Punching and Kissing (29 page)

Both of us wore what we normally wore to the gym—tank tops and sweatpants. We could have been about to train, if it wasn’t for the lack of gloves.

We moved slowly through the crowd, but it was no good trying to be inconspicuous. As soon as one person saw us, a cry went up, radiating through the people like a wave. Some cheered. Some leered at me. Some started discussing—loudly—which of us would win.

I noticed that no money was changing hands. Everyone knew this wasn’t going to be a traditional fight, where the best fighter won. They weren’t interested in betting. They just wanted to see us agonize and sob and brutalize one another.

Several men leaned in front of us and tried to grope me. Whichever way I dodged, there was another hand there to brush a thigh or grab for a breast. Aedan tried to keep me away from the worst of it, but he couldn’t be everywhere at once. When one of the men grabbed my ass, he lost it and swung at the guy. The man staggered back, clutching a bloody nose.

“You’re still protecting her?” said Rick’s voice. “That’s kind of ironic, given the circumstances.”

He’d pushed his way through the crowd from the other direction and now stood in the middle of the ring, waiting for us. I heard Aedan give a low growl and made sure I had a firm grip on his hand, ready to hold him back if need be. Carl, Rick’s other bodyguard, was standing just behind him, gun drawn—there was no need to conceal them, in here. If Aedan attacked, it would all be over in an instant. And I knew the same gun would be used to slay us if we refused to fight or tried to run.

“Have the two of you worked it out between you?” asked Rick. “Who’s going to make the sacrifice? I’m genuinely curious to know.”

I’ve never wanted to kill anyone so much in my entire life. Both of us just stood and stared at him, holding hands for strength.

Rick stepped closer to me. “And just think—all this could have been avoided.” He reached out and brushed my cheek with his thumb, which made my skin crawl. “All you had to do was
not
tell your boyfriend what happened with Lowell. Then tonight would have been a few minutes of unpleasantness on your back—or maybe on your face—and you both could have gone on with your lives. Although…”—he glanced at Aedan—”he probably wouldn’t have wanted you, afterward.”

I gripped Aedan’s hand even harder, but it was to hold myself back as much as him. I knew Rick was trying to provoke me, to show off to the crowd, and I wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction.

Rick rolled his eyes and turned his back on us, quite unafraid. Carl and his gun gave him all the bravery he needed.
“TONIGHT!”
he bellowed, holding his cane aloft for silence, “Two star-crossed lovers face the ultimate decision. How much will they sacrifice for each other?”

The crowd roared. I saw Al close the side door, sealing us all in the barn. He strolled over to Rick, his gun drawn, and took up a position beside him, ready to shoot if we disobeyed.

Aedan pulled me close. Both of us were breathing hard, now, trying not to panic. “You know what you have to do,” he told me. “It’s the only way. You have to do it.”

I shook my head. “I can’t!” I knew it was going to be me who lost the fight, but I had to convince him I was going along with his plan.

He knitted his fingers with mine, raising his voice over the crowd. “You can. You can do this. This is the only way we win.” And, before I could argue, he leaned in and kissed me, one last time. His lips came down on mine and it was as if he was trying to inject every ounce of his soul into mine, so that he could live on in me.

Aedan

I was ready to die.

I’d made my peace with it, during the walk back to my apartment after seeing Rick, and during the day training Sylvie. I was surprised by how easily I accepted it. In some ways, I guess I’d accepted I might die the very first time I went to fight at The Pit. And God knows the world wouldn’t be losing much. I was a pretty good fighter and a pretty average dock worker. The universe would do just fine without me.

What ate at me was the effect it would have on Sylvie. Would she ever forgive herself? I had to make it as quick as possible—in the first round, if possible. I couldn’t show pain. If she saw she was hurting me, she’d stop. I had to act like I was fine until I went down and then—

And then what? Would she really keep beating on me, until I was dead? On her own, no. But when she stopped, I knew Rick would be there to scream at her, to tell her she had no choice. He’d threaten Alec. I had to pray that that would be enough for her to finish the job.

Rick had swapped the air horn they used at The Pit for an old brass bell. It sounded to start the fight, the peals echoing off the metal walls, but I didn’t want to stop kissing Sylvie. Her lips felt so good against mine. I knew it was the last time I’d ever feel them.

