Purity (Pure and Tainted) (23 page)

Boone was left standing in the corridor alone looking down at the
small pink tube. “Great,” he muttered to himself.
“Just
great.
How in the hell am I gonna tell her—”

“Tell me what?”

He whirled around to see K standing there, his shirt closed around
her, but held carefully away from the sensitive points of her nipples. “I
wasn’t sure where you’d gone,” she said.

“I told you, I went to get some answers.”

“And did you?” She raised an eyebrow at him. “Get some?”

Boone sighed. “None you’re going to like, I’m afraid. Come one,
let’s go back to my quarters and I’ll try to explain.”

Chapter Sixteen

“So now I have
another
cycle
I have to go through?” K stared at him in disbelief. “How long does this one
last?”

“I don’t know.” Boone shook his head, looking miserable. “But I’m
afraid your first sex cycle is a little more serious than just getting your
period for the first time.”

“How serious?”
K felt cold all over. “What’s
going to happen to me?” she demanded.

Boone ran a hand through his hair. “According to Loki, you’ll be
compelled to mate.”

“Mate?
You mean engage in sexual
reproduction?” K began to pace around the room. “I can’t, Boone. I don’t want
to!”

“I’m afraid you’re not going to have a choice. With the Erian sex
cycle, it’s have sex or die.” He looked wretchedly unhappy but K was so upset
herself she could barely spare a thought for his emotions.

“I thought you said it was called ‘making love’ when it’s with
someone you care for. Boone…” It was on the tip of her tongue to ask if he
cared for her, if he would help her through this terrible thing but her pride
rose up and choked her, not letting the words come out.

Boone seemed to understand anyway. “It is,” he said softly. “But
Loki says you’ll be drawn to another Erian.”

“I’ll be drawn to a stranger? Some filthy, contaminated male I
don’t even
know?”
K wrapped her arms
across her chest and hugged herself tightly, ignoring the jagged bolts of pain
in her tender breasts.

“K, honey…”

“I want my suit.” She pointed a shaking finger at him. “I want it
now,
Boone. I won’t stand for this. I
won’t be reduced to contaminating myself with some strange Erian.”

Boone sighed. “It’s not fully regenerated yet. And even if it was,
I don’t know how safe it is for you to put it on in the middle of your first
cycle.”

“I don’t care about that. Just get it—get it now!” K heard the note
of rising hysteria in her own voice and took a deep breath, fighting the
turbulent emotions that threatened to overcome her. “Please,” she whispered, in
a voice that
trembled
only a little. “Please, Boone.”

Finally, he nodded. “All right, darlin’. I’ll get it.”

K paced restlessly while he was gone, wondering what in Purity she
was supposed to do. She could feel the hollowness inside her growing and the
pain in her most sensitive areas burned like fire. These were signs, Boone had
told her—symptoms of her eventual fate.
But
I can’t do that,
she told herself, still pacing.
Can’t let some strange male put himself
inside me.
Maybe if it was
Boone but anyone else…

The idea of anyone else touching
her so intimately, invading her, contaminating her to the very core, made K feel
sick and weak.
It was as though someone had told her she must lie naked in a tub full of
leb’gra bugs and let their thousands of tiny, scratchy, chitinous legs touch
her as they moved over and under and around her body with no protection between
herself and them.

The analogy made her skin crawl and she shivered in disgust. But
even the leb’gra bugs would be better than sexual reproduction with a stranger.
And yet Boone said she would have no choice…

“Here it is.” Mercifully, his deep voice cut through the repeating
cycle of worry and doubt her mind had fallen into.

“Give it to me!” K ran quickly to take it from him. But when he
held it out to her, she found herself strangely reluctant to touch it.

“Here.” It hung limply from his fingers like something shed by a
reptile.
Something strange and scaly and altogether inhuman.

“Thank you.” K made herself take it from him, despite her sudden
revulsion. It felt slippery in her hands—almost alive.
Which
made sense, since it
was
a semi-sentient
being.
K knew she should have felt like she was greeting an old
friend—the skinsuit had been part of her since she was nine cycles old. But
somehow she didn’t feel that way at all.

