Outcome (Aftermath #2) (21 page)

BOOK: Outcome (Aftermath #2)
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"You're…" Chase released a breath and rested their foreheads together. "You're so worth it, Remy." He closed his eyes to savor that truth, and he'd never been this at peace. "Everything…I'd go through it again if it meant you were waiting for me."

Remy's hitched breath slowed everything down, and Chase opened his eyes to see Remy's green eyes swimming with emotion. All his insecurities were visible; Remy wanted to believe but was afraid to.

"I mean it." Chase kissed him deeply. "Not just when life sucks. Every day."

"Even when I fail and fuck up?"

Chase growled at Remy's choice of words and slammed inside as hard as he could. Remy groaned loudly and screwed his eyes shut. There was some cursing, too.

"Yeah. Even then," Chase muttered, outta breath. "Even when you don't give me enough credit." He smirked a little to show he was half teasing.

Remy didn’t smirk. He pulled Chase down for a bruising kiss, and he mumbled apologies, murmured words of affection, promised to fight, and told Chase how much he loved him.

"That’s better." Chase let out a low laugh. Dizzy with desire, happiness, and love. Getting close, he grasped Remy's cock and stroked him firmly.

It wasn’t long before their orgasms took over.

Chapter 24

The day after, Chase was busy catching up on paperwork in his office. He checked the time and saw Remy was gonna call soon. If he felt up to it, he was even gonna swing by the bar. Since it hadn't opened yet, Chase wasn’t too worried about that. He was more concerned about Remy's meeting at AA.

Chase and Remy had spent all of yesterday talking things out, setting up a semblance of structure in their lives, rolling around in the sheets, and making plans. They'd also laid all cards on the table, which was how Chase had found out about all the things that had triggered Remy's relapse.

It was unfathomable that Remy had contacted Clarissa and Fred for Chase's sake. Shedding some light on Ben's life would've quenched Chase's curiosity and given him some comprehension, but it wouldn’t change anything. Yet, Remy had called the two people who had treated him horribly…

"Honey, I'm home!"
Donna called from the bar, announcing her arrival.
"Chase, you here?"

Chase stood up, figuring he could use a break anyway, and left the office.

Donna was beaming when he reached the bar. "Hi!"

"How are ya?" Chase quirked a brow and smiled just because she was.

"I'm having a girl!" she burst out.

"Well, damn." Chase's smile widened and he rounded the bar to pull her in for a tight hug. "Congratulations, honey. I'm so happy for you." Understatement. Donna was a fighter, and Chase couldn’t be prouder. "Who took you to the doc?" He ended the hug and grasped her shoulders.

She shrugged and smiled innocently.

To which Chase frowned. "I told you I could take you. You don’t have to do everything alone, you know."

Jesus fucking Christ
. His words settled, and he couldn’t believe the irony. Something that had always been so easy for him, helping others, had only recently been embraced in the other direction. He now knew he didn’t have to do everything alone, either.

"That’s our mascot cookin' in there." He grinned and brushed his palm over her little baby bump.

"You were busy getting your bike and working." She shrugged again. "It's really okay." She looked it too, but Chase wasn’t satisfied.

"I don't give a shit." He looped an arm around her shoulders to guide her behind the bar. "Family comes first, and that means you, too." He opened the fridge and grabbed two sodas. "I wanna know all your appointments. All right?"

Donna was beaming again. Also, she appeared to be close to tears, so Chase thrust the soda into her hands and changed the topic to work. He didn’t deal with emotional women very well. Every time Ade was down in the dumps, he made a fool of himself.

"Hold up!" Donna laughed. "You can't do a 180 like that—"

"I can and I will," Chase argued petulantly. "Now, unless you have other news to share—"

It was Donna's turn to cut him off. "I do, actually. I got a part-time position at a security company, but it won't interfere with this job. It's just in the mornings—I'll be taking calls and stuff."

Hmm. That was no good. Chase had been thinking about this today; he needed to hire another bartender. Mainly 'cause Remy was putting his foot down, stating that Chase worked too much, but also because every time Chase had to bail, it was Donna—not to mention Austin—who had to pick up the slack. Additionally, Donna wasn’t gonna be able to keep it up forever. She was good now, but in another couple months she'd be waddling all over the place when all she'd really need was rest.

