Picking up the Pieces (11 page)

CHAPTER 20

I knew I was inviting trouble, but I just couldn’t sit back and do nothing. Remembering the look on Luke’s face as he dropped me off at the diner the other day was still fresh in my memory.

He hadn’t returned to the diner since the morning of his mom’s accident and that was two days ago. Jeremy told me that when he ran into him, Luke seemed closed off and didn’t hang around any longer than it took to say hello.

I decided to pack up a meal and take it to him. He’d probably been eating nothing but junk since he wasn’t coming to Virgie May’s, so a home cooked meal would do him some good and the diner’s meatloaf was to die for. I added some mashed potatoes, green beans, and a slice of Dutch apple pie and I was off to deliver.

As I pulled into Luke’s apartment complex, my stomach started doing somersaults.
Just being friendly. Just being friendly.
I kept chanting over and over in my head. Logically, I knew I wasn’t doing anything wrong, but the more time I spent with him, the more I started to feel that closeness we used to share, and that terrified me. I felt my walls coming down around him, and I knew that if it kept going like this, I was walking straight into another heart break. But I just couldn’t stop.

Parking my car, I stepped out and stared up at the dilapidated building that Luke lived in. How anyone could live in a rat trap like that was beyond me. Pushing those thoughts out of my head, I made my way up the stairs to his front door. When he answered the door wearing nothing but a pair of basketball shorts, hanging loosely from his waist, I lost my breath and nearly swallowed my tongue.

I knew he was ripped, but what the hell!? I never imagined that amount of muscle was possible on one person. As if that weren’t enough, the guy had beads of sweat running between his perfect pecs all the way down his chiseled abs, past that sexy-as-sin V at his hips and under the waist band of those shorts I wished weren’t there. The thought of licking sweat off a person’s body always seriously grossed me out. That’s just nasty! But I couldn’t stop thinking about how badly I wanted to run my tongue from his neck all the way down to his belly button, and beyond.

I am in serious fucking trouble.

I was pulled out of my daydream when I heard him chuckle. He totally busted me lusting after his rock hard body. My face instantly turned six shades of red. “Enjoying the view, Emmy?” he asked.

I dragged my gaze away from his torso and looked at his face. “Think you could put a shirt on?” was all I could manage to say.

He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned his shoulder against the door jam.
Shit
even his biceps were a sight to behold. “Well now, I don’t know if I want to do that. I’m kinda likin’ this attention.”

Shoving him out of the way, I pushed my way into his apartment. “I figured you’ve been dining on crap for the past couple of days, so I brought you some food. There’s enough in here for Trevor if he’s hungry.”

Luke took the bag from my hand, opened it and sniffed appreciatively. “You’re right. I’ve been living off frozen pizza, and I’m sick to death of that shit. This smells amazing. What’s in here?”

I followed him into the kitchen—or what I could only assume was a kitchen, seeing as it was the size of a closet—and spotted a tattoo on his back as I trailed behind. It was right below his neck, between his shoulder blades. From what I was able to see, it looked like a Celtic knot inlayed in a Maltese cross. It was absolutely beautiful. “Earth to Emmy… you still with me?”

“What? Oh! Um… it’s just meatloaf and a few sides. Oh, and I brought you a slice of pie too.”

He gave me a sly grin. “What kind of pie?”

I rolled my eyes at his question. He knew I still remembered his favorite kind of pie. “Dutch apple, of course.”

“Of course,” he said with a wink.

I shifted uncomfortably from foot to foot. “Well, I should head out and let you and Trev dig in. I’ll see you later.”

I started for the door when Luke spoke up. “Trevor’s not here. He had to head back to Louisiana for the weekend. You wanna help me finish this off?” he asked, pointing at the large portions of food in front of him.

“Thanks, but I already ate, so I’m not really hungry.”

“That’s good because I really didn’t want to share any of this… But I’d still like you to stay.” I knew I should say no and leave, but what my brain was saying and what my body was saying were two totally different things.

I’d like to claim I was logical enough to listen to my brain but nope… I was a typical, hormone-driven female. “Okay. Sure, I’ll stay for a bit.”

We sat and talked for a long time. It felt nice to be in his company without any animosity hanging over us. We joked and laughed. He told me some about his time in the Marines, but I had a feeling he limited the amount he shared because he was afraid of upsetting me. He talked more about his friendship with Trevor and how he ended up as his temporary roommate. My stomach hurt from laughing so hard as Luke told me about some of the shit Trevor had gotten into in the past.

After what seemed like hours, there was finally a lull in the conversation so I broached the subject I’d originally come to talk about. “How’s Ilene doing?”

