Outcome (Aftermath #2) (20 page)

"Call the police!" some kid yelled.

"Oh my God!" More girls screaming. "My parents are gonna kill me!"

"For Christ's sake, dude!" Trent wasn’t laughing anymore. Instead he was backing into a corner as Chase and Andreas advanced. "All this for Remy?"

Landon took down the last guy standing in the way, and then Andreas had his hands around Trent's throat, a murderous look in his eyes.

Trent choked and spluttered. "Up-upstairs, I think."

Chase didn’t stick around. With his heart pounding furiously and his body throbbing from the punches he'd taken, he ran up the stairs and started yanking on doors.

Two kids getting laid in there. A goth chick on the phone in another room. A couple arguing in the hallway. "I saw the way you were looking at her!" Redhead shouted at her boyfriend. Chase passed them and tried another door, but that room was empty. Which left him with the bathrooms.

The first one was locked, and he could hear two girls' moans coming from the other side. Second bathroom was empty. And the third…

Locked. Chase knocked impatiently and peered down the opposite hall with just as many rooms. Rich fuckin' folks had too much space.

"Go away,"
someone groaned. No, not someone; it was Remy. Chase's heart froze.
"Oh, fuck…"
A retching sound followed, which sent Chase into action. He pushed at the door, and when it didn’t budge, he took a step back and kicked at it with all his strength.

It took him three tries before the hinges had loosened enough, and then he was met by the sight of Remy hugging the toilet.

He's alive, at least
. The relief was so immense that Chase could cry.
He's in one piece
. Chase closed the distance between them after filling a glass with water.

Remy stuck two fingers into his mouth and gagged, throwing up again. He hadn't even seen it was Chase yet, and he shoved weakly at Chase as he kneeled down behind Remy.

"No," Remy croaked, slumping down with his forehead touching the toilet seat. "F-fuck off."

"It's me, baby." Chase carefully cupped the back of Remy's neck and rubbed his clammy skin. In response, Remy froze for a beat, but then tremors racked his body and he began crying. "Shhh, I've got you."

"I'm sorry!" Remy's entire body shook as Chase gathered him close. "I'm s-so fucking sorry, Chase…"

Chase didn’t want any apologies. Now that he had Remy in his arms, the fierce protector in him wanted Remy as far away from this place as possible.

Chapter 23

Chase moved on autopilot. Remy had been frantic at first, apologizing and begging Chase not to leave him, but he'd calmed down some now. Maybe after hearing,
"I'll never leave you, Remy."
He'd slumped, defeated, against Chase and accepted water, mouthwash, pain-killers, and a damp towel.

"Let's get outta here," Chase murmured. He pocketed the bottle of pain-killers he'd found in a cabinet and led Remy out of the bathroom and down the stairs. A lot of people lingered, but it was clear that the party was breaking up.

Everything was a blur. Trent's "security" guys had bailed, and Andreas was standing over Trent's injured body, shouting at him, but Chase couldn’t hear a word. He did see the blood on Trent's face, though. He also saw Cam with a menacing look in his eyes, a forearm pressed tightly over the lanky addict's sternum, and a finger pointed in his face. Didn’t take a genius to figure out it was threats spilling out of Cam, not pillow talk.

Chase's ears rang with the chaos going on around him.

The girl who was obviously regretting hosting this party in her parents' house was crying in the arms of a guy. Said guy smirked over her shoulder, nodded at a buddy, and gave a thumbs-up.

Landon was showing a few drunk chicks pictures of his daughters.

"Oh, God…" Remy groaned at the sight of a jock throwing up in a plant.

Chase pressed a brief kiss to Remy's temple, a pinch of amusement tugging at his lips. "Yeah, time to get you out." He glanced over at Andreas and Cam again, only to find them both focusing on him and Remy. Chase couldn’t be bothered to care about Cam's wry smirk. "We're leavin'."

Andreas nodded. It was clear he wanted to approach Remy, but he stayed put. "We're out of here, too." He hesitated, his eyes flicking between Cam and Chase, then spoke again. "I'm guessing you're heading to the cabin?"

Chase hadn't given that a single thought, but it suddenly seemed like the best fuckin' idea ever. Seclusion, privacy—God, yes.

"You have the keys to Minna's truck?" he asked Remy.

Remy rubbed the towel over his forehead and pulled a set of keys from his baggy chinos with a shaking hand.

*

Remy was so crushed by guilt and shame that his brain sort of shut down the second Chase started up Minna's truck. Nausea rolled in his gut, and the ocean air that came in through the open window wasn't doing its job in helping.

