Retribution (22 page)

“Yo, how the fuck you gonna keep me outta my own motherfuckin' house, huh? Fuck outta here! That's my muthafuckin' paper up in that muhfucka! I paid for that shit, yo! I'll have that muthafucka burned to the muthafuckin' ground 'fore I let you move another muhfucka up in shit I fuckin' paid for! You hear me, yo?! I'll burn that bitch down wit'
you
in it. Don't fuck wit' me, yo! Ya heard?!”

My heart catches in my throat, but I don't let him hear it in my voice. “Oh, well, nigga. Do what you gotta do. It's in
my
name, free and clear. Isn't it? So, you don't have claims to shit. Not over on Canterbury Lane you don't. ”

“Say what, yo?! You wanna play dirty, huh, Pasha?! Is that how you really fuckin' doin' it, now?! You wanna be on some bitch shit ‘n' fuckin' snake me after all the shit I've done for ya stupid ass? After e'ery muthafuckin' thing we've been through, yo. Fuck you, man! You ain't shit, Pasha. Real shit, yo! I want all the paper in them safes, yo.”

“Safes?”
I say, feigning ignorance. “I only know about
one
safe. Where's this other one at?”

“Fuck outta here! Don't worry 'bout all that. Let me come get my shit. And I want my shit outta your muthafuckin' bank accounts, too. You hear me? I want my shit by tomorrow, Pasha! All of it! E'ery muthafuckin' dime!”

I sigh. I hear Booty's voice in my head.
“Fish this nigga, goddammit!”

“Okay, Jasper, you want your money? Fine. You want to come back into the house? Then it's going to cost you. I want answers, nigga. First, I want to know:
did
you fuck Felecia? And don't fucking lie, nigga.”

He sucks his teeth. “Fuck, yo! You really wanna do this shit? Just drop it, aiight.”

“Nigga, I'm not dropping shit. And I'm not giving you
shit
—not one fucking dime—
unless
you tell me what I wanna know.”

“Are you fuckin' serious, yo?”

“Nigga, you got five seconds to start talking before you get the dial tone.”

He blows a heavy breath into the phone. “You bein' a real fuckin' bitch, yo. You know that, right?”

“Oh well. Buckle up, nigga, ‘cause you haven't seen shit,
yet
. Now
did
you fuck that bitch or not?”

“Hell, no, I ain't fuck her bird-ass. That bitch is a snitch. What I look like fuckin' wit' a weak-ass bitch like that? All that bitch ever did was
suck
my dick, lick on these balls, and eat these nuts out. And the bitch couldn't even make a nigga's toes curl. Bitch can't even hold a dick down in her throat. All she did was swallow my nuts ‘n' I hit her ass wit' some product ‘n' paper for keepin' tabs on ya ass. Bitch wanna be
you
so fuckin' bad.”

I blink.

“That bitch didn't give a fuck about you, yo. Desperate bitch wanted ya spot like crazy. She came at me wit' the shit, aiight. I
ain't tryna dry-snitch the bitch out but it is what it is. She shot me a kite while I was behind the wall ‘n' put me on to you, yo. She wanted me to put her on my visitin' list ‘n' I did.”

I feel myself about to choke on my anger as he tells me how she'd drive down to Southwoods Prison to see him, then tell him all this shit about me. Eventually he started letting her suck his dick. That fucking dirty bitch was sucking him in the goddamn visiting room! As I listen, I'm squeezing the phone so tight that it starts cutting off the circulation in my hand.

“I ain't want you to know. But fuck it! You tryna fuck wit' my paper. I want my shit, yo. So it is what it is.”

I take a deep breath. Steady my nerves. “Well, since you're
finally
telling the truth about something, if that
is
the truth. Tell me this: were
you
behind having the windows smashed out of my salon and car?” He says he wasn't. Says he didn't know shit about it popping off until Felecia texted him. I ask him if he was the nigga who had me attacked that night in the yard. He tells me no. Tells me he heard that shit from Felecia, too.

I feel sick to my stomach.

That dirty bitch! If I thought I could get away with it, I'd fucking kill her!

“Ya own fuckin' fam snaked you, aiight. You satisfied? Now let me get my shit, yo!”

