Owned (12 page)

“Can you guys catch a ride to the ranch? Help get everything set up and play host and hostess? I really want to make sure they bury him right,” I asked them.

“You sure, Kate?” Nate whispered, not bothering to hide the concern in his voice.

“Yeah, I need to do this alone. Go ahead, I’ll be home as soon as it’s over,” I explained, extending my hand for the keys to the truck. He sighed as he handed them to me and Jamie gave me a half hug and left. I nodded to the cemetery crew and they started lowering in the casket. It took them about half an hour to lower in the concrete top that went over the casket, fill up the rest with dirt, and break down the equipment.

I didn’t move the entire time.

It was probably another half hour of staring at the freshly laid dirt before the tears came. I dropped to my knees and cried, slowly at first, but as crying always did, it got worse and worse. I had no clue how long I had been there, letting out every tear I hadn’t shed since my parents died. I realized suddenly I wasn’t alone.

“Kate, it’s time to come home,” Nate said, kneeling next to me.

“I can’t,” I sobbed.

“Honey, you’ve been here over three hours. I know you needed time to be alone and see this through, but it’s time, Kate.”

“I can’t leave him,” I argued through a new wave of tears.

“You have to, Kate. You can’t stay here. You can’t go with him,” he said, starting to cry as well.

“I want to stay with him. I can’t leave him all alone.”

“He’s not alone. He’s with your parents and your gram. He’s not down there in that coffin, that’s just his body.”

“I can’t go,” I said, burying my face in my hands as Nate wrapped his arms around me, crying with me. We must have stayed like that for a while longer, because the next thing I knew Nate let me go and another pair of strong arms picked me up. I knew without looking it was Jared and he was cradling me to his chest. I kept mumbling, “I can’t go.”

He just ignored me, lifting me into the truck on his lap. “I know, sweetheart. I know,” he whispered every so often, kissing the top of my head. I realized the truck had stopped and he was carrying me into the house. Everyone had gone home by then and he brought me straight to my room, where Jamie was waiting to help me undress. She tucked me into bed and kept playing with my hair while I cried myself to sleep.

The next several days I started to fall into a routine, but I didn’t talk to anyone… Not a single word. If someone started to talk to me, or tried to make me talk, I just left the room. I did my best to wear myself out physically and mentally.

I’d go for a run every morning and either Dean or Jared would go with me, never speaking. I’d try not to stare or check them out, I really did, but they were just so damn sexy. I just didn’t feel that trying to handle my grief and depression was the time to take them up on their offer of fun.

Then I’d shower and dress, saddle my horse, and go for a ride. I was always checking out several things on the property that I needed to see for myself, and again one of them would always go with me. And honestly, it was hard for me because I found myself becoming a little jealous of the horses they rode. They were so good to them and a big part of me wanted that attention… But it was my own fault really for closing them out. I just didn’t know how to let them in.

After the first day, I’d nod or shake my head at yes-or-no questions but I still couldn’t seem to get my mouth to work. In between my tiring myself out, I’d sit on the porch swing and stare off into space. Sometimes someone sat with me, careful not to touch me, and sometimes I’d sit alone.

Two days after the funeral Nate and Jamie had to leave. When they were all packed up I hugged them both and went for a swim. I’d swim in the afternoons, setting a rigorous pace of laps. Again, Dean or Jared would be there, shirtless and gorgeous, watching me intently.

I heard most of the whispers when they were talking about me. Nate and Jamie were scared to leave me alone, but the Acker brothers assured them if I got worse they’d call. The only time anyone was forceful with me was mealtimes. They’d drag me from whatever I was doing to make me sit at the table. After dinner I’d work on the ranch financials and reports for my company, setting up training schedules and everything else that needed to be done.

And as my last attempt to wear myself out for the day, I’d go work on the bag in the barn, and again one of them would be there holding the bag while I beat the shit out of it. And that just normally left me sexually wound up all night. Their grunting as they took the impact made me think of impacting them in a whole new way.

