Authors: Evangeline Anderson
“You heard me.” Jonquil frowned at Merrick. “Go on now, boy, before I take my fist to you.”
“Jonquil, no!” Merrick’s mother pleaded, her voice soft. “It’s natural for him to be upset. He didn’t know.”
“He should have guessed.” Jonquil spat at the floor. “Did he think I’d take in a cast-off Kindred bitch and her half-breed whelp out of the goodness of my heart?” He looked at Merrick. “Nothing’s for free, boy—your mamam has to earn your keep. Now get out, so she can finish earning it.”
“I know something you’ve earned, Jonquil. You fucking earned it the first minute you forced my mother to do…to do this.” Merrick’s voice had grown deeper—a man’s voice. And the look in his eyes was so cold Elise wondered that his stepfather didn’t freeze on the spot.
“Going to dish me out a punishment, are you brat?” Jonquil gave an ugly laugh. “You’re not even a man yet. You haven’t spilled first blood.”
“No,” Merrick growled softly. “But I’m about to.”
“You dare to threaten me?” A knife suddenly appeared in Jonquil’s hand. “Come at me, boy. Do your worst.”
“Merrick, no!” his mother shouted but her words were lost in the full-throated roar coming from Merrick’s lips. He launched himself at his hated stepfather, armed with nothing but his bare hands and his fangs. Jonquil shouted and raised his knife, and then all hell broke loose.
Elise winced, wishing she could close her eyes. But Merrick had watched her ordeal, feeling the terror and pain right along with her—she owed it to him to watch until the end. So she wrapped her arms around herself and tried not to gasp and cry out as Merrick’s stepfather cut him, his long cruel knife biting into Merrick’s bare chest again and again in long slashes and stabs.
Merrick fought back, of course—giving as good as he was getting, though he was essentially unarmed. He was trying to go for Jonquil’s throat and several times he nearly succeeded, only to be held off by the older man’s longer reach. His mouth and his stepfather’s neck were both bloody but he hadn’t yet managed to nick any of the large arteries that pulsed under Jonquil’s pale skin.
Merrick’s mother was screaming on the bed and her two clients had finally gotten their pants up and beat a hasty retreat, sliding carefully around the man and boy fighting in the middle of the room.
Neither Merrick nor his stepfather could get the upper hand. Merrick was big for his age, but still just a boy and Jonquil was making good use of his knife.
Too
good, in fact—as Elise watched, Merrick threw himself forward and Jonquil dodged left and gave a vicious downward slice. The point of the knife started at Merrick’s scalp and bisected his eyebrow, causing blood to pour into his eye. He jerked to one side just in time to save his eyeball, but the blade continued down. It flayed open his cheek like raw meat so that Elise could see his teeth and gums where the knife had sliced into his face.
Merrick’s mother’s eyes widened as she saw the ugly wound as well. “Stop it, Jonquil—you’re hurting him! Stop now, both of you!” she screamed. Jumping off the bed, she threw herself between them.
Elise saw it all as if in slow motion. First, Merrick finally managed to get his fangs locked on the side of Jonquil’s throat. But at the same time, his stepfather raised the knife again, clearly intending to bury it in Merrick’s chest.
His mother got in the way.
Elise gasped in horror as she saw the silver blade pierce the slender, white throat and then slide outward, severing precious arteries in its random, hateful path. With a gurgle of pain, Merrick’s mother sank to her knees just as Merrick ripped out Jonquil’s throat.
Blood spurted everywhere, covering the three of them like scarlet paint. It was obvious to Elise that Merrick didn’t understand what had happened. He shook his stepfather like a dog shakes a rat, his fangs still buried in the other man’s throat. Only when Jonquil was limp in his arms did he happen to glance down…down at his mother, who was writhing weakly at his feet with blood still leaking from her neck.
With a gasp, he dropped Jonquil’s lifeless form and scrambled to take his mother in his arms.
“Mother!
Mamam,”
he cried. Frantically he tried to cover the wound in her neck, but it was clearly too late. The blood was no longer jetting from the severed artery—it was a sluggish flow now that would soon stop. Under its spattering of red droplets, Merrick’s mother’s face was as pale as paper. As white as death.
“Merrick,” she whispered, reaching for him with one hand. Somehow she managed to cup his unwounded cheek. “Sorry…so sorry.”
