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Authors: Cecelia Ahern

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BOOK: P.S. I Love You
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“Operation Gold Curtain,” Denise exclaimed excitedly, trying to drag them to their feet. “It’s time to infiltrate the VIP bar!”

“You mean this isn’t it?” Sharon said sarcastically, looking around the club.

“No! That’s where the real celebs go!” Denise said excitedly, pointing at the gold curtain, which was blocked by possibly the biggest and tallest man on the planet.

“I don’t really care where the celebs are, to be honest, Denise,” piped up Holly. “I’m fine here where I am,” and she snuggled into the cozy couch.

Denise groaned and rolled her eyes. “Girls! Abbey and Ciara are in there, why aren’t we?”

Jack looked curiously across at his girlfriend. Abbey shrugged her shoulders weakly and held her face in her hand. None of this was jogging anybody’s memory except of course Denise’s, and she had fled the room. Jack’s smile suddenly faded and he slid down in his chair and crossed his arms. It was obviously all right for his sister to act the fool but his girlfriend was a different matter. Jack placed his feet up on the chair in front of him and quieted down for the rest of the documentary.

Once Sharon and Holly had heard that Abbey and Ciara were in the room, they sat up attentively and listened to Denise’s plan. “OK, girlies, here’s what we’re gonna do!”

Holly turned away from the screen and nudged Sharon. Holly couldn’t remember doing or saying any of these things at all; she was beginning to think Declan had hired look-alike actors as a horrible practical joke. Sharon turned to face her with wide worried eyes and shrugged. Nope, she wasn’t there that night either. The camera followed the three girls as they very suspiciously approached the gold curtain and loitered around like idiots. Sharon finally built up the courage to tap the giant on the shoulder, causing him to turn around and provide Denise with enough time to escape under the curtain. She got down on her hands and knees and stuck her head through to the VIP bar while her bum and legs stuck out from the other side of the curtain.

Holly kicked her in the bum to hurry her along.

“I can see them!” Denise hissed loudly. “Oh my God! They’re speaking to that Hollywood actor guy!” She took her head back out from under the curtain and looked at Holly with excitement. Unfortunately, Sharon was running out of things to say to the giant bouncer and he turned his head just in time to catch Denise.

“No no no no no!” Denise said calmly again. “You don’t understand! This is Princess Holly of Sweden!”

“Finland,” Sharon corrected her.

“Sorry, Finland,” Denise said, remaining on her knees. “I am bowing to her. Join me!”

Sharon quickly got on her knees and the two of them began to worship Holly’s feet. Holly looked around awkwardly as everyone in the club began to stare, and she once again gave them the royal wave. Nobody seemed very impressed.

“Oh Holly!” her mother said, trying to catch her breath after laughing so hard.

The big burly bouncer turned his back and spoke into his walkie-talkie. “Boys, got a situation with the princess and the lady.”

Denise looked at both the girls in panic and mouthed, “Hide!” The girls jumped to their feet and fled. The camera searched through the crowds for the girls but couldn’t find them.

From her seat in Club Diva, Holly groaned loudly and held her head in her hands as it finally clicked with her what was about to happen.

 

NINETEEN

 

 

P
AUL AND MUSTACHE MAN RUSHED upstairs to the club and met up at the gold curtain with the very big man. “What’s going on?” Mustache Man asked him.

“Those girls you told me to keep my eye on tried to crawl through to the other side,” the big man said seriously. You could tell by looking at him that his previous job involved killing people if they tried to crawl over to the other side. He was taking this breach of security very seriously.

“Where are they?” Mustache Man asked.

The big man cleared his throat and looked away. “They’re hiding, boss.”

Mustache Man rolled his eyes. “They’re hiding?”

“Yes, boss.”

“Where? In the club?”

“I think so, boss.”

“You think so?”

“Well, they didn’t pass us on our way in, so they must still be here,” Paul piped up.

“OK,” Mustache Man sighed. “Well, let’s start looking then, get someone to keep an eye on the curtain.”

The camera secretly followed the three bouncers as they patrolled the club looking behind couches, under tables, behind curtains; they even got someone to check the toilets. Holly’s family laughed hysterically at the scene unfolding before their eyes.

