Princess of the Damned (30 page)

“
He’s not the faithful type,” Trent pointed out.

Nala leaned over to Sayan’s side of the table and then tapped on his hand. “Will you always be faithful to me, Sayan?” Her pale green eyes begged for a reply.

“
Of course,” he played along and kissed her hand. She was putting on a show for her brothers, but he couldn’t figure out why she didn’t want them to know.

Sayan paid close attention to Trent’s face, but there was no change in his expression. He tore the loaf of bread into halves and shared it with Nala. They both took a few small bites and then left the rest on the plate. His eating pattern was similar to Nala’s, in that they barely ate anything at all. The consumption of food was just for show. Their other brother, Alex, was stuffing himself up to his eyeballs. Where did the food go in that slender figure of his?

Sayan noticed the pair of twin blades resting at Alex’s waist. “Can you fight or are those just for show?”

Alex looked up from his plate. “Are you talking to me?”

“
I was getting to that part, Sayan,” Nala said. “Alex volunteers to help you with your conquests.”

“
How noble of you,” Sayan complimented. Even if the boy is immortal, if he didn’t know how to use his weapons, he was pretty close to useless. As long as the boy didn’t distract him during battle, there was no real harm in taking him under his wing.

“
Don’t make me a general right away,” Alex said with a bright smile. “It will be like starting out on level 1! What was that game I used to play? I forgot the name. How could I forget the name? I used to play all the time after school! I reached the 5000 kills count once playing Lubu! God, what was that game called! Argh, my brain went to mush!”

The boy was ranting on about incomprehensible things. He drowned out the boy’s voice and focused on Nala. She had been stirring her soup for a while now, but hadn’t taken a sip. When she noticed he was looking, she quickly ate a few spoonfuls. A droplet fell onto her chin. His right thumb reached out to wipe it off for her, but Trent beat him to it.

Nala’s eyes met Trent’s and they both got stranded for a long moment before she pushed to her feet. “I remember I have something to do.”

Sayan’s eyes followed her as she exited the dining hall.

“
You and I never had the time to talk, Trent.” Sayan folded his hands and rested them on the table. “Since you will be my brother-in-law soon, do you have any words or advice?”

“
No,” Trent replied straightforwardly.

“
Usually brothers would say something like ‘if you hurt my sister, I will hunt you down like a dog’.”

“
Nala is not one who would get hurt easily. And if you ever cross the line, she knows when to leave. I am in no place to say anything regarding her personal affairs.”

“
Not even a little jealousy at all?” Sayan watched his expression very carefully, but could not detect any reaction.

“
You must understand, Your Majesty.” Trent faced him directly. It was the first time their eyes met. Trent’s clear blue eyes were much more imposing than he had previously thought. “Compared to us, your lives are very fleeting. I cannot recall how many…” He dropped the sentence midway. “I think it is better if I retire early tonight. Goodnight, Your Majesty.”

He could not recall
how many different men had crossed her path and wanted to possess her like property. That was what he was going to say, but decided that it was better to keep silent. Perhaps there was once a time when let himself fall victim to a thing called jealousy, but the psychological trauma of it all was too much for him to handle. Half of him was human, but the other half of him was always dictating his life. Unlike full-blooded demons who could only feel a very limited range of emotions, he was complete with all of them. Then again, like the other demons, the intensity of his emotions could get out of hand, and that was an incredibly dangerous path to walk. It could lead to self-destruction along with other consequences.

He needed to rely on his sensibility and he came close to snapping a number of times. He could not allow that anymore. If his temper remotely resembled his father’s, then it would prove to be a problem.

Trent sat on the wide window sill and leaned the back of his head against the window frame. His vivid blue eyes stared at the moon just above the garden. It would be nice to have Raya by his side on nights such as this, but only if she could find her way to him herself.

Nala tossed and turned in her bed
. It was probably the habit of fifteen years living as human to be in bed in the first place. Sleep was nothing more than a waste of time and all she had was time. Trying to figure out what to do with her time was the challenging part. There were so few pleasures left in the world.

She had sensed his presence in the hallway and heard him enter her chamber, but she didn’t bother to move a muscle. She heard the sound of rustling fabric and then felt the bed slightly tilting in his direction. A pair of strong arms embraced her and pulled her toward him, until her back nested against his bare chest. He let out an exhausted sigh and then buried his face in her hair.

“
Your bedroom is next door,” she reminded him.

“
Your scent helps me sleep a little better,” Sayan replied and snugged her even closer. “I struggle with insomnia.”

“
What did I say about touching me without my permission?”

“
Didn’t I also say that you are mine until you can kill me yourself?” He pressed a kiss on the nape of her neck. “When we fought, I could not concentrate on work and I desperately need my concentration right now.”

“
You don’t seem to get it, human. The woman you knew doesn’t exist.”

He rose up and forced her face to turn toward him. “I think you are the one who doesn’t grasp the situation. The boy you once knew is also long gone. If you prefer bitter to sweet, I will do my best to entertain you. If you don’t like tender melody, then I can also change the tune. I am a man who obtains what I want by any means necessary and I can tell you with certainty that I want you. So what if you regained your memories? What does it matter if you are not human? To me, Nala, I only see you. And I will have you.”

She bit the finger that had gotten too close to her lips. He didn’t flinch away. Instead his eyes passionately watched his blood stain her lips.

“
What I want to know is why you are hiding it from your brothers?”