I swallow the thick lump in my throat. I fight to keep my anger from getting the best of me. “Give me the names of the niggas who you had kidnap and attack me and you can have every dime of your money back. And I'll even sign over the house to you.”

“Yo, you fuckin' buggin' now. Fuck that. What the fuck I look like puttin' them niggas out like that?! Fuck outta here, yo! You already know it was me behind it ‘n' shit. So that's all you need to know, period. You don't need to know shit else.”

I take another deep breath. I knew this nigga wasn't going to make it easy. “Then suit yourself. But understand this, Jasper: I'm not giving you a motherfucking thing. Whatever's in those
safes
you speak of you
won't
ever get your hands on if I can help it. And the money in my money market accounts, chalk it up as a loss, nigga. I
know
you. And you
know
I know what kind of weight you're pushing out there. You're far from broke. And you and I
both
know you have shit stashed all over the fucking place. So I'm not giving
you
shit unless I get those names—
all
of them. And I mean it. Otherwise, you better go hit up one of the stash houses you have scattered all over the place, and reup your stacks. Bottom line, I'm done, nigga. And I'm done with
you.”

He snaps. “Yo, fuck outta here wit' that shit! Ain't shit done, bitch, 'less I say it is, ya heard?! You must really wanna be out there whorin' again, is that it?! You stay showin' ya ass, yo! Let me find out who the muhfucka is you creepin' wit'! I'ma dead that shit, yo! Real shit, Pasha! You don't know
who
the fuck you fuckin' wit', yo! Shit ain't sweet! I
thought
I taught ya whore-ass a lesson the last time you crossed me! What I gotta do this time, huh?!”

I fight to keep calm. I refuse to get into a screaming match with this nigga. “Do whatever you want, Jasper. You're right. There isn't shit sweet about what's about to go down, nigga. So don't get it twisted. I
know
exactly whom I'm
fucking
with. You're the nigga who had me tied up down in some basement, sucking a string of niggas' dicks. You're the nigga who then came down and beat the shit out of me. Then had your goons toss my body in a park. You left me for dead, nigga.

“So yeah, I know
exactly
who you are. You're the same crazy nigga who married this
whore
. And you wanna know why
you
still married a bitch who
you knew
was sucking a buncha niggas' dicks
behind your goddamn back while you were in prison? I'ma tell you, nigga. Because ya ass is crazy for this deep throat. This throat pussy is like crack, and you know it, nigga. And this hot, wet pussy between my legs is deep and tight. That's why you still married this
slut-ass whore,
nigga! Your ass is strung out and crazy for this good shit. Always have been, always will be.”

I can practically feel the fire shooting out of his nostrils. Can see him balling his fists. “Yo, you think this shit's funny, huh, Pasha?! Fuckin' bitch! You think I can't get at you, huh, Pasha?! Is that it, yo?! You think some fuckin' piece of paper is gonna keep me away from you?! Fuck outta here, yo! The only reason ya ass is still breathin' is 'cause I want you to! And don't think I won't be stoppin' by
Nana's
as soon as my shit gets right ‘n' I can walk to have a lil talk wit' her!
Don't
fuck wit' me, Pasha!”

My heart drops. “Jasper, stay the fuck away from her! Do you hear me, motherfucker?! I mean it! Stay the
fuck
away from my grandmother! I swear to you! If something
ever
happens to her, I will personally unload a clip in your motherfucking head!”

I hang up on his ass. But the nigga calls back. Then calls the salon's line when I don't pick up my cell.
“Whaaat,
Jasper?!
Stop
fucking calling me, or I will call the police and have you arrested for fucking harassing me!”

“Real shit, Pasha,” he says calmly, “you gonna fuck 'round ‘n' have me put a bullet in ya shit.”

The line goes dead.

There's no repentance for being a snitch, only having your tongue cut out…

“Y
ou gonna fuck 'round ‘n' have me put a bullet in ya shit.”
I fall back in my seat. It isn't until I remove the phone from my ear, clutching it in my hand, that I realize that I'm shaking. My cell buzzes in my hand causing me to jump.
This nigga has my fucking nerves rattled.
I glance at the caller ID, breathing out a sigh of relief, quickly answering the call.

“Hi, Nana,” I say, happy to hear her voice. I close my eyes.

