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Authors: S. Moose

BOOK: Refresh
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“Mason, you could have said you love me,” I laugh and wipe more tears. “I wish I could hear you say it. Just once. Just once,” I mutter and close my eyes so I can go back to the place I love. It’s the place where I’m with Mason and there’s no one out to hurt us or cause harm. It’s just us.

Us.

Us.

Us.

It’s been almost four weeks and I can still feel his touch.

His touch.

His love.

His touch.

His love.

I can feel him all around me and feel his soft kisses on my forehead, neck and tip of my nose. I love when he kisses me on my forehead. To me, those are the best kind of kisses. It’s gentle, sweet and full of love. There’s nothing sexual or naughty. It shows pure love and joy.

Kiss me always on the forehead.

Kiss me always on the tip of my nose.

Kiss me always.

Four weeks and I’ll never let go.

Four weeks.

Four weeks.

Four weeks.

Feeling the warmth of the sun on my skin I hold my head up high and walk into hell. I walk into the place which holds demons, monsters, and people who need to burn in hell. I didn’t believe in evil, but knowing the cruelty several of these people have inflicted, this holds the definition of evil and it exists within these walls.

Taking my seat behind the glass I pick up the phone and wait for him to say something.

“What are you doing here?” He stares at me with darkness and zero ounce of integrity or wholeness.

“I’m here to look at you,” I bravely say. “To say I forgive you.”

“You what?”

“I forgive you, Devin. I don’t want to live my life hating you and wishing death on your soul. You’re getting what you deserve and there’s nothing that can be done. I thank you for pleading guilty and not dragging us through court. You’re doing the right thing.” He looks away from me and rubs his jaw. “Look at me, Devin.”

“I can’t, okay?” He sighs. “Hearing you thank me. You’re fucking thanking me, Caroline. I ruined so many lives and you’re thanking me.”

“I am. Because of you I’m a lot stronger. Because of you I’ve been through the depths of sadness and made it out. You took so much away from me, but I truly believe in forgiveness and letting go. I’m letting go of my anger towards you because you cannot control me. You will not control me.”

“I don’t know what you want me to say, okay?”

“And that’s fine,” I tell him. “You don’t have to say anything. Have a good life, Devin, and I hope you can find who you used to be, because honestly,” I pause and really look at him, “you used to be a good man.”

Hanging up the phone I give him one more look before getting up from the chair and walking out. The warmth of the sun brightens my soul and when I lift my head to the sky I feel strength and courage that I need-that I’ve been looking for. Everything in life happens for a reason and sometimes we may not know the reason, but it’s there, and it will be apparent when you’re ready to face it.

 

 

 

So many people surround me. Our family and friends and fellow officers talk and smile because today’s a celebration. Today’s a celebration of bravery, heroism, and conquering the depths of evil. I see so many smiles and my heart grows bigger knowing what today means; knowing people are here for Mason and Evan. Their bravery inspires people and shows their act of courage should be honored.

Looking up from putting together food I see Mary coming towards me. She’s holding Lila and her smile is addicting.

“How are you holding up, honey?”

“I’m okay.” I smile. “It’s been a rough few months, but I’m truly okay.”

Two months ago Tonya and I brought Lila to the Reeds and told them everything. Mary cried and Christian held me as Rick looked at pictures of Evan. The family, my family, has been through so much and now they’ll have a piece of Evan to hold on to.

“That’s good. Did Tonya tell you? We’re taking Lila for the week to visit my sister and brother-in-law.”

“She did! How exciting is that! She’ll love it.” I look at Lila and hold her tiny little hand. Looking at her brings me peace. Even though Evan did this to me, I have to look at it from another perspective. He’s gone, but a piece of him will remain.

Mary and I talk for a few more minutes before Tonya drags me away so we can go outside by the grill.

“You’re doing okay?” she asks while holding onto my arm.

“Yes,” I laugh. “I don’t know why everyone keeps asking if I’m okay.”

“Because, babe. What you went through is so hard to imagine. I’m proud of you though. You held on and stayed so strong.”

“It’s the only thing I had,” I explain and smile when I see what’s in front of me.

I take a moment and think about the past and the strength I needed to go on. I couldn’t give up, not when Mason was fighting to come back to us. Six months. Six of the longest months I’ve endured. I missed Mason desperately, to the very end of my soul and prayed for him to wake up. I prayed for him to come back to me and hold me like before. I needed to feel safe in his arms. I needed Mason.

Each agonizing month passed and there was no improvement. Doctors told me I needed to think about the next step and I knew that was something I couldn’t do. I felt alone during through months and felt pushed against the wall. At one point I thought about what Mason would have wanted and realized we never talked about what to do if he were ever in a coma. But then I remembered, I knew Mason, and I knew he wouldn’t want to go out like this so I prayed and prayed for him to come back to us . . . to me.

The months passed, but on April tenth, just a little past midnight, Mason opened his eyes and opened his mouth. He took my hand, startling me, and said what my heart already knows.

I stood by his side with each therapy appointment with his physical therapist and therapist. Mason went through some rough patches, but I was never scared of him. I kept telling myself he went through hell and back and I needed to be patient. There would be nights I found him standing by the window and he wouldn’t say anything. He had trouble sleeping and wouldn’t open up. But, everyday that passed, I cherished the good and bad. I cherished every moment because Mason was back and I wasn’t letting him go.

“Why hello future Mrs. Ryan,” I laugh and wrap my arms around his waist as his warmth brings me back to the present. “I love you, baby.”