I failed
. It was all he could think about.
I failed and let everyone down
. It had been so fucking easy, too. The two hours it had taken him to drive from Bakersfield to Santa Barbara hadn't swayed him one bit. If anything, each mile had made him sink lower and lower.

He'd barely even greeted Trent. His focus had been singular—downing shot after shot. Which he'd done. He'd sat there in that fucking living room surrounded by strangers, and he'd downed half a bottle of vodka in record time. The sweetest buzz had taken over quickly, providing a thin veneer between him and everything that hurt.

It had been glorious.

Until he'd envisioned Chase's reaction…

The last shot hadn't been as easy to swallow. It had burned as he'd thought about how Chase would react. Disappointment? Hurt? Anger? Disbelief? Shock? Resignation? There were too many options, and each one had caused Remy's insides to churn with self-loathing. He'd looked around himself, at all those strange faces and shitheads, and realized the only reason he'd been there—at that level—was because he'd driven there. Nobody had forced him to hang out with scum. It was all on him, and Chase—not to mention Minna and Andy since Remy actually started listening to them—had made him believe he might be a lot more than this…this low-life piece of shit.

All that had brought him to the bathroom upstairs, where he'd tried to get rid of the poison his body loved.

He'd been through this too many times already, but this was worse. Even if his slip hadn't lasted long—nor had he consumed that much alcohol—he was throwing away more now. While he didn't know exactly where he stood with Chase, there was certainly something there, and Remy had finally come to terms with who his real family was: Minna and Andy. And hopefully Chase, if he didn’t run away after tonight.

Remy lolled his head along the headrest and watched Chase drive in silence. It was dark, but it wouldn’t be long before the sun rose.
He went looking for me. He found me
. Combined with Chase's promise of never leaving him, Remy felt hopeful; maybe he wouldn’t run away, after all. But at the same time, the guilt weighed down heavier and he wouldn’t blame anyone for bailing.

Not only had Chase and Andreas tracked him down, but they'd brought friends. Cam Nash and…Remy wasn’t sure about the other man. It wasn’t Austin, anyway.

"Is there anything we need to pick up for the cabin?" Chase checked the rearview as he stopped at an intersection. They'd be on their way into the desert soon enough. "Food, water, sodas, smokes…?"

"No," Remy whispered, facing forward. "It's all there." He closed his eyes but found it made him dizzier.
Fuck
. He thought of Gale and her encouraging him to seek help for his addiction, and he knew he had to do that—stat. He also thought of how the fuck he was going to tell her about his failure.

That last word went on a loop in his head.

Otherwise it was only silence, and it stretched out much as the dark road did.

In his periphery, he saw Chase tightening his grip on the wheel several times, and Remy didn’t dare ask what he was thinking. It couldn’t be positive.

"I was so goddamn worried, Remy."

So much for not knowing
. Remy gnashed his teeth together, tears blurring his vision. "I'm sorry—"

"Don’t." Chase's voice was quiet but firm, warm but no-nonsense. "We'll take a step back to regroup. Don’t worry about it."

Remy did worry, though. "When you say
we
…"

Chase reached over and grabbed Remy's hand, threaded their fingers together, and kissed Remy's inked knuckles. "I mean we, baby. I'm not going anywhere."

If it sounded too good to be true, it probably was.

Right?

Chase couldn’t possibly mean what he was saying.

"I just want you to know I'd get it." Remy forced out the words. "I wouldn’t hold it against you if you decide it's too much."

"Would you stop that shit?" Chase snapped. Next he pulled over to the side of the deserted road, evidently not caring about any violations, and killed the engine. "Look, it's been a long damn night, and right now I'm just thankful you're still breathing, so can we save the talking 'til tomorrow?"

"Why are you thankful?" Remy asked desperately. He needed to
understand
. "You've basically saved me, and what the hell have I done for you, huh?" Chase threw him a lethal glare at that, but Remy wasn’t done. "Tell me that. Tell me why you haven't cut your losses—"

Chase exploded. "Because I fucking love you, Remy!"

Remy blinked, shocked and startled. Time stopped and restarted. A single breath was released, but he didn’t know from whom.
Because I fucking love you…
Oh, Christ. Oh, Jesus Christ. Remy's breathing picked up, his skin prickling and his head pounding.

Having sensed their connection was one thing, but to find out this…? Whole other matter.

"I didn’t—" Chase groaned and scrubbed his hands over his face. "I didn’t mean for it to come out like that, but
Jesus
, you frustrate me. I thought I was bad when it comes to putting yourself down, but you take the fucking cake."

Remy barely paid attention to those words. Too busy letting the previous words sink in.

