Reasons I Fell for the Funny Fat Friend (10 page)

Deep breath.

“Sup?”

“Bro,” she says before grinning, “you’ve never said that before. Who’ve you been hanging out with?”

I chuckle, but don’t respond other than that. Kind of want to get this over with. Half ‘cause Hayles is waitin’ for me, and half ‘cause I’m not sure if the stomach twisting is because of Quynn or Hayles, and I don’t want to be more confused than I already am.

“I went to your house on Friday.”

I clear my throat. “Uh, yeah. My mom told me about that.”

She smiles. “Thank you for talking me into it. I can’t remember the last time I was able to enjoy a Friday night.”

Good, she’s not mad. Maybe I was reading too much into that sort-of hug she gave me last week. “No prob.” I twist the strap of my backpack around my wrist and stand. “That all you needed?”

“Oh!” Her face goes red
,
and she dumps my books off the desk with her hip. “Um, no. I wanted to talk to you about something else too.” She bends to pick up the books
,
and I’m not as big a douche as I thought ‘cause I help.

“Shoot.” Wish she’d just spit it out. Hayles is waitin’ for me.

Her face gets red again as she hands me my stuff. “Just wanted to know how things are going with your signs. Your mom said you were having trouble.”

I shrug. “Good. Hayley’s helpin’ me out. Think I’ll be okay.”

Half smile. “Oh, well… I thought… if you want…” She pauses for a second, clacking her tongue and lookin’ at the door. “I don’t mind going over signs with you after school. That is, if you don’t feel weird about that.”

Damn
it
. Opportunity I’ve been waitin’ for
,
and now I don’t want it.

“Uh, thanks. But I’ll keep tryin’ with Hayley for a bit.”

“Okay. Just let me know if you ever need my help.”

“Yup.” Gotta get outta here. Starting to get awkward. I walk toward the door, but her voice stops me again.

“Hey, Bro?”

“Yeah?”

She takes a deep breath and twirls her hair in her hand.
Damn
it, she’s got somethin’ on her mind. I’m tryin’ not to care, but it’s hard.

“Somethin’ wrong?”

Half smile—again. “Well, I have plans to stop by and see your mom on Friday again. I was kind of hoping I’d see you too for a bit. Like before, you know?”

Friday. Hayles’ birthday. If I ever get the guts to ask her out, and she says yes, I won’t be home. At least, not long enough to hang out with Quynn like we used to. There goes my freakin’ luck, choosin’ between two amazing girls.

The choice is easy though. Surprisingly easy.

“Maybe. I may have plans though.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah.”

I should say it. I should say it right now.
I’m goin’ to take Hayles out.
But I don’t. I can’t find the words. I don’t want to find the words. Not sure if Quynn would understand. Hayles is
n’t… it’s just different
.

“Okay, then. I guess I’ll see you next class.” She’s sad, and I hate it. But I can’t do anythin
’ about it. Not without screwin’
things up.

“Later.” I smile, tryin’ to seem like this isn’t the most awkward conversation I’ve had in my life.

Reason 12:
You don’t let my
jackass
jerk brother get to you

“Sorry. I just want to drop off some stuff,” I say to Hayles as we pull in my driveway. “You want to wait here?”

“Heck no!” She smiles as she unbuckles. “I want me some Coke, if you got any.”

I laugh and quickly grab the door for her. “Sure.”

She’s bouncing as we walk up the porch. It’s going to be a good afternoon, I can tell already. I don’t want to ruin it by askin’ her out, but I’m going to. Just have to find the
right
moment.

I stick the key in the door and step back to let her in first. She brushes past me and I have the sudden urge to touch the small of her back. Just to rest my hand there.
Dude
, I want any excuse to touch her at all.

She stops in the entryway and I sidle up next to her, ‘accidentally’ bumping into her back. She doesn’t move, which surprises and excites me—for about two seconds.

“Damn,
dude. Don’t mind me. Just forget
I’m even here.”

Douchebag brother.

“What the he—” Oh right, Hayles is here. “Heck are you doin’ here?”

Gabe stalks to the fridge, his ass stickin’ out of his jeans. He’s wearing boxer briefs, but still doesn’t leave much to the imagination. Hayles averts her eyes, like the re
d wall by the stairs is
the most interesting piece of artwork she’s ever seen.

“I’m outta food.”

“Go buy some
then.”

“Can’t.” He swings open the fridge and pulls up his jeans
,
which fall right back down. “Nicole don’t get paid till the thirtieth.”

“Get a job.”

He chuckles and smacks a brick of cheese, mayo, and jar of pickles on the counter. “That’s why I have Nicole. So I don’t
need
a job.”

“And here you are stealin’ food from your mom.”

