Remember Love (7 page)

Tucker

I sit on the edge of Brenna’s
bed. No way am I going out there in front of Lexi with an erection. I hadn’t intended to take things so far just yet. I need to make Brenna mine, but not till she’s ready for more. I want forever with her, not just this weekend.

I can hear her talking
with Lexi but can’t make out their words. Whatever they are doing, Lexi is laughing. The door closes and I hear silence. I guess Lexi went home. Taking a deep breath and slowly releasing it, I stand up to head into the living room.

Brenna is leaning back on the door with her eye
s closed. I step as lightly as possible, which isn’t really easy when you’re my size; a little over six foot two inches tall, and weigh two hundred pounds. I stop in front of her, just as her eyes open. I can see in her eyes that she wants me as much as I want her. I just need to know that it’s more than physical.

“Hi,
” Brenna says shyly, slightly blushing.

“Hi.” I step
forward and run my fingers across her cheeks.

I should have known she’d be a little embarrassed
. This is new territory for us. Before today we had held hands, hugged, and kissed, but nothing more. She was too young back then, and by the time she was old enough to want more, Wesley entered the picture.

I grit my teeth at this thought
. We must have this conversation, and I’m not sure how she’s going to react. Taking her hand in mine, I lead her to the couch where I take a seat and guide her down beside me.

She asks,
“Do you wanna watch some TV while we eat or would you rather just talk?”

“Depends on what we’re gonna talk about.”

“Wesley,” she says softly.

“Oh.”
If I hadn’t been sitting so close to her I wouldn’t have heard her response.

“I guess we could eat and talk.
You want something cold to drink?”

“That’d be great
. Thanks.”

Brenna stands and
watch her backside as she makes her way to the kitchen. What can I say? She has a great ass and I’m a guy.

A few minutes later she enters the room, giving me a big smile. Then she takes her seat beside me again.

This really isn’t a conversation I want to have with her, but I need to make sure he is finally out of her life. She needs to know about all the things he told me while they were tog
ether. He’s such a dick. I’ll never figure out what she saw in him.

I say, “I know what Wesley told me, but
I want to know your version of those two years.”

“Okay
, I guess I’ll start at the beginning. I met Wesley on my sixteenth birthday. I rode to the Shell station with Angie, you probably don’t know her, but she was at my party and didn’t want to ride alone. Anyway, he was in the parking lot talking to another guy and was just watching me. When we came back outside and Angie said my name, his friend hollered ‘Hey are you Brenna James?’ I nodded my head at them and Wesley walked over.”

Grinding my teeth hard I knew that fucker lied to me.

She continued, “He introduced himself and we stood there and talked for about thirty minutes or so before he asked me out. I agreed. We exchanged numbers and then a few weeks later we started dating. I didn’t know y’all were friends until after the second or third week we started dating.”

She’s looking at me now
, and I’m trying hard not to let my anger build.

“Brenna
, he was never really my friend. I knew him from school and we had a few of the same friends, but he was never my friend. I found that out the hard way.”

“What do you mean
? What did he do to you?”

“I will tell you after you finish your story.”

Brenna tells me about some of their dates. Their first Valentine’s Day, their first breakup. All of this should have been mine. This fucker swooped in, knowing that I was finally just about to walk back into her life. I’m only about halfway listening to her speech because I don’t want to hear those parts. I already heard them from that cocky bastard. Finally, she gets to the final breakup, and then to the day she saw me sitting with Wesley. The last time I saw her before last Friday.

“Brenna
, you asked me what Wesley meant that day and I’m going to tell you now.”

“Okay.”

“Wesley asked you out that day because he knew I was about to.”

She opens her mouth to talk but, I p
lace my finger over her lips to stop her.

I continue,
“He’d heard me tell stories about us and he knew how I felt about you. For whatever reason, to get back at me, he made sure he got to you first. I’m still not sure what I did to him, nor do I care.”

I paused for a moment to
give her a chance to speak. When she doesn’t I decide to tell her the rest. “I know all about your relationship with him.
Everything
from his mouth,” I put emphasis on
everything.
“He made sure I got every detail.”

She gasps as this sinks in
, and she realizes what I am talking about. “You mean he told you about us having sex? That’s what you mean by
everything
?”

“Yes
, down to the last detail. And none of it was ever good.” I think I just broke a molar. The hurt on her face pisses me off. Not at her, but at him. No one should know the things he told me, and I wasn’t the only one he ran his mouth too.

After what happened between us a few minutes ago I know that most of what he said wasn’t true. It feels good to know that she responded to m
y body the way she did. A way she apparently never did with him if half of what he said was actually true.

“Oh my God
, Tucker! What a dick! Why didn’t you tell me before now? I spent two years going back and forth with that asshole and no one bothered to tell me he was talking shit about me behind my back?”

“I was mad at you for so long
. That’s why I’d leave when you came around. I couldn’t stand to see you with him. Then there was the fact that I knew what he was doing behind your back. I felt guilty because I couldn’t bring myself to tell you. I couldn’t get over my own hurt and anger.”

