Purpose (30 page)

I tried to shake my head again, but Tristan
held my chin. “If this is what I’m meant to do...we’re all in big
trouble.”

He lips pushed into a small smile. “You did
fine,
ma lykita
. You just don’t have enough power yet. But
you will.”

Not enough Amadis power, anyway. It seemed
the Daemoni power in me had been plenty strong…almost strong
enough. If Mom and Rina hadn’t shown up when they did, I would
either be dead or the Daemoni blood would have won. Then all hell
could have broken loose. Literally. I would have rather been dead.
And nobody knew if I would always have to fight that Daemoni power,
even after the
Ang’dora
. The chance of the evil power
winning next time wasn’t worth taking. Sheree’s was the first and
last soul I would try to save. They would have to find something
different for me to do. Surely there were other roles I could
serve.

“How do you feel?” I asked, taking the cue
from Tristan and switching the focus from me and my
shortcomings.

“Hmm…not great. But better than I was. Don’t
worry about me.”

But I did worry about him. His eyes should
have returned to their normal beauty by now, but the gold still
sparked and the green remained dark and disturbed, like a murky
pond rather than bright emeralds.

“I’m fine, too, in case you were wondering,”
Owen piped up. He stood in the kitchen, munching on a handful of
crackers.

“Yeah, I can tell,” I said and I lifted an
eyebrow. “But how can you eat?”

“I’m refueling. You guys should eat, too.
Food equals goodness.” He grinned, his sapphire eyes shining
brightly.

My face twisted in a grimace. Right now, just
the thought of food equaled sick stomach. When I glanced at the
clock on the wall behind Owen, though, his hunger made sense. It
was nearly eight o’clock. We’d completely missed dinner.

Mom slipped inside then and sat on the coffee
table in front of Tristan and me. She took each of our hands and
pushed more Amadis power into us. After about a minute, I pulled my
hand from hers.

“He needs it more. Give it all to him,” I
told Mom.

She wrapped both hands around Tristan’s. The
sparks in his eyes finally returned to just gold flecks. They
didn’t shine brightly yet, but he looked better. I still shivered
next to him, but not quite as violently.

“That should help until we return,” Mom
said.

“Where are you going?” I asked.

“We need to get Sheree to a safe house.” She
studied my face, but she mistook my fearful expression. “We’ll
return as soon as possible. You’ll be okay until then.”

“But why do you have to leave? They’re out
there, waiting for you. For any of us,” I said, my voice rising an
octave with panic.

“No one’s out there right now, honey. They
apparently left when our first soldiers showed up.”

I hadn’t even realized we had fighters out
there, I was so consumed with everything else. “So we’re
protected?”

“Of course.” She patted my hand, then stood
and stepped back to the sliding glass doors to return to Rina and
Sheree.

“Mom?”

She turned to look at me.

“Dorian’s okay, right?”

She smiled. “Yes, honey. He’s in the safest
place he could possibly be.”

I nodded, then slumped back against
Tristan.

“We’ll be back soon. I promise.”

I cringed. The promise sounded too much like
the one Tristan had left me with. Things hadn’t turned out so well
that time.
They’ll be okay. They’re well protected.
I found
it difficult to convince myself, though. After all, there were real
monsters out there, out in the world. And one monster right there
with them.

I watched through the glass doors as Rina
lifted Sheree and placed her limp form in Mom’s arms. Her heavy
weight didn’t affect their graceful movements. They glided toward
the stairs and then disappeared out of sight. I said a silent
prayer for all of them—for Sheree’s successful conversion and for
Mom and Rina’s safe return. I knew I would need them. I just didn’t
realize how soon.

Tristan and I sat on the couch in silence for
a while as Owen rummaged around the kitchen. I hadn’t been to the
market since the day after I arrived and hadn’t purchased enough to
feed me for more than a few days, let alone all of us. When I’d
sent Owen the other night, he only bought steak and trimmings. So
the cupboards and refrigerator were fairly empty.

“Not much here,” Owen complained.

I still didn’t know how he could be hungry,
my own stomach still in knots. Of course, he’d probably been
through similar situations many times in the past. The experiences
were all new and overwhelming to me and add in the change of the
Ang’dora
that crept through my body, no wonder I felt so
tense. Tristan had apparently recovered, too. He left me in the
family room and joined Owen in the kitchen, in search of food.

