Reasons to Leave (Reasons #1) (15 page)

Jason’s fingers came around to the front of her linen trousers, and after unfastening them, he dropped to his knees before her and grasped them, tugging away the last remaining barriers as quickly as he could. He gazed up to look at her standing naked before him and shook his head slowly.

“What? What is it?” She was suddenly very self-conscious and wanted to cover her curves up again.

“Just…
look
at you…you have to be one of the most beautiful sights I’ve ever been lucky enough to behold.”

Her cheeks flushed, and she clenched her hands at her sides. “Oh stop…I’m ten years older than when you
should’ve
seen me like this.
Then
I would’ve been worth looking at, but now—”

“No. Don’t do that. Don’t take
anything
away from this moment.
Please
. To me…looking at you now…like this… You’re perfection. Just as you are.” He grasped her hips and rested his forehead on her belly. “I had no idea I’d missed you this much. I had no idea how incomplete I was without you.
Please
forgive me.” His words choked as they left his mouth.

Overcome with emotion, more tears escaped and slipped down her face, leaving cold, wet trails in their wake. “I do forgive you, Jason. But really…there’s nothing to forgive. What you did…yes, it hurt…but now that I know why you left, how could I be angry?” She stroked his hair, and his tears dampened her skin as he clung to her.

Once he had calmed, he began to trail kisses all over her from where he crouched. His fingers dug into her hips, and he nuzzled the soft curls at the apex of her thighs and inhaled deeply.

“God, I love your smell.” Horrified at his words, she tried to step back, but his eyes shot up to meet hers. “I mean it. Don’t be embarrassed.” He turned back and nuzzled her again. She began to relax until his tongue slipped between her folds. Her head rolled back, and she couldn’t help the groan that released from her throat. “Mmmm…and you taste amazing too.” He lapped at her until she began to tighten. Her breathing became shallow. Miles had never been able to make her come this way. It had
never
felt this good. It was as if Jason had known the best way to mark her. To ruin her for every other man. She clenched and tugged at his hair as her legs began to weaken.

“Jason…Jason stop,” she whispered desperately.

“It’s okay, Stevie…just let go…I’ve got you.” His voice vibrated deep inside her and pushed her over the edge. She cried out as her legs gave way beneath her and pleasure pulsed from her core all the way to her fingertips and curled toes. He grabbed her body and pulled her against him as he stood.

Once on his feet again, he took her mouth with such fervour that he stole her breath. Their tongues tangled and caressed each other in a passionate duel as their touches gained urgency. Taking what they had lost ten years before.

As he kissed her, Jason backed them toward the bed and tumbled, taking her with him. She was pulled on top of his hard body as he squeezed and moulded her breast with one hand, the other tugging at her hair. His breathing was heavy and fevered, mirroring hers. She broke away from his mouth and nibbled along his jaw, down his neck, making him groan with desire as his hand slipped around to pull her into him. It was as if he couldn’t quite get her close enough. She scratched at his chest and back feeling the same urgency making his erection flinch against her, refuelling her need for him.

Suddenly, he moved her so that she was beneath him. He had one leg between her thighs as he trailed kisses down her chest and along to her breast where he drew a nipple between his teeth, swirling his tongue around the peak, making her moan and grasp at his hair to pull him even closer. Heat enflamed her body as her muscles clenched once again. She needed his touch elsewhere. His hand stroked roughly down her body until he found her dampness and began to tease her with his fingers.

As his touch picked up speed, Jason closed his eyes. “Oh God, I want you so, so much. Please, say yes.”

She reached up and caressed his face until he once again met her gaze. “I think you already know that my answer is yes.”

Caressing her sensitive flesh again, he made her cry out. He teased her tender nub once more until pleasure shot through her body and she bucked beneath him, her breathing becoming faster. “Oh, Jason…Jason
please
,” she cried as she soared skyward once again.

“You look so beautiful when you just let yourself go like that. I love to see you.” Jason caught her cries with his mouth as she clung to him whilst she floated back down to earth. As her breathing calmed, the bed moved. She opened her eyes and looked up to see Jason sheathing himself. He really was staggeringly beautiful. His broad chest glistened with sweat in the dim light, and his bicep muscles flexed and tensed as he moved. Jason naked was certainly one mental picture she wanted to etch into her mind and keep forever.

He leaned back over her again and kissed her deeply, exploring her mouth once again with his delicious tongue and rebuilding her desire for him. “When I said that seeing you naked before me was the most beautiful sight I’d ever beheld…I was wrong…it was seeing you fall apart in ecstasy like that, in
my
arms. And knowing that
I
made it happen is just… Wow! Words just…fail me.”

She couldn’t find the words to respond either at that point. She simply gazed up at him as her breathing calmed, unable to believe how amazing she felt. How connected to him she felt.

He positioned himself between her thighs and hesitated. “Are you sure you’re real? Am I going to wake up from a dream the moment I sink myself inside of you?”

She slowly moved her head from side to side. “I’m here. This is real.” She hadn’t been with a man in a long while and was a little nervous, but she had never wanted to be with any man as much as she wanted Jason.

He thrust himself inside her as a loud groan erupted from deep within his chest. “Stevie…
my
soul mate
.” Tears escaped her eyes at the words she had loved so much before he left. Once he was fully immersed in her, he stopped and nuzzled her neck. He lifted so that he rested above her on his forearms and looked into her eyes. “
My
soul mate.” He whispered possessively as he ran his nose along hers, before kissing her with all the passion and longing ten years apart had built.

