Operation: Endurance (When the Mission Ends) (31 page)

His hand reached across and tucked under her chin. “Look at me, Butterfly.”

When she met his gaze, his eyes brimmed with tears, too. She began to sob and he pulled her into his embrace. “I’m so sorry.” He smoothed the back of her hair while he comforted her. “I’m sorry I wasn’t here and you had to go through that by yourself.” He pulled away from her to look her in the eye. The tears in his eyes silently slipped down his cheeks and she began to kiss him.

It was a kiss of shared hurt and shared loss and shared love. Julie knew this was the way it was supposed to be, her and Chris together.

After they made love, they lay on the blanket looking up into the cottonwoods with their hands entwined. Chris ran his hand up and down her bare arm, but then leaned up. “You said the baby was a girl. Isn’t that too early to tell?” Pain etched his features and furrowed his brow, but he’d just found out about Nalia so it was understandable that he wanted answers even if they hurt.

“Do you remember when I woke up in the hospital?”

He nodded.

“When I’d been asleep or whatever I was during that time, I saw Aaron.”

Chris nodded tentatively. “Yes, you said that.”

“What I didn’t tell you is that our little girl,
Nalia, was with him.”

Chris’s muscles tensed, but Julie told him the rest of what happened when she saw Aaron and
Nalia. When she finished, she was emotionally exhausted. Chris seemed close to the same, but something about their shared grief created a stronger bond between them. They made slow, beautiful love one more time beneath the falling cottonwood blossoms and to Julie, it seemed the perfect tribute to their baby girl and the man now taking care of her. Finally, they had full honesty between them. They could move forward now.

Chris wrapped his hands around Julie’s waist and pulled her flush up against him, so he could whisper in her ear. “Why are you so nervous?”

They stood in front of Cassie and Jake’s house for dinner, but hadn’t knocked yet. Right now, he was more concerned about Julie. Ever since Cassie had called that afternoon to ask them to dinner, she’d been fidgety and he didn’t understand why. She didn’t answer him, so he turned her around. She was definitely nervous about something, but that didn’t make sense. Julie and Cassie were best friends.

“What’s going on, Butterfly?”

Julie glanced nervously at the house and then pulled Chris back to the truck. “Maybe we should wait to tell them about us.”

Chris forgot to breathe. Not telling Cassie about them had cost them the last year and so much more emotional turmoil. Why would Julie want to hide their relationship now? That just didn’t make any sense. “Why? I thought what we had going here was something real and significant.”

“It is, Chris, but that doesn’t mean Cassie will see it that way.”

“She’s one of your best friends and my twin sister. Why wouldn’t she be thrilled for us?” He really didn’t understand the way a woman’s minds worked. This made no sense.

“She wasn’t happy about Penelope and Colton at first. I know that’s changed since, but she’s your twin sister and protective of you. Things are good right now between us. I’m just afraid that something’s going to mess that up. Let’s face it. We don’t have the luckiest of track records.” She chewed on her lip as she looked at the front of the house.

He gently kissed her forehead. He had to admit he had some of the same fears. Not about Cassie, obviously. She was his twin sister and he was pretty sure she was going to be thrilled. But he did share Julie’s concern about something ruining this for them. Everything was so fragile between them right now. He couldn’t lose her again.

“All Cassie wants is for me to be happy. You’re a huge part of that for me and she’ll see that. I promise you, there’s nothing to worry about here. She loves you and she loves me. She’s going to love that we’re together.”

He reached for her hand and tugged her toward him so he could lean down and kiss her. It was meant to be a gentle, sweet kiss, but when he tasted her, he couldn’t resist. Licking the crease of her lips, she quickly opened her mouth and drew him in, her tongue tangling with his like she may never get this chance again. He pulled her taut up against him and his cock hardened to the point of pain even though they’d just made love a few hours ago. He couldn’t imagine ever having enough of her.

The sound of a throat clearing sounded out over the yard and Julie stiffened within his arms. He didn’t let go of her, knowing who stood behind them. Instead, he whispered into her ear, “It’s okay, Butterfly. Trust me.”

He turned his head to see the smirk on his twin’s face.

“Hey, Cass,” he called out over the yard. He continued to hold Julie pressed up against the truck and wondered if Cassie would allow them a few minutes so that he might have the slightest chance of getting his erection under control.

He met Julie’s stricken gaze and pressed his hips against hers. “You wouldn’t want to give me a list of something really boring to help me get rid of this before Cassie notices it, would you?”

As Julie looked down toward the bulge in his jeans, he was happy to see a hint of amusement take over her face rather than the worry that had been there.

The corners of her lips twitched as she told him, “Sorry, I’ve already used my three for today.”

“You can only make three lists a day?” Okay, that was unexpected.

She nodded, but glanced over his shoulder. “Um, your sister’s coming.”

He closed his eyes for a moment before turning, placing Julie in front of him as he did so, just to hide any further humiliation. It was one thing to let Cassie know they were dating but she sure as hell didn’t need to see the evidence of his erection.

Cassie stopped about five feet away, crossed her arms, and cocked her hip while she looked at them with amusement. “I think you two must have some news to share with me, huh?”

He chuckled. “You can’t even wait until we get in the door?”

“Well, I wasn’t the one with the huge public display of affection out in the front yard. My poor neighbors are probably traumatized.”

Chris could see the red creeping up the back of Julie’s neck. He was going to kill Cassie. “I’m sure they’ve seen worse with you and Jake,” he replied drily as he rubbed Julie’s shoulder. “Speaking of Jake, where is he?”