That said, he knew she had no benefits. He couldn’t afford that, although he was gonna do his best to help her.

"Don't overdo it," he told her, making a mental note to talk to Remy about it.

One of the many things they'd discussed yesterday was Chase moving in with Remy. Remy had insisted, despite the fact that he wasn’t himself ready to move back home. But he wanted Chase in that house. And Minna was moving out soon…

Chase couldn’t say the thought of waking up in the middle of the night to a screaming baby held any appeal, but he was protective of Donna. If he could help, he was going to. Besides, if—when—Chase moved in with Remy, he didn’t have to do his paperwork in the office.

"You're thinking hard about something." Donna narrowed her eyes.

Chase grinned faintly. "Maybe." Off the top of his head, he could come up with a studio solution for Donna. It would take some money he didn’t have yet, but if he and Donna pitched in together, they could have a wall removed in the office, which would open up one of the two supply closets. It would add some much-needed space but be a decent-sized, temporary studio. If Donna couldn’t afford her place. "Anyway, don’t make any rash decisions before asking for help. Deal?"

Donna scrunched her nose. "Who are you and what have you done to my boss?" Humor seeped into every word. "Someone might think you've met someone."

Chase smirked and opened his soda, all while taking a few steps backward toward the office again. "Someone might."

"Oh, don’t be so vague." Donna clearly wanted gossip. "Who is she? You haven't brought anyone around." Chase chuckled and turned around, closing in on the door. "Or is it a he? Don't think I haven't considered that option, boss!"

Chase laughed a little harder and disappeared down the hall.

*

Remy was comfortable with his decision. The therapist Gale had suggested was nice as hell, but Remy hadn't been able to shake the whole being a patient thing. And the sponsor he'd just had coffee with through a contact at AA had taken care of that issue. Because Harvey, the fifty-something-year-old who was now officially Remy's sponsor, didn’t have a degree to preach about addiction. He had experience and he'd been on the road to recovery for the past twenty years.

It made Remy feel more equal.

Harvey seemed like a nice guy, too. Funny, open-minded, blunt, and caring. Completely pussy-whipped, but whatever. His wife had brought them some cake that tasted like charcoal, but Harvey had gone for seconds and thirds.

Regardless, Remy was at peace. Everything was out in the open, no problem was being ignored, and he had a great support system.
Family
. He had a family.

One of his family members pounced the minute he got back to the house. Andreas was treating his girl to a day in LA, while also picking up one of Remy's cars—two birds, one stone—so it was evidently Minna's job to handle the inquisition.

"Do you like AA?"

"What happened to not wanting group sessions—oops, my bad, circle jerks."

"Is your sponsor nice?"

"Do they really give out those chips?"

Remy was slightly overwhelmed but answered every question as best he could. Then it was time to get something out of the way before he headed over to Chase's bar.

"I have something to tell you," he said, sitting down at the kitchen table. It was full of lists and samples for Minna's move. She'd narrowed it down to two places, one house nearby and one condo, and she already knew exactly what colors to paint her new home.

"That sounds ominous." Minna sat down carefully, trepidation in her eyes. "You better not make me cry. I have a date tonight, and I can't go all puffy."

Remy snorted in amusement. "Don’t worry, you'll look perfect." He was a little nervous, but not for himself. It was all Chase and how he'd handle this. "I'll just cut right to the…" He couldn’t help it; he laughed. "Chase."

"Okay, you're being weird." Minna chuckled and gave him a strange look. "What's so funny about cutting to the chase?"

"
Chase
," Remy emphasized, smiling. "He and I…we're together."

Minna's mouth popped open.

Remy waited.

Five…

Four…

Three…

"You ruined my fucking fantasy, Stahl!" she suddenly cried out. Remy's eyebrows shot up, and Minna huffed and scowled and huffed again. "
God
. Out of all the guys, you had to fucking steal that one! He was like the perfect book boyfriend!"

The perfect
what
? Remy shook his head, trying to clear it and catch up with Minna's thoughts, but that wasn’t always easy. "I…I got nothin'."

Minna wasn’t listening, too busy muttering crap Remy barely understood. "I'm down to three fantasy guys now…" She started stacking papers together on the table. "…and I don’t fucking get why the hottest ones are gay—"

"Minna!" Remy snapped his fingers in front of her face. She looked up and blinked. "Focus, you little nymph."