“Don’t go.” There were tears in Merrick’s mismatched eyes. “Don’t leave me. I don’t care what you were doing—I don’t care about anything, Mamam. Just don’t go.”
“Have to.” Her voice was little more than a whisper now and Elise wondered how she could talk at all with such a horrible wound in her throat. “You…go too,” she told Merrick. “Go back…Rageron. Stay with…father’s brothers. Keep you…safe. Love…you.” The last words were so soft Elise could barely hear them.
“I’m not going anywhere without you,” Merrick told her but he was talking to a corpse. Somehow the life had leaked out of his mother’s eyes, leaving them as cold and empty as green glass marbles.
She was gone.
Merrick sobbed convulsively and crushed her to his chest. “Mamam…Mamam…
no.”
It was a cry from his heart, a plea that fell on deaf ears. Elise, watching him, found that she was crying too. Sobbing right along with Merrick as her heart broke for the boy he had been and the man he had become. Kneeling there in that blood-soaked room she watched him lose his innocence as surely as she had lost hers when her stepfather had ripped it from her. They had both lost something irretrievable at a young age. They had both been stained and wounded by a cruel fate.
“Enough,” she whispered. And then, louder, “
Enough
. Please, make it stop. I…I can’t take anymore.”
Slowly, the scene faded and she found she was back on the leaf-covered bed in the dim hut on Rageron. Merrick was sitting beside her, his hands clasped in his lap, staring straight ahead. He said nothing and made no sound, but tears ran down his cheeks and dripped onto the shadowy floor.
“Merrick,” she whispered, taking one of his hands between her own. “I didn’t know. I’m so sorry you had to go through that again.”
He shook his head. “Had to be done. You had to see…had to know.” He looked at her, his eyes still wet. “I was so eager to come of age, but the first blood I ever spilled was my own mother’s.”
“It wasn’t you,” Elise protested. “It was your stepfather—that Jonquil bastard. He stabbed her with the knife!”
“That stroke was meant for me.” Merrick looked away. “I should have died that day—not her. Never her.”
“She wouldn’t have wanted that. I’m sure she wouldn’t.” Leaning forward, Elise cupped his scarred cheek in her hand and turned his face toward hers. “She loved you, Merrick. I could see it, even in that short amount of time. You meant
everything
to her.”
“I know. She wouldn’t have whored herself out, otherwise.” He swiped at his eyes. “She was supporting me the only way she could, but I didn’t see it until too late.”
“How could you?” Elise demanded indignantly. “You were so
young
.”
“You were too, baby.” Merrick took the hand that was cupping his cheek and kissed it gently. “I’ve never really been able to forget what happened that night,” he told her in a low voice. “I mean, I pushed it to the back of my mind, but I never really blocked it all the way out. But you…”
“I had everything tucked away.” Elise sighed. “Buried. Out of sight, out of mind. Now, well, I guess I’ll have to deal with it.”
“We can deal with it together,” Merrick said softly. “We’re both broken, baby…both fucking damaged beyond repair. But maybe between the two of us, we can make a whole. You think?”
Elise thought of what she’d been through that night—reliving the rape all over again, losing her only means of dealing with the past when the vault was smashed to smithereens. Then she thought of what she’d just witnessed—Merrick ripping out his stepfather’s throat and holding his dying mother in his arms.
Between the two of them, they had enough emotional baggage to start their own luggage store.
But he understands,
she thought, looking at the tear tracks on his scarred cheeks.
He knows what it’s like to hurt so badly you want to die. To have no one to understand you.
No one until now,
she heard a soft, gruff voice in her head.
Her eyes widened and she looked up at Merrick. “Did you just…”
“Yeah.” He nodded. “Guess our bond has deepened again. Not only can we feel each other’s emotions, now we can hear each other’s thoughts.”
“I’m not sure how I feel about that,” Elise said tentatively. “But I think…I think I like it.”
“I do too.” Merrick sighed. “Too bad we’ll lose it when we dissolve the bond.” He looked at Elise. “But we won’t lose everything—it’s important you know that, baby. Important you believe it.”
“I believe it,” Elise said quietly. “I believe
you,
Merrick. And if…when the bond is dissolved and we’re separated, if you still want me, well, I’m yours. I’ll tell James the wedding is off and I’ll stay with you. I—”
But she couldn’t finish because Merrick had gathered him to her in a bear hug so tight she could hardly breathe.