“He’s out back, cooking on the grill. Come on in and we’ll go join him, then I need to hear how all this happened.” She looked curiously at the two of them, but then reached and pulled Julie out of his arms and into hers. “Girlfriend, you’ve been holding out on me, but that’s okay. Since it’s my brother, I can forgive that.”

He smiled behind them. It was going to be okay.

* * *

A couple of hours later, Julie settled back against the heat of Chris’s chest on the lounge chair. They sat outdoors on Cassie’s terrace patio, enjoying the warmth of the evening and an after-dinner glass of wine.

“Since it looks like you all have been wrapped up in each other all weekend,” Cassie began, “then you probably haven’t heard the latest, have you?”

Julie frowned. “The latest on what?”

“The powers that be in the police department finally had to issue a public statement about the rapist. He’s now considered a serial killer. The last two victims they’ve found have been dead.”

A chill rolled down her spine. “This is awful. Do they have any leads yet? I can’t believe they let it go this long before announcing it. Did they say how many attacks there have been from this guy in total?”

Cassie pursed her lips and shook her head. “No, they aren’t admitting for sure that it’s the same guy. They simply said they think the two killings may be linked to a rash of rapes in the area, but they wouldn’t even confirm that for sure. The city officials are trying to cover their asses.”

Jake threaded his fingers through Cassie’s. “I know it’s selfish of me, but I’m happy you aren’t teaching the summer sessions this year, Cassie. With the college campus, there are too many women around for him to pick from. They’ve got to catch this guy.”

“Those poor girls. Can you imagine how terrifying that would be?” Julie had come close to that scenario once in her life. That’s why she trained so hard with her self-defense classes. “Thank goodness, I’m feeling well enough to go back to work and start my classes again.”

Chris leaned around to look at her. “I knew you were going back to work tomorrow, but I didn’t realize your self-defense classes were starting back up again, too. Are you sure you’re feeling up to that? I know your lungs aren’t completely healed yet.”

“It’s okay. Pete and the guys will cover for me where I may be physically lacking, but it’s too important for me not to be there, especially right now.”

If she could help one woman defend herself against this guy or a creep like him then every single one of her classes would be worth it.

Monday morning. Julie hadn’t been to work in two weeks, and normally she wouldn’t be here this morning, either, since it was Memorial Day. But the rest of the physical therapy department had worked too hard to cover for her already. She figured the least she could do was come in and begin clearing some of the backlog of paperwork.

Today was going to be the real test for her OCD. Only three lists. Already this morning, she kept finding herself beginning them mentally. She knew it was just nerves and stress, knowing how much work she’d have to catch up on. When the need arose, she’d just have to continue to use Dr. Eckert’s method and talk through why she needed to make a list. Knowing she used the lists as a crutch helped her to work through the emotions causing her stress.

But knowing that didn’t help the twitching need in her fingers for a pen and paper when she spotted Dr. Shelby in her doorway scowling at her. “What are you doing here?”

“Um, working? I called Melody last week and let her know I’d be back in today.”

He ran a hand through his hair and looked frustrated, but she wasn’t sure if she was the source of that frustration or not. He closed his eyes for a moment and then refocused on her. “Are you okay? Are you sure you’re ready to be back at work?”

“I’m feeling good. Really, I’ve done almost nothing but sleep for the last two weeks and my recovery is showing it. I promise you, I’m much better than before.”

He studied her until she began to feel self-conscious. “There does seem to be something about you,” he mused. “Something else has changed besides your health. What did you do?”

She straightened her spine. “I asked for help. I’m seeing a therapist.”

A smile spread across his face.  “Good. That’s really good. Don’t expect miracles. You’ll have some setbacks, but I’m proud of you. That first step is always the hardest.”

And just like that the ball in her stomach dissipated. “Thank you, sir.”

He gave a quick glance toward the stack of files she was working on. “Well, I’ll let you get back to it then, but don’t exhaust yourself. If you need to go home early this week, do so. We
need to keep you healthy from now on.” He stepped out of the room, but then leaned back in with a questioning gaze. “If you don’t mind my asking, who are you seeing?”

“Dr. Bart Eckert. I have a standing appointment with him on Friday’s, but I had Melody clear my schedule so that I’m only out of the office during my lunch break.”

“That’s fine. I’ve heard good things about him. He was a good choice.”

* * *

By late that afternoon, Julie was admittedly drooping energy-wise, so she headed down to the hospital coffee shop. She’d been digging through her purse as she stood in line for change when the man in front of her put his hands over hers and told her, “Don’t worry about it. I already paid for it. A venti mocha, right?”

She looked up into his weary blue eyes. “Brian! I’m so sorry. I didn’t even notice you standing in front of me. I must need the caffeine more than I thought I did. Thank you.”

They slid down the counter to wait for their drinks and Julie couldn’t help noticing the lines of fatigue on Brian’s face. “You look exhausted. Are you okay?”

He rubbed his hand over his face and grimaced. “Yeah, I have to admit I could use about twenty straight hours of sleep at this point, but it’s probably not going to happen.”

She knew he was working the rapist case, which with the escalation of that suspect to serial killer, probably just meant more pressure from the higher ups in his department. Poor Brian. It seemed like he was constantly overworked. “Do you ever think about quitting? You know, go do a job where you could live a normal life?” The barista handed them their drinks and they sat down at a little table together to chat.

He gave a dry, humorless chuckle. “Only every other day, but this is my job and it’s important, even if it’s rough a lot of the time. Someday I’ll probably have to make a choice between a life and the job, but right now, this is all I have so I’m okay doing it.”

And that was just sad. She’d forgotten the vow she’d made at the wedding to find someone for Brian. He deserved so much more than this half-life that would burn him out within the next five years. He needed something more.