“
My reasons have nothing to do with you.” She turned her body toward him. “But I will tell you anyway. If Trent knows that I am back to my old self, he would definitely run away again. I intend for him to stay here until the wedding, even if it is only a few days.”

“
Why would he run away if he knows?”

She ignored his question. “I will allow you to act like my loving husband until then.”

“
I will not negotiate with you on this. You will marry me simply because of me and no other reasons. Do you understand?”

“
Yes, my love,” she replied sweetly, “for now.”

“
Forever,” he corrected her. “Or at least until you become my widow, but not before then. I would kiss those pretty lips of yours until they’re bruised, but I am too tired tonight. I just want to fall asleep with you in my arms. If you still want to fight with me, we will continue tomorrow.”

He pecked a kiss on her lips and then gathered her neatly into his arms. His chest was warm against her cheek and she could hear the steady beat of his heart. It did feel very nice to be wanted.

“
You smell like… good memories,” he breathed.

It was definitely nice to be wanted.

That damn nightmare again.

As soon as he closed his eyes, the same nightmare returned to haunt him. Sayan reached out to the other side of the bed and she was still lying next to him, breathing softly against his arm. He could finally find relief in knowing that it was a dream and nothing more.

In his dream, he saw himself as a fifteen year old boy and Nala looked the same as she did then. A distorted version of his memories brought him back to the scene when he had just killed the Western Prime Minister’s son. He was frightened to see the blood on his hands and the dead corpse on the floor, but then his body was filled with rage when he saw Nala’s face soak in tears and in a half-torn gown. The only thought that ran through his head was that he needed to run away before they found him. He needed to take Nala with him to safety. They fled into the desert, but they could not outrun the horse of the Western Prince. The stallion effortlessly dashed through the sand as the prince leaned over and snatched Nala from the ground. Their connecting hands were abruptly torn from each other.

Sayan let out an irritated sigh. He couldn’t believe he kept getting tricked by the same dream over and over. The scenario didn’t seem all that real, but every time he woke from it, he would break out in cold sweats. Only when he found her safely by his side was the spell of the nightmare broken.

His gaze softened when he stared at her sleeping face. He gently kissed her velvety cheek before he rose from the bed. It was almost dawn, so he might as well get up early and get more work done. The Southern King was planning to mobilize his army to attack, and he needed to prepare his people for the upcoming war. Although their military powers rival each other, the Southern King had Lilan as ally. That woman and her lackeys should not be underestimated. If Lilan told the truth, then they were the ones responsible for annihilating the Eastern Kingdom in such a short amount of time. He had seen what her lackeys could do and couldn’t be more impressed with their inhuman strength and speed.

It was a win-all or lose-all situation, and he didn’t have the confidence in winning. The odds were stacked against him. Even if he managed to win, his army would suffer a catastrophic loss of lives. The thought of making widows out of wives and orphans out of children sickened him in the stomach. Great men in history built their glories over the blood and sweat of the lives they took. He didn’t want to be a great man. He just wanted to be an ordinary man with an ordinary life and an ordinary love.

He still yearned for the little piece of land and dozens of pure white sheep. He would be a good husband, and if Nala agreed to be the mother of his children, he would be a good father as well. They would spend cold days gathered around the fireplace for warmth and the company of one another.

The life of an ordinary man was never meant for him.

In the end, those images were only hopes and dreams of a man who no longer had control of his own destiny. He had chosen to walk on this path and he must see to it that he continued to walk it until the very end. He could not back down, even if he wanted to.

Sayan paused by the door and decided to return to bed. He woke her up with a gentle kiss and sincerely looked into her pale green eyes.

“
Nala, would you bear my child?”

If she were a human girl
, she would have found the request endearing. As a demon, somehow it felt like a stab in the chest first thing in the morning. Should she explain to him that her kind was never meant for procreation? Her existence is already a miracle on its own. Her father didn’t have a need for offspring and didn’t want any, but fate pranked him into falling in love with a mortal woman. The irony of it all is by some astronomical chance Trent was conceived their first night together.

Fate has a wicked sense of humor.

Nala realized that she had not given him a reply. She didn’t know how long she had dazed off into her own thoughts. His dark brown eyes were waiting for her and he looked as though he could not breathe until she gave him an answer. She could crush him so easily with a few words, but she decided that it was probably a line that she should not cross.

“
If by some miracle that I have your child, I will keep it.” Although she hid some facts, it was a truthful answer.

The burst of joyous expression on his face surprised her. He embraced her tightly in his arms and repeatedly thanked her in breathless whispers. Suddenly she felt like a liar. Argh, why was she concerned with his feelings anyway?

“
Let go of me!” She shoved him back. “You are such an annoying human.”

“
Even your verbal abuse will not be able to ruin my day.” He stole a quick kiss and then headed out of the door. “I will try to come back early tonight.”

If he wanted children, then perhaps she should do a good deed and match him up with a human woman.

She didn’t say yes
, but it was close enough to a yes.

He wanted to concentrate on the meeting, but his mind was too occupied with the thoughts of tiny little hands and feet. He wanted to put in more effort training his soldiers, but he was too distracted with whether the child would take after his jet black hair or her platinum white hair. The gender didn’t matter as long as the child inherits her beautiful pale green eyes. When he first saw them, he was so mesmerized that he wasn’t able to look away.

The rest of the day went by a lot slower than he had expected. Probably because he was expecting it to go a little faster so he could return to her warm bed. Even though it was spring, there was still a chill in the air. A warm bed was very tempting, especially when there was a beautiful woman lying in it.