Real Vampires Have Curves (30 page)

A flat butt, what a body issue. I didn't have to look back to know my own butt was
ass
tronomical.

“So what about after the shower? When you got dressed? Couldn't you take a chance and read his mind then?”

“I got up my nerve and reached for his glasses, but he got all antsy. Had to go, early class, a bunch of excuses that a few minutes before hadn't existed. I'm afraid he's got another girlfriend. One with a nice ass like yours.” Lacy was still pacing.

Have I mentioned how much I love Lacy? “Come back into the storeroom with me.” Valdez still snoozed by the door. In the hours just before dawn, we were never busy. I should probably close, but it gave me time to catch up on paperwork.

Lacy plopped on a chair in the storeroom. “It smells funny in here.”

“Bug spray.” I nodded toward the shelf. “Ryan ever talk about his bug fetish?”

“What?” She sat up straight. “That's ridiculous. He's not into bugs.” She looked thoughtful. “Though I have to admit he's got a hard-on for old comic books about superheroes that I find a little weird. Did you know there's a vampire
hunter
named Blade in one series?”

“Lacy, concentrate here. You want to know why Ryan's acting funny about his glasses. You want to know if he has another girlfriend. And I think his glasses are keeping us from reading his mind. They're so thick.”

“Maybe they
are
blocking us.” Lacy got a gleam in her eyes. “Do you think we can work together to get them off him? I would like to know about that girlfriend situation. I haven't used my cat strength on him yet, but he
does
work out.”

“I can hold him long enough for you to get his glasses off, then I'll try to do the whammy. If I can get him under, we can ask him all the questions we want. And I'll be able to read his mind. So will you.”

“Why do you want to read his mind?”

“I told you. It's just a funny feeling I've got. We needed help in the shop and you immediately met Ryan who's perfect for it. Coincidence?”

“Stranger things have happened. I call it synchronicity. The universe provided Ryan just when we needed him—a lover for me and a clerk for you.” Lacy winced. “You're right. I've lived too long to believe in coincidences. But I really think Ryan's legit. He's a great salesman.” She sighed. “He's sure sold me.”

“Obviously. And I hope you're right, Lacy. But since we both have questions, I think we need to take a shot at reading his mind.” Now I felt guilty. I'd gotten Lacy worked up and I had absolutely no proof that Ryan was anything but a lucky hire for me.

“What if it doesn't work? What if he gets mad at us?” Lacy's eyes filled. “I love him, Glory.”

“We blame me. I'm a crazed woman, determined to give him a makeover. Have to see what he looks like without his glasses.”

Lacy giggled. “Yep, I think that'll play. He likes you, but he does wonder about some of your friends.”

“
I
wonder about some of my friends. So what do you say? Are you in? Do we take down Ryan together?”

“Sure. When is this intervention going to take place?”

“Monday. When we're closed. Tell him I've got another commission check for him. About nine o'clock here in the shop.”

“That's still a few days away. In the meantime, I'll keep working on those glasses. I hate to see us use violence.”

I patted Lacy's shoulder. She
was
a little bony. “I'm sure it's just my raging paranoia. Ryan's probably fine, just into a few weird hobbies.”

“I hope you're right. I can deal with bugs and graphic novels. But if he's cheating . . . He swears we're exclusive, but he's been out of pocket a few evenings and gave me vague excuses. ” Lacy slid off the stool and walked to the door. “Damn it. I'm freaking out. I'm going hunting before I relieve you here. See you in a few.”

I watched her snarl at Valdez, who didn't even bother to look up, then she was gone. An intervention. I glanced up at the shelf where the cockroach still sat in a puddle of spray. Maybe I'd get some answers to questions I wasn't even sure I had.

"Are we going to church tonight, Flo?” I was still in my robe and lounging on the love seat while sipping my wake-up Bloody Merry.

“I asked Ricardo to take us. Do you mind?” Flo was brushing out her long dark hair.

“I think
he'll
mind, Flo. I'm not his favorite person.” Well, shoot. I'd really looked forward to going to church and sitting through the whole service this time. “Are you sure you trust him? He hates me.”