She huffed, because she was good at that. "Fine. Okay." She pinned him with a serious look. "Like, really? You're together?"

"Yes." He smiled.

Her look softened immediately. "You're not joking," she murmured. "That's why you've been so tranquil lately—other than…" Yeah, other than when Remy took off. "You're in love." Remy nodded with a dip of his chin. It felt…new…and too intimate to talk about it with Minna. For now, anyway. "And Chase feels the same?"

Another nod from Remy.
For some unknown reason, he loves me, yeah
.

Minna's face broke into a beautiful smile. "Okay, I can see it now. You're each others' strengths. You support and guide each other and—"

"All right." It was getting a bit too sappy. Remy rose from his seat and rounded the table to kiss the top of Minna's hair. "I love you like crazy, Min, but you should lay off the romance novels."

"Never!" Minna mock-scowled up at him. "Don't speak such filth. Now, tell me everything. How it started, how you exchanged 'I love yous,' who initiated it—"

"I'm already late," Remy blurted out. Jeesh, there was no stopping this chick. "If you want the dirt, you'll just have to come with me to the bar. I'm going over there now."

Minna glanced at the clock, probably determining if she had time. Date, dirt, date, dirt—what was more important?

"Okay, give me five minutes."

Dirt, apparently.

Chapter 25

It was only half an hour before the bar opened that Chase saw Remy walking through the door. Donna was in the back, Tuck never showed up until they opened, and…Remy wasn't alone. Minna walked in, too.

Chase drew in a deep breath, nervous and excited and determined and scared all at once. He was
out
. Nobody was lurking in the shadows, ready to kidnap him for being gay. His pops wasn’t alive to haul out homophobic insults.

Chase was free from the ghosts of his past. Now he only needed to get used to it.

"Hello, Chase." Minna was being way too polite. The glint in her eye told Chase everything he needed to know. Remy had spoken to her. "How are you today?"

"I'm fine, sweetheart. You?" Chase's mouth twisted up.

"Stop being weird." Remy chuckled and gave her an odd look before going around the bar, meeting Chase halfway. "Hey."

"Hey." Chase grinned.

Remy grinned.

They were both just kinda staring at each other, matching expressions of happiness.

Despite the struggles they had ahead, Chase wasn’t worried. They were strong enough to handle it. They'd
grown
stronger by being together. Shadows were fading, creases were smoothing out, and colors were brightening.

"Come here." Chase cupped the back of Remy's neck and pulled him close, then dipped down and kissed him. Slowly. Taking his time to taste, nip, and savor. "I missed you today."

Remy hummed and inched closer. "Me too." He let out a shaky laugh and pecked Chase a few times. "Yeah, fuck, me too."

"Should I get popcorn?" And that was Donna. "Hey, you're the naked guy!"

While Chase cracked up, Remy groaned and planted his forehead to Chase's collarbone.

"No, no, let's be social now, baby." Chase turned Remy around but kept Remy's back to his chest. "Naked Guy—or Remy—this is Donna, my cheeky brat of an employee."

Donna smirked and walked forward to shake Remy's hand. "Nice to meet you, Naked Guy."

Chase was having a field day with this, relieved it was going so well. In the meantime, it was suddenly Remy who appeared too nervous to function.

"You too," Remy replied, stumbling over his words. "You're pregnant—" He stopped himself there and cursed.

Minna giggled.

Chase hid his grin in Remy's hair.

Donna looked down. "Oh shit, you're right. I am."

"No—fuck. What I mean is…oh, what the hell am I doing," Remy muttered. Then he took a breath and pointed to Minna. "Her brother's also having a kid. Baby boom in Bakersfield."

Minna saved Remy from his rambling and greeted Donna.

*

A week later, Chase was riding a high he was afraid was about to end. Everything had gone too well. He and Remy were spending their days at the house—which was slowly morphing into Chase's home, too—or they were in therapy together, or they went on drives and spent hours talking about everything and nothing while lying in the bed of Remy's truck.

They spent their nights apart, which was good for both of them at this time. Chase doubted he'd ever stop craving more of Remy, but the cabin was a good barrier. It ensured they didn’t rush everything and that Remy got the space he needed at the end of the day to process and reflect. Chase was doing the same, but in his and Remy's bed at the house.

