Pride Over Pity (20 page)

“I think I’m going to pass out,” he said quietly.

Three pushes later I had a new baby and (thankfully) a fully-conscious husband. I heard Javi say, “It’s a boy!” and all the worry and anxiety melted away as the doctor placed my baby in my arms. Lincoln Marshall Marroquin was born on November 16, 2013 at 4:28 p.m. He weighed a healthy eight pounds and six ounces and was twenty-one inches long. He was perfect just like Isaac.

Two days later, we were able to bring Lincoln home to his Pinterest-inspired, gender-neutral bedroom. I had put our dogs at the kennel for a few days to eliminate the insistent barking, so that was one potentially crazy scene out of the way. But, despite all our preparations, bringing a new baby home was chaotic. Even though Isaac had started pre-K in September, we were still adjusting to that schedule. Thankfully Javi had taken ten days off from work so I wouldn’t be alone in taking care of two children, yet our house was still a storm of disorder.

Providing undivided attention to two young children in different developmental stages, proved to be an enormous challenge. Nursing Lincoln left me with no free hands to hold Isaac’s artwork and proclaim him the next Picasso. Javi adapted to the dynamic. The transition for Isaac was my main concern but Javi put me at ease, ensuring Isaac never felt left out or ignored.

Issac and Lincoln.

Isaac, 4, laying with his baby brother Lincoln, 11 weeks old.

Isaac’s enthusiasm was adorable. At first, he seemed a little disinterested, but as time passed he learned to help burp Lincoln and became very engaged. He can’t wait until Lincoln is able to talk and play and neither can I. It means so much to me that my boys will be able to experience that special bond shared by siblings. It’s something I never had. Isaac will be the best big brother ever and I know he can’t wait to teach Lincoln all about
Toy Story
.

I’m excited to see how our lives together will unfold, even if that means going through some stressful custody battles to get there. In October of 2013, we had a pretrial. 2014 will hopefully bring about a healthy agreement between Jo and me. There haven’t been any new arrangements yet, so for now Jo gets Isaac Thursday through Sunday every other week and then Thursday into Friday during the alternate week. As much as I can disagree or sometimes not get along with Jo, I don’t see it being like that forever. I want us to have a healthy relationship for Isaac’s sake.

Nursing Lincoln before the reunion show, February 2014

My friend and cast mate, Leah, is living proof that you can make one whole family out of two. She and the father of her two children, Corey, have both remarried and Leah loves that his new wife, Miranda, treats their two girls like they were her own. It’s beautiful to see Corey and Leah both happily remarried, while maintaining a healthy relationship with one another for their daughters.

That is exactly what I want. Isaac should never feel as though he is the center of the rope that Jo and I are both tugging from opposite ends. We both need to let go, so Isaac has the freedom to move from one side to the other. Hopefully soon, there won’t be sides. It’ll be a complete circle, our own unique family.

Chapter 27

The Mermaid and Dory

Astrology has depicted my personality and the branches blooming from it. The Pisces symbol’s meaning has led me to take an interest in exploring how my astrological sign relates to me. I’ve also become obsessed with another water symbol, which represents an image I have maintained and has even spawned a parody Twitter account. Oddly enough, it’s for my hair and yes, it humors me. Ariel may rock the red, but I have the long blonde hair giving Rapunzel a run for her money. The combination of exaggeratedly long, REAL hair and my astrological sign has branded me as a mythological creature of the sea.

I like to swim deeply and stay away from shallow waters. If I pop up to land, people try to take advantage of my uniqueness and sell me as a story. By now you should have guessed . . . mermaid. I’m a mermaid! Yes, you heard me correctly. As ridiculous as it may sound, I truly believe in the symbolic nature of these romantic beings.

As for astrology, Pisces are of the sea too. The two fish represent quite a lot about me. I’m past the daily horoscope check. My interest goes much deeper than that. Sometimes the horoscopes are so on point and sometimes they are so very off, but the Pisces sign and what it stands for is what I believe in because it so accurately reflects who I am.

Pisces are afraid of ridicule. Pisces are misfortunate beings. We are open to change. The sign represents how I’ve adapted to every fishhook thrown in my direction. The Pisces attitude and personality has matched up to mine like a mitten passed down from generation to generation. Like fish in the sea, I’ve learned to adapt to survive.

As I keep on growing, the next step is more education. I’ll be able to pursue a real passion for a career and attend a college. Broadcast journalism has been calling me ever since I began doing voiceovers for MTV and increasingly became more active in creating podcasts. I want to be active, pursue my own reports, and perhaps not shy away from television. We’ll see. First, I have to get a Bachelor’s degree. I applied to Delaware State and hope to focus on Radio/TV/Film as a major. I want to be in front of the camera because it’s not only comfortable but something I want to explore more.

Hope for the future and the current sunshine in my present has brought upon a joyful spirit. I’m the happiest I’ve ever been. All positive vibes and happiness are here. I’m done living under the scrutiny of people who want to see me fail. I’ve done my best, even if that doesn’t meet everyone’s standards.

Sure, I’ll still keep the mermaid hair but I’m letting go of the tail and scales. They’re too flashy for my taste anyway. I can swim freely without having anyone tugging me back—unless it’s Ellen DeGeneres. If Ellen would ever give me the honor to step on her set, I’d follow Dory around the ocean forever.

Just keep swimming!

Isaac and Lincoln

ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS

Kailyn Lowry:

Above all, I’d like to first thank the two best little human beings on the planet. Isaac and Lincoln, you both are my heart. Thank you to every single person in my life who has shown complete resilience and stood by me even when I didn’t deserve it. To MTV and the Teen Mom crew, I am so appreciative of the opportunity you have bestowed upon me. The blessings and support I have received over the years are due to your patience and kindness toward me. Thank you all so much.

Adrienne Wennner:

My unconventional thanks goes out to my lifelong hero, The Edge. You’ve always inspired me to reach for perfection within all of my aspirations and to be extraordinary every day. To my two unaware counterparts from the West, Mike McCready and Eddie Vedder, this is for you. Also, thank you to my chosen family for your unconditional support, love, and enthusiasm.

AUTHOR BIO

Kailyn Lowry
is a cast member of
16 & Pregnant
and
Teen Mom 2
. She lives in Dover, Delaware with her husband Javi, her sons, Isaac and Lincoln, and their two dogs, Bear and Gizmo. Kail loves spending time with her family, decorating her home via DIY Pinterest projects, and soaking up the sun on the beach.

Adrienne Wenner
is a writer, photographer, and rock ’n’ roll soul residing in Brooklyn. She is a Hofstra University graduate with a B.A. in journalism and fine arts. When Adrienne isn’t scribbling stories down, she can be found at the front row of a U2 or Pearl Jam show.