Pull (Deep Darkness Book 1) (21 page)

Another user approached me. It was a young woman around the same
age as me. She called herself Hera. She had one cybernetic eye. Apparently
one time after using the nexus she felt so messed up and withdrawn from the
world she took a knife and jabbed it inside her eye socket. Balkava was the
one to actually save her and stop her from plunging it even further inside
killing herself. She told me that after that they gave her a few weeks off from
using. It wasn’t enough. Hera took me back to her quarters and showed me
her lower body full of scars and cuts. The only way she could escape the
nightmares inflicted on her from the visions and things she saw were through
pain. Whatever I did I had saved her from that now. No more nexus meant
she no longer felt she had to hurt herself.

Hera wasn’t the only user that came up to me after that. For the
first
time the users on Erebus were no longer retreating to their quarters for
silence and solitude. They were no longer splicing on whatever the medics
would let them get their hands on. I can’t imagine what it is that most people
saw. I had never had too much trouble differentiating between what was real
and what was in there. I thought other users would be just like me but they
weren’t. They were all constantly in pain and now they were free. No longer
would they live in fear of what the past or future might bring. The only
problem was I wasn’t. I wanted more.

After a day of bed rest and a few medical tests I was sent back to First
Descent. The Erebus had slowed to a crawl. It would be a week maybe two
before we arrived at the orbital the populace dubbed Eden-3. Named after
the Garden of Eden the origin of mankind. It was poetic. This planet would
be were we started over. It was also ironic that during the dark times when
the Erebus, Aelita, and Tritan had first taken to the stars humans quickly
grew weary of living in the cold dullness of space. It was only a few years
before they tried to settle a colony. Up until that point no one was really
adjusted to living in space. A skeleton crew ran the trinity and most humans
slept waking up every few years to find nothing had changed. It was on a
planet three times the size of Earth. It would have been beautiful. That was
where we had one of our first real incursions with the Skrav. Some called it
the third invasion while others viewed it as the day we came to our senses and
really began to run. The people on the planet were massacred but all three
human ships pulled together and defeated the small Skrav fleet and glassed
what was left on the planet below. Eden-1 had become uninhabitable.

A few hundred years later humans got involved in a war with another
alien race called the Ankari. The Ankari were a bloodthirsty savage race of
humanoid creatures twelve feet tall and covered in pink abrasions, Many
Ankari grafted various bio-organics and cybernetics too their bones. From
birth they severed the part of their brains that felt pain and pleasure. They
were a devoted species I have to give them that. Anyone that wasn’t an
Ankari was considered a sacrifice to whatever God or Gods they worshipped.
It was their reason for taking to the stars. Apparently the Eek or Pok had
made first contact with them a long time ago before they became an
intergalactic threat. Their kindness made them victims. The Ankari were
smart enough to learn to fly their starships and eventually they were smart
enough to build their own. When we first encountered them we set up shop
on a planet we called Bedlam, a planet we planned to stay at once we won
against them. In the end the planet itself was used as a weapon to destroy the
Ankari. I’m not sure how they did it I just know that was what our legends
say happen. The Ankari were the first alien species the humans ever
deliberately wiped out (aside from the creatures we hunted and forced into
extinction on Earth). If there are any left no one has seen them since. We
learn this so that we may reflect. We are not a superior species or a war
driven one. We fight to survive and we always beat the odds. The human race
may be a parasite but we are a resilient one that deserves respect.

Scans showed the orbital could support human life. It was massive just as big
if not bigger then a planet. We could see it from millions of miles out. Its
strange shape made it stand out in the sky. It floated like an abstract work of
art.