I was pretty sure Jamie had told them all my favorite meals, because they always made something she thought I liked. Dean was incredibly patient with me, and Jared was trying, he really was, but I could see the impatience in his face.

By the fifth day I realized I was grief stricken and fighting my lust for both of them so hard I couldn’t do both. That night everyone was asleep, except me as usual. I was sitting out on the porch swing when Dean came out to join me.

“Couldn’t sleep?” he asked.

“No,” I answered, finally speaking, and I felt him stiffen next to me, almost afraid he imagined it. My voice was so raw from all the crying and not having been used for so long that it didn’t really sound like me.

“You really like this swing. It helps comfort you, doesn’t it?” he asked gently, trying his luck again.

“After my parents died and I moved to the ranch, I used to sit out here for hours on end. My gramp would come sit next to me a lot, never talking or trying to get me to talk. He’d just be there with me, as if it was his way of telling me I wasn’t alone. I used to tease him when I got older that he had never really talked because he had no clue what to say to me,” I said, smiling. Dean chuckled at that and I turned to face him. “Thanks for being patient with me, letting me know I wasn’t alone.”

“You’re welcome, Kate,” he whispered tenderly. “There’s no right or wrong way to grieve, everyone handles it in their own way. No one means to push you, we’re all just scared and worried about you. Jamie and Nate said they’ve never seen you like this, and it was breaking their hearts they couldn’t help you.”

“I know, but I just couldn’t find my voice and it made me feel guilty.”

“Well I’m glad you finally found it, it’s such a pretty voice it’d be a shame never to hear it again.” He smiled at me. That was all it took for me to lean in and brush my lips over his, moving back to look at him when I was done to gauge his reaction. At first his eyes were filled with surprise, and then hunger. Pure, raw hunger, like he hadn’t eaten in years and I was a banquet sitting before him.

He leaned in slowly for another kiss, giving me time to stop it, but I didn’t want to stop it. It was soft and gentle, so gentle it surprised me and I sighed. It was just enough for him to be able to slide his tongue in my mouth, and he took the opportunity. The kiss was tentative at first, exploring every inch of my mouth before it grew more heated.

But he still kept things very gentle, even when he put one arm over my shoulder and pulled me closer. I wrapped my arms around his neck and his hand went to my waist. Slowly he slid it up to touch my breast, and when he started squeezing and kneading it, he let out a groan.

“I’ve been dying to touch you like this,” he whispered as he started to kiss along my jaw then up my neck to my ear. “You’re going to have to tell me to stop. I will if you tell me to, but I can’t on my own.” He nibbled on my earlobe as he said it and I practically melted.

I started nuzzling and kissing his neck. He smelled so damn good. Like sun, sweat, and just a hint of aftershave or cologne, that I wanted to eat him up. When I didn’t say anything to stop him, he took it as a green light and lifted me in his arms. He carried me back into the house, locking the front door, and headed towards my bedroom. Alone in my room with the door closed, he slid me to my feet. The movement was so erotic, my nipples got hard and I could feel his cock was too.

He ripped his shirt off and I let my hands roam over his chest and shoulders. He didn’t say a word, just watched me until I ran my hands over his perfectly flat abs. Grabbing my hands when I did, he tried to catch his breath, and I stared at him curiously. “Baby, you keep touching me like that and my control is going to break.”

“I’m sorry, did I do it wrong?” I asked, not sure what he meant.

“No, you were doing it too good, I want to be gentle with you,” he said, tilting his head as if confused. “Kate, you’ve done this before, right?”

“Yes, I’m not a virgin.” I felt my face flush. How stupid was I making myself look?

“How many times before?”

“Twice.” I tried to look away but he caught my chin in his hand and lifted my face so I could look in his eyes.

“With the same man?” he asked gently.

“No, two men, I had sex with them once each. I guess I didn’t do it right if they didn’t want to do it again,” I mumbled, embarrassed and closing my eyes so I didn’t have to see his reaction.

“Kate, look at me.” He waited until I did. “I’m sure you didn’t do anything wrong, sweetie. Men are assholes, we all are, just some of us aren’t as bad as others.”

