Out of Chances (16 page)

‘Thanks for the heads-up. I'll have a chat to Kirsten and see how she feels.'

Dan nodded. Ed's sister had only been dating Gemma for a few months; she may not be ready for this. A small part of him hoped Lisa wouldn't do it … but the rest of him knew she had her eyes firmly on his father's wallet.

There had been a freeze in their friendship since Indigo had refused to go out with Maddy and be the sure thing. Which had meant that seeing her at work had been more than a little awkward.

Today, though, Maddy was all smiles. ‘Did you want to come out this weekend?'

Usually she'd say yes, but her sister would be gone and she'd have the flat to herself. It would be bliss even though she'd probably be spending the weekend cleaning. Yay.

However she didn't want to say no outright, not again. ‘I dunno, to do what?'

‘Dinner, movies …'

‘Is this another attempt to set me up?' She really didn't need that right now. Dan had texted her twice. The first time to apologise, he knew what he'd done was stupid. She was glad that he'd accepted that. The second time to see if she wanted to go out tomorrow.

Who went out on a Tuesday night?

He did, apparently.

She'd said no. They weren't dating and she wasn't going clubbing. However, now she was thinking that her one word text might have been a bit harsh. She still wanted to see him. At least, she thought she did, but he was in the middle of a mess and she didn't want to be part of it. That was mean. If she liked him then she should be willing to be there for the bad as well as the good and there was good. Lots of good.

This was why she didn't like relationships. They were messy.

Give it a few days, then call him on Thursday to see if he wants a hook-up.

She had to play it cool and keep control. Keep a safe zone between them. But she knew she was holding fire every time she was with him. Each time she saw him she was closer to getting burned.

‘Oh come on, you'll like him. You can't keep serial dating forever.' Maddy had a drink of water.

Indigo didn't see why not, but that argument never got anywhere with Maddy. She liked to see everyone all paired up and Indigo was an anomaly.

‘I'm kind of seeing someone.' It wasn't a total lie as she was kind of seeing Dan. It was no longer a one-night fling to scratch an itch and jump into a rock star's bed. It had been several weeks of seeing him on and off. That was almost the longest she'd ever seen anyone.

‘You're lying.' Maddy crossed her arms

Indigo shook her head. ‘Nope … I picked him up a few weeks ago and we've had several sleepovers.' She was about to add that he'd taken her to the ballet as a VIP, but she didn't want to share that night. It was too special. Like a glass Christmas tree ornament that was only brought out once a year. She didn't want it to get tarnished or broken. Even if she never saw him again, he had left an impact on her life and there would be a crater that no one would ever be able to fill.

‘Why didn't you say anything? We can all get together. It will be fun!'

Like sticking pins in her eyes. ‘I don't think we're ready for that. It's a low pressure kind of thing.'

Maddy frowned. ‘He's using you for sex? Is he married?'

‘No … I would never be that woman. Never.' The idea was horrifying. She was sure the women her father saw on the side knew full well he was a cheating dog but they didn't care. She hated them for being available and making it easy.

‘Does he have a name, are there pictures?' Maddy pressed.

‘Do you think I'm making him up?'

‘Honestly? Yes.'

Indigo checked her watch. ‘I have a class to teach.'

But the idea was already there … it would be nice to go out with Dan again and prove Maddy wrong. What was she thinking? She was rebound girl while he recovered from his horrid ex. He was using her for sex … he'd rung her when he'd needed help.

Because he'd been done for DUI.

He was turning out to be like the guys she'd known back home. Drinking and fun and as long as they were getting what they wanted. The moment that stopped they were moving on. He didn't care about her.

He'd invited her out tomorrow.

She could've said yes. It was so tempting to text him and say she'd changed her mind and she would like to see him. When she was with him everything was fine, but as soon as she was out of his bed, all the doubts flooded back.

She didn't know what she was doing anymore. Was Maddy right? In ten years' time she'd be desperate and alone?

As much as she didn't want to be alone, she didn't want to be with someone just so she didn't have to be by herself.

