Play It Again, Charlie (63 page)

“It's not wrong to want it, Charlie.” He jerked his attention back to Jeanine at the realization that she'd heard him and then blinked dizzily at her finger in his face. She was tipsy. She had to be. “Anyway, prove it's going to end,” she challenged him. “Listen to me. I need a drink too.”

“I thought it was your turn to listen to
me
and to drive.” He remembered that much.

“You planning on stopping soon?” She rolled her eyes when he shut his mouth. “Then I will have time to sober up. And I'll sip it. Hey!” She leaned over the bar again. “I need a woman bartender or I'll get ignored all night in this place.” She waved her money around and suddenly a bartender was in front of them. “One beer and another shot of tequila,” she told him, then she twisted to face Charlie again. “Anyway, prove it's going to end,” she repeated herself while putting her cash on the bar.

“It did.” The proof was his life. Jeanine snorted.

“Faulty logic, Charlie. Tsk. Now take your shot as punishment.”

At home, he sipped it. But at home he only drank the expensive bottles his family brought up on visits. This was so cheap it burned, but he downed it anyway. It was going to hurt tomorrow, but if he drank enough now he might even feel good.

His stomach complained again. “I'm too old for this,” he gasped when he was done. He wanted to close his eyes.

“And yet still so drunk.” Jeanine was amused. Charlie opened eyes that had actually
been
closed for too long for it to be a blink and saw her expectant look.

“What?”

“So call him.” That again. As though he didn't want to and hadn't tried.

“He doesn't want me to, and I don't blame him. It's his right and— ”

“I think it's time for the question you almost never ask yourself, Charlie.” Jeanine paused dramatically and got up. “What do
you
want?” she explained, when Charlie only stared back at her, and her sparkling gaze told him that his answer was so obvious he didn't have to say it.

It was on his tongue anyway, like the lingering flavor of lime.

“I have to pee. Don't go crazy over here while I'm waiting in that line.” She said it almost exactly as Will would have, as though despite her words nothing would make her happier than Charlie going a little crazy while she was gone.

He put his hand on her seat when someone crept toward it, fixing a total stranger with his sternest glare until they backed off. Then he looked after Jeanine and saw her standing in a line outside the bathroom door.

Call him, she'd said, as though it was that easy. He had. Will hadn't answered. He could call now and get the same response. He pulled out his phone to prove it to her and idly took a drink of her beer to wet his lips as he looked over his call history. His previous attempts were still there, as sharp as the memory of each call going to voice mail.

Will was fine, he told himself. He was still communicating with his friends, obviously. Chris had all but said he was at his sister's, and... . Charlie paused and looked at his call history again until he found the unfamiliar number of Will's sister's phone.

His mouth felt sticky, and more beer did nothing to help it. His heartbeat was louder than the music as he hunched over his phone and let his finger slip on the “Call” button. He shoved the beer away at the sound of ringing.

The quick pick up took him by surprise.

“I know this number.” Will's sister was dry. “I even have it labeled, believe it or not.” Charlie opened his mouth and felt almost ill at how cool she was. “This is Charlie.” He had to cover his other ear, and even then she was so quiet he almost missed that.

This had been a mistake. “I'm sorry to bother you,” he pushed out anyway. “I just... .” He inhaled. “I need, I
want
"— it was hard to say the word, he had no idea why—"to know that Will is okay.” She wasn't responding, at least not that he could hear. He wanted to grab the beer and couldn't if he wanted to hear anything. “Will, he won't take my calls, and I figured he might be on your couch— I mean, that you'd seen him.”

“Is he okay?” Will's sister repeated. “Well, I've had to sit through Julia Roberts dying more times than I care to admit to.” She said it as though Charlie ought to know what that meant, and because he did, he briefly shut his eyes. “But he's okay.” She exhaled.

Charlie did too, not quite relieved, not with Will upset. He didn't get a chance to explain himself.

“I didn't expect that question.”

He wasn't sure what to say to that and wet his lips. “Will says I worry too much.”

“There's nothing wrong with a little caution. Sometimes he could use some.” There was noise in the background Charlie couldn't make out that made it even more difficult to hear for one moment, and then he heard that voice, loud with alarm.

“Who are you talking to?” Will demanded, somewhere near his sister, while she ignored him and kept talking.