“See, it’s still not healed from where I cut it.” Boone pointed to
a long, jagged tear in the fabric which started in the thigh and ended high in
the abdomen. “It looks a lot better than it did,” he continued. “Maybe it will
be healed soon.”

“I hope so.” K clutched the suit to her, ignoring the strange
reluctance she felt to have it close to her. “Thank you, Boone.” She looked up
at him. “I’ll help you get your sister from the pshalite mines, I swear it. And
I won’t kill you until after I do.”

“Thank you, K.” He nodded gravely. “But I still think it’s too
damaged to wear.”

“It will be whole soon.” K took a deep breath. “In the mean time,
I will simply have to live with the pain.”

“There is a way to back down the sexual cravings,” Boone said
hesitantly. “I don’t know how you’d feel about it though.”

“Tell me.” K looked at him eagerly. “Anything—I’ll do anything I
have to.”

“You may not be so eager once I tell you.” Boone shook his head
but motioned to the sleeping platform. “C’mon over here and let me explain it.”

* * * * *

“So I’m supposed to touch myself between my legs until I feel pleasure?”
K sounded deeply skeptical and Boone couldn’t say that he blamed her. But
still, if this was the only way to keep her cravings in check, he didn’t know
what else she could do.

“That’s right.” He cleared his throat, feeling uncomfortably like
a pervert.
“Until you feel a release.”

“A release?
What
kind
of release?” K shook her head. “I don’t understand how this is
supposed to help, Boone.”

“It backs off the sexual cravings—at least for a little while.
Look, K, it’s really not hard to do. Aside from you Purists, everybody all over
the solar system does it all the time.”

“It sounds like a waste of time to me.” K frowned. “But if you
think it will help.”

“I do.” Boone started to get up but she stopped him with a touch
on his arm.

“Where are you going?”

Boone gritted his teeth.
“To give you some
privacy.
This isn’t something you usually do with an audience, darlin’.”

“But I’ve never done it before,” she protested. “What if I can’t
get it right?” A look of fear passed over her delicate features. “Please…” It
was clear she didn’t want to beg but she couldn’t quite keep the pleading note
out of her voice. “Please, Boone, don’t leave me.”

Give me strength!
Like it wasn’t hard enough to be
around her while she was half naked, now he had to watch her put on a one woman
show. How the hell was he going to get through this while keeping his hands to
himself? But the pleading note in her voice and the fear in her black eyes kept
him from leaving.

“All right.”
Sighing, he sank back down on the sleeping
platform beside her. “I’ll stay. I just hope you won’t be upset with me for
watching you do this later, when you know a little more.”

“I won’t be,” K promised, unbuttoning her shirt. To Boone’s
relief, she didn’t take it off completely. Instead she spread it open, baring her
breasts and the ripe little mound of her pussy. “I’m supposed to put this
ointment on first, is that right?” she murmured, examining the small pink tube
of gel Loki had given Boone.

“Yes, that’s right.” Boone’s own voice sounded slightly strangled in
his ears.

K gave him a frown as she squirted a little of the gel on one
fingertip. “Are you all right?”

“Fine.
Just fine.”
Except for the part where he had to watch her innocent self-exploration while
keeping his libido in check. “I’m fine,” he repeated firmly, wondering who he
was trying to convince— himself or her.

“All right then.” Tentatively, she brushed her gel-covered finger
over one tight nipple. “Ouch!” She jerked her hand away, frowning.

“What is it? Are you okay?” Boone asked worriedly. What if she was
so far gone that even the gel and an orgasm couldn’t help her?

“It’s so
cold
.” K shivered
and wiped the gel away carefully with the hem of her shirt. “I don’t see how
this is supposed to be soothing.”

“I don’t know either but you’d better keep trying,” Boone told
her.