“Hey, baby.” Hearing my seventy-two-year-old grandmother's warm, soothing voice warms causes a tear to roll down my cheek. I quickly wipe it away. I ask her how she is. “The good Lord woke me up this morning, and spared me another day. I am truly blessed.”

“You sure are. That's a blessing.” I blink back tears.

“It sure is.
My
God is truly in the blessing business. He's an awesome God. Amen. And He's been mighty good to you, Pasha.”

Oh, no. Please. Not today, Nana.
“I know He has, Nana.”

“Uh-huh. Then why have you forsaken Him?” Inhale. All it takes is a pregnant pause for her to start up. “Seems like you're too busy tryna keep up with the devil these days. You need to get right with God. Put Him first. And stop letting the devil have his way.”

Exhale. “Nana, I'm a work in progress. God knows my heart.”

“Uh-huh. We're in the last days, Pasha. When the pearly gates finally open…”

I cut her off. “Nana, I love you very much.”

“And I love you. But you
need
to love the Lord more.”

I sigh. “Nana, as much as I'd love to stay on the phone and fellowship with you, I have to make this real quick.” I tell her my reason for calling. “If Jasper happens to stop over, please do me a favor and do
not
let
him
or
anyone
else who comes to the door that doesn't look familiar to you inside. Don't even open the door for them. I want you to immediately call the police.”

She wants to know why. I tell her I've put him out; that I have a restraining order against him—and she's listed as someone Jasper's to have no contact with; that I'm worried about her being in that house all by herself. I try to convince her to let me send her on a vacation for a few weeks. Try to encourage her to visit her niece, Penny—my cousin Persia and her sisters' aunt—and her family out in Arizona. But Nana isn't hearing it.

“Chile, hush. I'm not going anywhere. When you live by faith, you aren't moved by fear. You know I stay armed and ready. I'm covered in the blood of Jesus. The Lord's armor will protect me from any wickedness. In the name of Jesus. In the name of Jesus. In the
name…
of Jesus. Amen.”

“Nana, please,” I plead. “If you don't want to go for a few weeks, then go for a week.”

“Baby, I walk through the valley of the shadow of death…I fear no…”

I see she's not budging, see there's no convincing her. I let it go. “I know you do, Nana. Anyway, I'm going to let you go, okay? I only wanted to let you know what's going on with me and to check on you.”

“Thanks, baby. I'm glad to hear you're finally letting that husband of yours go. You know I've never fancied Jasper. But I'm a good Christian woman with an open and loving heart. So I have loved him best I can.” She grunts. “You and Felecia have always been stubborn when it comes to them street thugs. Just like your mothers. You girls love them heathen men; especially you, Pasha.”

I sigh.
I knew this shit was coming.
“Nana, please. Let's not go there. I'm
nothing
like her, or my mother.”

“Mmmph. I'm leaving it all up on the altar. I don't know what happened to you while you were missing. But you haven't been right since, Pasha. Whatever them filthy heathens did to my sweet baby has changed you. I wish you'd give it to God. Your spirit is heavy. And them beautiful eyes don't have that sparkle in 'em like they used to, baby. I wish you'd come to church. Let me have Pastor lay hands on you. Let him shake the devil and his serpents out of your life. You need to get right with God, Pasha. Let Him heal your spirit before it's too late. Please, baby. Do it for your Nana, and that precious baby of yours.”

I feel myself starting to tear up. “I will, Nana, soon.”

“Uh-huh. Soon it'll be too late, baby. I know I can't tell you what to do 'cause you grown. But I'm telling you this, baby. Jasper's spirit isn't right. It's never been right. And he's gotta hold on you.”

You have no idea.

“I'll fuckin' kill you, yo…to teach you a lesson…don't have me fuck you up, yo…you stay wantin' me to beat ya ass, yo…”
Jasper's voice plays over and over in my head, his threats churning a hole into my memory.

I feel myself getting sick. I dab at my eyes to keep the tears from falling.

“Anyway, baby. Felecia was here this morning and told me you
and her had a big falling-out and you done fired her from the salon. She's all broken up behind that. Now I hear you're fighting her unemployment. Tell me this isn't so? You know my heart can't stand hearing none of this mess.”