Relentless Hope (Resilient Hearts) (15 page)

Aiden gives her a mischievous smile. “No, she’s not my cousin. Why don’t you ask her yourself who she is?”

She turns her questioning eyes to me, whirling her blonde waves around with the motion. “Who are you? Are you related to Aiden?”

For some reason the whole encounter makes me really angry. Even though, I’m normally nice to people, I can’t help the disdain in my voice. “I live here. The real question is who are you?”

“Who am I? I’m the woman who just gave Aiden the most amazing night of his life, and we were about to go for round two before we were rudely interrupted... Isn’t that right, babe?” she asks, turning a seductive smile to Aiden.

“No, we weren’t. In fact, you were about to leave,” replies Aiden, his eyes still locked on mine.

“WHAT? What do you mean? You just said you wanted to go for round two.” She pouts.

“I changed my mind. It’s time for you to leave. Hurry up and put your clothes on. I want you gone quickly.”

“Asshole,” she mutters under her breath, before turning her back to us both and walking in. Aiden stands there for a few more minutes until we hear the click of his bedroom door opening and then being slammed against the door frame. A smile forms on the corner of his mouth at the realization that the blonde is gone. He turns his head back to me, giving me a wink before going inside.

I stare at the spot he vacated long after he’s gone, wondering whether I should be disgusted at his behavior or thankful that he sent her on her way. The more I think about it, the more I feel repulsed at the way he treated this woman. I’m not a fan of the snobbish slutty behavior she just exhibited, but I believe no woman should be treated that way by a man, after he just used her body. After the degrading way my family treated me, I’m sensitive to the way men see women and how they think they can treat them as they wish, and Aiden’s behavior doesn’t sit well with me.

I run into Aiden as I’m coming back from my morning jog.

“Hey. I was looking for you,” he says with a smile.

“What for?”

“I wanted to see what you’re doing for lunch.”

I try to hide my surprise and let my anger speak. “I’m busy… I have plans,” I lie, my eyes avoiding his.

He studies me for a few seconds before finally asking, “Did I do something wrong? Are you mad at me?”

I take a deep breath, trying to control the anger simmering beneath the surface. “I have to ask you something. Do you treat all women like trash or just the ones you screw?”

His jaw drops, his face showcasing his shocked expression. “What are you talking about?” he manages to ask.

“You practically threw the girl from this morning out of the house after you used her for sex. Don’t you think that’s disrespectful?”

A hearty laugh escapes his mouth. “Disrespectful? To Lindsey? Now that’s funny. Lindsey wouldn’t know respect if you throw it at her face... I’ve known Lindsey for a long time, and she knows me well. She knew exactly what she was getting into. I make these women no promises. If they come begging me to take them home, they should know, they’d be asked to leave when I’m done with them.”

“Then why did she act so surprised and hurt when you told her to leave?”

“That’s because she’s acting. I’m sure she didn’t want to leave, but I guarantee you she wasn’t too surprised. Why are you defending her anyway? I sent her away because she was rude to you. I was defending
you
.”

Despite my disgust with his behavior, I can’t help the warm fuzzy feeling moving up my chest. “I…I’m a little sensitive to situations where I think a woman is being unfairly taken advantage of... I didn’t realize you’re sending her away because of me…I…I guess, thank you.”

“I wasn’t taking advantage of Lindsey. She wanted to come home with me. I respect men and women alike, when they deserve it.”

I nod my head and think of something to change the subject, not wanting this conversation to be dragged on any longer.

A
knock on my bedroom door grabs my attention. “
Come in
,” I say to the closed door. The door opens revealing Aiden’s gorgeous smile. “Hey, can I come in?”

“Sure, what’s going on?” I ask hesitatingly.

“Nothing much. Just wanted to let you know I’m throwing a party here tomorrow night. There will be a lot of people. I’d like to invite you to join us, if you’re interested, but I should warn you it will be a rowdy crowd.”

“A party? What’s the occasion?”

“No specific occasion, just moving to my grandpa’s house, I guess…it should be fun. I’m bringing a DJ, and there’ll be food and lots of booze.”

The thought of partying with Aiden’s friends gives me heartburn. I’m not a party girl to begin with, but going to a party where all of Aiden’s stuck-up friends who probably know I was married to his grandpa will be is downright terrifying.

“Thanks for the invite. I think I’ll skip this one, but I appreciate you telling me about it.”

“Of course. You live here. I wouldn’t throw a party here without telling you first.”

I want to tell him that you just did. That telling me after you’ve already invited all of your friends doesn’t really count as letting your housemate know you’re having a party, but instead I bite my tongue. There’s been enough tension between us already in the past few days. I don’t want to add any more fuel to the simmering fire, so I nod my head instead.

