Read Out Of The Shadows Online
Authors: Julia Davies
“Hang on, you said ‘he.’ You did, didn’t you?”
“Y-yes, I did.” He turned to look down at his feet again.
“Who is it?”
“Me,” Jai told them. He smiled at Dane, going to him, taking his mate’s hand as Sasha backed off. “Dane and I are mates.”
A silence fell over the group as the guards turned to stare at Jai.
Ret was the first to speak. “Well, congratulations. I can’t believe you kept it hidden for this long.”
Once the others finished their congratulations and questions, Jai turned to Dane, looking into his eyes, searching.
“Did you mean that?” he asked quietly. “When you said you loved me.”
Dane nodded. “I know we haven’t been together for long, but I meant it. I love you.”
Jai smiled, cupping Dane’s face in his palm. “Good, because I love you, too. I have for a long time, but I didn’t want to scare you away if I said anything.”
Dane kissed him then, only belatedly realising that they were not alone in the office. He glanced at their audience from the corner of his eye and groaned, burying his face against Jai’s shoulder.
“So I presume that your parents don’t know about you two,” Ret said.
“Don’t even know I’m gay,” Dane said miserably.
Sasha shook her head. “They will soon, thanks to me.”
“Let’s just say that I don’t expect them to be happy about it,” Dane added.
* * * *
That afternoon, when Dane got to his flat, Sasha and his mum and dad were already waiting. Sasha had left them in the living room whilst she came out to meet Dane and warn him. She smiled at Jai as he climbed off his bike.
They went into the small kitchen and dropped off motorcycle helmets and jackets. Jai could see that Dane was on the verge of turning and walking back out of the door and sat him down at the kitchen table, staying close by.
“Dane, I have another confession to make,” Sasha said. “I told Mum about Jai. She’s fine about it.”
“Has she told Dad?”
“No,” Sasha admitted.
Just then a tall, blonde-haired woman came into the kitchen. She bore a striking resemblance to both siblings.
“Hello, love. Sasha, why don’t you go and keep your dad company for a minute,” she suggested.
In other words, sidetrack him whilst your brother stops panicking
, Dane thought as she went into the living room.
“I am sorry for showing up like this,” she said, “but your dad overheard Sasha and me talking. He’s so excited that you’ve found your mate.”
Dane managed to stop hyperventilating, even though he couldn’t keep his hands from shaking, and glanced at his mother. “Not when he finds out who it is,” he said. “He’s going to make a scene, I know he is.” He saw his mum glance at Jai.
“Sorry. Jai, this is my mum, Dee.”
Jai stood. “Mrs Bryant, I’m Jai Hanson. It’s nice to meet you.”
“Please, call me Dee,” she told him as she shook his hand and then changed her mind and hugged him. “So, you are my son’s mate; Sasha speaks very highly of you.”
Dane frowned at his mum. “Why aren’t you angry?”
“Why would I be, love? Because you’re gay?” His mum shook her head. “If I’m being honest, it’s not as much of a surprise as you were expecting. At least, not to me. I did wonder sometimes, but I figured that you would tell me in your own time.”
“You knew?”
“Well, I suspected.” She smiled.
She glanced down at Dane. “You can’t just keep avoiding your dad forever.” Dane looked defeated as she said softly, “You have to tell him before he finds out from someone else.”
Dane reluctantly followed his mother out to the living room, keeping a tight grip on Jai’s hand until he reached the door. He let go then, knowing that if he went in holding onto Jai, his dad would probably make even more of a fuss.
“There you are, son. I thought you’d forgotten about us.”
Dane could feel the panic rising again as his dad stood up from his chair and strode over to greet his son.
“Sorry, Dad.”
His dad glanced at Jai, who stood in the doorway, leaning on the doorframe.
“I thought we could come and surprise you,” he said, “and also meet your young lady. How come you didn’t tell me that you’d found your mate?”
As Dane remained silent, his dad continued, oblivious.
“So, what’s her name? What’s she like?”
Dane knew he shouldn’t be this scared of his dad; he’d come out to the rest of the guard and to his sister, but his dad was a different matter. He could feel his throat tightening as he struggled for breath. He fought to keep his feet in place but eventually, he lost.
“I can’t do this,” he muttered as he turned and fled the room, pushing past his mum. “I can’t.”