Luke’s cheerful demeanor disappeared the second the sentence cleared my lips. “Fine, I guess,” was all he offered, so I dug a little further.

“Have you gone to see her?”

“Yeah.” He stood and started to clear dishes from his table. “I’ve checked on her a few times.”

I stood and followed him into the kitchen. The close proximity would’ve normally bothered me, but I had to get him talking. I hated how closed off he got every time the subject of his mother came up. It wasn’t good for him to keep everything inside when it came to his parents.

“Is she feeling any better?”

He started shoving dishes into the dishwasher so roughly I was sure he’d break a few. “Of course she’s feeling better. She’s fuckin’ drunk all day, every day. The woman feels no pain.” He slammed the dishwasher closed and placed his hands on the counter in front of him, dropping his head down.

That helpless feeling settled over me again, so I did the only thing I could think to try and make him feel better. Walking up behind him, I wrapped my arms around his waist, rested my cheek on his back and hugged him tight. I felt his entire body tense up for a moment before he finally relaxed into my hold. My skin prickled all over where I touched him; I ignored it because I knew this was what he needed. We stood in silence like that for what seemed like an eternity before I finally released him slowly and started to pull away.

I opened my mouth to speak but was immediately cut off when Luke spun around and slammed his mouth down on mine in a hungry kiss. When I opened my mouth on a gasp, his tongue snaked in, and I was nearly lost in the taste and feel of him.

“I don’t think we should do this, Luke,” I whispered against his lips.

“Please, Emmy. I need this.
I need
you
.”

He sounded so frantic that any rational thoughts I’d had were gone. The only thing I could do was let myself get lost in the kiss.

I pushed up on the balls of my feet and leaned in, trying to get as close as humanly possible, swallowing the moan Luke released from deep in his throat. I fisted my hands in his hair, trying to pull him closer to me. Luke followed my direction perfectly as he grabbed my hips and lifted me up onto the counter. I wrapped my legs around his waist and threw my head back as his lips trailed down my neck to that sensitive spot right below my ear.

The only thought in my head was that I wanted him more than I’d ever wanted anything. I needed to feel all of him, his skin on my skin, his lips on my lips. I wanted him inside of me more than I wanted my next breath. He must have felt the exact same way, because the minute I thought that, his lips met my ear. “God I missed you, Emmy. So fucking bad.” The desperation in his voice pushed my lust into overdrive. He wanted me just as much as I wanted him.

I leaned back just far enough to rip my shirt over my head.

Thank God I wore matching underwear today
!

His mouth came down on the upper swell of my breast as his hands snaked under me and lifted me off the counter. He continued his sensual assault as he walked out of the kitchen and into what I could only assume was his bedroom.

I let out a yelp when he tossed me through the air and onto the bed. He was on me instantly, sucking my nipple into a tight bud through the lace of my bra. Arching my back, I tried to bring myself even closer to him as his hand trailed down my stomach to the waistband of my shorts. He had them unbuttoned and was leaning up to remove them before my brain jumpstarted again. My hands shot down in an attempt to cover the faded scar on my lower stomach but I wasn’t fast enough.

“What the hell is that?” he asked, pulling my hands away to study the scar more closely. “Emmy, what happened?”

The look of concern on his face nearly brought tears to my eyes. “It’s nothing. I had surgery a few years ago. Please Luke, don’t stop.” The thought of him pulling away was almost painful. “I need you,” I whispered.

He dove back down in a brutal, drugging kiss. “Baby, I need to taste you,” he murmured against my lips.

“
Yes
.”

He kissed his way down my body, removing my bra when he got to it then continued further until he reached my panties. He nuzzled his cheek against my inner thigh before slipping a finger past the elastic between my legs and pushing into me. I threw my head back against the pillows and let out an anguished moan. “Christ, you’re so wet for me. Tell me you want me, Emmy.”

“God, Luke. I want you.” What his hand was doing between my legs felt so good, I was having trouble breathing. I was on the verge of exploding when he pulled his hand away and jerked my panties off. Before I had a chance to protest, his mouth was on me, teasing my clit as he slipped two fingers back inside me.

“I always knew you’d taste this good. You’re so fuckin’ sweet, Emmy.” The knot that was coiling in my belly snapped at his words, and I was thrown over the edge into one of the best orgasms of my life. His name was the only word my brain could form. He stayed with me, dragging out every ounce of pleasure he could.