I broke the kiss, took a long, shuddering breath and stepped back, opening my eyes. I lifted my hands and we tapped our fists together for luck. I could see the tears welling up in her eyes and felt the heat of all the anger and pain building up behind my own.

And the fight began.

Sylvie

We stood there staring at each other, fists raised but neither of us moving to hit the other one. Aedan nodded at me.
He wants me to hit him. He wants me to hit him while he just stands there!

“Fight me!” I yelled over the crowd. “I can’t do it if you don’t fight me!”

He just stood there, solid as a rock, only his eyes betraying his emotions. I could see every muscle in his arms standing out, every vein.

“
Hit me!”
I screamed.

Rick re-entered the ring, a gun in his hand, and tapped his cane meaningfully on the floor. If one of us didn’t make a move, he was going to kill us both.

Letting out a low moan, I stepped forward and swung at the man I loved.

Standing perfectly still while someone hits you is one of the hardest things in the world. Aedan didn’t even flinch. My fist glanced off his jaw, a clumsy hit but enough to snap his head to the side. My guts knotted up.
Jesus, what am I doing?

Aedan nodded at me to do it again.

I couldn’t hear anything and I realized the crowd were roaring, the shouts and cheers and leering comments about my body all blending into one noise. Rick was still standing beside us, gun raised.

“I love you,” mouthed Aedan. “Hit me.”

I hit him, this time putting my full force behind it. I just wanted to get Rick to back off. Normally, my fist wouldn’t have even got close to him or, if it did, it would have been like hitting a brick wall. But Aedan hadn’t tensed up. He’d left that ripped stomach relaxed and my punch seemed to go right to the very center of him, doubling him over. The crowd roared so loud that my ears hurt.

Aedan struggled for breath. I’d been winded a few times in training, though never that severely, so I knew the bursting, aching pain and the desperate fight for air. It tore my heart apart to see him like that and my mind screamed at me to do something, to stop the monster who was hurting my man.

But I couldn’t. The monster was me.

And now I saw Rick turn towards Aedan. His message was clear: he wanted this to be a real fight.

He wanted Aedan to hit me.

Aedan

I straightened up, groaning at the pain in my stomach. And saw Sylvie begin to circle me, dodging and weaving. At first, I was relieved. She’d started to fight. Hopefully now she could get some good hits in and—

I realized she wasn’t punching. She was just dancing around me, making it look good.

Giving me a target.

She wasn’t doing it for her own benefit; she was doing it for mine. I saw Rick looming nearby, gun drawn, and got the message: I had to hit her, and she was trying to lure me into it.

I lifted my fists...but I couldn’t. Sparring had been hard enough but actually hitting her, bare knuckle? I’d never raised my hands to a woman in my life.

“You have to,” mouthed Sylvie over the crowd. I could see tears in her eyes.

Behind her, Rick raised the gun. I knew he wouldn’t hesitate to shoot both of us, if we didn’t give him what he wanted.

I drew back one fist—and saw Sylvie flinch and brace herself.
Oh, Jesus, no!
I couldn’t do it if she did that! Christ, she was terrified.
What am I doing?
Even death would be better than this.

My
death. But not if Rick killed Sylvie too.

To save her, I had to hurt her.

I did it fast, before she had too much time to be scared. I swung fast and got her right in the mouth. Her head whipped to the side and she cried out...and the crowd roared even louder.
Jesus, the sick bastards!

When she looked at me again, her lip was split open and blood was dripping onto her tank top. I’d picked the place where it would look the worst, to appease Rick, but where there’d hopefully be no lasting damage. So I was ready for the blood. What I wasn’t ready for was the look on her face—the momentary shock and then the deep betrayal. The look that no man should ever, ever see.

I looked at her in horror. Then I lunged at her and pulled her into a clinch, gasping in her ear so that she’d hear me over the crowd. “
I’m sorry!”

And then the bell went for the end of the round and Rick’s goons were dragging us apart.

Sylvie

I sat down on my hay bale. My mouth was filling up with coppery, salty blood and I knew that I’d vomit if I swallowed it, so I spat it out.