Revue (23 page)

***

Em and Brad would not shut up during the drive from the airport to our hotel in Surfer’s Paradise, whereas Josh and I were participating in a battle of mutual silent treatment. We really needed to talk, but first thing was first … Em-time.

“This room is so funky! Check out these flip-flops in a bag on the wall. And oh my God, is that a cocky lamp?” she skipped over to the hideous white lamp next to the TV.

“It’s horrid and gave me the creeps,” I said with a shudder. “I unplugged it.”

“Don’t be so mean. Poor cocky.” She stroked the fucking thing as if it were real.

“I swear it’s possessed. Come on, put it back and come and tell me what’s been happening.” I patted the mattress beside me.

Em sat the lamp down and plugged it in.
No fucking way is that thing being turned on tonight. I will test its flying capabilities before that happens.

“Don’t worry about what’s been happening with me,” she said, crossing her legs and raising her hand, creating an
O
shape with her thumb and forefinger. “A big fat zero, that’s what. I want to know what’s been happening with
you.
You and that beast you’re fucking.”

“Who says I’m fucking him?”

“Oh please,” she droned, rolling her eyes. “It’s written all over your vagina.”

I laughed. “Okay, okay. I’ve fucked Josh … once.”

“Annnnd?”

“And I’m in love with him.”

“Wow! He must have the cock of the century.”

I flopped back on the bed, recalling that night we’d had sex and seeing his beautifully big, glistening monster.

“Yeah, he does. But that’s not it.”

“No? Well good. I’d hate to think you’d become
that
shallow after only a month.”

I couldn’t hold it in any longer and completely broke down, covering my face with my hands and ugly-crying every emotion I’d sustained since meeting Josh. “I hate him and I love him. He makes me so angry and so happy. I laugh and I cry. I kiss and I punch. He hurts me and then fixes me. He touches me and cuts me. He leaves me so fucking raw and bare, Em.”

The bed moved just slightly and I felt her head lay on my chest and her arm hug me tight. “Cori, honey, that sounds wonderful.”

“It is and it isn’t. When he hurts me, he kills me.”

She lifted one of my fingers so that she could see my eye. “But does he bring you back to life?”

I stared at her sanguine expression. “Yes.”

“Then live him—breathe him. Set boundaries and enjoy staying within them together. You can’t compare all relationships to what you had with Steve. What you guys shared was controlled, safe …
suffocating
. Your days with him were set out before you. You both walked that knowing-line and never deviated. That’s not what love is, Cori. Love is being spun around on the spot, really fast, and then trying to walk a straight line after been slapped in the face with a wet fish. Love is and should be spontaneous and exciting.”

“I fucked Brad to get back at him,” I blurted out. “Is that love?”

She sat up on her elbow. “He hurt you real bad, huh? You’d never dream of doing a thing like that unless he seriously fucked you over.”

“He broke me, Em. Into a million little pieces.”

“Did he put you back together again?”

“Not yet. But he wants to.”

She smiled. “Then fucking let him. Let the bastard glue you back together.”

I, too, sat up and rested on my elbows. “I am. Starting from today.”

***

Later that night, we all had dinner at the hotel, followed by drinks at the bar.  Brad and Em—and Noah—were getting along like a house on fire. And watching all three of them converse inspired the need to get comfy with a bowl of popcorn.

Priceless viewing.

Giggling, I sipped my Malibu and Coke and whispered quietly to Josh. “Em is definitely going to have her hands full with those boys.”

I wasn’t worried though. I had no doubt she’d handle it, not to mention thoroughly enjoy the game. Em was a harmless tease … most of the time.

Taking another sip, the luscious scent that was Josh seduced my sense of smell when he leaned against me. “Want to go for a walk to the beach,” he murmured into my ear, his breath against my neck, paralysing.

My eyelids fluttered and I licked my lips. “Sure,” I breathed out.

He stood and placed his hand in mine, guiding me to stand with a look I’d never seen him wear before. And my God did he wear it well. The crinkle in the corners of his hooded brown eyes, together with the near blinding gleam of his pearly-white smile had me tilting my head, curiously.

Josh, noticing my uncertainty, winked then led me out of the hotel and down to the beach, which was only one hundred or so metres away. The warm Autumn air was perfect, a hint of salty sea life passing under my nose as it blew the leaves of the Pandanus trees lining the beach. Waves crashed into the shore, and the distant sound of traffic grew quieter and quieter as we approached the sand.

Stopping at the edge of the path, I balanced on Josh’s steady arm and removed my heels.

“Want me to carry you, Sweetheart?”

“No, thank you,” I said with a smile, crooking my neck to look up at him while balancing on one foot. “I like the feel of sand between my toes.”

“How ‘bout the feel of my tongue between your toes?” He waggled his eyebrows.

“Ew! No!” I hit him on the arm. “I like the feel of your tongue elsewhere.”

Groaning, he dragged said tongue up the side of my neck, sending through me a shiver so delightfully warm that my toes curled into the sand.

“Mm… I miss your taste,” he murmured, nudging my ear. “It’s fucking killing me.”
Oh God, I miss your taste, too! I miss your everything.

