Redeeming Justice (35 page)

Storming from the room in a blind rage, Alex made like a man possessed for the front
door, flinging it wide and stepping into the early morning light with a dark savagery
etched on every inch of his body. He wanted to fucking kill someone. Wanted to strike
out at the entire world for everything he’d lost and all the damage he’d done.

Jumping into his truck, he started the engine and peeled out of the driveway in a
cloud of dust, roaring down the drive as if the hounds of hell were chasing him.

Meghan stretched slowly, still cocooned in the warmth of Alex’s big bed. His scent
wrapped around her like a blanket. Memories of the night flashed in her mind. A small
smile curled her lips as she remembered how he’d taken her with a ferocity that had
been a total turn on. She’d responded to him in such a primal way. Thinking about
it made her shudder with pleasure. He was a magnificent beast.
Her
magnificent beast.

Reaching for him, she was surprised to find herself alone in the bed. Thinking he
was in the bathroom or maybe getting dressed, Meghan lay there and luxuriated in the
aftermath of their lovemaking. Could anything be sweeter than replaying such a bawdy
encounter? She didn’t think so. He’d been masterful and demanding. Playing her emotions
the entire day until she’d been ripe and ready for whatever he threw at her.

Smiling, she remembered the sexy boudoir cuffs and the way she’d crawled with hands
restrained onto the bed and raised her naked backside in the air for him to use as
he pleased. He had turned her into a wanton and try as she might to feel weird about
that fact, she couldn’t. She’d been with him every step of the way, even crying out
for more when he fucked her aggressively.

Sitting up, she pushed the messy tangle of her hair away from her face and looked
around. As far as could be told, Alex was nowhere in the vicinity. She wondered where
he’d wandered off. It was still early. Early enough that she doubted anyone from the
agency had need of him.

Hmmm. What was going on,
she wondered.

Twenty minutes later, freshly showered and dressed, Meghan tiptoed into the kitchen
thinking to surprise him at coffee but the house was silent and empty. Maybe the tech
cave?

Making her way down a series of corridors, she pushed open the large doors to the
cave and went in search of him. With no lights on except the ones that flickered from
the tons of electrical equipment spread around the space, she was baffled by his absence.

And then she saw it. His corner of tech-heaven had been reduced to rubble. The only
thing that hadn’t been slammed into the wall or sent crashing to the floor was the
desk itself. Everything else was in pieces. What the hell had happened?

Sprinting back to the bedroom like a fire was chasing her down, Meghan quickly found
her phone and called Alex’s cell. When it went straight to voicemail without ringing,
she knew he wasn’t communicating. On reflex, she connected next with Tori’s cell phone.
Something was definitely not right. With panic spreading through her body, she hoped
Alex’s assistant would have some answers.

“Meghan. Good lord Irish. Do you know what time it is?” grumbled the groggy, half-asleep
voice that answered.

“Tori. Is Alex with you?” she blurted out.

She could almost feel Tori shaking her head to clear the cobwebs of sleep from her
mind. “Um. No. Draegyn’s in the shower though, but I haven’t seen or heard from Alex.
Why? What’s wrong?”

Meghan didn’t quite know how to answer that question.

“Can you come up here? To the house, I mean. Something’s wrong.”

“With Alex? What do you mean Irish?”

“Look,” Meghan said jerkily. “Just get here as soon as you can. Okay?”

“Okay, okay. We’ll be there in a few.”

Meghan heard Tori calling out to her husband as she hit the end button to terminate
the call.

Dammit.
She was beside herself. Something was terribly wrong. She could feel it. When the
St. John’s arrived a half hour later, Meghan was pacing back and forth by the front
door, wringing her hands and trying not to entertain every horrible scenario that
popped into her head.

The expression on Draegyn’s face told her he wasn’t exactly surprised that something
was going on. In fact, he had a somber, almost dour look that felt like a foreboding.
Meghan swallowed the huge lump forming in her throat as he came toward her.

“What’s up?” he asked tightly with Tori following close on his heels.

Unable to form words, she just pointed toward the tech room and waved them on. Scurrying
quickly, the minute Drae saw the carnage he loosed a terse, “Fuck,” and turned quickly
toward his wife.

“C’mon computer wizard,” he murmured. “That laptop looks like toast but I know you
can access whatever he was looking at. Get me a screenshot of his computer, babe.”

Meghan saw Tori hesitate and bite her lip as she shot her husband an anxious frown.
Drae quickly told her, “And no, I don’t give a fuck and neither should you that he’ll
be pissed you hacked into his personal shit. Screw that. The goddamn NSA is probably
watching everything he does anyway.”

It took Tori less than two minutes to do as her husband asked. The minute the date
flashed on the screen with the damning document list—nothing but names and a couple
of jpegs—he was swearing like it was his job. Without hesitating he pulled his phone
from a pocket and tapped on the screen. She heard the sound of ringing and realized
he had it on speakerphone.
Oh thank God
, Meghan hoped silently. Maybe he knew how to get in touch with Alex.