There was a bit of commotion at the top of the club and the bouncers headed toward the noise to sort it out. A crowd was beginning to gather around and the two skinny dancers dressed in gold body paint had stopped dancing and were staring with horrified expressions at the bed. The camera panned across to the king-size bed that was tilted for display. Underneath the gold silk sheets there appeared to be three pigs fighting under a blanket. Sharon, Denise and Holly rolled around screaming at one another, trying to make themselves as flat as possible so they wouldn’t be noticed. The crowd thickened, and soon enough the music was shut down. The three big lumps under the bed stopped squirming and suddenly froze, not knowing what was going on outside.

The bouncers counted to three and pulled the covers off the bed. Three very startled-looking girls appearing like deer caught in headlights stared back at them and lay there as flat as they could on their backs with their arms stiffly by their sides.


One
just had to get forty winks before
one
left,” Holly said with her royal accent and the other girls burst out laughing.

“Come on, Princess, the fun’s over,” said Paul. The three men accompanied the girls outside, assuring them that they would never again be allowed back into the club.

“Can I just tell my friends that we’re gone?” Sharon asked.

The men tutted and looked away.

“Excuse me? Am I talking to myself? I asked you if it was OK if I go in and tell my friends that we had to leave?”

“Look, stop playing around, girls,” Mustache Man said angrily. “Your friends aren’t in there. Now off you go, back to your beds.”

“Excuse me,” Sharon said angrily, “I have two friends in the VIP bar; one of them has pink hair and the other one…”

“Girls!” he raised his voice. “She does not want anyone bothering her. She is no more your friend than the man on the moon. Now clear off before you get yourselves into more trouble.”

Everyone in the club howled with laughter.

The scene changed to ‘The Long Journey Home&rsquo, and all the girls were in the taxi. Abbey sat like a dog with her head hanging out of the open window by order of the taxi driver. “You’re not throwing up in my cab. You either stick your head out the window or you walk home.” Abbey’s face was almost purple and her teeth were chattering, but she wasn’t going to walk all the way home. Ciara sat with her arms crossed and with a huff on her face, angry with the girls for forcing her to leave the club so early but more embarrassingly for blowing her cover as a famous rock singer. Sharon and Denise had fallen asleep with their heads resting on each other.

The camera turned around to focus on Holly, who was sitting in the passenger seat once again. But this time she wasn’t talking the ear off the taxi driver; she rested her head on the back of the seat and stared straight ahead out into the dark night. Holly knew what she was thinking as she watched herself. Time to go home to that big empty house alone again.

“Happy Birthday, Holly,” Abbey’s tiny little voice trembled.

Holly turned around to smile at her and came face-to-face with the camera. “Are you
still
filming with that thing? Turn it off!” and she knocked the camera out of Declan’s hand. The end.

As Daniel went to turn the lights up in the club, Holly slipped quickly away from the gang and escaped through the nearest door. She needed to collect her thoughts before everyone started talking about it. She found herself in a tiny storeroom surrounded by mops and buckets and empty kegs. What a stupid place to hide, she thought. She sat down on a keg and thought about what she had just seen. She was in shock. She felt confused and angry at Declan; he had told her that he was making a documentary about club life. She distinctly remembered him not mentioning anything about making a show of her and her friends. And he had literally made a show of them. If he had asked her politely if he could do it, that would be a different matter. Although she still wouldn’t have agreed to do it.

But the last thing she wanted to do right now was to scream at Declan in front of everyone. Apart from the fact that the documentary had completely humiliated her, Declan had actually filmed it and edited it very well. If it had been anyone else but her on the TV, Holly would have thought it very deserving of the award. But it
was
her, so therefore it
didn’t
deserve to win…Parts of it had been funny, she agreed, and she didn’t mind so much the bits of her and her friends being so silly, it was more the sneaky shots of her unhappiness that bothered her.

Thick salty tears trickled down her face and she wrapped her arms around her body to comfort herself. She had seen on television how she truly felt. Lost and alone. She cried for Gerry, she cried for herself with big, thick, heaving sobs that hurt her ribs whenever she tried to catch her breath. She didn’t want to be alone anymore, and she didn’t want her family seeing the loneliness she tried so hard to hide from them. She just wanted Gerry back and didn’t care about anything else. She didn’t care if he came back and they fought every day, she didn’t care if they were broke and had no house and no money. She just wanted him. She heard the door open behind her and felt big strong arms wrapping themselves around her frail body. She cried as though months of built-up anguish were all tumbling out at once.