“You won’t be sorry,” he whispered in her ear. “Even without the bond, I’ll love you. Love you forever, baby.”
“Oh, Merrick…” Elise felt tears squeezing from her eyes as she hugged him back, breathing in his wild, dark scent that made her feel so safe and comforted. “I love you too,” she whispered. “I love you, too.”
* * * * *
Merrick was having a nightmare—Elise was in some kind of danger and he couldn’t get to her.
“I’m coming,”
he told her over and over.
“I’ll be right there, baby—I swear!”
But it seemed as though someone had dipped his feet in lead and no matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t reach her.
And then the voice began.
“That’s right, come for her,”
it hissed in his ear and even the sound of it caused him pain. Merrick looked down and saw wounds opening up on his chest and arms. Blood flowed in rivulets down his skin, exactly as if someone had sliced him with a knife.
“Come to get her, Hybrid. Before it’s too late…”
“You bastard!”
Merrick struggled against the inertia of the dream.
“Leave her alone. Take me if you have to, but leave Elise the fuck alone—”
A piercing scream penetrated his dream and he sat up at once, reaching for the knife he always kept in his boot. “What the fuck?” He looked around, instantly alert, and saw Elise thrashing on the bed beside him.
“Don’t,” she moaned. “Don’t let him have me! The Darkness…the Darkness that eats the Stars…”
“Elise … Baby …” Merrick replaced the knife swiftly and scooped her into his arms. They were still on the low sleeping platform in the healing hut and someone—probably Mother-Healer—had covered them with a loose coverlet of
yanyan
leaves. “It’s all right,” he murmured, holding Elise close, comforting her as he had before on the Mother Ship. “Everything’s all right. I’m here.”
Her eyes flew open and then squeezed shut again as she encircled his neck in a panicky hug. “Oh, Merrick! It was so bad…so awful.” The words came spilling out and she seemed helpless to stop them. “I dreamed he had me—he had me and he wouldn’t let me go. You were trying to get to me, but you couldn’t. And every word the man said…it
cut
you—like a knife. You were bleeding everywhere but you were still trying to get to me. I was so afraid for you…”
The similarity in their dreams wasn’t lost on Merrick. “Shh, baby, shh, it’s all right,” he rumbled, stroking her shivering back gently. “But what man are you talking about? Who was cutting me with his words?”
“I…I don’t know.” She pulled back, away from him, her brown eyes wet with tears. “The man with the silver eyes. He was so strange…handsome, but…but there was something
wrong
about him. Something
missing
. I can’t explain it any better than that.” She shook her head. “What does it mean?”
“I don’t know.” Merrick rubbed a hand over his face and sighed wearily. “I’d like to say it’s only a dream, but we
are
in the center of the Deep Blue. Some people claim to have visions here.”
“I had a dream like that once before.” Elise frowned. “Back when I was coming out of stasis, I think. It was so awful I blocked it out until now.” She shook her head. “Do you think it’s just one more thing escaping from the vault? Something else I made myself forget that’s coming back to haunt me now?”
“I hope so.” Merrick frowned. “Yeah, I’m sure that’s it. It probably leaked from your mind to mine through the bond.”
But inside, he wondered. He was careful to shield his thoughts from Elise but he vowed to himself that they would leave the Deep Blue tomorrow and fly back to the Mother ship as fast as possible. He wanted to have Elise somewhere safe, somewhere they could start their life together after the bond was dissolved. Somewhere he could protect her and love her forever.
Elise wasn't the only one having bad dreams. Light years away, Xairn, twitched in his sleep, groaning softly as the vision tormented him yet again.
"What's the matter, lover boy?"
a woman's voice—a terribly familiar voice—whispered in his ear.
In the dream, Xairn turned with a start, trying to find the source of the voice—the source of the danger. He was standing in a long, dark hallway and he could see nothing. Nothing at all.
"Do you miss me?"
whispered the soft, familiar voice and this time it sounded like she was right beside him.
"Miss me like I miss you?"
"Who are you?"
Xairn demanded, looking around.
"What do you want with me?"
"Why, I want the same thing you want, of course."
Suddenly, a slender feminine figure appeared, gliding toward him out of the darkness. She had pale blue skin and luminous pink eyes that seemed to take up most of her face.
"What you've always wanted from me,"
she continued.