I don’t give a shit he’s waitin’ on his suga momma. He needs to get the hell outta here before I lose it in front of Hayles. Just lookin’ at the prick makes me want to punch the crap out of him.

“Touché, little bro.” His idiotic laughter gets muffled as he sticks his head in the cupboard.

“Um,” Hayles whispers in my ear. “Bathroom?”

Yeah, I don’t blame her. “Down the hall, second door on the right.”

“Thanks.”

She’s gone
,
an
d I’m storming into the kitchen. I fight
Gabe as he takes things out
,
and I put them back.

“Dude, chill!”

“You need to get
out!”

“Geez, who pissed in your lunch?” He grabs a grocery bag from under the sink and starts shoving as much food as he ca
n into it. “I told you to forget
I was here.”

“You can’t just pop in
after ten months of nothin’ but
bein’ a complete dick to Mom and Dad. Then there’s Quynn—”

“Oh, I get it.” He pulls up his jeans, which again d
oes no good. “You still into my e
x?”

I gulp. “What
are ya talkin’ about?”

“You know what I’m talkin’ about. I don’t blame you, kid. She’s damn sexy. Piece o’ work, but she was good in the sack. I say have a go at her if you can. But don’t be pissed at me for movin’ on to richer fish.”

Can’t take this anymore. I slam him against the fridge, holdin’ him by his stupid-ass Korn shirt. “You
better shut your
mouth before I do it for you.”

He chuckles
,
and I tighten my grip.

“It’s not funny, dickwad.”

“All right, all right.” He shakes from my hold, and I reluctantly let go. If it wasn’t for Hayles in the next room, I’d beat the crap out of him.

He digs through more cupboards and I let him. I just want him out of here.

“Bingo.” He pulls out Dad’s six pack of Corona. I know I’m going to get an earful from Dad, but I don’t care.

“Look little bro,” Gabe says, gettin’ all his ‘hard-earned’ food together, “learn from my damn shit and don’t get attached too young just ‘cause your girlfriend’s got one hell of an ass. Bang any chick who’ll give you whatever you want without naggin’ your balls off. And mooch off your parents when they aren’t home. Trust me, this shit’s a lot easier than workin’ your ass off for minimum wage.”

He opens a beer and slides it across the bar to me, then opens one for himself. “Oh, and stop bein’ so damn pissed all the time.”

He slugs me in the arm as he passes me, beer in one hand, bag of half the food from our fridge in the other.

I’m not sure how he became such a dick. But if it’s genetic, I hope it bypassed me.

“Get out.” I don’t touch the beer, though I kind of want to once he leaves.

He stops at the door to give me one of those stupid cocky smirks. “Have fun with your girl. Didn’t peg you as a chubby chaser, but whatever gets you action. Might help with your attitude.”

If I was faster, he’d have a broken face. But he’s gone before I can get to the door.

“Well,” Hayles says from the hallway. Oh
crap
, please tell me she didn’t hear that. “He’s a real charmer.” She smiles, but her eyes are filled to the brim with tears.

Crap. Crap. Crap
.

“Hey,” I say
,
closing the distance between us. I don’t care how awkward this may be or that s
he hates it when I touch her. “D
on’t listen to him, all right? He’s a jacka… he’s just a jerk.”

She nods, attempts another smile and shrugs. “No biggie. I stopped listening after the nagging balls comment.”

She’s lyin’, but how do I make her feel better without makin’ this worse? I go to wrap her in a hug, but she coughs and takes a step back.

“Do you mind if I use your phone?” she asks. “I wanna check and see if mine is ready yet.”

“Sure.” I tug my phone outta my pocket and slide it into her open palm, ignoring how moronic I feel for tryin’ to comfort her and failing.

“Thanks dawg. I’ll just be a sec.” Another fake smile.

I nod as she presses the phone to her ear and turns around. Better give her privacy, even though I want to wrap her in my arms and apologize over and over for my dick of a brother. Stalking to the kitchen, I grab my backpack I dropped by the door and start puttin’ away the mess Gabe made. Dad’s going to kill me fo
r lettin’ him take his favorite
beer, but nothin’ I can do about it now.

After putting the bread loaf douchebag brother took half of away, I glance at the clock on the microwave.

Where is Mom? She’s usually home by now. Actually, she should’ve been home an hour ago.

Maybe she saw Gabe and took off runnin’ while she could. Mom is one smart lady.

A long sigh escapes Hayles mouth as she walks in the kitchen.

“Favor?”

“Sure. What’s up?”

She slides my phone across the bar. “My phone’s all fixed. Mind taking me to
Verizon
to pick it up?”

I smirk. “Only if you tell me how it got waterlogged in the first place.”