Even their groups of friends were getting along and spending time together. Austin and Cam had been busy with work lately, but Landon and Andreas had stopped by the bar for a beer a couple times, and Minna and Donna had exchanged numbers to go shopping for baby clothes.

"Is there somethin' in the water around here?"
Landon had asked when he'd learned about Chase and Remy.
"Perhaps I should warn Jules I might be into dudes soon."
He'd had a teasing glint in his eye, and then he'd only slapped Chase's shoulder, given it a squeeze, and returned to his beer.

No judgment.

"You're acting as if I'm going to curse you out,"
Austin had chuckled over the phone.
"I'm happy for you, my friend."

It was surreal.

When's the other shoe gonna drop?

Maybe tonight? Ade was on her way.

Chase had closed the bar for the evening so they could all have dinner there. Chase and Remy, Austin and Cam and Riley, Adriana, Landon and his family, Minna with a date, Andreas with his fiancée, Donna, Old Tuck… But, thankfully, Chase would have some alone time with Ade before everyone showed up.

"I'm off to my meeting soon." Remy wiped some sweat off his forehead with the sleeve of his shirt. They'd cleaned the entire establishment together and prepared for tonight. "I'll pick up the barbecue on my way back. Was there anything else?"

Chase pursed his lips and stared pensively at the tables they'd pushed together to form a long one. "Gale advised you to pick a seat." She'd declined the invitation to come, flattered but careful not to form friendships with patients, and she'd told Remy to stay away from temptation by sitting with those he was most comfortable with.

Chase wasn’t gonna drink, no matter how many times Remy had told him it was okay.

"I don’t know, a corner spot?" Remy shrugged and scratched his eyebrow.

"She also told you not to alienate yourself," Chase reminded him.

"Then you pick my damn seat, baby." Remy laughed and passed him with a kiss to his bicep. "Did you talk to the landlord about permits?" He walked over to the bar and got a glass of water.

Chase nodded. They were waiting for the okay to hire contractors to tear down a wall in the office. Donna wouldn't technically be allowed to live there, but the landlord, who seemed fond of Donna, had promised to overlook it for a while.

Chase had tossed around ideas about it with Remy, who'd said there was no reason to wait until they'd "saved up." Remy had money, he'd stated, followed by a long rant of wanting to help out, even if it was only materialistic stuff so far—it was the least he could do, he'd said. To which Chase had rolled his eyes 'cause if Remy didn’t see all the other things he did for people, he was fucking nuts.

Donna was besides herself with relief and gratitude. She'd always come off as a carefree young woman, but since Chase broke the news to her about turning the office into a studio for her, it was clear that a huge weight had been lifted off her shoulders.

"Materialistic stuff" or not, it was Remy who'd made it possible this soon. 

"Have you thought about the other thing I suggested?" Remy asked. "You need to talk to the landlord about that, too. If you want to go for it."

Uh-huh. Chase was learning that Remy had a good eye for business. Which shouldn't come as such a surprise since Remy had owned a multimillion-dollar company himself. But turning a biker hangout into a coffee shop during the daytime hours? Chase wasn’t so sure.

He slid Remy a dubious look.

Remy grinned. "Quit thinking about coffee shops. It's what you're hung up on, isn't it?" Well, yeah. "I also mentioned
diner
. Some bikers pass through just to get food, and we're close enough to the outskirts." He shrugged one shoulder and leaned back against the bar. "I need a project, something to occupy my mind, before I think about getting back to work full-time."

Yeah, Andreas was itching for that day to arrive, but Chase was glad Remy refused to rush.

"You wanna be my partner or somethin'?" Chase winked.

"How punny of you," Remy shot back, laughing. "But no, this is your baby. I just want to help and get my hands dirty." He smiled.

That could certainly be arranged.

*

Chase's nerves returned with vengeance the minute Ade walked in the door and hugged the shit outta him.

"God, I missed you!"

Chase managed a smile and tightened his hold on her. "Right back at'cha, kiddo. You're a busy girl." He backed off and kissed her on the forehead. "How's the big city treatin' ya?"

Ade sighed heavily and threw her bag down on the bartop. "It's exhausting. I miss home."

That
was definitely new, but Chase was thrilled. "So move home. Finish your studies and come back." He tilted his head at Ade's scowl, which she directed at the floor. "Hey." He lifted her chin and raised a brow. "Did somethin' happen?"