“But I suppose there can be too much too.”

“Too much?” Charlie had to stand up at the sound of Will's voice, but then swayed and bumped into whoever was next to him. He vaguely noticed it was Jeanine, watching him with a hopeful expression, but then forgot about her when Will spoke.

“Seriously, bitch, who are you talking to?” It was too loud around him to make out anything but the words themselves.

“I don't like people who hurt my brother.” The sister was breathless, and Charlie figured out why right as Will gasped, “Oh my God, you're
not
!” And there was the sound of a scuffle on the other end.

Charlie looked away from Jeanine as the noise quieted down and then shook his head, though it only made his world spin.

“I didn't mean... .” It didn't matter what he'd meant, he'd done it, hadn't he? “Is he really? I never wanted to hurt him. I just didn't want to scare him off.” She wasn't saying anything. Maybe it was exactly as stupid as it sounded. Why was he even explaining to Will's sister? It didn't matter. This time Charlie had done the leaving, before Will had ever left the car. “Will is... .”

“Charlie?” Will breathed his name, clearly shocked, and Charlie froze. For a long, long moment his heart raced and his hands felt numb, then the crowd pushed him around and he stumbled into the bar. Jeanine was asking him something, and he waved her off.

“
Will
.”

“Charlie?” He had no idea what was in his voice to make Will's go up so high. “Are you all right?”

“I'm drunk,” Charlie confessed and felt his heartbeat finally start to slow down at Will's small, startled laugh. A moment later, when he couldn't add anything else, Will got even louder.

“Oh my God, you
are
.” He was amazed for all of a minute and then he dropped his voice, and Charlie couldn't hear well enough to tell what he was thinking. “Why are you drunk-dialing my sister?”

“I need you.” It just came out. Jeanine choked on what was left of her beer. The person next to him turned to him with wide eyes. Charlie ignored them both, hot all over. He struggled to think. “You promised to come get me, to drive me home if I ever got drunk. I'm drunk.”

“Yes, I got that.” Will didn't laugh this time. “You called me for a ride?” There was something in the question Charlie didn't understand until Will elaborated. “You'd trust me to do that?”

It hurt more than the quiet and everything he'd made Will hold back.

“Yes.” He nodded, though Will couldn't see, and dropped his hand as the silence went on and Will still hadn't answered. Then Will pulled in a breath.

“I'm, like, an hour away. Unless... where are you? Why is it so loud? Is that music?”

“I don't care. I can wait.” Charlie was aware that, sober, he would never have let that emerge so breathlessly. Will sucked in air and Charlie hesitated. Then, before he did anything reckless, or maybe to speed things along and ensure that he would, Jeanine grabbed his phone from him.

“Hey, Will? Hi. I am sure you remember the bar downtown by the sushi place? I can't remember the name. Well, that's where we are. He'll be here. See you then.” She murmured something else and then gave Charlie his phone back. When he put it to his ear, Will was gone and it was just dead air.

He stared at her and felt his stomach flip when she grinned and offered to buy him another shot to help pass the time.

He wasn't aware of much after that except for the spinning world around him and too much sound and the trembling, sick movements of his stomach that had only gone away when Jeanine had dragged him outside into the cool air, and he'd nearly fallen into some bushes as he'd thrown up his last three shots of that bad tequila.

Only on a bad reaction to a medication had he ever thrown up like that and had it hurt. It served Jeanine right that she'd had to hover over him and offer embarrassed explanations to everyone walking by. There was an ache in his back that meant he was in a pain he couldn't feel yet from sitting on the sidewalk, but he kept his eyes closed. Without looking at his watch he knew it had been longer than an hour since he'd talked to Will, but he didn't want to move to find out exactly how much longer.

Jeanine was talking above him again, though it took Charlie too long to notice that she was offering more than an apology to whoever was approaching. He opened his eyes and looked at the entrance to the bar across the parking lot and then over at Will, who was only a few feet away and staring at Charlie. His mouth was open.

“Will!” Charlie tried to stand up, which involved pulling on Jeanine to get to his feet and then gasping when even through the tequila haze he could feel his hip protest. Will looked stunned for a moment, and then he was frowning and stepping closer when Charlie tripped and nearly landed on Jeanine, who had to fight to not fall over.

