Authors: Natalie Standiford
“Show me,” she said.
“I’m about to do that. Let’s do a little warm-up drive first. Once around the parking lot. Show me what you’ve got.”
Mads carefully accelerated and chugged around the lot in a long, slow circle.
“Let your arm hang slack. Relax.” Sean leaned against her to adjust her arm. He rested his hand on her leg for a second. After
he lifted it, the spot felt hot.
“Give it a little gas, girl,” he said. “There’s no traffic. You’ve got the road to yourself. Let’s see some driving.”
Mads stepped on the gas and the car sped forward. “That’s right. Feel the wind in your hair,” Sean said. “This is what driving
is all about.”
Mads went faster. She was headed straight for the wall of the school. What would she do when she got there? She didn’t know.
She couldn’t think.
“Okay, slow down, slow down.” Sean pressed on her leg to indicate that she should brake. “Head-on collisions with brick walls
are not cool. That might pop the air bags, which would really piss off the old lady.”
He draped his arm over her seat. He was doing it so
he could see her feet and make sure she was pressing on the right pedal. But Mads didn’t care. She sat still for a minute,
just to absorb the feeling of Sean’s arm around the back of her seat.
“Take us over to the curb, and we’ll do the parallel thing,” he said.
She drove to the curb where she’d practiced and failed so many times before and got into the pre-parking position.
“Good,” he said. “You know how to start, anyway. This is going to be a cinch.”
“You don’t know what I’ve been through,” Mads said. “I’m such a screwup! I’m always running over the curb or backing up too
fast or knocking out the muffler….”
“Hold on,” Sean said. “Now listen. You’re getting all worked up. We just started. Today is a new day. You haven’t screwed
anything up yet. What did I tell you? Cool. Be cool. Even if you have no idea what you’re doing, don’t show it. Pretend you
know. Make it look good. It’ll all work out.”
“But—”
He pressed two fingers to her mouth to quiet her. “You’re like a race car driver, see? The greatest girl driver who ever lived.
And you’re parking in front of the Roadhouse because they’re throwing a big party just for
you. ‘Cause you won the Indy 500 or something. So you take it to the curb, no problem. You don’t even think about it. Got
it?”
Mads had no idea what he was talking about, but she nodded yes. His fingers were still on her lips. Without thinking she flicked
out her tongue and licked them. She didn’t know what made her do it—an instinct took over.
“Hey!” He pulled his hand away and laughed. “That’s the right attitude. Now let’s park this baby.”
Unlike all her other tutors, he didn’t tell her which way to pull the steering wheel and when to put on the brakes. He just
slouched back, one arm out the window, and waited for her to do it.
She backed up, pulled into the curb, and stopped. Then she moved forward, aligning the front end with the sidewalk. She backed
up a little to straighten the wheels. And that was it. She did it. She parallel parked.
For a second she was too stunned to say anything. It had been so simple. She sat in the idling car, staring at the wheel.
Sean leaned out the window to see how close she was to the curb. “Awesome. You did it,” he said. “I don’t see what all the
fuss was about.”
“I did it!” Mads shouted. “I did it!”
“Yeah, I said that.”
She threw her arms around him and gave him a hug. It wasn’t a full-body hug because her seat belt held her back. Sean laughed
and patted her on the back. “Way to park, kid. I knew you could do it.”
“I did it!” Mads shouted again. “You don’t understand—that was the very first time!”
“Told you I was a good driver.”
“You’re the best,” she said.
“Do it a couple more times, just to make sure,” Sean said.
She pulled into position and did it again. And again and again. She got it. She couldn’t understand why it had been so hard
for her before. It was just a matter of getting the hang of it.
“Got any other driving problems you need to solve?” Sean asked.
She wished she could think of one. She wanted to stay there with him all day. But on the other hand, knowing she could pass
her test now was a good feeling.
“All right then,” he said. “Let’s go get Slurpees to celebrate. You want to drive to the 7-Eleven?”
“I don’t have my learner’s permit yet.”
“Oh yeah. I guess that would be illegal. Well, I don’t need any more trouble in traffic court, so let’s switch seats.”
She moved to the passenger seat. “Thanks again, Sean. You really saved my butt.”