She waved it off. "Nothin' I can't handle, big brother." She hopped up on the bartop and slid over to the other side and jumped down. "Just some guy trouble." At Chase's instant glare and the way he tensed up, she was quick to elaborate. "I swear it's nothing. I was sorta dating this one dude, and I made it clear I'm focusing on school and work. He agreed, but now he's being a douche. Says I don’t give him enough attention, and his way of getting back at me—like this is some game—is to flirt with my friends." She rolled her eyes and grabbed a Coke from the fridge.

Chase huffed and folded his arms across his chest. Of course he was relieved it was nothing worse, but… "You know, there
is
a way to avoid this kind of trouble."

"By avoiding guys altogether?" Ade replied wryly.

"Damn right."

She giggled. "Soon you'll tell me I'm too young, too."

Well, you fucking are
. "I'm serious," he argued. "I should know—I'm a man. We're shitheads."

"Uh-huh." She grinned and leaned her elbows on the counter. "So tell me, shithead. What's new with
you
? Last we talked on the phone, I counted seven times you either laughed, chuckled, or snickered. It can't all be therapy."

Chase snorted then sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. Guess there was no use in beating around the bush. "I suppose I do have some news." He dragged his ass over to one of the barstools and sat down.

"I knew it. You've met someone." Ade was faking seriousness. She threw a rag over her shoulder and poured two shots of
soda
. "Lemme hear it, cowboy." Okay, this wasn’t a saloon in the Wild West, but whatever.

"You were always a clown, honey." Chase shook his head, amused, and followed suit when Adriana downed the first shot of Coke. She pretended it burned and shuddered visibly. "All right…" He took a breath and gathered his thoughts.
Please don't fucking judge me, sis
. "Yeah, I've met someone. It's serious, too." Jesus Christ, his gut tightened to the point where it hurt. "I've told you about—about him. It's Remy."

Adriana's expression gave away
nothing
. She stared at him blankly, which sure as shit didn’t make it easier for Chase.

Then, cool as a cucumber, she set down the Coke bottle and turned around to grab one of the bottom-shelf tequilas. "I see," she said as she poured.

She threw back two shots right away.

Chase could almost hear the clock on the wall.
Ticktock, ticktock
. The silence stretched on, driving him fuckin' bonkers.

She didn’t have to endure much of Pops's bullshit growing up because she was the little princess. It was Ma's job to raise her. And she was only ten when they died. That said, the last ten years of their father's life were also the worst ones. He was bitter and almost everything was wrong. Nothing was his fault. Always others'. The government, hippies, yuppies, queers, punk rockers, anarchists, atheists…he always found someone to blame.

"So you're gay…" Ade stared down at her empty glasses. "Why didn’t you tell me?" She lifted her gaze at that, but she didn’t give Chase enough time to answer. "I mean, I'm not blind. I've thought about it. I've even considered why you'd hide something like that. The way we grew up…?" She puffed out a breath. "I get it. But why not tell
me
?"

Chase felt like he was underwater, a rushing sound in his ears. Disembodied, far away. He felt
small
.

"I was ashamed," he answered numbly, quietly. "I was scared shitless." He let out a low, humorless laugh. "I couldn’t take any more judgment." There were more reasons, but Chase chose not to get into the whole clusterfuck of why Ben had targeted him. "I was just tired, Ade. It was easier to hide." Like a coward.

Adriana shook her head and smiled sadly. "It's cost you a lot, though. Hasn’t it?"

Yes, it had. But what mattered now was whether or not honesty was gonna cost him even more. "Up until recently, I only had you in my life," he pointed out. "The thought of losing you now is fuckin' devastating, but before, when I was alone? Christ, it woulda slayed me."

"Oh, Chase." Ade's eyes welled up, and she hurried to join Chase on his side of the bar. He held out an arm as she flew into him. "You'd never lose me." She sniffled. "And not over something so damn trivial." She slapped his arm then hugged him again.

Trivial
.

It was
supposed
to be trivial, but reality was different.

All Chase could do was thank his lucky stars Adriana was more open-minded and accepting.

"I love you." He kissed the side of her head and gave her another squeeze.

She looked up and pecked his cheek. "Love you too, Chase."

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