“I know, Glory.” Flo frowned and set down the brush. “I don't understand it. He hates Damian too. Which I do understand. My brother is not popular with other men.”

“Casanova wouldn't be. But I've done nothing to Richard except chew him out for failure to blend. He needs to get over it.” And I needed to get over my mistrust if Flo and Ricardo were going to be a couple. He was here almost every night when I got home from the shop. So Valdez—who seemed to tolerate Richard better than I did—and I had to hang out in the living room with the TV loud enough to drown out the sounds coming from Flo's bedroom or give up TV and hole up in my bedroom. Obviously watching me read wasn't Valdez's entertainment of choice.

“I'm sorry we disturb you, Glory.” Flo got a faraway look. “We will go to Ricardo's place from now on. I promise.”

“I don't want to run you off.” Maybe I should put up a block to Flo. This mind reading was really getting to be a drag. But at least we were communicating.

“I've been inconsiderate. But if you would just decide on a lover of your own, you could make your own noises.” Flo looked me over. “Are you going to get dressed? Please don't stay home because of Ricardo.”

I should just decide on a lover. The Florence da Vincis of the world could do that. Just decide and the man would worship at their feet or any other body part that needed attention. I got up and went into the kitchen to get a fresh can of Bloody Merry.

I really didn't want to spend an evening with Richard. He made me uneasy. No matter how devoted he seemed to Flo I knew he still hated me, and was that fair? I was nice to him when he came over. Well, maybe nice is an overstatement. But I tolerated him for Flo's sake.

“I think I'll stay home. The service is carried on one of the local stations, isn't it?”

“TV's not the same as being there, Glory. Please come with us.”

I turned on the TV and found the guide channel. “No, look. It's on later. This way I can enjoy my night off, relax and still hear the great music.” I grinned. “And if I float during the hymns, then only Valdez will see me.”

“Now I feel bad. I'll call Richard and tell him that I'll stay home too.”

“No, you don't.” I walked to my bedroom door. “I'm going to shower and wash my hair. I'll expect you to be gone by the time I get out.” I looked at Valdez. “It's steak night, pup. Rib eye, rare.” I'd learned over the years that my dog needed red meat at least once a week. Not the dog food variety either. The rest of the time, he was happy to chow down on whatever junk food we had in the cupboard.

“Fine. But I will go to Ricardo's after the service and spend the night and day there.” Flo winked. “Maybe you invite Jeremiah to come over.”

Tempting thought. He'd called to let me know he was working on the poison angle. Unfortunately, his guy inside was a lot like Tony Crapetta, scared of vampires, but willing to take their money. Blade wasn't going to hand over a dime until he was sure he would get what he paid for.

“Don't worry about me. I've got a book to finish reading. Some hand washing to do.” I grinned. “At least the thongs you make me wear don't take long to dry.”

“Have you washed the Kevlar vest yet?” Flo hadn't been impressed, even though I'd made her try it on. It had almost fit her, she's got a pretty generous bust herself, but she didn't like the way it made her look. Like Blade had said, it did tend to flatten us.

“I washed it. I don't suppose you'd consider wearing it under your clothes tonight. Westwood's out there, not to mention the religious nut.”

“No, Ricardo will protect me. And I don't think Westwood has my picture. Both times he shot near me, it was dark. Not like when he aimed at you and Derek.”

“Gee, thanks for reminding me.” A night holed up in my apartment with excellent security was sounding better and better. “Have fun. Say hi to God for me.” I headed for the shower.

I'd bathed, thrown on my bat T-shirt and jeans and had just settled down with
Shape-shifting for Dummies
(just kidding) when there was a knock on the door. Valdez jumped up and growled.

“Who is it?”

“Damian.”

“Flo's not here.”

“I don't want Florence. Can I come in? Please.”

“Why?” I looked at Valdez. He looked ready to take a hunk out of Damian if I let him in. Not that I was against the concept.

“I need to talk to you about my sister. I'll be on my best behavior. I swear on her life.”

