Pursued By The Viscount (17 page)

He narrowed his eyes. “You prefer to let everyone else worry on your behalf.”

She removed her hand from his. “I meant no inconvenience to anyone, simply did what I had to do. What I felt was right.”

Lucien glared his frustration with her stubbornness. “I still intend to spank you at the earliest opportunity.”

“You are welcome to try,” she challenged.

“Oh, I will do more than try,” he assured her grimly.

Rachel pulled her cloak about her defensively as she sat beside him in frustrated silence for the rest of the journey to her home. He truly was the most impossibly arrogant man she had ever had the misfortune to meet.

But also the most caring.

The most handsome.

The most satisfying lover any woman could ever wish for.

He was also the man she loved with her whole heart.

Lucien had never hurt her, would never hurt her. She had every confidence he could never hurt her, because he was totally incapable of physically hurting her or any other woman.

Her decision made, Rachel straightened. “I will submit.”

“What?” He stared at her blankly.

She drew in a shaky breath. “I will submit to having you spank me.”

He eyed her warily. “Why?”

“Because you are quite correct. If anything had happened to me, then William would have been left an orphan. He deserves a better future than that.”

Lucien no longer had any idea what to do or say to this woman, felt as if he had reached a crossroads and had no idea which way to proceed. Seeing Rachel again, being with her,
kissing
her again, he felt more alive than he had since he had last been in her company. And instead of groveling at her feet, begging her to take him back as her lover as he should have done, he had growled and snarled at her and threatened to spank her.

When all he really wanted to do was kiss her and make love to her. To become one with her again. To bury himself so deep inside her, he became a part of her and she became a part of him.

He sat back with a sigh. “I will never spank you again.”

“But—” She broke off what she had been about to say as the carriage came to a halt outside her home.

The silence inside the carriage was palpable, with Lucien having no idea how to break it, even knowing that at any moment his groom was going to open the carriage door and Rachel was going to step outside. He would watch until she entered her home safely, and then he would drive away. He would never see her again, unless it was at a social function, or the future christening of the Blackmoors’ unborn child.

“Not even if I asked, begged you, to do so?”

Lucien turned to her sharply. “Why on earth would you do that?”

Rachel knew she could allow her pride to continue to hold sway, to allow Lucien to drive away from her, possibly forever. Or she could be honest with herself and with Lucien.

She drew in a deep breath and opted for the latter. “Because afterward, you would make love to me again.”

“Close it,” he instructed the groom as the other man opened the door for Rachel to alight. “You told Blackmoor there was nothing more than friendship between us.”

“Because I was not sure you would want him to know the extent of our relationship.” Past tense, because the man seated beside her, closed off and closed in, was not the arrogant and demanding man who had become her lover. It gave Rachel a small glimmer of hope that he was—could be—something more.
 

“Why would I care what Blackmoor or anyone else thought about the two of us being together?” He looked genuinely puzzled.
 

“Because he is your friend.”

“And you are—were—my lover. A fact I did not attempt to deny when he put the same question to me.”

Rachel studied Lucien searchingly, noting the tension in his body. The grimness of his expression. The torment of uncertainty in his dark blue eyes.

Revealing that Lucien was as afraid of rejection as she was? That he had seen her denial that day of the depth of their relationship as being a denial of him?

“I did not deny
you
, Lucien, I would never do that. I only answered as I did to protect your reputation, not my own.” She spoke gruffly. “If you thought it was for any other reason, then I apologize.”

“Apology accepted,” he bit out abruptly. “Damn it, we cannot part with this conversation unfinished.”

“Then will you come inside?” she prompted almost shyly.

That nerve pulsed in his jaw. “I cannot be answerable for my actions once the two of us are alone together.”

A thrill ran through her at his admission. “Will you come inside with me?” she repeated, meeting Lucien’s gaze unflinchingly as he studied her in silence for several seconds.

Some of the tension eased out of his body, his expression appearing less grim, when he finally nodded in acceptance of her invitation.

Chapter 16

Having dismissed his driver and carriage, Lucien followed Rachel inside Shaw House. It would give rise to gossip if his distinctive carriage remained outside her home for any length of time late at night.

There was no conversation between them as he followed Rachel up the wide staircase, having given her cloak and his hat and cane to the butler.

She paused at the top of the stairs. “Would you care to wait in my bedchamber while I go to the nursery and check on William?”

“I will come with you. I became fond of William while we were all in Dover,” he added at Rachel’s surprised glance. The little boy, once assured his mother was near, had clung to Lucien unashamedly, no doubt having looked upon him as his savior.

Rachel nodded. “I believe your affection to be reciprocated. William has asked for you several times this past week,” she explained as Lucien raised questioning brows.

A frown appeared between his eyes. “Why did you not send word? I would have come to offer him reassurances of his safety if I had known.”

It was painful for Rachel to acknowledge Lucien would have come for William’s sake but had not come for her own. “You are here now.”

“By circumstance rather than arrangement.” He scowled.

Rachel turned fully to face him. “Can we not cease being angry with each other for one imagined slight or another?” She sighed.

His expression softened. “I am not angry with you, Rachel. I am… It is…” He shook his head. “We will talk again once we have visited William.”

It felt strange to Rachel to have a gentleman standing next to her in her son’s bedchamber, looking tenderly down at William as he slept. Having secured his heir, James had shown no further interest in William or Rachel, had only seen his son perhaps half a dozen times before his death. William never spoke of him. In fact, Rachel was not even sure he remembered his father.

It was Lucien her son had asked for this past week, not James.