As soon as he’s gone, I start to think of a way to stay away from this place for the duration of the party. I decide to call Mia to see if she wants to get together. When I tell her I want to get away for a night, she squeals in excitement.

“Yay. It’s about time you got out of the house, girl. Wear something sexy. We’re going to go out and have a fantastic time.”

I smile at Mia’s enthusiasm. Her bubbly personality always has a way of putting a smile on my face.

Mia’s excitement robs off on me, as I think about getting out of my comfort zone and having some fun for a night. I decide that I need a new outfit for my night out on the town, and I head out to go shopping.

After trying a million outfits on, I finally decide to go with something simple. I pick a pair of black skinny jeans and a red strapless top that shows a little too much cleavage for my taste, but will sure get a nod of approval from Mia. I find myself a pair of red stilettos to go with the top and head home.

I take my time getting ready, styling my waves just the right
way and
putting my make up on a little heavier than usual. Mia picks me at seven, way before the first guests arrive at the party and before I have a chance of running into Aiden, and we head to a trendy Sushi place for dinner.

As always, conversation with Mia is fun and uplifting. She tells me about her summer adventures and I ask her about her on and off relationship with Kevin. She seems hesitant to talk about him at first, but finally opens up.

“I don’t know, Aleah. Every time we start getting too close, he pulls back shutting me down. There is something going on with him that I just can’t figure out. I’m starting to get tired of it, not sure it’s even worth trying anymore.”

“He seemed like a great guy and appears too really like you. I’m sure he’s worth it.”

“He is…but I just don’t know if there’s any point in trying. I can’t wait forever for him to open up to me. We’ve been dating on and off for about six months now. I’ve never had to fight so hard to figure out a guy. It’s really frustrating… But enough of my miserable dating life. Tell me about the sexy hunk you live with. What’s the latest shenanigan he’s pulled?”

I tell her about the scene I ran into in the living room and the subsequent encounter on the balcony. When she hears about Aiden kicking the girl out, she bursts out laughing.

“The look on the bitch’s face must have been priceless. Oh, what I wouldn’t give to see that look,” she says, in between bursts of laughs.

“Mia–that’s so mean,” I try to chastise, but can’t help the smile stretching across my face.

“Well, she was mean to you, and from the sounds of it is a stuck-up clingy slut. I’d say she deserved what Aiden did to her. Plus, when you throw yourself at a guy like Aiden, you should know what you’re in for.”

“You say that, and still want
me
to throw myself at him?”

“No, I never suggested
that
. Placing yourself in his path is different than throwing yourself at him. Plus, I know you wouldn’t do that. You’re just not like that. You respect yourself too much to do that… If something happens between you and Aiden, it’s because he’s interested in you and not just for a one night rumble in the sheets. Though, I would totally do a guy like him, even if it’s just for one night.”

“Oh, Mia,” I burst out laughing.

She shrugs her shoulders. “It’s true, I would, but the point is you’re far from a slut and you’re not after him for money. He’s hot and seems interested in you. I’m not suggesting that you ask him to take you to bed, but if he wants to hang out with you, don’t say no. Just go with the flow. See what happens, and if it leads to you getting a taste of what he has to offer down under, then have fun with it.”

I think Mia’s words over and can’t help a shaky breath before I respond. “The problem is after the experience I had with Imran, I’m just not sure I can stomach a guy who looks at me as a piece of meat. I don’t even know if I’m capable of opening myself up to any guy yet, let alone someone that has a reputation almost as bad as Imran.”

“Aleah–Aiden is not Imran, not every guy you come across will be like him. I know you’re scarred from what happened with Imran and putting yourself out there will be scary at first. But you have to take that step one way or another. Plus, this will be different from your experience with Imran, because you’re not naïve like before and you know the warning signs. You’re also not expecting this to be your happily ever after. Don’t expect anything long term from Aiden but also make it clear to him from the beginning that he can’t disrespect you. Anything that happens after that, just enjoy the ride…and I mean that literally.” She says with a devilish smile. “You know you want to.”

“That’s the problem, I really want to, but I’m scared as hell, especially after I saw his behavior towards these women.”

“After what you went through, it’s normal to be scared, but you have to move past it.”

After dinner, Mia takes me to a trendy club on Sunset Boulevard I don’t want to know what strings she had to pull to get us into this place, but I can tell the club is upscale and pretty exclusive, and it’s jumping by the time we get there. We stand on the sidelines, people watching until one of Mia’s favorite songs comes on and she grabs my arm, pulling me towards the dance floor.

We dance together for a few minutes until a good looking blonde guy cuts in and starts dancing with Mia. I move to the music by myself for a couple of minutes before I feel two hands coming around my waist from the back and pulling me hard against a male body. My body tenses instantly, my heart rate quickening to a frantic pace, as I remember another time when male hands wrapped around my waist and pulled my body hard against his. Against my will.

