Red Hot Rose Boxed Set (20 page)

Jessica’s face popped up in the water right next to mine.
 
“I will take your secrets to the grave with me, roomie.”
 
She kissed me on the cheek quickly before going back to floating right next to me.
 
She held onto my hand, refusing to let me get too far away.
 
“Come on.
 
Talk to me,” she said in a too-loud voice, the water filling her ears and making it impossible for her to judge the proper volume.
 
“Pretend I’m your priest and you’ve come to confess.
 
I’ll start it for you.
 
A-hem.
 
Father, hear my sins.
 
Last night I gave my date a blow job in the front seat of his car.”

I couldn’t help but laugh, lifting my head out of the water so I wouldn’t talk too loudly.
 
“That is so sacrilegious, what you’re doing right now.”
 
I looked around but the few other occupants of the pool area weren’t paying any attention to us.
 
I relaxed a little, thinking my love life was probably not exciting enough for anyone but me to care about it.

“No, it’s not sacrilegious.
 
I’m helping you.
 
I’m like Sister Mary Jessica over here, trying to help you get your dirty thoughts off your mind.
 
Come on, try it.
 
You’ll feel better once you’ve confessed.”

I sat up completely, clearing the water out of my ears and deciding I might as well play along.
 
I knew Jessica well enough to know she wasn’t going to give up until I told her something.
 
The question was, how much should I tell her?
 
“Sister Mary Jessica, I did so many bad things last night, I don’t even know where to start.”

She sat up at my tone and frowned.
 
Reaching out she patted me on the shoulder.
 
“Whatever you’re thinking right now,
stop
.
 
I’m sure you did everything right.
 
Tell me what it was, and I’ll be the judge.”

I had to smile.
 
“You’re judging me now?”

“Yes.
 
Thumbs up or thumbs down.
 
It’s a simple rating system.
 
Did you, or did you not, give him a BJ?”

I shook my head.

She gave me a thumbs down.

“Thumbs down?
 
Why thumbs down?”

“BJs give women power over men, dummy.
 
You passed on a power play.
 
Easy thumbs-down call.
 
Let’s try again.
 
Did you give him a hand job?”

“Uhhh, no … but I touched it.”

Jessica smiled.
 
“Progress!”
 
Then she frowned.
 
“But sorry, thumbs down.
 
You have to do more than touch it.
 
Let’s move on.
 
Maybe I should start with something simple.
 
Did you kiss him and involve your tongue in the process?”

“Yes.
 
And I also let him do me in the butt, so go ahead and judge that while you’re at it.”

“WHHHAAAAAAAAT?!” screamed Jessica, leaping out of the water and grabbing me by the shoulders.
 
She shook me until I could no longer control my head and keep it from flopping back and forth with the force.

I gripped her back, yelling, “Stop!” while also laughing.

She was beside herself.
 
“You did it in the … oh my god, oh my
god
, double, triple, quadruple thumbs
up
, roomie!
 
A whole church full of thumbs up on that one!”
 
She pulled me into a huge hug, squeezing me until I could barely breathe anymore.

“I’m glad you approve.
 
No wait … I’m sad you approve,” I said, over her shoulder.
 
I wasn’t sure what it said about either one of us.
 
Probably that we needed therapy or something.

She pushed me away so we were face to face.
 
“Never ever be sad that I approve of your anal sex.”

I grimaced.
 
“Could we please, for the love of all that is holy,
not
call it that?”

“Okay,” she said, looking very determined, her eyes not leaving mine for a second.
 
“We’ll call it … back door love.”

I nodded weakly.
 
“I can live with that.
 
Kind of.”

She pulled me into another hug-fest.
 
“You totally popped your back door cherry.
 
I’m so
jealous
of you!”

“Jealous?” I asked, not believing my ears.
 
“Of me?”

She faced me again.
 
“Of course!
 
I’ve always wondered what that’s like.”

“You could have had … back door love a hundred times by now.
 
I can’t believe you haven’t.”
 
I looked at her suspiciously.
 
“You’re just messing with me.”

She shook her head.
 
“Nope.
 
I’ve never done it.
 
I’ve never been with the right guy.”

“How do you know?” I asked, feeling more vulnerable than I would have liked.
 
“Whether someone’s the right guy or not?”

“You tell me,” she said, putting her hands gently on my cheeks, squeezing them a couple times.
 
“I know you, Rosie.
 
You would never do that with just any guy.
 
Alex Blackstone must be someone special for you to have lowered your guard that much.”

I nodded, tears coming to my eyes, my mouth twitching with barely-held-back emotions.
 
He
was
special, but that didn’t matter.
 
It didn’t make it possible for us to have a real relationship, no matter how much I might want to dream about it.

“Awww, sweetie, come here,” she said, hugging me tenderly.
 
“It’s going to be fine.
 
I promise.
 
He obviously cares a lot about you.
 
He set this whole thing up last night.
 
He could have just done what other guys do - call you later or not call at all.”

I nodded again. “I know.
 
He’s very considerate.”

She pulled back to look at me.
 