“Can’t you just conjure something?” I teased
Owen as I finally rose from the couch, too.

“Not food, not without something to start
with,” he said, as if there was absolutely nothing in the house. I
knew better.

“Hmph, a lot of good you are.” Even if I
didn’t feel hungry, they obviously needed to be fed. “Watch
my
magic.”

I started pulling ingredients out of the
cabinets and fridge—leftover steak, a can of black beans, salsa,
the last of the eggs, cheese and tortillas. In no time, I whipped
up some breakfast burritos, while Tristan sliced a tomato and an
apple for us all to share. They dove into their food with enough
vigor you’d think they hadn’t eaten for days. The drain of helping
Sheree certainly left us feeling as empty as if we hadn’t, but I
had to force-feed myself a third of the apple. Even the tiniest bit
felt like a boulder in my constricted throat and my stomach was too
tied up to make room. It didn’t feel like it had earlier, as though
worms filled it. Now it just felt tight and tiny, as if it had
squeezed itself into the size of a walnut, too small for even a
slice of apple. But that seemed to be all I needed, anyway.

Renewed energy suddenly overtook my body.
Those synapses ticked through my nerves again, making my muscles
twitch with the need for exertion. I couldn’t sit still. After
cleaning the kitchen, I paced around the living room, wishing I
could run. I felt imprisoned inside the house.

“Can we go for a swim?” I asked. “If we stay
within the shield?”

I just needed to get out, to go. I didn’t
care what lurked beyond, as long as I could
move
. Owen and
Tristan exchanged a glance, then Owen shrugged.

“It’s just as safe now as it was this
morning. I don’t see why not,” he said.

I rushed into the destroyed Caribbean room
and changed into my suit. We raced to the water’s edge, all of us
there in a split second, although they still managed to beat me.
The water proved to be exactly what I needed. The tension washed
off like a coat of grime and the waves carried it away. After
swimming several laps, I lifted my legs and floated on my back,
staring at the quarter-moon.

The moon’s phase brought new meaning to me
now, knowing Weres roamed the world out there, barely able to
control themselves during a full moon. I wondered what they did
during those three days each month. Did they hide? Did they go
hunting? What did they hunt? I remembered Sheree’s vision of the
couple by the lake and a shudder overcame me.

Then I wondered how she was doing. I didn’t
know what came next for her or even how close she was to being
converted. It seemed Mom and Rina still had much work ahead of
them, removing all of the evil energy.
Then what?
I didn’t
know. Yet. And I didn’t want to think about it. If Tristan was
right, if saving souls was my purpose, I would eventually have to
learn. But not right now. Thinking about it only reminded me how
much I’d failed….how close I’d come to ending our lives.

Realizing the space around me had been quiet
for some time, I up-righted myself and tread water, looking around
for Tristan and Owen. Water dripped from my hair and into my eyes
and I wiped it away to be sure it wasn’t blinding me.
Nope
.
They were nowhere around. My heart stuttered.
Where are they?
Are they…gone?
I spun around in the water, my throat tightening
with each pounding heartbeat. Even in the night’s darkness, I could
see almost perfectly, as if the moon shone nearly as brightly as
the sun. But I couldn’t see them.

Several thoughts ran through my mind.
Protectors are keeping watch out there. I could call for them.
It’s too quiet for them to be there, though, and why can’t I see
them? Can I just try to find their thoughts, if they’re still here?
If I only had control and could make real use of my power…
. The
ideas raced too fast to even focus and settle on one as panic began
to overwhelm me.
Stupid. This was so stupid
.
Why had I
even asked to do this?

Then Owen’s head popped out of the water
right next to me, making me squeal.

“Holy crap! You scared the hell out of me!” I
shrieked. “Where’s Tristan?”

Owen lifted his hand out of the water and
pointed. “Down there.”

The breath whooshed out of me. Of course. He
could hold his breath indefinitely.

“I was wondering how long you could go now,”
Owen said. “Probably longer than a normal human. Maybe even as long
as Tristan.”