A giggle and an eye roll is the only answer I get.

“All right.” Stubborn girl. “Let me leave a note for my ma.”

I jot down real quick where I’ll be—with her car—and also why there’s an open beer on the counter.

“You really don’t mind, do you?” she asks as I lock the house up, an unopened can of Coke in her hand.

“Hayles, it’s fine.” I’m probably more psyched than she is about gettin’ her phone back.

“You are freaking
wonderistic, Brody. Why the heck did I not befriend you before now?”
She laughs and nudges me with her elbow. My stomach knots up and all the pissed off crap I had from the brief conversation with Gabe just disappears.

She turns, but I grab her hand and whirl her toward me.

Do
not
bail out this time, Brody.

“Hey, uh…” Brain dead. Going brain dead. Just get it out. “W-what are ya doin’… I mean…”
Ugh
. Find the words, dude! “I was wondering if, uh, you had any plans yet for your birthday.”

Her eyes widen
,
and she shakes loose from my hold. “Nothing yet.
Why?” Her face is pink. It’s so
cute like that.

“Can I…” Do it fast, Brody. Like a band-aid. “Can I take you out?”

It’s out there now. I’m pretty sure it’s obvious I’m askin’ her on a date for real this time. I’m tryin’ to read her expression but it
’s hard. What
is she thinking? At first her mouth pops open
,
and her eyes light up like I told her she won the lottery—not sayin’ I’m the lottery, but you get what I mean. Next second her green eyes
brim over with those tears, and
I’m not sure what to think.

So I stand here.

Like an idiot.

Waiting…

Waiting…

Stomach twisting.

Ready to hurl all over the porch.

Still waiting.

How long has it been? Feels like hours.

“A-are you serious?”

Whew. I haven’t lost my hearing. “Yeah. I want to take you out.”

“Like on a date?” Her voice pitches on the word.

“Uh, yeah.”

Again, I can’t read her expression. But it sort-of looks like she thinks I’m makin’ some kind of joke.

“Knock it off, Brody.”

Ugh. “I’m serious, Hayles.”

Her forehead crinkles, right there between her eyebrows. Does she have any idea how crazy that drives me?

“What? Why?”

Okay, here we go. Can’t tell her just
how
much
I’m obsessing over her. She’d bolt from the porch
,
and I’d never see her again. But I can’t be too ‘whatever’ about it either, ‘cause she’d never believe me.

I clear my throat. “You deserve to be taken out for your birthday. And… and I want to be the guy who takes you on your first date.”

She crosses her arms, makin’ that cleavage pop. I’m goin’ to have to keep my eyes on her face in order to form coherent sentences. “Are you for real?”

“Uh, yeah.” Dude, I’m so bad at this. She’s going to say no.

Her eyes get watery for the shortest second in the world, but enough for me to worry over it, then… then she’s
smiling
. “So, like, what do I wear on a date?” She giggles and hops down the porch. “I’ve never been on one, remember?”

Just like that, we’re back to normalcy. Well, as normal as it ever is between us.

“Something comfortable.”

“PJ’s?” she jokes.

I laugh and open the door for her
,
and she plops in. “If you want.” Then the images of her in them make me lose concentration for a second.

“Be careful. I’d live in my pajamas if I could.”

As I shut the door and cross to my side, I see her feet slide up on the dash
,
and she taps her knees to a song I’m sure is just in her head. It’s like our thing now. Feels like we’ve been dating for a week already.

Why was I so nervous?

“I take it you’re saying yes then?” I ask as I start the engine. I know it’s stupid, but I want to hear her say it.

“Yeah… but…”

Oh, h
ere it comes.

“It’s not like it’s a
real
date or anything. I’m agreeing ‘cause you’re that awesome of a friend, but we both know sooner or later, you’ll be going out with
the
girl. Not just one of your homies.”

Grr…
this girl!

“It
is
a real date. I want to pick you up and—”

“Can we meet somewhere instead?”

Girl is way weird about her house. Dude, she’s weird in general and I’m about to throw in the towel, but I give her a once over
,
and I can’t. She’s worth all the trouble.

“I don’t want to ruin the surprise.” I wink and toss my arm around the back of her headrest. I’m layin’ it on thick, I know, but she’s gotta catch on to the flirting eventually.

“Oh gosh, now I’m nervous!” She laughs and pops open her drink.

“It’ll be fun, I promise.” I smirk at her before putting the car in drive. “And I’m pickin’ you up. No arguing with me.”

She rolls her eyes as she takes a sip of her Coke. “Okay, but like, text me when you’re on your way. Deal?”

I can live with that. “Deal.” I wrap my hand around hers, and she lets me.