“What do you mean by
‘what he was doing behind my back’? Was there more?”

I nod slowly
, not really wanting to be the one to tell her, even though I’m the one who started this. “He cheated on you almost the whole time. There was always you and someone else. When you weren’t with him, any number of other girls were.”

“That fucker
! I should’ve known better and you should have told me, Tucker. How could you not? What did I do to you to make you hate me enough that you would sit back and watch while he made a fucking fool out of me?”

Brenna jumps off the
couch. I watch her as she rushes to the bathroom and slams the door.

I feel like such
a dick right now. I know I should have told her but I couldn’t. I was so hurt and angry then. But now, how do I make this right?

I sit on her couch
, debating about whether I should head home or try to make her understand. I can’t just walk away. I did that twice already, and I’ll be damned if I do it again.

Brenna

I can’t stop the tears that are rolling down my face
. I have never felt like a bigger fool than I feel right at this moment. I shouldn’t blame Tucker though. It’s not his fault. I understand that he was hurt and angry too, even though I’m not sure why. It had been two years since I laid eyes on him when I met Wesley. So why should he care who I went out with?

“Brenna
, open the door and talk to me. Don’t shut me out now. Please don’t let this come between us. I just wanted it all out there so we could move forward.”

“Why didn’t you tell me
, Tucker?” I ask as I open the door with one hand and wipe the tears away with the other.

“Damn
, baby. Don’t cry,” Tucker says as he reaches out and pulls me into his chest, wrapping me in his arms. “Please don’t cry. Not for him. He’s not worth it.”

“I’m not crying for him. I feel like a fool.”
I sniffle and rub my face across his chest.

“I’m the fool Brenna
. Not you. I let him get to you
and
to me and I couldn’t see past my own issues to protect you. I should have protected you.”

“You wouldn’t even talk to me
. Why would you care that I was dating Wesley? I don’t get that.”

“I won’t tell you yet why I quit talking to y
ou. I will tell you this though; I had every intention of walking back into your life when you were old enough to date. He just beat me to it. I cared because I’d been waiting for two years to hold you in my arms again."

Not sure
how to respond, I don’t say anything for a minute. I still don’t get why he waited. Everything was perfect between us before that last summer. And then nothing. He was gone. “Why didn’t you say anything all the times me and Wesley broke up?”

“Because I was young, hurt, angry, and stupid for listening to him. Knowing that he took you
r virginity broke my heart. I had waited for you, and to hear from him that you hadn’t waited for me broke me.”

Fresh tears well
up in my eyes. I lean back and seeing the tears in Tucker’s eyes breaks my heart.

I broke his heart
, and I didn’t even know it.

I step back and gently push him out of the bathroom
. Taking his hand, I lead him into my room and sit down on the bed pulling him next to me.

“I’m sorry
, Tucker. I know it’s a little late now to be saying this but I want you to know that I’m sorry. I never meant to hurt you. I thought you hated me then.”

“I’ve never hated you
, Brenna. I tried to though, I just couldn’t.”

“Is that all there is about
Wesley? Can we officially close this conversation now?”

“I have one more question and a confession
, then we consider it closed. Are things still over between you two?”

“Yes
, that’s been over for a long time.”

Tucker lets out a breath and a small smile forms. He has the best smiles
, and I’m relieved to see it there again.

He says
, “After you left for college, Wesley came looking for me and was saying all kinds of shit. I knew it wasn’t true, but I lost my temper and beat the shit out of him. I don’t think he’ll ever get close enough to breathe the same air as you again.”

“How did you know they weren’t true?”

“I didn’t go far that day. I waited and watched as he drove away and then I followed you. I was hoping you were heading to the cave but you got on the interstate instead. And well… now, here we are.”

“Here we are
? But what are we, friends again? Or do you want more?”

“
I want whatever you want as long as it includes me and you.”

“So if I said all I want is to be friends again
, you’d be okay with that?”

“You’d be in my life again
. So, yeah. I’d settle for that.”

“And if I said I wanted to be your girlfriend
? You’d be okay with that?”

“I’d absolutely be okay with that.”

“What if I said I wanted to be your wife and have a house full of babies? Would you be okay with that?”

I watch as the smile leaves Tucker’s face
, and the most serious expression I’ve seen yet appeared. “I’d be okay with that, too.”

“I was just kidding about that part
. I just wanted to see what you’d say,” I tell him and shove his shoulder. I really wasn’t expecting him to answer that way.

“I wasn’t.”

Wow. Once again, he renders me speechless.

I
say, “Okay. So, you’re staying here tonight, right?”

“Unless you don’t want me too
. I brought some stuff with me in case I stayed.”

“I want you to stay.”

Leaning over and turning his face to mine. I place a kiss on his lips. “Go get your stuff while I get ready for bed.”

