. “He just moved in with the Greenes across the street from us. They’re
so
nice, especially Josh. His birthday is two days before mine.”

A dreamy smile stretched across Judy’s face.

“Now Hot Dog is sniffing the fence!”
yelled Andrew. “You know, where Harley always pees.”

meep …
“Harley smell on fence tell all about Harley to other dogs,” said Thudd. “Smell tell if Harley male or female. Tell if Harley boss dog or shy dog.”

Harley kept growling. He hunched down low to the ground and crept toward the puppy.

“Harley is right in front of Hot Dog now,” said Andrew. “He’s putting one of his front paws on Hot Dog’s shoulder.”

meep …
“Harley say he boss dog,” said Thudd.

“Now Hot Dog is rolling over on his back,” Andrew reported.

meep …
“Hot Dog agree. Harley boss dog,” said Thudd.

Harley started wagging his tail. Hot Dog got up and wagged his tail, too.

meep …
“Dogs need to know who boss,”
said Thudd. “Hot Dog and Harley friends now.”

The hairs on Harley’s neck leaned back down again.

As Andrew climbed down the hair to Harley’s skin, a shadow fluttered overhead.

It was an orange-and-black butterfly. Harley and Hot Dog trotted after it.

“Yuck!” said Judy. “Something smells gross.”

“It’s probably the garbage bag by the porch,” said Andrew. “I saw Harley sniffing it.”

“Oh, no!” cried Judy. “We’ve got to get into Harley’s ear right away!”

They ran. Andrew slipped on an oily patch. He almost fell into a hair follicle. They were still far away from the huge flaps of Harley’s ears when it happened.

“Holy moly!” said Andrew. Harley was diving like a roller coaster. Andrew and Judy grabbed a dog hair and hung on.

Then the roller coaster turned into the worst kind of water ride. Blobs of slimy eggs rained down on them. Boulders of stinky cheese flew through the air. Andrew and Judy nearly drowned in a glob of sour milk.

“I
knew
this was going to happen!” said Judy. “Harley loves to get into garbage bags. He rolls around in all the yucky stuff!”

“Why would Harley do a dumb thing like that?” asked Andrew.

meep …
“Not dumb,” said Thudd. “Long ago, dogs live wild. Dog need to hunt other animals. But other animals smell dog and run away. Dog roll in stinky stuff. Stinky stuff hide doggie smell. Now dog get food from food bowl, but dog still roll in stinky stuff.”

“What on earth is going on?” boomed a woman’s voice. “Harley! Get over here!”

“It’s Mrs. Scuttle!” Judy gasped.

“You bad dog!” yelled Mrs. Scuttle. “You’re filthy! And what a stink!”

Mrs. Scuttle got quiet for a moment. “Where’s that whistling coming from?” she said. “And what is
that
thing?”

“Oh my gosh!” said Judy. “She must have seen the Atom Sucker!”

“I hope she doesn’t turn it off!” said Andrew.

“Another noisy gadget,” snorted Mrs. Scuttle. “We’ve got to get those Dubbles out of the neighborhood.”

Andrew chuckled. “If Mrs. Scuttle gets close to the Atom Sucker, she could end up in
our
neighborhood.”

Judy laughed. “I’d rather have an eyelash mite for a neighbor.”

Mrs. Scuttle’s hand zoomed down and grabbed Harley’s collar.

“Ooooow!”
Harley whined.

“We have to get inside Harley’s ear!” said
Judy. “Before we drown in Mrs. Scuttle’s bathtub.”

Dog hair by dog hair, they pulled themselves onto Harley’s ear. But the ear was flapping like a giant rubbery flag. They couldn’t get inside.

Mrs. Scuttle dragged Harley to her house. She battled him up the stairs and into the bathroom. The bathroom was as white as an igloo, except for the shower curtain. It was blue and had mermaids and pirate ships all over it.

“What time is it, Thudd?” Andrew asked.

meep …
“1:57,” said Thudd.

Judy and Andrew watched Mrs. Scuttle slide the shower curtain open and turn on the faucet.

“Thudd, did you hear anything from Uncle Al yet?” Andrew asked.

meep …
“Noop,” said Thudd.

Water roared into the tub.

“Sounds like Niagara Falls,” said Andrew.

Mrs. Scuttle poured something into the water. Hot steam curled up into the room.

“Get in there, Harley!” Mrs. Scuttle thundered. Judy and Andrew hung on as Mrs. Scuttle pushed Harley over the edge of the tub.

meep …
“Drewd!” called Thudd from Andrew’s shirt pocket. “If Thudd get washed down drain, Thudd want to say Drewd been good friend. Thunkoo.”

Sploosh!

Harley tumbled into the tub. An ocean of sudsy water rushed toward them.

I can’t believe we’re going to get washed down a drain like an old scab,
thought Andrew.
Wait a minute….

Andrew reached into his front pocket. What he was looking for wasn’t there.

I was pretty sure I had some,
he thought.
Could it be in my back pocket? Yes!

Andrew felt a small cube wrapped in paper.

Now we’ve got a chance!

TO BE CONTINUED IN
Andrew Lost in the Bathroom!