She threaded one hand in his hair and slid the other down to his bottom where she kneaded and squeezed, encouraging him to move. It was all the motivation he needed. Picking up his pace, he crashed his mouth into hers once again, urgency and hunger so clearly evident in his heated movements, holding her as his eyes remained locked on hers. She lifted her legs and wrapped them around his waist, inhaling sharply at their deeper connection. She clung to him, never wanting to let him go.

The feeling of him moving inside her was exquisite, like
nothing
she had experienced before. She had always loved sex, but nothing came close to making love with Jason. Because even though there was desperation in his movements, she felt sure that’s what this was; making love. She too had fantasised about this moment. And now that it was happening, it was all she had hoped for, and more.

Resting his forehead on hers, he gained momentum, and she tightened again. Soon she was gasping, with her head thrown back and her eyes closed.

“Stevie…look at me…
please
…I want to see you. I need to know this is real.” Jason’s pain-filled words pulled her back from the edge. Her eyes snapped open and met the intensity of his. His brow creased and his expression was a mask of myriad emotions. He thrust forward once more, and she shattered into a million microscopic pieces beneath him.

A split second later a guttural roar erupted from his chest as he joined her. “Stevie!” Her name was a drawn-out sounding cry falling from his lips. “
My soul mate
,” he whispered once again.

Chapter Ten

Jason glanced over at the clock. It was almost two in the morning. Stevie was curled into his side with her head resting on his chest. Her breathing told him that she was asleep, yet he continued to stroke his fingers up and down her back, feeling soothed by his own actions.

Making love to her had blown his mind. He’d had plenty of
sex
in his adult life since he left her, but he had
never
connected with anyone like that before. This was
way
beyond sex. He’d felt it deep in his soul. The pleasure intensified a hundred fold just because he actually
cared
. He’d never been a selfish lover, but his partner’s gratification was always a means to a selfish end. This, however, had been all about
her
, watching her overwhelmed with pleasure. The fact that he experienced the most astounding orgasm of his life was just a bonus. The way she’d looked when she came… Wow…just
beautiful
. He wanted to experience that over and over again, to hold her and feel her clench as she fell apart just for him.

All
for him.

This wasn’t how he had intended things to go tonight. He wanted to talk, to find out about her life since he’d been absent. But hearing her talk about sex with another man had sparked possessiveness in him that he had no idea existed. He had
never
felt that way before, but at that moment, hearing her talking about how Miles had made her come every time hurt him so deeply that he suddenly needed her to experience with
him
what he had wanted her to experience all those years ago. He needed to show her how things could be with him.

Seeing her naked had stunned him. Back when they were eighteen they had never gone beyond kissing and holding each other. He had no idea what had lain beneath her clothes, although he was a teenaged guy with a libido like any other teenaged guy. But he had never even touched her breast for fear things would get heated and they’d end up going further. This would have revealed his secret pain to her, and he hadn’t wanted that.

But now she was a woman in
every
sense of the word. Her smooth skin and her curves took his breath away. She had been self-conscious, but he had no clue why. She was in no way skinny, but that was such a
good
thing. Women these days were obsessed with being thin. But from experience, he knew there was nothing remotely sexy about fucking a skeleton with skin. Women like that didn’t give him a raging hard on like the one he’d had since the day she had re-entered his life. Women were supposed to be soft and curvy to complement the flat, hard planes of a man. Well, of
him
anyway.

Her luscious, auburn hair was still long, something he had always loved about her. And her azure blue eyes still had a sparkle, albeit a little duller than before—he blamed himself for that.

Her nakedness and vulnerability had suddenly floored him. As he knelt before her and looked up at her earlier, every single feeling he once had for her came flooding back to him. His heart ached and his breath hitched as myriad emotions vied for the surface at once. He’d never cried in front of a woman before, that’s for certain. But kneeling there before her, he had been racked with sadness and a kind of grief for the lost years. Years he
should
have been worshipping her but instead he’d been fighting for his country, acting as security abroad, or running an Outward Bounds centre for teens. He couldn’t regret the things he had done during their time spent apart, but he
could
regret the fact that they
were
apart.

She stirred beside him, and he reached down and kissed her head. Her eyes fluttered open and she stretched, brushing her breasts again him. His manhood began to waken, and feeling rather ashamed of the automatic reaction of his body to hers, he pulled the sheet over himself.

She ran her hand over his chest. “Hmmm…what time is it?”

“Just after two.”

She sat bolt upright, fully exposing her breasts in the process. “Oh shit! I need to go.”

He smiled as he reached up to stroke a finger down the curve that he had been worshipping only an hour or so before.

She slapped his hand away. “Hey, hands off ma goods, Reynolds.”

“Awww…but they’re so touchable.”

She fell silent and picked invisible lint from the sheet. He could tell she was feeling awkward, so he tenderly stroked her cheek. “Hey, what’s wrong?”

“I’m…I’m just not sure that this was a good idea. I mean…what happens now? I think we both need to get real here and realise that—”

“Hey, hey… Will you just stop analysing,
please
?” He pulled himself upright to face her. His heart had begun to pound in his chest.