Resurrected (28 page)

As he pressed his cold
body against me, I felt it as though I was there and not just
witnessing a false memory.

“I want you. I need you–in
more than one way, Deirdra.” Brian said. I could hear the bloodlust
in his voice, much like my own, like all of the kindred I knew.
Showing my fear, he delighted in it and pressed on, going for what
he wanted–my body, my blood. Never believing I would ever see such
a horrific scene as my beloved raping me for my body, then my
lifeblood, I was unable to hold back my torment, misery and grief.
I screamed, which echoed along with my mortal self, as he violently
and painfully took my body and blood. I did not want to see this. I
had no need to see this.

Why did I have to witness
this? In an instant it was clear to me as though I had been given
the answer divinely. It was a fear of mine. A fear of making Brian
into what I was, into a vampire. I dreaded the many repercussions
of what might have happened if I did give into my desire to embrace
him. This is what ultimately led me to leave him in the Cambridge
mental hospital.

Once finished with me, he
climbed off and turned to look at me, at my soul. But before
anything was said–if anything was to be said–it began to fade to
black. With a sigh of relief, I was grateful for that episode to be
done with.

With a familiar flash of
light, I imagined myself holding my breath, fearful of what was
next. As I saw the vision become clearer, I wished I was truly able
to exhale this supposed breath. Old memories of life were hard to
kill, as I was finding out first-hand in my own personal
hell.

It was my “angel girl”.
Her flesh was white and waxy. With her head bent forward, her long
mane of dull brown hair fell around her dead, bloated face. As she
walked towards me, her movements jerky and unnatural, she did not
divinely give me the understanding of my existence as it happened
years before. This time she was angry with me for taking her life
and the aura of anger that surrounded her was frightfully strong.
She then began to speak to me, her words backwards like the others
and her voice raspy and gruff.

“You murderer! You are
just an animal, a monster that desires flesh and blood! I will not
give you an excuse to dip your fangs into mortals for your release,
your enjoyment and erotic desire.” Then, unexpectedly she turned
and glared at my incorporeal self.

“You should pay for my
death, for all those you have killed for their blood, but you
won’t. Can’t you hear them? They are calling you. Can’t you feel
it, the pull on your soul?” She then turned and violently reached
out for me. Grabbing firmly onto my hair she pulled my head back
and out of nowhere a dagger appeared in her hands. The blade shone
in the moonlight. She raised her hand, the blade aimed at my
neck…

Abruptly, I was surrounded
by a bright light. I was no longer going to watch my death at the
hands of my angel girl. I was somewhere else now.

“
DEIRDRA!” A group of
muddled voices cried out. I began to feel the pull of what felt
like sleep. I found myself wrapped in a sensation of floating and
then a gentle descending began. It was soft and slow at first, but
quickly turned into a fast spiral descent to only God knew
where.

As the bright light faded
to darkness, I was now falling past an unimaginable number of
souls, bodiless entities, as they cried out to God, or Lucifer, who
ever may be listening. Trapped in torment, they seemed to be in
limbo–not hell as I figured I was.

▪ ▪ ▪ ▪ ▪

I felt my body become
heavier. The cries from the multitude of souls quieted until I
heard none. The darkness that surrounded me began to lighten and I
gradually became aware that I was in a dully-lit room. I felt a
pain that ate at my insides. My body felt as though it weighed a
ton and the sounds around me were muffled. Slowly I opened my
eyes.

Looking up I saw blurred
figures, seven of them, looming over me. Startled by this and
completely confused, I began to fumble on the ground, trying to
rise to my feet. As I was scrambling, I realized I was actually a
physical being again and all I could muster was, “Where am
I?”