A pissed off growling voice answered, but not Alex’s.

“Suck my dick St. John. Why the fuck are you calling at this hour?”

Drae winced but answered quickly. “Alex is off the reservation Cam. Check the date
and then get your ass up here. Fast. This doesn’t look good.”

She heard Cam mutter, “Fuck,” followed by silence. A minute went by during which he
must have checked the date and time, then he said, “Got it.
RTB.
I’ll be right there.” And the phone went dead.

Meghan’s anxiety got the better of her. “What’s going on Drae? RTB? What does that
mean? Why did you say Alex was off the reservation?” The questions came fast and furious.
Tears clogged her throat when Tori put an arm around her waist. “Please tell me what’s
happening.”

Drae looked at her for a hard minute, his ice blue eyes, cold and assessing. He was
frightening her but good. A cold shiver swirled in her senses making Meghan start
to tremble uncontrollably.

Tori finally spoke up. “Draegyn,” was all she said but she did it in that tone wives
use when they want their husbands to pay attention. He sucked in a huge breath of
air and seemed to pull himself together.

“RTB means return to base. It’s an expression from our military days. Cam will be
here in record time.” He looked around again at the mess in the office and frowned.
“Alex off the reservation just means he’s not here. Something definitely happened
when he came down here and saw what day it is.”

Turning to his wife he asked, “Did he search for that list or was it…?”

Before he got any further with the question Tori chimed in. “He had it scheduled for
the welcome screen when he logged in today.”

“Motherfucker,” he mumbled. “Why does he do this to himself?” he asked out loud, pacing
restlessly, his eyes intense and hard.

Meghan had enough. She didn’t know what anyone was talking about. Her nerves snapped
and she cried out, “What the fuck is going on?”

Draegyn and Tori looked at her stunned. Drae groaned and shook his head.

“Sorry Meghan. I can see this is freaking you out so I should warn you that it’s probably
going to get a lot worse before it gets any better.”

“Is Alex alright?” she asked in a thready voice overcome with anxiety. “What can I
do?”

Drae waved his hand at the broken equipment and grimaced. “It’s the anniversary of
the bombing. The list on his computer was the names of everyone who died.”

Her “Oh,” formed on her face but she wasn’t sure if the word actually came out of
her mouth. The anniversary.
Shit.
David died on this day all those years ago. Cold fear started making its way into
her nervous system. This was the thing that lived in the shadows of Alex’s conscience
where dark thoughts and terrible memories constantly threatened to steal his soul.

“Is he okay Drae? Please tell me.”

Draegyn moved to her side and wrapped her in a hug. Tori came in from behind and wrapped
her arms around Meghan’s waist enveloping her in an affectionate emotional sandwich.

Drae assured her, “He’s going to be fine honey. Don’t you worry. Cam and I know what
to do.”

Turning to his wife he said, “You ladies should hang out together. Lacey can’t really
be running around, and it’d be best if you just let us handle things from here. Okay?”

What was Meghan supposed to do? She was scared and confused but not a stranger to
the dynamic behind what was happening right before her eyes. Her father was a cop;
two of her brothers were firemen and the other an EMT. She knew all too well about
guilt and survivor’s remorse and the shit storm those emotions could cause. It killed
her to think of Alex going through that.

Last night was fading into memory, and being replaced with things that were scaring
the shit out of her. There was nothing to do but wait and see what happened next.

Meghan was numb and panicked when she let Tori bundle her into an electric cart for
the drive to Lacey’s cabin. They passed Cam along the way as he sped by without a
wave. It was all Meghan could do not to turn around and return to the house. She didn’t
know what help she’d be but she wanted to be in on whatever Cam and Drae were going
to do.

Tori reached out a squeezed her hand reassuringly. “Let the men handle this one, Irish.
I told you how complicated these Justice brothers are. I don’t have enough knowledge
to offer an opinion, and I doubt Lacey does either about whatever this is, but I bet
they’ve been down the road before.”

Meghan nodded but turned and watched as Cam’s truck disappeared around a bend in the
lane. She felt helpless. And even worse, she hadn’t ever spoken of her feelings to
Alex—telling him how she felt might have helped. Them not talking about what they
were doing or looking at the future had been a critical mistake. She loved him. Like
crazy, bat-shit, all encompassing, tie me to the bed and have your way with me, love.
And he needed to know that.

Lacey was on the front porch when they arrived at the cabin. She looked like they
all felt. Worried. Confused. It was going to be one hell of a day.

Hours later Drae and Cam were still working the angles and coming up empty.

“Still no answer?” Cam asked

Drae shook his head in the negative and disconnected the phone call. They just looked
at each other but said nothing for a long time.