He leaned in and kissed me again, more passionately this time, but still gentle. As our tongues dueled, I felt him start to lift my shirt up and we broke apart so he could get it over my head.

“God, baby, they’re even better than I dreamed,” he groaned, cupping my breasts. I let out a small gasp when he pinched my nipples and I ran my hands over his stomach again. I started to unbutton his jeans and pull his cock free, but stopped, frozen, when I saw it. It was huge! It had to be over ten inches and not fully hard yet.

“Dean, that’s not going to fit,” I said, almost crying because I wanted him so bad.

“I promise it will. It will fit in your pussy perfectly.” He started nibbling on my ear again and his hands were doing amazing things with my nipples and it was hard to think.

“No, you don’t understand, the others weren’t anywhere near as big,” I explained softly, trying not to break apart in frustration. “They complained I was too tight.”

“Oh,” he groaned. “Kate, you’re going to kill me. Tight is good, baby. Tight is very,
very
good.” And before I could say anything he leaned over and licked my nipple. Dean picked me up and gently laid me on the bed on my back with him on my side.

Sliding off his jeans, he went back to feasting on my breasts. It was the most pleasant torture I’d ever had. He slowly circled my right nipple with his tongue, then sucked on it over and over. Sometimes gently and sometimes a little more rough, then he would go back to tracing around it with just his tongue. Right as my heart rate would come back down, he would bite down just the littlest bit and it made me wriggle.

“You like that, don’t you?” he teased me, going back to sucking, and then switched to my left nipple. My only response was another moan and to reach for his cock. It felt so amazing in my hand as I let my fingertips trace the head of it. When Dean growled in response and started sucking my nipple with more exuberance, I took it as a sign he liked it.

I wrapped my hand around the length of it, feeling it get harder, and Dean invaded my mouth. He kissed me fiercely, tongue no longer exploring, more like he was going to drink me alive. I thrust mine into his mouth, matching his pace as I felt his hand tracing circles down my stomach towards my pussy. Spurred on, I squeezed his dick harder and started to pump it in my hand.

“Don’t stop doing that, baby, please don’t stop,” he begged and found my swollen clit. “Oh fuck, your pussy’s bare. Oh god is that hot.”

I gasped and shuddered when he touched it. He figured out before I did that I was close to coming. “That’s it. Come for me, Kate,” he encouraged before latching onto my left nipple and increasing how fast his fingers moved on my clit. I felt pressure building in my stomach and lower before it quickly rolled over me. My climax quickly came and I let out a loud startled cry as sparks of light filled my vision.

I rode it out as he kept playing with me and as the waves of pleasure started to subside I came again. This time he slid a finger in me as he was playing with my clit and I spread my legs even wider. “Oh baby, you are tight. That’s it, honey, keep coming for me, it’s so hot that you can have multiple orgasms.” Apparently Dean was quite the dirty rambler when he was turned on.

I liked it.

Right as I thought I was done coming, he slipped a second finger in me and that sent me into a third spiraling climax. “No more, I can’t take any more,” I panted and cried out.

“Yes, baby, much more,” he moaned, pulling his fingers away, and slid off my shorts. I heard the foil tearing of the condom wrapper. I didn’t see him put it on, but he must have. He shifted his weight on top of me, and his latex-covered cock was pushing at the entrance of my pussy. “I’ll go slow, Kate, I promise.”

I nodded and he pushed the head of his cock into me. I cried out even louder, mostly from pleasure, but some pain of him stretching me. When he didn’t move and we both lay there panting, I started to feel the tears burn in my eyes.

“It won’t fit, will it? I’m sorry,” I whispered, trying to keep the emotion out of my voice.

“It fits, sweetie,” he said with a big smile, brushing the hair off my face and looking into my eyes. “I was letting you get used to the size, I didn’t want to hurt you. I want you so much, but I would never hurt you.” He leaned over and kissed me as he pushed in more before he started to pull back out. Slowly entering me again, he pushed more in this time. “I’m not going to last long, baby, next time I will, I promise. It’s been so long for me and you’re so fucking tight, it’s perfect.”