I raised an eyebrow. Owen gave me an
encouraging grin.

“We’re still safe, right?” I asked.

“I’m not an idiot. You wouldn’t be out here
if you weren’t.”

“Okay.” I took a deep breath and plunged
downward.

The salt water didn’t bother my eyes at all
and I could see almost as clearly under the water as I could in the
moonlight. Owen moved his hands beneath the surface and his head
appeared in front of mine. He held his hands over his mouth for a
few seconds and then he grinned, pointed ahead of us and led me a
little farther out, where Tristan swam along the bottom. Owen must
have used some kind of spell for himself, because he stayed under
far beyond the minute or two an average human could tolerate.

I could remain under water for a lot longer
than humanly possible, as well, but not nearly as long as they
could. After about fifteen minutes, I came up for a breath and dove
down again. The guys were still at the bottom, apparently
wrestling. I rolled my eyes and looked around for any fish life.
Many years ago, Tristan and I had snorkeled here. There hadn’t been
a ton of life, but there had been some. More than there seemed to
be now. I wondered if fish slept at night.

Then I saw movement farther out. My heart
leapt. The figure seemed to be at least as big as a human. But when
it came a little closer, a long, rounded nose pointed at me, I
realized what it was.
Holy crap! A freakin’ dolphin!
I took
off after it, leaving the guys to their childish antics. I wanted
to see how close the animal would let me get. I really wanted to
touch it, to feel its skin, but I didn’t expect it to let me. The
creature didn’t swim away, though. It seemed just as intrigued with
me as I was with it, watching me as I approached. It turned
slightly and I reached out my hand to touch its fin.

Water rushed past me. Then cool air, as if I
were in a wind tunnel. And then I stood on my feet in the sand, on
our little beach. Owen leaned over beside me, his hands on his
knees as he gasped for breath. Tristan appeared right next to
us.

Followed by a
Pop!
and then a splash
of water way out from the shore. A head emerged from the water, her
wet, blond hair shimmering like liquid silver in the moonlight.

“What the hell, Owen?” I demanded. “I thought
we were safe!”

“We…are,” he panted. “As long as…you
stay…in…the shield.”

I gulped. I hadn’t realized I’d swam out so
far. Vanessa tread water at least two football-fields away, at the
edge of the shield. Which meant I’d swam about one-hundred yards in
only a few seconds and Owen had taken less than two to bring me in
from where Vanessa was now.

“I’m sorry,” I said. “I didn’t realize….”

“It’s my fault,” Owen said, having caught his
breath. “I’m supposed to be watching you. Not screwing around.”

“It’s not like you can control my every
move.”

“So I’m learning,” he muttered. “Exactly why
I should be watching you more closely.”

“Let’s just get back to the house,” Tristan
said, taking my hand.

He turned his head toward Vanessa and growled
over his shoulder. I laughed under my breath. Petty, I knew,
especially because she couldn’t hear us behind the shield, yet
still satisfying. Several
Pops!
sounded across the water and
I turned to watch as Amadis protectors swarmed on her. She
disappeared again. The Amadis stayed in the water, ensuring she
didn’t come back, as we returned to the house. By the time we
climbed the stairs to the balcony, I could barely lift my legs or
hold my own weight. My flesh and bones felt as though they’d turned
into a leaden gel.

“That swim took a lot out of me,” I said,
falling into a balcony chair. “More than I realized. More than it
should have.”

“You need to eat something,” Tristan said.
“You didn’t touch your dinner.”

“No, Owen did for me.” I yawned. “That’s not
it, anyway. I still don’t think I could eat right now. I just feel
really
tired
again.”

I probably could have fallen asleep right in
the chair, except my body wouldn’t stop shivering. I went inside to
change out of the wet bathing suit and thought a hot shower was
exactly what I needed. I let the heat of the water and the rising
steam envelop me. But when the water started running cold, even
with the knob turned all the way to the H, I still shivered. I
finally gave up. I dressed in sweatpants, an old, long-sleeve
t-shirt and socks. I dragged the torn comforter and the only intact
pillow out to the living room and curled up on the couch. My body
felt heavy with exhaustion. I just wanted to sleep, but I couldn’t
stop shaking.