Queen (7 page)

"I'm not asking to butt into your business. It's just that the boys are… I've come to…" She turned and started to walk back into the house, realizing that she'd overstepped her bounds.

"I'm having nightmares. Hellfire-and-brimstone-breathing nightmares. I've had them ever since the night I came to in the Saudi desert after ejecting from the jet and realized I couldn't see my hand in front of my face."

Queen shuddered. The lack of emotion in his voice made the telling of his story all the more horrifying. She could do nothing but listen, because there was nothing left to say.

"I realized moments later that I was blinded by blood, not the accident, yanked the helmet off my head, and cleared my vision. I checked to see if my location transmitter was sending. It was. I knew it would only be a matter of time before someone found me. But the longer I waited, the less certain I became that it would be the right side. I could hear as well as see the ground fire. That told me I was too damned close to enemy lines for ground rescue. I started trying to walk out."

"Trying?"

"Broke my left leg."

Queen closed her eyes and swallowed the lump in her throat. So much pain. Why did people have to endure so much pain?

"Were you captured?"

"Naw," he said, and grinned. "But it took our side two days to get to me."

Queen was horrified. He had crashed in the middle of a war, been left two days without food and water, and had had to walk on broken bones. "And the cops in Denver caught you without a fight." She hadn't realized she'd said the last of her thoughts aloud.

Cody jerked as if she'd just socked him in the middle of the back. He stared into the shadows and then started to grin. And then he laughed. Surprised by the sound of it, he stopped almost instantly. It had been a long time in coming, but afterward he felt a strange sort of relief, as if a few old fears had gone along with it.

"So, you're worried about your dreams," Queen said. "Dreams can't hurt you, Cody Bonner. Only people can hurt you."

"I know that. That's why I'm scared as hell. My in-laws, the Whittiers, will show up when I least expect them. They'll use what just happened, as well as the fact that I'm a single father with no extra help, to prove my lack of parental worth. They'll try to take my kids away again… I just know it. Ever since Claire's death, they seem to have lost perspective." He sighed. "It didn't help that I went missing for several days, either. When the war was over, that was the main reason I took early retirement. I suddenly realized my boys had come too damned close to being made orphans."

Unknown to either of them, J.J. had slipped outside and had been standing in the dark, listening. Reacting to the fear in his father's voice, he slipped his arms around one of Queen's long legs and started to cry.

"I don't want to live with Grandma or Grandpa Whittier. I want to stay here with you and Daddy."

Without hesitation Queen bent down and lifted the child into her arms. She hugged him gently. "You're going to be fine, honey," she said softly. "Your daddy is a big, tough guy, right?" She smiled at the urgent nod of the boy's head and couldn't resist pressing a kiss on the crown of his head. "He won't let anyone hurt you, ever."

"Promise?" J.J. asked.

Queen looked across J.J.'s shoulders toward Cody Bonner. "Promise," she said, staring intently into his eyes.

Cody was impressed by the way Queen had held his son, as if she truly cared. With J.J. she was soft and gentle and had openly touched and caressed as easily as she took a breath. He had not known that side of her even existed and suddenly realized why his boys had accepted her so quickly.

It was that thought and the look she gave him that prompted Cody to do something he would later realize was unforgivable. But at the moment he'd have done anything to insure his boys welfare, and having an on-site nanny when the Whittiers made their appearance would help immensely.

"Would you stay?" he asked her, and then, before she could voice the objection he saw on her face, he added, "Just until the Whittiers come and go? It would help my case if I had a housekeeper in residence. I'd pay you for your time, of course. It would be nothing more than a job of baby-sitting, and then you could be on your way."

"Yeah!"

J.J. shrieked and wiggled to be put down. Queen let him go without removing her gaze from Cody's face. When the child had disappeared out of sight and sound, she let her fury fly.

"How dare you? How dare you put me on the spot in front of that child? You knew I couldn't say no in front of him. He's been hurt enough as it is."

Cody stood his ground. "Well? Will you?" He was determined to get what he needed with no regard for what it might cost others.

Queen shuddered and drew herself up to her full height of nearly six feet. Then she came up so close to him that he could feel her breath.

"I'll stay," she said. "But like I told you before, only for the boys. And you know something else, mister?"

He shook his head, wondering if he should be afraid to hear what she thought.

"For a short time earlier this evening, I thought you were different, but you're not. You're no different from any man I've ever known. They'll do or say whatever they have to just to get what they want, and anyone who stands in their way can move or go to hell. For now… I'll stay. But after your in-laws leave, I'm gone."

Just when Cody thought she was finished with him, she added a postscript that hit home in a particularly vulnerable place.