Charlie kept himself upright for the space of two fast breaths, and then Will came forward again as if he was going to catch him, but he stopped and pulled his arms back to his chest.

“Oh, wow, you really are drunk.” He was so soft and
there
. Since he wouldn't move, Charlie leaned toward him. He skimmed a hand over the top of Will's hair and watched Will shiver before Will pulled away. He met Charlie's gaze, and the streetlight didn't hide the way his cheeks flushed before he looked away. “Oh, look at you,” he exclaimed, then he wrinkled his nose. “And smell you.”

Charlie wiped a hand over his mouth and swallowed the gum Jeanine had given him, but other than that, Will seemed to forget about any vomit smell. He was glancing from Charlie to Jeanine, and he did not look happy.

“Have you eaten? Has he eaten?” He stared fiercely at Jeanine. “His Nana was very clear about that.” He stopped when Charlie reached over and touched his hair again. It seemed longer, but that was probably in his mind. Will wasn't wearing a jacket either. He had on a loose T-shirt, so his arms were bare, and he had dark circles under his eyes.

Will turned to blink at him, like he wasn't quite sure what he was seeing. Charlie stared back at him until Will licked his lips and turned to Jeanine, who was talking and gesturing between them.

“Never seen him throw up before,” she huffed. “Can't help what they serve here. I'm Jeanine, by the way.”

“This is Will, Jeanine. Will,” Charlie sighed happily and felt warm again when Will did a double take before giving him another long, surprised look. A small laugh erupted out of Jeanine. If possible, Will looked even more confused. And adorable.

“Yes, Charlie.” Jeanine poked Will in the chest to get his attention, and they both frowned at her. “You
will
get him home and in one piece.” Will backed up and looked around before rubbing his chest and glancing sideways at Charlie. “I am serious.” Jeanine only poked him again. Charlie opened his mouth to tell her to stop, but she rolled right on. “He needs someone to see to him, not just someone who wants a daddy.”

“Jeanine!” Charlie shook his head at her. It was a mistake that made him even dizzier, and he tipped to one side before righting himself. Will stared at Jeanine. After a minute he bit his lip and shrugged.

“I'll get him home,” he promised, not looking at Charlie, and Charlie frowned and came forward again. This time his hand went from Will's hair to his cheek to draw his attention up. Will looked tired, and there was the faintest wrinkle between his eyes for the first moment that Charlie held him and then he swallowed and caught his breath.

“Why are you looking at me like that?”

Charlie couldn't even feel the night air. “I'm happy to see you. Not like that,” he added, aware that it was a quote and he was saying it wrong. But he couldn't think of what it was supposed to be, not like Will would have. “Not like... never mind.”

The little wrinkle became a line as Will frowned and pulled away. “Yeah, never mind, whatever.”

“Anyway, kiddo, I'm out,” Jeanine told Charlie, though he didn't look at her, he just nodded. “There's your cane, don't forget it. Will, nice to finally meet you.” Maybe she was waving, jiggling her keys. Her footsteps got quiet, then disappeared. Will's frown got worse.

“Wait, you had a ride home this whole time?”

He looked back at Charlie. Charlie blinked.

“You promised.”

“Who are you and where's my Charlie?” Will was incredulous, then stopped himself. “I mean, the Charlie I knew.” He bent down to get the cane. When he popped back up he seemed startled to find Charlie back in his space.

“I thought you didn't like that Charlie.” Charlie was aware that his reasoning wasn't perfect at the moment, but he did his best to think clearly.

“What?” Will shook his head and backed up again. “Just... come on.” He waved and Charlie looked over until he saw his car. He took a step and landed on the pavement and not the sidewalk. “Shit.” He felt that.

“Sweet Baby J,” Will exclaimed into Charlie's shirt as he slid under his arm and started to move with him. He grunted when Charlie fell against him. “She could have at least helped me get you in the car,” he complained when they bumped into it. Then he looked up with his mouth open when Charlie straightened and pulled his hands away from Will's body.

“Sorry,” he apologized as seriously as he could, but it didn't make the strange expression on Will's face go away. His stomach tightened again, and he shivered. “Sorry.” He made sure to speak very clearly. “Thank you for the ride home.”