“I love you too.” I lean up and kiss his lips.

“I can’t wait for tonight,” he whispers in my ears. “In our new house so we can create new memories.

My cheeks turn pink thinking about all the ways Mason can make me moan and the ache between my legs returns.

“Are you thinking about this morning in the bathroom?” He kinks his brow.

“Oh shut up,” I laugh and slap him on the chest.

“That’s a yes,” he laughs with a cocky grin lighting up his face.

“You know I can always withhold sex from you, mister.”

“But you wouldn’t. I’m still wounded . . . just remember that.”

“Uh huh,” I laugh again and kiss him. I’ll never get enough of Mason and the feeling of protection he brings me. “And I’m leaving now. Tonya’s making her special drink and Heather’s giving me the eye.”

That night when Devin and Javier broke into Mason’s home, Devin shot Heather and left her for dead. She wasn’t their target. I was. But because they needed me, wanted me, Devin never checked to make sure she was dead and I thank God every day she survived the gunshot wound.

“I’m stealing my future sister-in-law.” Heather grins at Mason and drags me away. “Seriously, I know you guys are making up for lost time and everything, but don’t forget about the girls who love you!”

“Of course I could never forget you girls!”

When the party’s over and the cleaning crew has left, Mason wastes no time in taking my hand and bringing me upstairs. His hand caresses my face, down my arms and then grips my waist.

“I love you, Care. I love you so fucking much. I know I was gone for so long and I know I’ve said this a million times, but thank you for not giving up on me. Thank you for sticking by my side and loving me through the bad times. This hasn’t been easy for you and I can’t thank you enough for saying
yes
to being my wife.”

“Mason,” I start to say and look into his beautiful eyes. “You have nothing to be thankful for. I was never going to leave your side. You’re my refresh. My life started again when you came back. You gave me reason to believe again. You gave me hope. What you went through. What those two monsters did to you. It’s okay, I get it. The nightmares are slowing down and you’re sleeping a lot better. No one will hurt you and I will be by your side forever. You’re the one for me and I’ll do anything for you.”

Feeling his breath in my hair, my pulse races when his hand grips the material of my dress and slowly he pulls it off and leaves me standing before him in my red strapless bra and panties. He’s studying me, memorizing me again, and I let him. He presses his lips to my neck and I throw my head back moaning in the pure ecstasy he gives me. Closing my eyes I feel him everywhere. I feel him in every inch of my body and soul. My impatient pussy is pulsating and I can’t wait much longer. I open my eyes and stare up at him adoringly. With his eyes on mine, I slowly unhook my bra and slide down my panties.

“Take me, Mason. Take me now.”

Without saying a word he picks me up and instinctively I wrap my legs around his strong waist as he pushes me up against the wall as his hungry lips find mine. Our kiss is passionate, hot, and ignites our bodies. I hear him unzipping his jeans and soon he fills me with what I’ve been waiting for all day.

“Yes, Mason. Just like that,” I whimper and grip his shoulders tight for support. Everything I’m feeling and everything he’s giving me makes me come apart.

“You feel so fucking good, Care,” he grunts giving me everything he has and holding nothing back. “Shit. I can’t hold it much longer.”

“That’s fine,” I moan. “I’m coming, Mason.”

We ride out our orgasm together and soon he has me on our bed, licking me seductively from my calf to my thigh and doing the same to my other leg. Shit, I don’t think I have enough energy for round two, but this feels too good to tell him to stop.

“Now,” he kisses my inner thigh, “I’m going to clean you up and dirty you again, but this time,” he looks into my eyes and cocks his brow, “I’m going to make it slow so you can see how irresistible you are and how much I love you. I’m going to spend the rest of the night cherishing you, Caroline.”

Leaving our bedroom for a moment I try to catch my breath and brace myself for more mind-blowing sex. If I know Mason he will try to kill me tonight.

“Death by insane pleasure,” I mutter and shake my head. Turning to look at my left hand I smile when I see the solitaire diamond ring resting on my ring finger. Our wedding is next June. The anticipation of being his wife is overwhelming and waiting a year to be married isn’t good for my patience. Mason wants to give me the wedding of my dreams. We’re planning on going to Hawaii to marry and spending our honeymoon there. In his eyes I deserve my fairy-tale wedding, and he wants to give that to me. I love him, but honestly, Vegas would be perfectly fine too. It doesn’t matter how we get married because what matters is we get to stand in front of each other, telling the world how we feel, and hearing the words
you may now kiss your bride.
Those things mean more to me than anything.

Hearing the door close I look up to see him walking towards me in just his jeans and I’ll admit my fiancé looks damn good shirtless. He’s bare chested, sporting his very muscular body and very sexy six pack. The delicious V leads to my special place-a place that gives me immense pleasure and joy.

I feel the warm washcloth against me and feel his hand lightly touching my thigh. I’m shaking, arching my back, and he’s barely touching me.

“You smell so good,” he tells me, pressing his face between my thighs and slowly licking me.

My fists clench the sheets as he spreads my thighs wider apart, lifting my ass off the bed and pleasurably assaulting me with his creative tongue. He’s eating me like I’m his last meal and it feels so good. His eyes sear into mine. That insatiable look he has right now is my undoing. I can’t look away and I’m pretty sure if I do he’ll stop and I’ll beg him to continue. At this point I wouldn’t be embarrassed to beg him to pleasure me. The flicker of his tongue and grip he has on my legs has me dizzy and rushing with overwhelming orgasms too unbearable for my body to handle.

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