“What’s wrong with her? Didn’t she like it?” she heard Declan ask worriedly.

“Just leave her be, son,” her mum said softly, and the door was closed behind them again as Daniel stroked her hair and rocked her softly.

Finally after crying what felt like all the tears in the world, Holly stopped and let go of Daniel. “Sorry,” she sniffed, drying her face with the sleeves of her top.

“There’s no need to be sorry,” he said, gently removing her hand from her face and handing her a tissue.

She sat in silence while trying to compose herself.

“If you’re upset about the documentary, then there’s no need,” he said, sitting down on a crate of glasses opposite her.

“Yeah right,” she said sarcastically, wiping her tears again.

“No really,” he said honestly, “I thought it was really funny. You all looked like you were having a great time.” He smiled at her.

“Pity that’s not how I felt,” she said sadly.

“Maybe that’s not how you felt, but the camera doesn’t pick up on feelings, Holly.”

“You don’t have to try to make me feel better.” Holly was embarrassed at being consoled by a stranger.

“I’m not
trying
to make you feel better, I’m just saying it like it is. Nobody but you noticed whatever it is that’s upsetting you. I didn’t see anything, so why should anyone else?”

Holly felt mildly better. “Are you sure?”

“I’m sure I’m sure,” he said, smiling. “Now you really have to stop hiding in all the rooms in my club, I might take it personally,” he laughed.

“Are the girls OK?” Holly asked, hoping it was just her being stupid after all. There was loud laughter from outside.

“They’re fine, as you can hear,” he said, nodding toward the door. “Ciara’s delighted everyone will think she’s a star, Denise has finally come out of the toilet and Sharon just can’t stop laughing. Although Jack’s giving Abbey a hard time about throwing up on the way home.”

Holly giggled.

“So you see, nobody even noticed what you saw.”

“Thanks, Daniel.” She took a deep breath and smiled at him.

“You ready to go face your public?” he asked.

“Think so.” Holly stepped outside to the sounds of laughter. The lights were up and everyone was sitting around the table and happily sharing jokes and stories. Holly joined the table and sat beside her mum. Elizabeth wrapped her arm around her daughter and gave her a kiss on the cheek.

“Well, I thought it was great,” announced Jack enthusiastically. “If only we could get Declan to go out with the girls all the time, then we’d know what they get up to, eh John?” He winked over at Sharon’s husband.

“Well, I can assure you,” Abbey spoke up, “that what you saw is not a regular girls’ night out.”

The boys weren’t having any of it.

“So is it OK?” Declan asked Holly, afraid he had upset his sister.

Holly threw him a look.

“I thought you would like it, Hol,” he said worriedly.

“I might have liked it if I had
known
what you were doing,” she snapped back.

“But I wanted it to be a surprise,” he said genuinely.

“I hate surprises,” she said, rubbing her stinging eyes.

“Let that be a lesson to you, son,” Frank warned his son. “You shouldn’t go around filming people without them knowing what you’re doing. It’s illegal.”

“I bet they didn’t know that when they chose him for the award,” Elizabeth agreed.

“You’re not gonna tell them, are you, Holly?” Declan asked worriedly.

“Not if you’re nice to me for the next few months,” Holly said, slyly twisting her hair around her finger. Declan made a face; he was stuck and he knew it. “Yeah whatever,” he said, waving her away.

“To tell you the truth, Holly, I have to admit I thought it was quite funny,” giggled Sharon. “You and your Operation Gold Curtain,” she thumped Denise playfully on the leg.

Denise rolled her eyes. “Oh, I can tell you all something — I am
never
drinking again.”

Everyone laughed and Tom wrapped his arm around her shoulders.

“What?” she said innocently. “I really mean it.”

“Speaking of drink, would anyone like one?” Daniel stood up from his chair. “Jack?”

BOOK: P.S. I Love You
2.73Mb size Format: txt, pdf, ePub
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