Released Souls (21 page)

Chapter
18

I walked into th
e kitchen feeling amazing from the night before. Logan was so tender and attentive that even though I didn’t get much sleep, I certainly felt rested. And it was beyond exhilarating how things were starting to come together. We’d gotten Bakula back. I learned where my father had been placed, and now I just needed to figure out when to go find him when I noticed Logan glaring at me from the corner of the room. He didn’t take his eyes off me as I walked to the sink. I placed the mug I was carrying on the counter and gave him a quick smile.

His eyes were as cold as steel.

“Everything okay?” I questioned, staying put.

He didn’t reply, but then I
glimpsed a piece of paper in his hand. He saw that I noticed what he was holding and leaned against the wall, raising one brow.

“So when were you going to leave this for me?” Logan’s eyes were blazing
as he held onto a cream-colored piece of paper.

I had no idea what had gotten him so upset, but I was sure it had to be a misunderstanding.
I wasn’t leaving him anything. I had no idea what he was talking about.

I looked at him wide-eyed and confused, which seemed to only make him angrier.

“I can’t believe you’d do this to me,” his voice filled with rage as his eyes met mine. “With everything we’ve shared?”

I stared at him
, completely unsure of what to do. He began pacing, squeezing the sheet of paper. The
nectunt
we shared ached with every turn of his body.

“I don’t know what you’re talking—” I began.

“Oh, now you’re going to lie about it?” he interrupted, shaking his head. “Unbelievable, absolutely unbelievable. This is your handwriting.”

“Babe,” I whispered.

“Don’t call me that,” his voice was cool and guarded, and so were his eyes.

My insides hurt so badly I couldn’t even speak. What had I done?

“So I’d love to know how long you’ve been planning this? Oh, and I’d love to know when you were gonna do it?”

My mouth went completely dry, and my body began to
shake when I realized he had somehow been given my letter. How did he get it? I had burned it. I had burned that letter. The room began spinning, and I felt for the counter to lean against.

“It’s not like that,” I began, m
y voice trembling.

“Really?” It’s all right here,” he s
aid, shaking the piece of paper at me.

I stared at what was in his hands and it looked like n
ew. Nothing was pieced together. Edges weren’t burnt. It really was like new.

“Please, listen to me,” I begged. “It’s not what you think.”

“Yeah, you say that now because I found it before you wanted, but your real intentions couldn’t be more clear.” I could tell he was choking back a lot more than anger as he spoke, which only gnarled my insides more.

“Maybe you’re like your father.
You just use people how you see fit. Don’t you say something like that here?” He waived it again.

Oh my god. It really was the letter.

“Logan, please,” I cried. “I burned it. I never planned on giving it to you. I never planned on leaving. It was an exercise.”

In two steps he was hovering over me. His fingers trembling
as he held onto the paper carrying the words I never intended for him to see.

“You don’t understand
. I wrote that to rid myself of the guilt. I don’t want anything to happen to you. I’d never leave you, but it’s like something always happens to the people I care about. I was only trying to get rid of all the feelings I’ve had inside — the self-doubt, worry, sadness. When I wrote it, I knew I’d never leave you. I just had to get it out. It was just therapy.” I looked into his eyes, hoping to connect on some level.

“I wish I could believe you,
” his voice was distant. He was only inches away from me as he placed a hand on each side of me, gripping the kitchen counter.

I closed my eye
s, attempting to force back the tears. I could feel the heat of his breath rushing over me.

“
I destroyed it.” The tears wouldn’t stop.

“Is that so?”

“What can I do to prove it?” I whispered. Everything in my body ached.

Looking up at him
, I reached out for him and he quickly backed away.

“And to think of the things I was going to try to fit in for us before…” his voice trailed off, and h
is azure eyes held a darkness that I knew I couldn’t reach. There was nothing I could do. He didn’t believe me. He wouldn’t believe me.

He turned around and walked out of the kitchen.

“I’m gonna go for a walk.” Logan slammed the front door and my world crumbled into a million pieces that I didn’t think I’d ever be able to paste back together.

I knew what I ha
d written in that letter, and I couldn’t even forgive myself.

***

I had searched everywhere for Logan and didn’t find any trace of him. The
nectunt
was silent. It didn’t even ache as it had in the kitchen. He had shut me out. I walked down to the park, circled my way back through each of the blocks leading back to our house, and even sat at a Starbucks for hours, hoping I’d catch him wandering by.

On my way back to the h
ouse, I wandered past a woman who was pushing a stroller, and I dipped my gaze to the bucket to see the baby. It was empty. She was pushing around an empty stroller. My eyes quickly dashed up her body, and I began to sense an aura that I’d only come across a couple times.

It was Eben. I had to get back to the house. I
had made myself vulnerable, wandering around, and all I could do was hope that Eben thinks he was hidden well enough. I had plans that needed to be executed tomorrow, and I had to hope Logan would be back by then. I needed to release my father, smart or not, and I couldn’t be distracted like this. Walking as fast I as I could without giving off the appearance of knowing, I felt the aura become more and more distant. I didn’t think he was coming after me. I couldn’t let my emotions do this to me. I had completely let my guard down, but I wouldn’t be fooled again.

Feeling the strength, fake as it was, fill me back up
brought me back to what was expected of me. Even though every fiber of my being felt shredded, I had to focus on getting the information. I didn’t have the luxury to be able to wallow around in my misery.