She tried again with the other nipple with the same result. “I
don’t like this.” She frowned, looking frustrated. “I’m no good at it.”

“It’s like everything else—it takes practice.” Boone tried to be
encouraging although the sight of her stroking gel over her own tight nipples
had his shaft throbbing inside his underbriefs. “Try lower,” he said. “Lower
down.”

“I don’t know…” K looked at the gel uncertainly. “If it hurts me
here…” She nodded at her full breasts with their tight, straining nipples. “I
can’t imagine how uncomfortable it’s going to feel between my legs.”

“Just try, darlin’,” Boone urged, trying to sound calm and
supportive. “Warm the gel up first—rub it between your fingertips.”

K did as he said, squirting out a small amount of the pinkish gel
and rubbing it between her thumb and fingertips for a few moments. Then,
hesitantly, she spread her legs and slipped her fingers between them.

Boone tried not to watch as she spread the plump outer lips of her
pussy and began to stroke her clit but it was impossible to pull his eyes away
from the erotic sight.

K shifted around some, twitching her hips restlessly as she probed
gingerly between her thighs. Despite her efforts, it soon became clear that she
wasn’t getting any relief.

“What’s wrong?” Boone asked her.
“Still cold?”

“No.” She shook her head and made a small, frustrated noise in the
back of her throat. “But it’s not working—I’m only making it worse.” She looked
up at Boone. “Is there supposed to be some kind of special technique for this?
Some method I ought to be using?”

“Couldn’t tell you,” he said dryly. “You’ve got different
equipment from what I’m used to, darlin’.”

“Yes, but you know how to do this—how to achieve a release. You
told me you did it all the time,” she accused.

“Well, not
all
the
time,” Boone objected. “That makes me sound like a freaking pervert.” Like
laying in the sleeping platform with her watching her try to get off was any
better. But he pushed the thought away.

“But you achieved this…this
release
you were talking about?” K persisted.

“Well, yeah. That’s kind of the point of the whole thing.” Boone
nodded.

“Then you can help me achieve it too.” She thrust the tube of
pinkish gel at him. “Can’t you?”

Boone bit the inside of his cheek until he tasted blood. Damn it,
he couldn’t do this—couldn’t take advantage of her innocence. He knew that. And
yet here she was
asking
him to touch
her.

“I shouldn’t,” he said, his voice coming out strangled. “You might
regret it later on.
When you understand more.
When you
know—”

“All I know is that I’m hurting. Please, Boone…” Her voice
softened and the look in her black eyes was pleading. “Please, help me.”

The look of uncertainty and pain on her lovely face was too much
for Boone. He knew K well enough to understand how much the plea for help cost
her. She valued her independence above all things. For her to allow herself to
beg for his assistance—it was the closest she’d come to an admission of
weakness.
To admitting that she needed him.
Boone
liked that more than he cared to admit—he
wanted
her to need him. To need him the way he needed her.

“All right,” he murmured at last.
“If you’re
sure.”

“I’ll be fine as long as you’re gentle,” K assured him. “You’ve
been contaminating me from the moment you took off my suit, Boone. This is just
another form of contamination, right?”

“Uh, I guess you could look at it that way.”
Although
he
certainly didn’t.
Boone
cleared his throat. “Okay, let’s get started. Loki said this
should
help. Here.” He pulled her
closer. “Get comfortable. Put your head on my arm.”

K did as he said, snuggling against his side and rested her head
on his left bicep with a soft, contented sigh. “This is nice, Boone,” she
murmured, looking up at him. “I…I’ve missed it. Missed having you contaminate
me…I mean,
touch
me.”

Boone was surprised and touched. “I’ve missed it too, sweetheart.
But I thought you didn’t want to be touched.”

“I don’t
want
to want to
be touched…but I want it anyway.” K shook her head. “Does that even make any
sense?”

“It makes perfect sense.” Pulling her closer, Boone dropped a
gentle kiss on her forehead. “I just wish you would have come to me sooner. I
missed touching you as much as you missed being touched.”