My body hadn’t even stopped shaking when Luke moved faster than I’d seen anyone move. Before I knew it, he was above me resting on his forearms on either side of my head. “You’re so beautiful when you come, baby girl.” He entered me with one powerful stroke, stretching me around him. The combination of pleasure and pain was almost too much to bear. “
Fuuuuuck
.” He let out a long groan as he pushed in to the hilt. “You’re so tight, baby. I don’t know how long I’m gonna last. You feel so fuckin’ good.”

Instantly, I remembered why it felt so much better than it ever had before. “Condom. Luke, you aren’t wearing a condom,” I said on an exhale as he moved above me.

His eyes met mine and the emotion I saw in them had a lump forming in my throat. “I’m clean, baby. I swear to God.”

I knew he wanted it like this. He wanted to feel me with nothing between us, but I’d made that mistake once and I wasn’t going to make it again. “I’m not on the pill, Luke.”

“Shit,” he spit out before reaching into the nightstand drawer by his bed. He pulled out of me and quickly rolled the condom down his length. The whole process only took seconds before he was pushing back inside of me. He stared down into my eyes as he started moving at a fast pace above me. I felt my climax starting to build back up and lifted my hips to meet each of his thrusts.

“I’ve missed you so much, baby,” he whispered into my ear and he powered into me, back and forth, over and over again until I was right at the edge.

“Oh God. Luke. Don’t stop.”

“Never, baby.” He moved faster and faster with each stroke until I threw my head back as the pleasure started to wash over me. “Look at me, baby girl. I want your eyes on mine when you come.”

I opened my eyes to meet his and that was all it took for me to go over. I moaned his name as my body clenched around him.

“So. Fucking. Beautiful,” he said with each thrust right before he groaned my name with his own release. He buried his face in my neck as we both came down. The last thing I recall before slipping into sleep was Luke whispering in my ear. “You’re mine, Emmy, and I’m not letting you go this time.”

CHAPTER 21

When I blinked my eyes open, the room was blanketed in darkness. I was disoriented and unsure of my surroundings until the hard wall against my back shifted. Abruptly, the images of the previous night came crashing down on me. I had had sex with Luke, the one person I should have stayed far away from. The anxiety came on so strong, I could have choked on it.

What the hell was I thinking
?! The problem was that I hadn’t been thinking at all. I let my body overrule my brain, and now I was stuck in an impossible situation. I knew I had to get out of there, and fast. I lifted Luke’s arm as slowly as I could and slid out from under it to the edge of the bed. I was feeling around for my clothes when I was suddenly jerked back against his solid chest, his arm like a vice around my waist.

“Where do you think you’re going?” he whispered in my ear before running his tongue around the outer edge and nipping my lobe.

It felt so good that my whole body shuddered, but it didn’t change anything. “I need to go home,” I replied quietly as I stared into the dark. “It’s late.”

He trailed his lips up and down my neck, and it took all of my willpower to keep myself from melting into him. “I know it’s late, so you should just lay back down. Besides, I’m not letting you go anywhere. I’m nowhere near done with you.” He rolled me onto my back, climbed between my legs and kissed me like his life depended on it.

I was completely breathless by the time he pulled away and reached over to his nightstand. “Luke, we can’t,” I said with more conviction than I felt. “We shouldn’t have had sex the first time. It was a mistake, and it can’t happen again.”

His room suddenly lit up, and I had to blink as my eyes adjusted to the light. He’d moved so quickly, I hadn’t even felt the bed shift before he turned on the lamp on the nightstand. “A mistake?”

Uh oh.

His anger was almost palpable, and I couldn’t help but cringe at the menacing look on his face. “Did you not hear me last night?” he asked sarcastically.

I pulled the sheet tight against me, trying to cover myself up. “What are you talking about?”

“After I nearly fucked you into a coma, I informed you that I wasn’t letting you go. Did you somehow miss that?”

His biting tone was quickly feeding my own anger. “Just because you said it, doesn’t mean I agree with it. You can’t make me do anything I don’t want to do, Luke.”

The grin that spread across his face was almost frightening. “That’s the beauty of it, baby. You want this just as much as I do. You were practically begging for me to be inside you.”

“Fuck you,” I hissed as I shot off the bed in search of my clothes.

“I plan to.” He grabbed me by the arm and pulled me back onto the bed before I could even blink. His hand was doing unimaginable things between my legs as he kissed me. “Tell me you don’t want me,” he said as he brought me closer and closer to orgasm. “If you can look me in the eye and say you don’t want me, I’ll let you go.”

I let out a whimper and he moved his fingers faster. “Luke, please.” If I wasn’t so close, I might have been embarrassed that he could make me beg so easily. But I didn’t care about anything except my own release at that point.