He patted her leg and said, “Glad I could help. There’s nothing like saving a cute girl’s butt.”
He kept his hand on her leg all the way out of the parking lot and down Rosewood Avenue. Mads was afraid to move. She didn’t
want to do anything to make him take his hand away.
He pulled into the 7-Eleven. Mads felt as if her heart would jump out of her chest. As jittery as if they planned to rob the
place. Sean got out of the car and loped to the front door. She scrambled out to follow him.
Inside the store it was cold and smelled like stale candy. Sean poured himself a root beer Slurpee, and she got cherry. She
liked the way cherry ices stained her lips red. When it was time to pay, she pulled some bills out of her jeans pocket, but
he pushed them away and said, “I got this.”
A gift from Sean. She wished she could save that Slurpee forever. She’d definitely keep the cup.
Back in the car, he clinked his plastic cup against hers. “Here’s to another wack chick on the road,” he said. “Just kidding.
You’ll be great. How’s that Slurpee?”
“Good. Want a taste?”
“Yeah.” He leaned over and sipped from her straw. He
made a face. “Cherry doesn’t taste good after root beer. Here.” He held out his cup for her to taste. She took a sip.
“You’re right. Root beer’s better,” she said. Then she checked her reflection in the side door mirror to see if the cherry
was doing its work. Yep, there it was, a red ring around her lips. Better than the best lipstick and worth it even if it wasn’t
her favorite flavor.
“Let’s blow out of here.” Sean started the car and headed for Mads’ house. He turned up the radio. Rock music blasted through
the car, so it was hard to talk. But every once in a while he looked over at her and gave her that heart-stopping smile. It
was even more killer close up than at the usual distance.
“I saw you playing basketball the other night,” she shouted over the music. “At Fortuna Park.”
“Oh, yeah? I was on fire that night.”
“You were great! Um, did you ever play on a team?” She was struggling to come up with things to say, to keep his attention
on her. She wished this drive could last forever.
“Not since junior high,” Sean said. “Swimming’s year-round, pretty much. And I’m not tall enough to be
really
good.”
“I think you’re tall.”
“That’s ‘cause you’re a shrimp,” he said, but not in a
bad way. He rested his elbow on her head to demonstrate her shrimpiness.
Before she knew it they were on her street, chugging up the hill toward her house. Sean stopped the car but left the engine
running. He turned the radio down.
“So, are we cool?” he said. “You got your parking down?”
“Thank you so much, Sean,” Mads said. “You really helped me.”
“Hey, it was fun.” He unbuckled his seat belt. Then he unbuckled hers. “You’re a cute girl, you know that?”
“I am?” she whispered.
He was slowly, steadily, moving closer. “Yeah, you are. Come on, you know it. Those pinchable little cheeks.” He lightly pinched
one of her cheeks. Her pinchable cheeks had always been one of her least favorite features, since, until that moment, they
had been admired only by aunts and grandmas.
He touched the dimpled spot right under her nose. “You’ve got a little red Slurpee over your lip. Let me fix that for you….”
And that’s when he kissed her. He kissed her fully and deeply on the mouth. This was no friendly peck. He wrapped his arms
around her and pulled her close. She sighed. His breathing got heavy. Her left leg slipped into
the gap between the two seats. She half-sat on the emergency brake. She didn’t care.
He pulled away slightly, holding her head between his two hands. He touched her hair as if it were silk. She stared at him,
wide-eyed and stunned. She couldn’t think.
“Good driving today,” he said. He ran a hand down her spine and back up again, as if to give her a shiver for the fun of it,
because he could. “See you later.”
“See you.” She sat still, unmoving.
Oh
, she thought, her brain sluggish.
I’m supposed to get out now
.
In a trance she opened the car door and stumbled out. She turned and looked at him. He rebuckled his seat belt and gunned
the engine. Somehow she knew that meant she should close the door.
“Bye.” She closed the door. He waved, honked, and drove away.
She stood on the sidewalk for a good ten seconds, in shock.
He loves me!
she thought.
Sean loves me!
That kiss said everything.
He’s finally mine!
All along her street, the trees and shrubs bloomed with flowers. The air smelled like perfume. Why hadn’t she noticed it before?