I was running a drill with First Descent when I had my
first blackout.
The day before I had woken several times in a cold sweat. I had no idea what
was happening at first. It was so sudden. One moment I was running and
ducking behind the New Dawn using an air rifle to shoot cans off a ledge and
the next I was blinded by a white light then darkness. When the darkness
cleared I was on a boat. I recognized it. It was the Devil’s Saber. The same
ship Joeseph had been on. I was in the body of a pirate staring out at the
open sea. This was different from my past visions. The nexus always felt
empty. This felt ethereal. I felt free. I still wasn’t in control of my own body
but I felt more like I was alive like I was living in that moment. Less forced. I
could smell the ocean even taste the salt on my tongue. As quickly as it came
it was over. When I came too only a minute or two had passed. Trevor and
Brecca were already running over to my side , in Brecca's hands I could see a
medical kit. They were trying to figure out what was wrong with me. I felt
faint for a moment, the world was spinning it was like I was on a roller
coaster ride or spinning about inside an assault ship. I felt like I was flying.
The world melted into place. Everything felt amazing and new. No longer
had I felt like a prisoner. My hunger had been fulfilled.

Hayden gave me a full check up. Nothing was wrong with me. For all
they knew it was a psychological effect from using the nexus so much and
that it was quite possible I may be lossing my mind. Nothing out of the
ordinary considering how many have lost their minds before and found they
were floating through life like they are somewhere else. I thought about Hera.
I wonder how she would live her life now. It almost seemed like they were the
lucky ones. If I could feel what I felt and see a beautiful clean Earth 24/7 I
would always choose that over this.

The second time I blacked out I was in my own bed. It was late at night. I
was in my bunk plugged into wire watching the latest feeds from Hayden and
Brecca and archive films found packed away inside the Erebus database. This
vision was new. It was far more ancient then the pirate. I was a slave in the
middle of a desert. All around me I was surrounded by Egyptian monuments.
I was handed a black sword that seemed like it was made of emerald. The
sword was a khopesh known as the sword of victory. I couldn’t understand
the language but I think I was being granted my freedom. The man that
handed me the sword had been a pharaoh. He was covered in jewels and as
strange as it was his skull was elongated in the back. Somehow I knew we
had just fought some kind of battle together. Then that was it.

I couldn’t sleep that night. I woke puking my guts out across the
floor. I ran
through the archives trying to learn everything I could about ancient Egypt.
Looking through hieroglyphs only one thing became clear. The sun
represented inside many of their stories seemed to parallel the black stone
that was the nexus. The rays that shined off were visions. Maybe I was
reaching but was it possible the nexus could be that old and ancient? Nothing
I could open or find gave any kind of origin to the nexus. The only thing I
could dig up was a file I couldn’t access. I had to pull some strings. If anyone
could get into it without drawing attention to him or herself it would be
Hayden. Among his many talents he was a genius when it came to cracking
codes and breaking into systems. There was another reason to go to Hayden.
If there was anyone on Erebus that I trusted it was my childhood friend.

Hayden took no time coming to my room. He was with Brecca. She didn’t
mind he was going out and had told her truth. His friend needed him. She
didn’t ask why or say anything about it being so late. On the Erebus time was
mostly irrelevant. There were no designated schedules so long as you did
your part and pulled your weight. As long as we showed up to our shift on
time we were fine no questions asked. I told him about my new visions and
watched as he pulled up a holo display. Through web after web of security he
moved his fingers like a musician playing an instrument. He was a man of
many talents. In a little under three hours he managed to pull the file up.
“You know it might have been easier for you to just ask Balkava, you have
every right to know what’s in here.” “That would have been too easy. We’re
not exactly on the best of terms lately anyway.” He was right though. The
information in that file should have been viewable by anyone on this ship
especially a user like me. If they were hiding this what else might they be
hiding?