“What do you need, baby? Tell me what you need, and I’ll give it to you.”

“I need…” I couldn’t even form a complete sentence. “I need… inside…”

“You need me inside you?”

“Oh God,
yes
.”

He quickly donned a condom and turned me on my side. Lifting my leg and placing it over his hip, he entered me from behind so slowly I wanted to cry. I wanted to beg for him to move faster. Just as I opened my mouth to speak, his hand slid down my side and his fingers began to toy with my clit as he moved in and out. It was a sensory overload that had me crying out with an orgasm almost instantly.

Luke kept pace, dragging out every last bit of my release before finally picking up speed and falling over the edge right after.

***

“Savannah, open up!” I hollered as I pounded on the door and rang the bell over and over and over. “Open up! Open up! Open up! Openupopenupopenup!”

Her front door was thrown open and she stood in front of me in her Hello Kitty boxers,
Sons of Anarchy
t-shirt and robe with rubber duckies on it. “Someone better be dead, Emerson Grace. It’s six o’clock in the fucking morning on a Saturday!”

I shoved my way past her and threw myself down on her sofa. “Oh God,” I groaned into my hands. “Van, I messed up so bad.”

“What the hell’s going on?” she asked as she sat beside me. “And why do you have sex hair? Wait…” she inhaled a sharp gasp. “Noooooooooo! No, no, no! You didn’t.”

“Ohgodohgodohgodohgod!”

“How did this happen?” she shrieked.

“I don’t know. I don’t know.”

“Why the fuck do you keep repeating yourself over and over again?!”

We were both in freak-out mode. “I don’t
fucking know, Savannah!
I can’t think right now.”

“That’s because you just had your brains fucked out!”

I burst into tears.

“Okay. None of that… come on. Don’t cry.” Savannah never did well with tears. She sat down next to me and started rubbing my back. “I’m sorry I yelled. It’s really early. I haven’t had coffee and you just told me you had sex. It’s too early to process that kind of shit. I’m sorry.”

“What the hell was I thinking?” I asked on a sob.

“I don’t know, honey.”

I wiped my tears away and looked at her. “Twice, Savannah. We had sex two times. In one night! I haven’t had that much sex in six year!”

“I told you that your vow of celibacy was a bad idea. I said that, didn’t I? You can’t go without for that long, then be around a hot guy and not cave. It’s like putting cake in front of a fat kid and telling him ‘ha ha, you can’t eat it’. It’s not logical.”

“This is not helping
at all
.”

She raked her hands over her face. “Was it at least good?”

I couldn’t believe she just asked that. “Are you kidding? Are you being serious right now?”

“What?” she asked innocently. “It’s already done. You can’t
un
do it, so you might as well share.”

It was sad that I found her reasoning sound. “It was fucking amazing. I want to do it again and again.”

She just stared at me for a long time. “Then can you please explain to me why you’re at my house at the ass crack of dawn?”

I started twisting my hands in my lap. “I kinda snuck out of his bed and ran over here.”

“Say what now?”

I threw my hands up in exasperation. “I didn’t plan on spending the night, but I kind of fell asleep, then when I woke up and tried to sneak out the first time, he woke up and wouldn’t let me leave and we did it again, then I fell asleep again and when I woke up a little while ago, he must have been worn out because he didn’t wake up, so I ran over here because I’m freaking out, and he’s gonna be
super
pissed when he wakes up and I’m gone because he already told me that I’m his and he’s not letting me go and he seemed really, really serious.” I sucked in a deep breath after spitting that out as fast as possible.

She just sat there with her mouth hanging partially open, not saying anything for several seconds. “Are you gonna say anything?” I finally asked when I started getting uncomfortable.

“Is it possible to have an orgasm just from listening to you? Because I think I just totally did.”

“
Not helping
!”

“What do you want me to say, Emmy? You tell me you had sex that was so fantastic you passed out not just once, but twice and that he went all alpha and told you that you were his, and you expect me
not
to have this reaction? Sorry, not possible. That was totally fucking hot! And you know it causes me physical pain to say that, because I hate his ass.”

“What am I going to do, Van?”

“I honestly don’t know. But you better come up with something fast because if what you say is true, he’s gonna hunt your ass down once he wakes up.

I was so screwed and despite what happened the night before, not in the good way. I had so many conflicting emotions that I couldn’t tell up from down. On the one hand, I
really
wanted a re-do of the night before, but on the other, I wanted to go home, pack my shit and jump on the first flight to Mexico to get away from Luke. My walls had been completely demolished, and there was no building them back up. I knew it was just a matter of time before he came looking for me. I needed a plan… fast.