Maybe this was where what she had with Dan ended. Had she already made that decision by not staying over after his DUI? It didn't feel over. She didn't know what it was anymore, only that she wasn't ready to meet his friends. That would imply that she was ready to up the stakes and she wasn't.

He'd have fun without her … although hopefully not that much fun.

Chapter 13

Despite what Gemma had said, Dan was worried. Going out with Ripley probably wasn't a wise move if Lisa was looking to make trouble. But he wasn't going to cancel—it was hard enough to catch up with Ripley as it was. And he really wanted a big night out so he could forget about Lisa and Indigo.

He hadn't expected that to crash and burn so fast.

It was as though she didn't want to know him. She'd got what she wanted and moved on because he was an idiot. He wished he hadn't called her and he'd just walked home, then she wouldn't be brushing him off.

Whatever, he didn't need anyone, he would get by.

Ripley handed him a roll of fifty-dollar notes when they met at the hotel bar in Perth. ‘Think of it as repayment.'

Dan was very relieved to see that Ripley was on his own. He really couldn't have handled a group of exuberant dancers, or ex-high school buddies, tonight.

‘I never kept track.' Dan had funded a lot of their escapades because he had the money. His family always had the money. Dan shoved the notes into his wallet. He hadn't driven. One run-in with the cops was enough. He'd been careless, but he wasn't stupid.

‘Neither did I, but I did resent it at times. Kind of a weird resentment-gratitude thing.'

‘Yeah, I'm feeling it.' And Dan wasn't sure that he liked it. ‘So where are we going?'

‘Northbridge for food and dancing.'

‘No gay bar.' It would be just his luck to be seen. Since when did he care? It had never bothered him before. He was becoming paranoid and that wasn't him. Lisa was still whispering in his ear and he didn't like it at all. He needed to break that chain.

‘Dude … I'm single,' Ripley pleaded, hands in prayer.

‘So am I.'

‘What happened to the pretty redhead?'

Then Dan had to tell the whole story. All of it. ‘I'm pretty sure I'm now living in some hellish soap opera that would be funny if it weren't real.'

‘Nah. If it was a soap opera Lisa would be having an affair with your father and you secretly would be gay and you'd wake up in my bed.'

Dan stared at Ripley then shook his head. ‘Okay, you really do need to get laid if you are looking at me like that.'

‘Oh, please. I can do better,' he said with a smile.

‘Now you're kicking me while I'm down? Remind me why I'm your friend?'

‘Because I will always haul your ass out of the fire and you would do the same for me. You don't fuck your friends unless you want to lose them.' Ripley finished his light beer. ‘I got an email from Nate … unofficially he likes your work.' Ripley grinned and put his arm around Dan's shoulders. ‘Now let's go and waste my money and find some other desperate and lonely people to screw.'

The tension that had been squeezing him for the last couple of days eased a fraction. Selling some songs was exactly the kind of good news that he needed—not that it had happened yet. ‘Food first.'

‘Yes … I hadn't forgotten.'

Ripley totally had. He could get very sidetracked, although he called it focused. Trouble was Dan knew exactly what that was like.

After eating a pile of cheap noodles and washing them down with more beer, they ended up in a club that was playing noise that passed for music, more beat than melody and even less lyrics. Not Dan's thing at all. Even if he was well on the way to passing out. He'd drunk too much over the last four hours. He knew it for sure this time.

And he was going to regret it come morning. However, tonight he just wanted to put everything else aside. He'd deal with tomorrow tomorrow.

Ripley had mastered the art of looking like he was drinking and getting drunk without actually doing anything. And he was fun. Dancing with anyone who wanted him. Did any of the women realise or did they just like the fact that he was tall and moved well? Dan finished his water—he could drink a swimming pool and it wouldn't stop the hangover from arriving—and moved back onto the floor and into the gaggle of people that had formed around Ripley.

Some things didn't change; the man was still a magnet. Going out with him meant having fun without being in the spotlight. That suited Dan fine.

The girl Dan was dancing with shimmied a little too close, almost humping his leg.

