Playing Fate (Endgame Series Book 1) (23 page)

“You ready for next week?” I shrug. Mason lives for the season. “What’s wrong with you?”

“My sitter quit. I’m a fucking statistic as a teenage, single parent—a father at that. I have to ask Mommy and Daddy for help because Julie’s own mother didn’t want her, and the closest thing I’ve had to love decided she didn’t want me. I’m thinking of quitting the team because I don’t know how to juggle my life.”

I can tell he feels bad. “One month. Give it one month, and if you still feel the same way, or it’s affecting Julie, I’ll support you one hundred percent.”

“One month.” I know what’s going to happen. At least when it ends I’ll have his support instead of disappointment. My endgame walked away and may cause me to end playing the game I love.

I love Julie more, and that’s what it comes down to. Always.

Avery walking in with Julie is a shock to my system. Her little hands clapping, her big eyes wide as saucers, and her smile lighting up my world. I hesitantly step to her, and she thrusts her chubby arms out so I can take her, kicking her legs in excitement. Babbling incessantly, I can see her two bottom teeth have popped through her gums. I smile through my tears and feel her weight settle in my arms. I inhale her scent, burying my face in her neck. “Someone is happy to see you.” Avery smiles at us. “That’s a beautiful picture.”

I nod, knowing I’m wrong for feeling so content in this moment. I’m going to hell for coveting someone else’s child, for praying this was my actuality as it once had been, for wishing the family she belonged to was non-existent. A reserved seat in the VIP section of hell was waiting for me, one I’d gladly succumb to for this moment.

“Why do you have Julie?” I’m not complaining. Just curious.

“Deacon had a late practice.” I nod. Of course, I want to question that explanation, but I don’t. Not my place anymore.

“Do you mind if I feed her?” I miss it. I miss her. I miss him. I miss everything.

“That’s perfect. I need to finish a paper real quick.” I situate her in the portable chair and dig through her bag. “Oh, no carrots for you, little missy.” I chuck them in the trash wondering who the hell bought those. I stop the nasty thoughts running in my head. “Green beans and apples. Such fine dining.” I’m cooing and talking to her, and I miss Emberlee walk in.

She stops and stares, digging her phone from her designer purse, ready to call Adriane, I’m sure. This is a shit storm I don’t need. “Call off your dogs, Emberlee. I’m keeping her busy for Avery.” That seems to satisfy her, and she walks to her room. Avery comes dashing down the hallway from her room at warp speed as I finish wiping Julie’s mouth.

She makes sure everything is back in the bag and picks Julie up. “I have to take her back to the house.” Her face contorts in worry and regret.

“I understand.” I’m sure Deacon and Adriane will be pissed when they find out I had any time with her.

“Sorry,” she whispers. I decide a soak in the tub is what I need, and when I hear Emberlee’s voice, I decide to turn on my music . . . extra loud.

“You need to be careful who you let keep Julie.” Emberlee is narking on Avery. “Yeah, I came home to Saylor playing Mommy. I know you wanted to spend some alone time with Deacon, but just be careful.” I slam the bubble bath against the counter. She’s acting like I’m a serial killer, and I’d love to remind her it was me taking care of Julie, loving her, when her dipshit friend was nowhere to be found. I refrain…barely.

I climb in the hot water, begging it to relax my muscles. Calgon. Damn false advertisement. I dress in my sleep clothes and make my way to the kitchen for a drink. “Hope you enjoyed your time with Julie because it won’t happen again.” She’s such a bitch.

“I don’t know what I did to you, but you can stop being hateful. I got the memo loud and clear, Emberlee. No reason to keep repeating it.”

“You tried to take a place that wasn’t yours.”

“I didn’t take anything that wasn’t offered to me,” I remind her. I wasn’t the one who broke Deacon and Adriane up.

“You were just a place holder.” Her words slice.

“What do you want from me?” I hate my voice for betraying me. Wobbling, on the verge of tears.

“To remember your place.”

I nod. “Noted.” I take refuge in my room and pull up the apartment finder website. I can’t do this for another four months. Everyone has a breaking point, and I just reached mine . . . with some help from an evil bitch.