* * * *
Jai hurried out after him, seeing the confusion on Dane’s dad’s face. He found Dane in his bedroom, sitting on the floor, back against the wall. He had his knees against his chest, arms hugging them as he gulped in breaths. He looked up as Jai came in.
“I couldn’t tell him. It was all I could do just to get air into my lungs.”
Jai knelt down next to him and took his hand, seeing the panic receding a little. He reached out and pulled Dane close, wrapping his arm around him and hating the fact that this was one fear he couldn’t take away. He wasn’t sure how long they sat there in silence, but the sound of the door opening made them both look up.
“Dane, are you in here?” They heard his dad’s voice a fraction of a second before he came through the door, followed by his mum telling him not to “just go barging in.”
“What are you playing at, lad? And just who are you?” he demanded of Jai. “You were there earlier, too. Well?” He sighed, annoyed. “If you aren’t going to say anything, I’ll be outside.”
He tried to leave, but his wife kicked the door closed and stood in front of it.
“Dee?”
“Gil, you and Dane need to talk and you aren’t leaving until you do.”
Jai hopped nimbly to his feet and held out a hand to help Dane up as Gil sat on the corner of the bed.
“Well, son, what do we need to talk about? Is there something about this lass you don’t want us to know?”
* * * *
Well, it’s now or never
.
“There is no lass,” Dane told him.
His dad gave him an exasperated look. “You said you’d found your mate.”
When Jai moved, Dane’s dad glared at him, obviously trying to give him the hint that this was a private conversation and to leave.
“He stays,” Dane said, taking a deep breath to muster the courage he needed. His mum cast him an encouraging nod. “Dad, this is Jai. He’s my boyfriend, and my mate.”
“Stop it now, son. It’s not funny.”
Dane stepped back to take Jai’s hand. “I’m not joking. I’m gay, I have been for a long time.”
“I’m not going to sit and listen to this,” Gil said, standing. “I raised you right, boy, and you expect me to stand by and watch you make a fool of yourself? It’s disgraceful, not to mention humiliating. You’re coming back with us, away from this place and
him
. You should be ashamed of yourself,” he told Jai. “I suppose it was you who brainwashed my son?”
“Dad, stop it. Apologise to him; you don’t talk to him like that.”
“Apologise? Why should I apologise to him after he twisted up your mind—”
“Dad, just shut up! Do you really want to know the truth? I am happier with Jai than I ever have been.” He saw the disbelieving look on his dad’s face and shook his head. At least his anger was chasing away the fear of talking to his dad. “And you wonder why I avoided telling you for so long. I’m still your son, the same person I was before you found out I had sex with men.”
“And what about Georgina?” his dad demanded.
“Dad, anything between me and her was in your mind,” Dane told him. “Our entire relationship was a sham and both of us knew it. We were friends, nothing more, because I wasn’t interested.”
His dad frowned. “She’s a lovely young lady, and if you had any sense you would come home and beg for her to take you back.”
“Dad, you aren’t listening to me. I. Am. Not. Interested. In. Women.” Dane enunciated every word clearly as though speaking to a small child. He could scream; it was like talking to a brick wall. “I don’t know how I can put this in a way you’ll understand. I sleep with men and I am mated, quite happily, to Jai.”
“I won’t be a part of this,” his dad said, stomping over to the door, and this time Dee moved aside. “You got a choice to make, son. If you continue this charade, I wash my hands of you. Are you really willing to throw away your family because of
him
?”
* * * *
Jai felt his heart sink as Dane let go of his hand and walked slowly towards his dad. He was going to lose the one person who mattered to him more than anything else, and it hurt more than he ever expected it would.
“Dad, please don’t do this.”
Jai could hear the pain in his mate’s voice as he spoke, but his dad was unmoving.
“Then I’m sorry, Dad, but I choose Jai.”
Jai couldn’t believe what he had just heard, thinking he had imagined it, until Dane came back and put his arm around him.
Gil scowled and took his wife’s arm. “Come on, Dee, we’re leaving.”
“No. If you want to go, that’s your choice, but I came here to see Dane.”
His eyes narrowed. “You knew, didn’t you, you and Sasha? And you never told me.”