The guy behind me takes my hesitation as acquiescence, and starts to rub himself against my backside.

And I lose it.

Cold sweat starts running down my hands and breathing becomes hard, as panic overtakes my body. Images buried deep inside the crevices of my memory surface to the front, making my muscles to lock up and my blood to go cold.

My mind tells me I have to get out of the dance floor before I start to hyperventilate, but I can’t move my legs.

Mia turns around at this point. As soon as she lays her eyes on me, she grabs my hand and pulls me out towards the exit sign.

She doesn’t even ask me anything. I guess the look on my face said it all. Once we are outside, she gives me a tight hug, rubbing her hands on my back. “It’s okay, Aleah. Breathe. Just breathe. No one is going to hurt you here.”

Hearing her words finally brings me out of my momentary flashback back to reality, making blood slowly return to my paralyzed limbs and calming my racing heart. We walk in silence to the car. After a few minutes of quiet ride in the car, I’m finally calm enough to speak.

“I’m sorry, I ruined your night,” I say in a whisper.

“You didn’t ruin anything, Aleah. I’m sorry I brought you to this place. You’re clearly not ready for a scene like this. We’re going to a more quiet place where we can just chill for a little bit.”

I remain silent, not knowing what to say. After a few minutes, Mia starts, “I think you need therapy, Aleah. You’re clearly not over what happened.”

“Yea, I think I do,” I say.

As hard as it is to admit that, I have to accept the reality. I thought I was over what happened. Had the illusion that I had moved on and time had healed the old wounds, but clearly putting a bandage on an open wound does not heal the festering underneath.

We go to a quiet bar near the campus. Once we’re seated at a table, Mia orders a drink and places it in front of me when it arrives. “Drink this. It’ll help calm you down.”

“Mia−I’ve never really drank before. I don’t want to get drunk.”

“Q
uit worrying. This one drink won’t get you drunk. Just drink… You need it.”

“I lift up the glass to my lips and take a hesitant sip from the straw. It’s surprising sweet and fruity, making me love the taste instantly. “This is really good. It doesn’t taste like alcohol at all.”

“Don’t be fooled by the taste. It still has a good amount of alcohol, but not enough to get you drunk.”

We stay mostly quiet for most of the rest of the evening, my earlier panic attack dampening both of our moods. When it’s late enough that I think the party at home will be over by now, I ask Mia to drive me back.

When we get to the driveway, I dreadfully realize my mistake. There are still lots of cars parked on the driveway and as soon as I step out, I hear the thumping sound music coming from inside. Mia offers to take me some place else where we can hang out a bit longer and wait for the party to die down, but I decide to thicken my skin and walk in. All I need to do is make it to my room anyway. With the amount of alcohol these people have consumed by now, I’m sure no one will even notice me.

I open the door and take a peek inside. There are about a dozen people standing around near the foyer area and a couple of girls sitting on the stairs. I strengthen my spine and walk in, avoiding eye contact with all.

I have made it only a couple of steps up the stairs, when one of the girls sitting there grabs my ankle, as I try to pass by.

“Hey you−get me another beer, will you?”

I turn around slowly. She can’t be talking to me, can she? I look around and realize there is looking directly at me and is still grabbing my ankle, so she must be talking to me.

“Excuse me?” I say, through clench
ed teeth.

“You heard me. Get me another beer.” She orders, her voice stuttering.

“Why are you asking
me
?”

“Because I want a fucking beer and you’re one of the girls who work here, duh. How stupid can you be?” she asks in a raised voice.

Heat rises up my face in anger, but I stay polite. “I’m sorry, you have the wrong person. I don’t work here,” I say, as I try to free my ankle from her firm grip. She tightens her grasp instead.

“Yes, you do. Don’t try to lie to me. I just want a fucking beer,” she says, raising her voice even higher.

I look around and notice a few heads turning our way. I swirl my head around to study the girl in an effort to determine what she’s up to. She is clearly very drunk, and must be mistaking me for one of the servers Aiden has hired for this party.

I debate internally how I should handle this situation. The one thing I know for sure is that I don’t want to make a scene. As it appears the only way I can get passed her without attraction more attention is to get her a drink, I decide to do just that instead of getting into a fight.

She hands me her empty bottle as I take the few steps back down. Once I reach the first floor and start moving towards the kitchen, a few other people start giving me their empty bottles. At this point, I really don’t bother to argue with anyone else. I just want to get to the kitchen and get her beer so I can get to my room as fast as possible. So instead of refusing, I accept the empty bottles and before I know, I have five or six in my hands.