He sounded serious. Of course I didn't trust him as far as I could throw him.

“Don't let him in.”
Valdez punctuated this with some really ferocious barking.

“Hush. Lacy's sleeping across the hall.” I got up and threw the dead bolts. “And don't attack unless I give the word.”

“What's the word?”
Valdez was showing all his teeth.

I shook my head. “Would you relax?” I pulled open the door. “And, Damian, you'd better not try anything weird.” I threw up my mental blocks anyway.

Damian smiled. “I am never weird.” He brushed against me as he came inside.

“What's this about Flo?” I sat in one of our club chairs and watched Damian try to avoid Valdez. Not easy. My dog was right on him, never more than six inches away.

“Can't you put the beast away?” Damian had a hunted look. “At least order him to back off.”

As much fun as this was to watch, I did want to talk to Damian about Flo and Richard. “Okay, Valdez. Go sit by the door. I'll let you know if I need you to take a chunk out of Mr. Wonderful here.”

I leaned back and crossed my legs. “Damian, sit. You too, Valdez.” Both beasts gave me a go to hell look. Too bad.

“Gloriana, you look wonderful tonight.” Damian settled on the love seat.

“You are so full of it.” No makeup, shapeless T-shirt and barefoot? A raving beauty I wasn't.

“What I am full of is lust for you, Gloriana.” Damian struggled to keep his charming smile going and sniffed. “What do I smell? Have you been cooking? Florence told me you want to eat.”

“I'm not eating yet. It was steak. For the dog.”

Damian sniffed again and leaned toward me. “And lavender.”

“Good nose, Sabatini.” I'd tried a new soap Lacy had brought when she'd gone to the store for Flo and me. We were low on a lot of supplies. I hated to be scared to even go to the supermarket. Maybe after Damian left I'd slap on the Kevlar and hit the all-night grocery store.

“You're still blocking me, Glory.” Damian slouched, playing the poor rejected lover. “Don't you trust me?”

“It'll be a cold day in hell before I trust you again, Damian.”

“You wound me.” He put his hand on his heart.

Too bad he was so damned good-looking. Everything Damian said and did was calculated to be completely charming. And it worked. Five o'clock shadow for the masculine touch. Silky shirt open low enough to showcase his toned body. Loafers without socks to hint at his sophistication. Well-cut trousers giving more than a hint of impressive male attributes. I doubled my block. Too much dwelling on his package was a bad sign.

“What about Flo? That's the only reason I let you in here, Damian. I'm worried about her association with Mainwaring. They're out again tonight.”

“Ricardo's fine. Not a problem,” Damian said it almost by rote.

“Great guy.”
Valdez stood and padded into the kitchen.
“Any steak left?”

“No.” Okay, this was getting weirder and weirder. “When you two agree on something, the planets are out of alignment. I'm convinced Ricardo, as you call him, has done something to both of you.”

“What could he have done?” Damian yawned, obviously unconcerned.

“Mind control, Damian. Something you're very familiar with.”

“Don't be ridiculous. No one controls my mind.” Damian stood and looked at Valdez. “The dog, sure. Anyone could make Rover roll over.” He got a crafty look and he and Valdez locked eyes. “Forget it.” He sat down again. “Why do you think Ricardo could do this, what do you call it, oh, yes, whammy on me?”

“Listen to yourself, Damian. ‘Ricardo's great. No threat.' ” I frowned. “When you went after Flo and him the other night, you were furious. Did all that anger and mistrust just melt away?”

“I got to know him. He adores my sister.”

“But he hates
me
.” I stood and walked over to sit beside Damian. “I know I'm not Miss Perfect, but I've done absolutely nothing to provoke such all out hatred.”

“Of course not, Gloriana.” Damian picked up my hand. “I'll talk to Ricardo. Explain that we must love you.” He smiled and kissed my knuckles. “He will be like a brother to you.”

I jumped up. “I don't want him for a brother!” Damian was obviously not getting it. “He may be stronger than you, Damian. Or maybe you let down your guard around him.”