Mason/Caden/Avery

Mission Playing Fate

“What the hell was so important that you interrupted my afternoon sex session?” Caden storms in the house.

“Make it quick, Mason.” Avery is dancing a jig covered in paint.

“No shit, Avery. Caden you could have taken your normal five minutes and finished.”

“Fuck you, Mason.” Caden glowers at me.

“We have a mission. It could be dangerous. Met with belligerent lovesick minions. You may be called names. You may get shit thrown at you, maybe fists, but Shortstop’s won’t hurt. If you wish to accept, you will be rewarded by spoiling many nieces and nephews that come from the mating of Deacon and Saylor.”

“What the actual fuck are you smoking?” Avery stares at me.

“Holy fuck, you’re dumber than I thought.” Caden throws a water bottle at me. Good thing I’m the pitcher— his aim sucks.

“Our hands are tied, so we need to be creative. Here’s the low down. Deacon is miserable. Saylor has no idea he and Adriane aren’t together. Deacon made us promise him in Colorado we wouldn’t get involved, that we would tell Saylor nothing. Stubborn grasshopper he is.” Both of my protégés are staring at me waiting for my UFO to come take me home. “He’s losing his sitter and said he may quit baseball. He and Saylor worked their schedules out so if this happened Julie wouldn’t be affected. I asked him for one month so we have twenty-nine days to implement Operation Playing Fate.”

“I’m lost.” Avery is staring at Caden, and he doesn’t seem to follow.

“Deacon and Saylor need to fix their shit.” They both nod. “We have to make that happen, and it’s going to be hard but doable.” They agree. I have a plan. “Time for Master Mason to teach you something. Here’s the plan…” We all pore over the diagrams and notes I’ve drawn. Careful execution without getting caught will be key to this mission.

After we conclude I’m a genius and my DNA should be cloned for the greater good of America, we toast our success with a beer. “T-minus twenty-nine days, bitches.” Our bottles clink, our smiles appear, our feet prop on the coffee table, our bond is strengthened. Un-fucking-breakable is what we are.

Our first away game is tomorrow, and the good thing about a long bus ride is I’ll be able to finish my coursework. I hate leaving Julie, and as the month is coming to a close, I know my decision. Mason and Caden know it, as well. Every day one of them or Avery is at my house helping me some way. It isn’t hard to manage while I’m at home. For practices, Avery is able to cover, so all-in-all, my mom is keeping Julie three to four hours a day. She begs for extensions all the time.

Funny how it didn’t bother me when I thought Julie would be home with Saylor. I was still going to travel, but knowing they’d be at my house, Julie able to adhere to her schedule . . . at her house with her things . . . stability for her is important to me. There are so many unknown variables in her life. How will she feel as she learns Adriane didn’t want to be her mother? Having a teen single dad? Savages for uncles? A schedule, love, security—that’s what I want for her, and being gone three nights some weeks isn’t the way to give it to her. Shuffled back and forth, a different face waking her up, feeding her, bathing her. That doesn’t work for me.

I’ve heard it all. Kids are resilient. You aren’t harming her. She’ll be a better person for having a happy father, so do what you love. I could record that shit and play it while I slept and the subliminal message wouldn’t sink in. I have a way I want my daughter raised, and this isn’t it.

“How you holding up, man?” Caden is quiet but observant.

“Two more weeks,” I tell him. Yes, I’ll miss it. Yes, I hate giving it up. I feel like the choice is taken from me, and I have to do it.

“If you know that’s the outcome, why keep going?”

“I promised Mason. I gave him a month, and I feel like my situation has changed everything with us. The least I can do is keep my word.”

“Keep your head and your heart in the game. Things could change.”

I shrug, “Maybe.” He knows I’m not feeling it.

“Head
and
heart, Deacon.” I go back to my textbook and let his words sink in. Nothing I can do about leaving Julie for two more weeks, so I’m going into each game like it’s the playoffs. Take no prisoners attitude. Hopefully I give my teammates one hell of a start to the season.