The hologram expanded over the entire wall in my room. Light illuminated
my bed and guitar making everything glow with a blue hue. Mathematical
formulas appeared over and over but nothing seemed to make sense. The only
thing that was discernable from the text was two locations, Area 51 and
Montauk. I was putting the pieces together in my head. The nexus was
ancient far more ancient then any other relic dug up by the human race
except for maybe the Lethe ruins. This only raised more questions. I knew at
some point so long as my new visions were real and I wasn’t losing my mind
that the Egyptians had it. From there it could have been buried in a tomb
unearthed probably by grave robbers and sold on the black market -Vikings,
Templars, pirates, Black Sun and then into the hands of Joseph Everett.
From there it could have fallen into the hands of the military. Area 51.
Montauk. Narville. There was still something missing. Where was it from?
Maybe the Skrav were the only ones with the answers. They were the only
ones that had a weapon able to cut it. “I wonder what happened to the piece
from the Tritan? Do you think it shattered and broke or is it still there in the
ruins of Errikus?” I was thinking aloud. Hayden didn’t know what to say. He
speculated it would probably be buried so deep it would never be discovered.
Eventually the continents on Errikus would bury it before anyone was able to
rediscover it again. Then the question crossed my mind. If our nexus broke
did it have any effect on the one onboard the Aelita? Unfortunately that was
a question only Balkava could answer.

Hayden and I continued to speculate theory after theory each more insane
then the other. Perhaps the nexus was left over from the creation of the
universe; a small fragment of the big bang or a previous big collapse.
Throughout history there have been prophets, oracles, seers were they all
connected to the nexus somehow. Where they users just like me?

The ethereal high took me again. I was mid sentence with Hayden when I
saw the flash of white light. I felt my consciousness withdraw from my body
as if I was being swept away by a river. I was Aelia. I recognized the body I
was in. It felt so familiar. She was inside her bedroom. Abstract art hung on
the walls it was hard to see not just because the room was dim but her vision
was fading. It felt as if she was so old now. I could see the wrinkles on her
hand. Had she lived the rest of her life full of hate and regret? I wanted to let
her know it would all be ok. I wanted to tell her that everything wasn’t for
nothing. Slowly her voice began to speak.

“Bloody sky in the morning. The angels of death depart. Man your battle
stations. The end is coming to tear us apart.” She paused. She looked around
the room as if someone was there listening to her but there was no one
around. “Don’t let them win. I know you can hear me.... Sev.... Run” The
vision went black. I wasn’t sure if she had closed her eyes or died. I wasn’t
sure what was happening. How did she know I was watching? Did she know
I was watching? Was this just some speech she practiced night after night?
Did she always just assume someone was watching? She signaled me out.
ME. How was this possible? The vision stopped. When I felt my body
become my own I let out a scream that echoed throughout the room. My
body began to shake and seizure. Hayden did his best to calm me down
grabbing a syringe full of God knows what from a med kit. A few minutes
passed and my body lay still. Drool dripped from my mouth. I wanted more.

I didn’t say a word. Instead I starred into oblivion. Hayden waved his hand in
front of my face but this wasn’t where I wanted to be. I want to believe what
happened next was my own will. My life faded white again and I was back in
the body of Joseph Everett holding a M16 crouched behind a trench of
barbwire.

For some reason I felt as if I knew exactly where I was. It was the Battle of
Burma. The year was 1946. World War 2 had officially ended but not
everyone was ready to give up the fight. Then I heard him say my name,
“Sev.” It was as if he was surprised as if I had startled him somehow. I felt for
a moment like he knew me, everything about me like we had become one
soul. Not possible. This wasn’t how the nexus worked.

I woke up in the in
firmary. A needle stuck in my arm. Hayden said I was out
for seven hours and during that time I suffered several seizures. Hera and
several others had come to visit me while I was out. There was a small stuffed
toy sitting near my bed. Hayden made a remark saying how it looked like
someone likes me and then hypothesized that I had “overdosed” and started
suffering sever trauma. I had gone into analeptic shock. He pulled up a
hologram showing small shards of the nexus had entered my blood stream.
This was the cause of my new visions. He worked up a suppressant that
would hold back most but not all of them. It would create a protein chain
around the microscopic shards so they wouldn’t interact with me. I didn’t
want it to stop. I begged. He had already given me the suppressant. I had no
choice if he didn’t then I would have kept having vision after vision until I
died of starvation or suicide.