He wanted to cry with relief. In fact, he couldn’t hold back. Emotions welled up so fast that he couldn’t contain the first whimpered breath. Which probably alerted Chase to his imminent breakdown.
For Christ's sake, hold it together
. Remy scolded himself over and over, but nothing worked.

"Come here." Chase shifted in his seat and pulled Remy close, his arms enveloping and providing warmth. Comfort. Love… Chase pressed his lips to Remy's head and shushed him every time Remy choked out an apology.

*

Chase had no idea how much time passed, only that the horizon was morphing into purple and orange. It reminded him so much of the morning he and his fellow survivors watched the traitorous sun rise higher and higher after they'd escaped that burning building and months of darkness.

A lot had changed. A lot had happened.

All of which led to this exact moment. Just him and Remy—together. Three years of freedom, yet nothing compared to everything he'd been through these past three months with Remy. Even the bad times; hell, sometimes especially those 'cause they were the ones that tended to lead to progress.

Chase was running on fumes, but the exhaustion couldn’t touch him. His tears had dried, and Remy was down to tremors and sniffles.

Despite the struggles and ups and downs they had to look forward to, Chase realized he was happy. Genuinely and incredibly
happy
. His fears were fading rapidly.

It…it had been worth it. All of it.

God, he'd been waiting for this moment.

He drew in a deep breath and let his lips linger at the top of Remy's head. And he knew without a shadow of doubt that this was it—him and Remy. They hadn't talked about it, but it suddenly didn't matter because Chase already knew. It was too fucking obvious.

"Remy," he murmured.

Remy hummed and shuddered, appearing to be caught between sleep and awareness.

"Let's head to the cabin." Chase brushed his knuckles over Remy's cheek. "We both need some serious sleep."

And tomorrow we'll talk
.

*

Remy woke to the sound of rain falling outside the cabin. He didn't move. His eyes opened, but he remained still. His head on Chase's chest.

Remy had slept fitfully the first few hours, and after one particularly gruesome nightmare where he was surrounded by bodies, drugs, alcohol, and no air, he'd escaped to take a cold shower, brush his teeth for half an eternity, have a smoke, and just sit outside for a bit. Then back to Chase and sleep. More restful this time. Maybe because his last thought before he'd succumbed to sleep had been about Chase's confession last night.

I didn’t say it back. I have to tell him I love him, too.

It was colder than usual for October, but Remy reveled in it. With the open window, the breeze poured into the cabin and raised goose bumps along his arms. The air seemed fresher.

He felt stronger.

Noticing that the rise and fall of Chase's chest had changed patterns, Remy lifted his head to find his man awake.

"Mornin'," Chase rumbled in a sleepy voice.

Remy smiled briefly. "It's three in the afternoon."

Chase merely hummed and rolled on top of Remy. He dropped soft kisses along Remy's collarbone and chest, to which Remy sighed in contentment and let his inner demons go quiet.

It would be easy to say something along the lines of
"You're still here—I can't believe it,"
but he had to stop doing that. He had to believe there was good in him and that he could contribute in a relationship.

"I love that you're here," he murmured instead.

Chase smiled into the kiss he placed on Remy's chin. "Get used to it. Now…can I have you?"

Remy grinned and parted his legs farther. "Have at it."

Was this really happening? Could Chase be this forgiving—light and carefree right after Remy had fucked up so royally?

It was amazing.

"You little shit. That's not what I meant." Chase chuckled and raised himself off the bed. "But hey…" He reached for the lube on the nightstand.

"What
did
you mean?" Remy sat up and slid his hands up Chase's thighs. He closed the distance and sucked Chase's semi-hard cock into his mouth.

"I—fuck." Chase shivered and weaved his fingers into Remy's hair, guiding him. "I was talkin' about you, period." That made Remy shiver, too. Chase grasped Remy's chin and made him look up. "This is real. Be mine."

God, yes.

*

"God, yes."

Chase smiled widely, not sure Remy was even aware he'd said that out loud, and nudged him back on the bed. He kissed Remy hard while he slowly pushed inside, savoring every goddamn second.

"All yours," Remy mumbled into the kiss. "And I…I love you."

"Fuck." Chase had to stop before he lost it too soon. Then he grabbed Remy's jaw and kissed him painfully hard. The utter fucking joy that washed over him was unlike anything else. "I love you, too." So this was what belonging felt like. "You have no idea how much."

"Tell me." Remy spurred him on by pushing back, giving Chase no choice but to give up on his attempt at keeping it together.

He went deep, withdrew, and thrust forward again. Fluid movements set the bed in motion, and their moans echoed one another's.