I didn’t even buy my pep talk. How in the world would anyone else?

Relief spread through me as I opened the front door and was greeted with several bouquets of daisies, along with a trail of petals leading up the stairs. Passion Pit was rolling down the staircase, with a song that was all too fitting. Guilt riddled me as I thought about our argument. I wondered how long he had been back at the house. Maybe he’d found the box of therapy letters my mom kept at the other house — our real house. She kept them under her bed. Could I be that lucky? I could only hope.

“Logan?” I called, leaning up the first few steps.

He didn’t respond, but that didn’t stop me from climbing the steps two at a time.

“I’m so sorry
for hurting you,” I whispered, reaching the landing.

A hand slid around my
shoulder, and something pricked me in the neck. I turned around quickly to see Lara smiling at me while she placed the cap back on the syringe.

“How did you find us?” I asked, but my body collapsed before I could hear her answer.

I heard a slight humming from a woman’s voice and attempted to open my eyes, but I was still too out of it. I couldn’t even get my lids to flutter. I was propped upright in a swivel chair of some sort, and my hands were tied behind my back to the chair. This wasn’t a good position to be in. Not to mention I still didn’t know where Logan was. If he returned to the house and didn’t find me, he might not think much of it. After all, the letter said that was my plan.

“Looks like someone’s trying to wake up,” Lara said. “Did you have a restful sleep? That stuff is supposed to do wonders.
”

I shook my head slightly, not because I wanted to. It just happened naturally.

“Well, it looks like that letter certainly did wonders for you two lovebirds,” her words stabbed me in the heart. Of course it was her, but how did she find out about it? I knew spells existed to resurrect things from flames and such, but how’d she know that it existed in the first place.

“Do you miss him or are you relieved? That’s the real sign,” she continued, but my body remained motionless.
She laughed loudly.

“Do you miss him?”

My head nodded yes even though I tried to stop it. I didn’t want to give her the satisfaction of supplying any answers.

“Are you relieved?” she laughed. “I bet on some level you are.”

My head shook violently no, still not under my control.

Besides knocking me out there had to have been some kind of truth serum in the mixture or something.
Not good.

I could hear her rustling around in a bag and then it turned silent, right before I felt another prick of a needle jabbed into my neck.

My eyes flashed open, revealing Lara’s evil grin right in front of me.

Logan was right. The age of witchcraft had certainly changed.

“It’s good to see you’re back with us.”

I looked
through my heavy lids around the room, hoping it was somewhere I recognized, but it wasn’t. It looked like I was in an attic with only the circular windows at the peak. The walls were white and so was the carpet. It was a really sterile place. I saw two metal file cabinets and a desk where Lara appeared to be working on something before my wake up call. There were a few blue pillows scattered around the floor, and a black cat sleeping on one of them. I immediately began feeling sorry for the feline.

Lara swung her leg
s over the armrest of the chair and swiveled around so she could sit and stare at me. If this was all that was going to be happening, it was going to be a very long day.

“Where are we?” I asked, my voice hoarse.

“Wouldn’t you like to know,” she replied coyly. There’s no way she’s really related.

“Yeah
. I would like to know…otherwise I wouldn’t have asked.” I raised a brow at her, and her response was to glare at me.

“What is it you want?” I asked, trying to sound
totally bored even though I was completely panicking.

“Oh, so many things,” she began. “World domination, you dead, Logan as my toy, life forever after. Boy, I could really go on and on.” Her eyes drilled into me.

Hearing her mention Logan made the frenzy inside of me uncontrollable.
The coolness began spilling out of my fingertips, but I couldn’t let her see it. I couldn’t let her find out I had
Caneo
abilities. For once, I was thankful that my hands were tied behind me. If I were to use these abilities, it would have to be to end her, not to disarm her. I couldn’t let her take this information back to Eben.

I stared blankly at her.

“You’re pretty crafty. I’ll give you that. But I don’t see anything so special about you. There’s no reason you’ve got what it takes over me and my experience,” she said, moving her legs from the armrest.

Here we go again.

“I know. I know. You’re better than me, cooler than me, more experienced than me… I get it.” I folded my fingers into a ball, hoping that the fury would die down enough. I could feel the metal still dribbling from my fingertips.
Drats!

“You know, though, age isn’t everything. Sometimes it’s j
ust best to know when to retire,” I replied. Her eyes flashed a hatred I could use to my advantage. “Speaking of which, Eben really looked frail last time I saw him.” I raised a brow, shifting my head to one side.

“You’re only adding to his already
fragile state. He’s not a young man and whenever he shapeshifts or really does much of anything at this point, he’s drained of energy. We’ve got ways to combat it, but they’re failing. He used to take the formula once a day. Now he has to take it every hour.”

Formula?

“That’s why I need to take you out once and for all. He doesn’t see it. He’s got some romantic notion of you being the next leader for the order, but I know better. If I take you out, he’ll be able to recover enough, and he’ll have no choice but to appoint me.” She was grinning and uncaring. She fully believed that she was going to kill me, so it didn’t bother her that she divulged information. I tried not to let her certainty unnerve me. But it did make me wonder what she had planned.

The cat got up and arched its back in a long, stress-free stretch and began walking toward the stairs.

“What’s the cat’s name?” I asked, plastering a fake smile on my lips.

She shrugged her shoulders. “I have no idea. It’s not my house.”

Okay. So I was in a house that she wasn’t necessarily connected with. That was a start.