Tucker gets up and heads out of my bedroom. I won’t let
everything he’s told me tonight stand in our way. Being with Tucker is the most natural thing in the world to me, and I’m holding on with both hands.

Tucker

Brenna may have been joking
, but I wasn’t. I would marry that girl right this minute if that’s what she wanted. She’s not quite ready for that yet and that’s okay. It will happen someday. I thought I was about to lose her after our conversation about her ex. I hope she understands why I didn’t put a stop to her and Wesley a long time ago.

Stepping out into the parking lot
, I head over to my truck to grab my bag and lean back against the bed to give Brenna a little time to herself. I couldn’t say anything to her then. I hadn’t spoken to her in two years. What was I supposed to do, walk up to her and say, “Hey Brenna, I know I’ve been absent from your life, but Wesley’s a dick. Don’t go there.”

Yeah
, that would have gone over like a lead balloon. Here I was, an eighteen-year-old boy who was in love with his childhood best friend. I’d waited for her to be old enough to date, to share all her firsts with me; I should have fought for her. I shouldn’t have let anyone come between us. But I did and I hope she doesn’t make me pay for that now by throwing away this chance we have right out the window.

Lost in my own thoughts
, I don’t see Lexi getting out of her car until I hear her voice.

“Hey Tucker, what are you doing out here?”

“Just grabbing my bag.” Lifting my bag, I shut the door and start walking toward her.

“Brenna’s letting you stay the night?”

“Yeah?” This comes out as a question; by the look on Lexi’s face, I think this is something unusual.

“Really
? Well, that’s a first.”

“Is it now? Did you think she’d make me drive home tonight?”

“Actually, yes I did. As long as I’ve known Brenna, no one has ever spent the night at her apartment.”

Lexi
can’t possibly understand how happy she just made me with that little piece of information. I figured she’d dated and moved on with her life like most girls would have. Now I’m curious and I’m thinking Lexi is the best person to ask.

“
So, you’re saying I will be the first guy to spend the night with Brenna?”

“Look Tucker
, I know what you’re trying to do. You want me to spill all the deets on Brenna, right?”

I
simply nod my head to say “yes” not wanting to say anything that may keep her from continuing. I know I could ask Brenna whatever I want to know but right now I feel like I need to hear what Lexi has to say.

“Al
l right, Tucker, it’s like this. I like you and I know a lot more about you than you know about me. I think you’re the best thing for Brenna and I’m willing to help y’all find your way back to each other.”

I could almost kiss Lexi right now. “I appreciate all the help I can get.”

“We partied a lot during freshman year and you know she hung out with a few different guys, but I’m pretty sure that’s all she done. She was pretty drunk one night and she told me all about y’all. From the moment y’all met to the time she moved away. That was the last time she got drunk. Brenna has pretty much been a recluse since.”

“So
, she doesn’t date?”

“No
, she doesn’t date. She goes to school and she studies. If it wasn’t for me busting in on her, I think she’d be alone all the time.”

“Then I’m glad she has you.” I mean that
, too. I don’t want Brenna alone and Lexi seems to care about her and her happiness, so I’m really glad she has a friend like her.

“Thanks. I know I could never take your place in the BFF department
, but I try to be the best friend she’ll let me be.”

“I haven’t been a very good friend to her over the last eight years.”

“You’re here now and that’s all that matters. You know she told me all about last weekend. She seemed to be really happy you stepped back into her life.”

“I hope so
, Lexi. I really hope so.”

Lexi just smiles at m
e and starts heading to her door, so I follow, thinking it’s time to get back inside before Brenna comes out and hears us talking. Not that I’m trying to hide it. I just don’t want her to think I’m going behind her back to interrogate Lexi. Sometimes you need an outside source to help you see what you may be missing.

Before opening her door
, Lexi gives me a look. I can tell there is something she wants to say so I wait with my hand on the doorknob.

Lexi says,
“She said that before she left here Friday she had a feeling her life was about to change. You are that change, Tucker. I feel it. I see the way you look at her even if she doesn’t. She also said there was something you wanted her to remember and I think I know what that is. I just hope she sees it soon. It’s time for y’all to get your happily ever after.”

With that Lexi enters
her apartment and closes the door. I stand there for a minute absorbing what she said, hoping she’s right. Hopefully Brenna will remember what we once shared and want a life with me, like I do with her.

Stepping through the door
way, I shut and lock it behind me and head into the bathroom to change. When I’m done I take my stuff back into the living room, dropping my bag on the floor beside the couch.

I hear her voice call out from her room,
“Tucker, what’s taking you so long? Come on.” 

“I figured I’d sleep on the couch.”

“You don’t have to do that. My bed’s big enough for the both of us.”

Groaning softly so she doesn’t hear
, I head towards her room. At her bedroom door, I’m frozen. Brenna’s back is facing me as she does something, maybe plugging in her phone, and she’s wearing the shortest and tightest pair of pink shorts I have ever seen.

This is gonna be a long night.