“It wasn’t our place to say anything,” she retorted. “And given how you reacted when he did, I don’t blame him one bit for keeping it a secret for this long. I thought you were more of a man than this, Gil.”
His dad left, pushing past his daughter as she entered the room.
“Mum, maybe you should go after him,” Dane was saying. “I don’t want to cause you any problems.”
“No, he has to understand that I don’t agree with him about this. I came to see you and to meet Jai.”
She looked up as Sasha came in.
“I gather you told him,” she observed, looking across to where Jai was holding her brother. “It didn’t go too well, huh?”
“My own dad just disowned me and he’s pissed at you both for knowing and not telling him,” Dane said. “He hates me.”
Gil left that same day without even bothering to say goodbye, or saying one more word to his son. Dee decided to stay a while longer, although her husband had made his feelings on that subject perfectly clear. Dane tried to persuade her to go so as not to cause problems between them, but she refused.
“I came here to see you and get to know your mate and I intend to do just that,” Dane’s mum told him. “If your dad wants to behave like a child, then let him.”
When Dane offered to book her into a hotel, she shook her head, instead telling him that she could stay at his flat.
“I assume that you usually spend your nights with Jai?” She laughed at his stunned expression. “Oh, come on, love, I can see that you haven’t been back here in days. Sasha’s going to stay with me, so we’ll give you a bit of peace and quiet.”
“But, Mum…”
Dee hugged her son. “It’s alright. Go.”
Since Sasha was still using Jai’s Jeep, Jai told her to take it with her so that Dane’s mother and sister had some transport and took Dane home. Recently, there had always been Sasha to think of, not that he begrudged her a place to stay. Jai actually liked having her around, but it was nice to get some alone time with his mate. Jai could see that Dane was still thinking about his dad, the sadness in his eyes hadn’t really left since his dad walked out of that room.
“It’ll all work out in the end,” he said softly once he got his mate home, drawing him into his arms.
Dane cast him a disbelieving look. “How do you figure that one? My dad has disowned me.”
“You have your mum and your sister,” Jai pointed out. “And you always have me.”
“I know,” Dane said, pressing his face to the side of Jai’s neck. “Take me to bed, Jai.”
“You’re getting bossy,” Jai teased. “So, who’s Georgina? Should I be jealous?”
Dane’s cheeks pinked. “No.”
“Why, I do believe you’re blushing, babe.” Jai grinned.
Dane made a valiant effort to distract Jai, but his mate was having none of it.
“Stop that,” Jai said, half-heartedly as Dane’s fingers began unbuttoning his jeans. His shirt already lay on the floor behind him. “Come on, who is she?”
“You aren’t going to quit until I tell you, are you?” Dane sighed.
Jai shook his head, his hands working at unfastening Dane’s shirt as his mouth followed his progress down the warm flesh. Pushing the shirt off Dane’s shoulders, he flicked his tongue over one stiff nipple, making Dane hiss in a breath. Dropping to his knees, he began to remove Dane’s jeans, sliding them down over his hips along with his underwear. Once they pooled at his feet, Jai brushed his index finger along the length of Dane’s cock. The hard length twitched at his touch. Jai smiled up at Dane.
“So, you were telling me about Georgina?”
Dane gaped at him, then groaned. “That’s blackmail.”
He reached down to wrap his own hand around his dick but Jai swatted his hands away. Kicking off his own jeans, already unfastened by Dane, he backed his mate toward the sofa. As Dane landed, Jai straddled his legs, hands holding his wrists.
“I can do this all night,” he purred, shifting just enough to press their cocks together before moving away again.
“You’re evil, did anyone ever tell you that? Okay, okay!” Dane relented, managing to get one hand free and slipping it around Jai to pull him closer. “Georgina was my girlfriend.”
Jai looked down into his face, eyes wide with surprise. Dane took advantage of his reaction to wriggle his other hand free.
“She and I were together for nearly two years,” he continued. “I fooled myself into thinking that I could be normal, like everyone expected me to be, only it didn’t work. We may have slept in the same bed, but there was nothing sexual about it for at least the last year or so. How could it be when every time I was with her, I was lying to her? I used to tell her that I was meeting some friends or working late and then go out.” He looked away from Jai’s gaze. “I went back home to her after letting some strange man fuck me and I felt awful for using her.”