Chapter 21

(Stone & Brian -
December 24, 1999)

When Stone awoke, it took
him a few moments to place where he was. Still groggy from slumber,
the events of the past few nights swarmed around his brain, rousing
painful truths. With a sigh, he pulled back the quilt and sat up in
the bed. Looking at the spot where Brenna had been when he fell
into slumber, he saw no evidence of her being with him at all. The
pale yellow blanket was folded and replaced. Stone couldn’t help
but wonder when she had left. Was it that morning or had she just
woken earlier than himself.

Swinging his legs over the
edge of the bed, Stone sat motionless. He couldn’t help but wish
this was all a nightmare and that he was still sleeping. But
reaching into the front pocket of his faded blue jeans, he pulled
out a lock of curly blond hair. As he held the hair, Deirdra’s hair
in his hands, he knew all too well that everything was
real.

When left alone with
Deirdra’s remains the night before, Stone mourned her and cried for
her. Following his desire to have something from Deirdra, he took a
lock of her hair. Fearful of what the others might have thought of
such an act, he told no one. When Elijah had walked in on him,
Stone thought he was going to be caught and be made to return the
lock of hair to its rightful owner. But he was thankful that Elijah
did not see him shove the lock of hair into his pocket and acted as
normal as he could under the circumstances.

Even though Deirdra was
deceased, he still felt an odd connection to her that he couldn’t
explain. He also felt the same connection with the others as well.
He understood them and their nature all too well now. Stone never
thought he could suffer from such emotional ups and downs and to
always have to keep his hunger in check… He never realized what a
struggle it must have been to have mortals near and around them.
His vampire nature, which he was still in awe of, was still
becoming known to him. Stone wasn’t sure if he would ever get a
handle on it and be able to control it and not the other way
around.

Rising to his feet he put
the lock of blond hair back into his pocket and began making his
way out of the bedroom to try and locate the others. Working his
way through the darkened hall to the empty kitchen he paused,
closed his eyes and used his new heightened sense of hearing. He
heard the house creak from the cold outside and the furnace turn
on, but he heard no vampires. When he opened his eyes, he heard a
female voice–it was Eme. Being that her voice was muffled, he
assumed she was in the basement with Adam. With that thought he
cautiously made his way to her.

Rounding the corner he
found the room where he had once been captive. Stone stood by the
doorway, his body half hidden by the wall. With some trepidation,
he peered in. By Eme’s side was Malachi and together they quietly
argued over the resurrection spell. Eme was still voicing her
qualms and relaying her fears of what could go wrong.

“Yes, it may go awry, but
have faith that it will all work to our advantage; to Deirdra’s
advantage.” Malachi said raising his hands to take a caressing hold
on Eme’s face. All Eme could do was sigh having failed at showing
him that his idea was too dangerous.

“Malachi, faith… faith is a
mortal folly.” Eme said with the last bit of fight she had left in
her and let it be. Malachi looked at her as he lowered his hands
until they rested by his side. Turning, he glanced over at his
brother then back at Eme.

“I will need your help. You
are the only one here strong enough with magick other than my dear
brother Khalid.” Malachi said, looking back at Eme, his features
appearing sincere. “If not for yourself, do it for your family. Do
it for Mylana.” He added. As Stone watched him with Eme, he could
see Malachi manipulating her. Eme stayed silent for some time
before nodding her head solemnly in agreement. Just then, Stone
must have made a sound, for they both looked in his
direction.

Embarrassed from being
caught spying, he asked the first question that came to mind,
“Where is everyone else?”

“They are feeding and so
should you.” Malachi said abruptly. Stone stayed silent not knowing
what to say feeling like a scolded child. He was quickly beginning
to question Malachi’s intentions; he felt that something was not
right.

“Yes, you should go and
replenish your strength.” Eme began and looked at Stone with soft,
caring eyes.

“Be quick with it if you
wish to be here for Deirdra’s resurrection.” She paused for a
moment, the look in her eyes changing slightly, just enough to
worry Stone. Then soon enough, Eme finished her thought.