"I'll be the housekeeper and nothing else, and don't you forget it. I take care of your boys and their needs… not yours. If you so much as look at me cross-eyed, or try to make a move on me, I'll shorten your life span, and everything else that matters on your body… and it'll hurt when I do."

She stomped away, leaving an aura of heat and hate in her wake. He shuddered. He'd been right to be afraid after all.

He'd had an instant impression of a cat, hackles raised, claws unsheathed, spitting and clawing at everything within reach.

My God. I must be losing my mind. I just asked a total stranger to stay in our home and look after the most precious thing in my life, my children. And if I'm not mistaken, she just threatened to neuter me if I get too close.

Cody shook his head and then straightened as determination sharpened his features. If he'd been as tough as a man should be and not gone to see the damned psychiatrist, none of this would have happened. But, he told himself, it won't happen again. I won't let it.

Within the space of a week, Queen had gone from the Houston household, which was dominated by females both in number and in strength of character, to an entirely male-oriented one. Everywhere she turned she was instantly reminded that she was living in a whole new world.

Male paraphernalia abounded: jockey shorts and model cars, rubber snakes and comic books depicting musclebound heroes. It would have been laughable if she'd had someone to share the joke with. But the Bonners saw little humor in her offhand remarks and often missed the point of them altogether.

With the return of Cody Bonner, the sleeping arrangements had shifted to accommodate Queen's temporary residence. Donny willingly gave up his room to her and moved in with Will and J.J. The two younger boys in turn offered to share a bed so that Donny could have one of his own. None of them seemed to mind giving up their space, but getting all three to sleep at night had become something of an unending marathon.

Being in close proximity to so many males of varying age and size made something happen to Queen that she hadn't expected. She began to miss her father. Alive, he'd been the bane of her existence as well as a constant source of shame; but suddenly she found herself longing to recapture that part of her old life.

Johnny Houston's death had come without warning, as unexpected as all of his plans had been. He'd gone to Whitelaw's Bar, as he had every day since they'd moved to Cradle Creek, and that night he hadn't come home. He'd died as he'd lived, playing cards.

Burying him had come and gone while Queen and her sisters had been in a state of shock. It was only now. with nothing and no one left to worry about except herself, that she allowed herself to grieve, and as she did, she felt able finally to forgive him for the loss of her childhood.

Queen forced herself to concentrate on the basket of laundry she was struggling to carry. She had plenty to do here without letting her emotions get the best of her. Later, when she was alone, she would let the feelings come and remember Johnny… and her sisters. For now there was too much work to do.

She dumped an armful of wet clothes into the dryer and then filled the washer she'd just emptied with another load of dirty clothes. Laundry was never-ending.

"Need anything from town?" Cody asked.

His question, as well as his presence, surprised her. She dumped the soap into the washer, spun the dial, and slammed the lid before she answered.

She thought for a moment about what she was going to ask and then decided that if one of them should be embarrassed, he could be the one. It was his fault she was here. He had to be ready for women and all that came with them.

"As a matter of fact, I do," she said. "Do you want me to make a list, or is your memory as good as your manners?"

"I'm not quite sure how to take that," Cody said, and grinned.

Queen looked away, unwilling to take another of his smiles full force. They did funny things to her equilibrium.

Cody dug a folded list from his shirt pocket and looked around for something with which to write. Queen calmly handed him a pen that she'd confiscated from the pocket of a dirty shirt.

"Thank you," he said. "Fire away, I'm ready."

That remains to be seen, Queen thought. "I need several things," she began. "Deodorant. Environmentally safe, powder-fresh scent. I'm nearly out, and I don't want to borrow. Besides, women shouldn't smell like pine forests."

He grinned and wrote it down.

"Shampoo. Get something with a built-in conditioner."

He thoughtfully eyed the thick mass of her auburn curls as he added shampoo to the list. Her hair wasn't the only thing about her that was hard to manage.

"Now on to feminine hygiene. I need—"

"Wait!" His command came on the heels of a faint flush and a slightly embarrassed expression. "Now we're losing ground."

She grinned. "If you ask me, we're not losing anything but our composure."

He tilted his head back and laughed. "Okay, lady, I have an idea. Why don't you go to town and get what you need along with what's on my list while I finish the laundry."

His suggestion left her stunned.

"You'd trust me to come back? Just like that? What makes you think I won't keep driving?"

"Because you gave me your word," he said. "And for some reason, I don't think you do that lightly."

She inhaled sharply and turned away, unwilling for him to see the amazement on her face. She wasn't used to being read quite this easily. It was an uncomfortable feeling.

"So what's it going to be… are you going or not?" he asked.

The back door slammed. They both turned at the same time, checking to see which Bonner had come in the house. It was Will, the slender shadow who had quietly accepted her presence with less fuss than she would have expected.