“He’s more than considerate, obviously.
 
So what happened?
 
Can you tell me?
 
Because I really, really want to know.
 
And I swear on your grave I won’t tell a soul.”

I shrugged, wiping my face with some of the salt-water, ignoring the fact that she’d just given me a totally bogus swear of secrecy.
 
“He took me to dinner, we had sex in the bathroom, and then I guess I passed out in his car.”

“Wait, wait, wait …”
 
She put her hand up.
 
“Hold the phone.
 
You had
back door love
in the restaurant
bathroom
?
 
Whoa, Rosie, that’s taking it to a whole other level I hadn’t even considered.”
 
She shook her head in either shock or awe, I wasn’t sure which.

I laughed.
 
“No, goof, I didn’t do that.
 
I had regular, standing-up sex in the bathroom.
 
It was when he brought me to his house, after we woke up this morning, that we did the other stuff.”

She shook her head, now definitely in awe.
 
“I bow down to you, oh sex goddess of the United States of Awesome.
 
I am not worthy.”
 
She moved her arms up and down in a gesture of worship.

I slapped them away.
 
“Shut up.
 
I’m no sex goddess.
 
I’m the president of the United States of Idiot, and I ran totally unopposed for the office with a one-hundred-percent approval rating.
 
Seriously.
 
This is going nowhere fast, and I totally blew my chance at my dream job.”

“Why do you think that?” asked Jessica, genuinely confused.

Her stupid question immediately put me on edge.
 
“Do you really have to ask that?” I nearly shrieked at her, slapping the water next to me.
 
In a lower voice, I continued with, “I had back door love with the boss, in his house, after blacking out, and
after
having sex with him in the bathroom during a dinner meeting!
 
I am the biggest hooker-ho he’s probably ever seen in his entire life!”

She nodded sagely.
 
“You’re right.
 
No wonder he likes you so much.
 
I admire your style.
 
I’m going to try some of your moves on my next date.”

I slapped her lightly, shoving myself away with my feet against the side of the pool.
 
“I can’t talk to you anymore.
 
You’re ridiculous.”

She followed next to me, meeting each of my backstrokes with a breast stroke of her own.
 
“I got a text that says otherwise.”

I stopped immediately and treaded water.
 
“What text?”

“The one he sent me on the way here.”

I quit trying to get away and grabbed her arm.
 
“What’d it say?”

She smiled.
 
“Wouldn’t you like to know?”
 
She paddled backwards fast, too fast for me to catch her.
 
She kicked up a lot of water and foam into my face when I tried to pursue her, so I gave up, getting out of the pool and drying off.
 
I knew she wouldn’t be able to stay away from me.
 
She couldn’t keep a secret like that to save her life.

She eventually joined me, smiling like a cheshire cat and obviously very pleased with herself.

“You’re evil, you know that?” I asked.

“Play your cards right, and I’ll tell you everything I know.”

“I’ve already told you all my shame.
 
What other cards do I have?”

“I know, it’s true.
 
Don’t worry, though.
 
I have only one more requirement for you today, and if you follow it, I’ll spill.”

“Okay, what is it?”

“The requirement is that you
relax
.
 
Seriously, you’re giving me stress wrinkles.
 
Just chill and enjoy this day with me.
 
You’re going to have a very busy week with your new job, and you need to clear your head beforehand.”

“I am?” I asked weakly.

She nodded confidently.
 
“Yes.
 
You are.”
 
She winked once before leaving me to go grab her robe.
 
“Follow me, little gipper.
 
It’s time for our massages.”

I put on my robe and went with her dutifully out of the pool area, determined to follow her relaxation advice for no other reason than I had no better idea about what I should be doing now, and I knew obsessing over Alexander was just a really bad idea.

We walked out of the spa several hours later feeling like wet noodles.

“I’m glad you’re driving.
 
I can barely lift my arms,” I said, strapping myself slowly into my seat.

“I need a chauffeur.
 
Maybe you can call Alex and order us one.”
 
Jessica leaned her head back against her headrest, her eyes closed.
 
She fake-snored for a few seconds before lifting her head again.

“I followed your orders, but you never told me what his text said,” I reminded her.

She handed me her phone from her lap. “Here.
 
Read it yourself.”
 
She fiddled with her gear shift and disengaged the emergency brake.

I looked at the screen, pressing buttons until I got to the right one and could read the message:
 
Rose had a long night.
 
Can you be sure she gets taken care of today?
 
I’ll owe you one.
 
Arrangements in place at Blissful Days Salon.
 
You’re all set.

I checked the timestamp on the message.
 
It had come through after I’d left his house, at nine-forty-two.

“This doesn’t mean anything,” I said, knowing I was just being contrary.
 
“He could have just felt bad about what happened.”

Jessica snatched her phone out of my hand.
 
“Bullcrap.
 
He couldn’t possibly have felt bad about getting all that booty love from you.
 
No man could.
 
He’s in love.”

My heart skipped a beat.
 
“In love?
 
No way.
 
No way in hell.
 
Guys like him don’t do love.”