Her street was the most beautiful street in the whole world!
She blinked. Sean was long gone.
Go inside
, her dopey brain told her. She walked up the jagged stone steps to her
house. Each step looked like a pearl. A pearl button on a wedding dress.
“How was your lesson?” her mother asked. “Did you make any progress?”
Mads nodded. She couldn’t speak. She didn’t want to break the spell. She went straight to the stairs. She had to get to her
room.
“Mads? Are you okay?” her mother said.
She knew she had to answer, convincingly, or her mother would not leave her alone. So she summoned all her strength and squeaked
out, “Yes. I’m fine. Just tired.”
“Okay,” M.C. said, and went back to her book.
Mads closed her bedroom door and lay down. The first shock and joy of being kissed by Sean began to fade, and a flood of new
emotions washed over her.
What a great kisser. He was such a great kisser! As she knew he would be. Her mind drifted back to the awkward fumblings she’d
shared with Stephen, and she felt sad. There was no comparison. Sean was so much better. But then she felt guilty. Stephen
tried. He was so sweet. Maybe he didn’t know what he was doing—not like Sean, who was an expert—but he and Mads were learning
together. Every time she thought about Stephen she felt a stab of guilt, so she pushed him out of her mind.
She closed her eyes and licked her lips, trying to
relive the kiss. The greatest moment of her life. He said she was cute! And then he kissed her. Like he really meant it. Like
he really liked her.
It’s fate
, she thought.
I’ve been resisting it for so long. But now it’s time to face it
.
I’m in love with Sean
.
She’d always loved him. He’d always be the love of her life. She’d thought it wasn’t realistic, but that day was proof that
she—everybody—was wrong. It was real. He’d kissed her. He liked her! Her dream was coming true at last! All she’d needed was
that one chance to be alone with him. He seized that chance and showed her his true feelings.
She felt another rush of joy… and another stab of guilt. Not just over Stephen this time. Holly.
Holly was going to the Hap with Sean. They were dating. She was basically his girlfriend. Mads had just kissed her best friend’s
boyfriend. How could she be so low?
But then, how could she have let Holly go out with him in the first place? How could she have surrendered the love of her
life—her true love—to another girl, without a fight? How could she have been so foolish?
The joy was weakening, replaced by anxiety. What was she going to do? She had to clear her life to make way for this new development,
for Sean. Should she break up with Stephen? When? What about the Hap?
And Holly. Would Sean tell her he’d kissed Mads? Should Mads tell her? Would Holly ever forgive her?
Evening fell, the room grew dark, but Mads stayed on her bed. She didn’t turn on the lights. Suppertime came, and her mother
knocked on the door, but Mads pretended to be asleep. She stayed that way all night, in the dark, images and visions whirling
through her mind, her mood shifting from excitement to fear and back again. She finally fell asleep on top of her bed, still
dressed.
To: linaonme
From: your daily horoscope
HERE IS TODAY’S HOROSCOPE: CANCER: You’re the calm center of a world gone mad. Just like the bubble gum is the center of a
Blow Pop.
Y
ou’re kidding me.” Lina gasped when she heard the news. Mads had called her first thing in the morning. Sean and Mads! “You’re
lying. You’re making this up. Right?”
“It’s true,” Mads said. “Lina, it was so amazing! He must have kissed me for, like, two whole minutes. I didn’t count, but
it felt long. And way too short! He’s such a good kisser. I feel like I’m on drugs. I can’t stop thinking about it!”
Lina didn’t want to believe it. But she knew it had to be true. Sean had kissed Mads. And Mads was sure there was more to
come. She could be right. Who knew what Sean would do next?
“But, Mads,” Lina said, “what about Holly?”
Mads was silent for a minute. Then she said, “I know. I don’t know. What should I do? Do you think I should tell her what
happened?”
“It would be bad if she heard it from someone else,” Lina said. “Like Sean.”
“Do you think she’ll be mad?” Mads said.
“Well…”
“It’s not like I set out to kiss him or anything. I didn’t plan it. And he started it, not me! How can Holly blame me?”
“When it comes to kissing, people aren’t always rational,” Lina said. “She could blame you for kissing him back. If you’re
her friend, you have to tell her. It’s the right thing to do.”