“We are going to attempt
the dark magick tonight and bring her back to us.” Turning her
attention away from Stone she gave Malachi an apprehensive look, as
if silently she still questioned him. Stone could see she was still
uncertain and debated with herself whether it was the right thing
to do. However she did not verbalize her thoughts to Malachi, or
Stone. The decision had been made.

Nodding in agreement to
Eme’s suggestion of feeding, Stone turned and exited the room
without saying a word and made his way out of the basement to the
kitchen. Leaning over the kitchen sink, he looked out the window to
see what vehicles were still there. Seeing that Deirdra’s black
Mustang was the only one left, he opted to use her car. He really
didn’t want to call and wait for a cab or wander around in the cold
looking for his prey. As he turned away from the window, he scanned
the room for the keys, hoping they would be laying about somewhere.
He didn’t want to have to go back to the basement to confront
Malachi.

Spotting the keys on the
kitchen table, a wide grin crossed his face. He was delighted that
he was saved from having to ask for assistance. Swooping up the
keys, he made his way out the back door and to the cold car. While
waiting for the mustang to warm up, his thoughts weaved from
memories of Deirdra to wondering where Brian had gone. Stone
wondered if he was still at the old asylum. As he began to drive
away, he couldn’t help but feel conflicting emotions about
everything that was happening. Still unable to control the highs
and lows of his vampire emotions, he was quickly maddened by his
own thoughts.

It was finally incessant
honking that woke him from his reverie as the traffic lights had
changed from red to green some time ago and Stone hadn’t noticed.
Releasing the brake and pushing on the accelerator, he looked at
his surroundings. Stone realized he hadn’t paid any attention to
where he was heading. He was leaving Montreal and heading in the
direction of the old hospital on the outskirts of the city. His
mind had subconsciously taken over and his need to know if Brian
was still around was more of a drive in him than he ever would have
anticipated. Realizing this, he accepted it and continued driving
to the rundown asylum.

He couldn’t help but worry
about Brian and his already unstable state of mind. With Brian
finding out that Deirdra was alive and in the same city as him,
only to find out she had been murdered, Stone feared the situation
could easily send him over the edge. Stone could see in Brian’s
eyes the intense history they shared together at one time. Although
Stone was curious as to why their lives together were severed so
many years ago, Stone did not intrude his questions upon him. He
would have to be patient and learn what he could as the days,
weeks, months and years passed by.

Putting the car into park,
he let the engine idle as he looked at the single lit window on the
second floor. Stone was relieved to see that Brian was there and
oddly enough, he was surprised to feel slight excitement in seeing
him again. He climbed out of the vehicle and into the cold night.
Anxiously he walked up the cement pathway and through the front
entrance.

Standing before Brian’s
room door, he stood stock-still and listened to his mumbled ranting
and raving, which he found disturbing but also broke Stone’s
heart.

“You are not her, none of
you are her! Oh, you may smell beautiful, move gracefully and have
lovely blond curly hair like her, but you are not my Deirdra!”
Stone knew instantly that was why Brian was always drawn to blondes
as his victims. It was beginning to make some sense.

“I thought I was rid of
you, rid of all of you! Get out of my head. Out! Out! Out!” Brian
cried out. Stone then heard the distinct sound of flesh being
beating upon–he had begun smacking his head violently with his
fist. Stone had heard enough. He was going to stop Brian from
harming himself. Barging in, Stone saw Brian sitting on the edge of
the single sized hospital bed, his body bent forward. Looking up as
Stone entered, a trickle of blood escaped the cut above his brow
from his incessant pounding. Blood tears welled in his eyes and a
look of shame changed his features.

“Don’t do this to yourself,
Brian.” Stone said in a soft tone, he didn’t want to be overly
intrusive.

Lowering his head, Brian
spoke, his words broken by his sobs, “Why did I have to meet you? I
would have preferred being left to wonder if she were still alive,
rather than knowing that she wasn’t and that I had missed my time
with her altogether.”