Maybe he wasn't drunk enough to find that appealing. She smiled and fluttered her lashes. He drew back, needing some breathing space. That wasn't what he was here for. While Ripley might be looking to hook-up, Dan was happy to just be out.

Her friends said something to her and she moved in again. Her breasts pressed against him as she put her arms around his neck. ‘Hey, are you from that band Selling the Sun?'

Dan nodded, then as her eyes lit up he kind of wished that he'd said no. The woman bounced up and down and then whipped out her phone. ‘Can I get a selfie?'

He smiled and did what was expected as her friend took the picture. Usually this part was fun. Usually there was someone else to take the heat like Ed or Mike. Mike was good at this shit. Ed seemed to even enjoy it.

‘Where's the rest of the band?' Her hands were on him.

‘Not here.' He had to be close to her to hear and be heard. He wanted to pull away.

‘Cool. So you're all mine.' She plastered herself to him, her hands moving over him, grabbing his ass.

In the flashing lights she looked pretty enough. She wasn't Indigo though … Indigo. His heart ached at the way she'd brushed his peace offerings aside. He'd well and truly blown it with her. The young woman ground against him. He wasn't drunk enough that his body didn't respond. This seemed like a good way to forget about everything for a few minutes. He danced with her and let her hands wander.

Her hand slid up his inner thigh, there was a dare in her eyes. ‘Let's ditch my friends.'

His heart pulsed louder than the music.
Say no, walk away.
But that wasn't what he said. ‘Where?'

Ripley was here to find someone and get laid. He might as well take advantage. It didn't matter what he did now, his life couldn't get more fucked up. A few nameless one-night stands might be what he needed. It would certainly piss Lisa off and prove her lies wrong.

‘There's has to be somewhere out of the way …' She took his hand and led him through the club. Up the stairs to where there was less dancing and more groping. She tugged him to a corner that wasn't nearly as private as he'd have liked, then dropped to her knees.

Shit that was unexpected … he glanced around but no one was looking at them hidden in the shadows. She undid his fly. He was half hard at the idea of a random head job. Half absolutely terrified of getting busted. Adrenaline and nerves were more intoxicating than alcohol. Her mouth was hot on his dick.

Oh, fuck this was happening.

He watched as she licked and sucked him. And he didn't feel a thing. He felt her touch, her hand and her tongue. But there was no lust. He didn't want her. She glanced up as if seeking approval.

‘Maybe this isn't …' He started to pull away. Now he couldn't even enjoy getting sucked. He was officially broken.

‘Jesus, man. Thought I'd lost you.' Ripley put a hand on his shoulder.

The girl released him. ‘What's going on?'

‘I'm taking my
very
drunk friend home and you are going back to your friends.' Ripley smiled as though everything was perfect.

For a moment Dan wanted to argue, but he didn't want her. She could have sucked all night and he probably wouldn't have come. He tucked his softening dick away. His stomach turned and the room became hot. He needed the bathroom.

He broke away from Ripley and the woman and stumbled to the mens.

Dan shut the cubicle door and threw up. The acid burned this throat and for several seconds all he could do was breath as his stomach turned over. The room smelled of urine and his guts clenched again. He might be pretty well pissed but this wasn't where he'd wanted to end up. He pushed his fingers through his hair. When had his life ended up in the toilet? He had everything. And he was flushing it away. He shivered, cold and sweaty. He couldn't stay here. When he figured he wasn't going to be ill again, he flushed and cleaned himself up, splashing water on his face while avoiding looking at himself in the mirror. He couldn't.

He wanted a shower. He wanted to go back about four hours and just have fun and dance instead of trying to drink as much as possible. He should've said no to her. Told her he wasn't interested—was he that desperate for attention?

Apparently so.

The bathroom door opened. Ripley, looking unimpressed. ‘I'm making sure you're alive.'

‘Yeah. I think I'm done.' It would be easier to be dead. It would hurt less.

‘I think you are too.' Ripley held the door open. The music was too loud and the lights too colourful.