“He looks angelic when he is asleep,” Lucien murmured so as not to wake the boy.

Rachel laughed softly as the two of them turned to leave the nursery. “Do not be deceived by appearances. William can be a holy terror when he is awake.”

“I am pleased to hear it.”

She gave a rueful shake of her head as they stepped out into the hallway. “Spoken as someone who was no doubt another holy terror as a boy.”

“You could be right. As much as I am able, I have tried to forget my own childhood,” Lucien admitted.

Rachel winced. “I am sorry for that.”

He shrugged broad shoulders. “It showed me how not to behave with my own children.”

It felt as if a knife pierced Rachel’s heart as she imagined Lucien married with sons of his own. He must marry, of course, needed an heir to continue the earldom that would one day be his own.

Lucien had no idea what he had said to bring about that sad expression in Rachel’s face and eyes. Or the way she now hesitated in taking him to her bedchamber. “If you have changed your mind…”

She straightened. “I have not.”

“Then shall we…?” He stood back to allow her to precede him down the hallway to her bedchamber. She walked confidently, her back straight, head held at a proud angle.

Until they were in her bedchamber, and then she looked uncertain again. “I really meant you no offense this past week, Lucien.” She looked up at him imploringly with those beautiful dark brown eyes. “I merely thought… I believed we had trespassed upon your goodwill enough.”

“My
goodwill
?” Lucien lost all semblance of calm as he glowered at her from his far superior height. “The son of my lover had been kidnapped, causing her immeasurable distress, and you refer to my actions thereafter as
goodwill
? Fuck goodwill, Rachel. Fuck
you
.” His hands were clenched at his sides.

“Lucien—”

“Do not attempt to placate me, madam, I am far beyond that.” He began to pace the bedchamber. “How dare you presume— How could you ever think I acted out of
goodwill
?” He came to an abrupt halt to glare his frustration and anger.

“Perhaps that was the wrong choice of word—”
 

“Perhaps?” he repeated in disgust. “You will have to do a damn sight better than that feeble attempt, madam, if you think to soothe my temper.”

Rachel stared at him wordlessly for several long seconds. Lucien’s fury was unmistakable. Understandable? Perhaps, if by some miracle, he cared for her as much as she cared for him. It was a risk for her even to hope that might be the case, but she was now beyond even that measure of pride. She knew if she allowed Lucien to walk away from her now, he might never come back.

“What are you doing?” Lucien demanded as Rachel sank gracefully to her knees in front of him and proceeded to unfasten the buttons of his breeches.

She gave him a wicked glance through thick lashes. “I am attempting to soothe your temper.”

Lucien wanted to cling on to his loss of temper, to vent that fury by continuing to berate Rachel. But it was fast becoming impossible for him to think of anything else when she had now released his rapidly engorging cock into her caressing hands.

He gave a low groan as her fingers stroked along that length, the soft pad of her thumb caressing the bulbous tip, sending pleasure coursing down his lengthy cock and causing his balls to pull up tight beneath. “Rachel…!” His hands moved to become entangled in her hair as her tongue flicked out to lick up the drops of fluid now leaking through the slit at the top of his cock. He gave another groan as her lips parted and she took that mushroom head completely into the heat of her mouth.

Rachel had no way of answering him when her mouth was full, and she so enjoyed hearing his groans of pleasure as her head bobbed up and down and she took him to the back of her throat. Her fingers curled about the length she could not take into her mouth, squeezing and caressing in the same rhythm as her tongue stroked along that responsive length.

This
was what she had wanted, where she had longed to be these past seven lonely days and nights.

She increased her endeavors, Lucien’s hips thrusting and then pistoning forward, her tongue greedily lapping up the salty sweet fluid escaping the bulbous tip.

“You have to stop, or I am going to release!” Lucien’s fingers were tight on her shoulders, separating her mouth from his cock. His eyes were dark and stormy as he pulled her to her feet. “Take off your clothes.”

Her cheeks felt warm, her lips slightly puffy when she turned so that Lucien could unfasten the buttons at the back of her gown. Their gazes remained locked on each other, both of them naked within seconds.

Lucien moved to swing Rachel up in his arms. “Before we proceed any further, you should know that I love you,” he told her softly.

A sob caught at the back of her throat. “You do?”

He nodded. “And I fully expect to love and be in love with you for the rest of my life.”

It was more than Rachel had dared hope for. More than she had ever dreamed was possible.

“I do not expect you to feel the same way about me as yet, but I promise I will do everything within my power to ensure that one day you do.” He placed her carefully on the bed before following her down to lie at her side. “Marry me, Rachel. Be my wife, my viscountess, mother of my children?”

No,
this
was more than Rachel had ever dreamed possible.

“I love you so much.” Lucien moved to lie between her parted thighs, his weight on his elbows as he began to rain slow and lingering kisses over her face and throat. “Please say you will consider marrying me, Rachel.” He lifted his head. “We are more than compatible in bed. I love your son already. I love
you
more than life itself. I will do all within my power to ensure you grow to love me—”

“I already love you.” She glowed up at him, her arms moving joyously about his shoulders as she lifted her legs and wrapped them tightly about his hips. “I love you, Lucien. I am deeply
in
love with you.”

“Thank God!” Lucien proceeded to kiss her, passionately,
possessively
.

Eventually Rachel rested her forehead against his as they stared into each other’s eyes. “I only kept my distance from you this past week because I thought you did not return my feelings. I thought to spare you the discomfort of having to extricate yourself from our affair.”