Groaning some more, he laced my fingers with his, and we stepped onto the beach and found a cozy little spot in among some sand dunes. Josh sat and pulled me down to rest in between his powerful legs, bear-hugging me with his strong arms. He really was the most wonderful human blanket alive.

Silence took hold as we sat and absorbed the serenity of being in each other’s arms without so much as a care in the world.

It was perfect. Just us.

“I’m sorry, sweetheart,” he said, breaking the silence and squeezing me tighter. “But you need to know something.”

I tensed.

Bye bye, perfect.

“I never fucked those two women from last night.”

My heart rate increased and confusion washed over me in waves, just like the ones hitting the shore in front of us. Yet he continued. “I couldn’t do it. I didn’t want to.”

Stunned.

… speechless.

I didn’t know what to think, let alone say. I was a mixed bag of emotional lollies, the assortment of flavours ranging from guilty-grape to relieved-raspberry. There was even a confused-caramel and sickly-strawberry among the bunch. Choosing one, I proverbially stuck guilty-grape in my mouth and sucked hard. I deserved that emotion for sleeping with Brad.

When I didn’t say anything, he continued, releasing one hand and moving my hair away from my neck to rest his chin on my shoulder. “I just thought you ought to know. That’s all. I don’t want to keep any secrets from you.”

I nodded. “Where’d you go then?”

He gently kissed the back of my neck and murmured into my skin. “I spent the night at a bar with Chief, talking about … stuff.”

The feel of his soft, delicate lips had my eyelids fluttering until they fell closed. “Oh,” I sighed. “What stuff?”

“That after this tour is finished, I’m done.”

What?

I shuffled in his arms like a beetle stuck on its back, I broke our glorious position so that I could kneel before him in the sand and get a better look at his face. “No! No way!”

“Hey! This is what I want,” he said, grabbing my arms and holding me still.

“Josh, no! You love performing. I don’t want you to stop because of me. I’d never forgive myself.”

“It’s got nothing to do with you,” he said, calmly, bringing my wrist to his lips and gently nibbling my skin. “Okay, it does. But honestly, Corinne, I’ve been thinking about it for a while. I’ve just never had a
real
reason to give it all up.”

“But … but—”

“Hear me out,” he interrupted, pulling me closer to him.

I inched forward on my knees then lowered my arse to rest on the back of my heels, surrendering. “Okay. Let me have it.”

“I’ve lived this lifestyle for the past six years. When I was younger, it was fun. Took my mind off things …”

His eyes spoke of sadness, so I inched forward a little more and raised my hand to touch his face, knowing the rejection by his parents was why his eyes projected that particular emotion. Josh playfully nipped at my hand and pulled me the final distance to sit, straddled on his lap, my arms resting on his shoulders, my hands settling in his hair.

“… it’s just not me, sweetheart. Fucking whoever wanted to fuck me was fun when I didn’t know any better. I now know better. Having you in my life has showed me ‘better’.”

I dipped my head and kissed his lips, sliding my tongue into his mouth and savouring the man in my arms. The man who’d just admitted I was his exception.

Josh gripped my shoulders possessively and held me tight. His cock hardened, causing the most delicious sensation as it rubbed against the cotton of my underwear. I couldn’t help myself and rocked, gifting us both the friction we craved.

We both let out an amorous moan. “I need you,” I said, grinding against him, harder.

Josh’s tongue danced passionately in my mouth, his light sweeping grazes quickly turning into strong, dominant, and hungry strokes, bordering desperation. His breathing was ragged, his hands moving to cradle my head and shoulders as he flipped me onto my back. Settling me gently, he hovered, his fingertips teasing their way down my thigh only to trail back up again, pushing the hem of my dress along with them.

“Josh,” I gasped, as he played with the seam of my underwear, gripping it tightly and pulling it down my legs.

He eyed me heatedly. “Fuck, I need you on the tip of my tongue right now,” he groaned, almost painfully, as if it hurt him to have to wait a second longer. I felt his pain—it was hurting me too, having to endure the seconds that ticked by as he shuffled to his knees and removed my underwear completely.

The silver gleam of the moon bounced off his face, highlighting his left cheek and lips, a clear hungered smile visible as he positioned himself between my legs. The feel of his hands running up and down my thighs evoked warmth to flow right through me, my hips rising to meet his mouth, my breathing to spike, and my fingers to slide into his hair, gripping it tightly as I pulled his head into me.

Fuck the sand. And fuck the fact that anyone could catch us. I didn’t care. Right now, it was all about Josh and me, me and Josh. Right now, the rest of the world didn’t exist. It was just this moment: the stars and the eavesdropping breeze. Just his head between my legs, his eyes on mine, his lips on … mine.

Yes, fuck the sand and the rest of the world.

Wet heat laved my pussy as his tongue stroked my skin over and over, his hungry motions making me buck into his face for want of nothing more than what he made me feel. Euphoric,
powerless
… complete. I’d never felt that way in my life.

“Josh, I love you,” I whispered, thrashing my head from side to side while gripping his hair tightly. “I love your tongue. I love your hands. I … I … oh my God!” I cried out, as said tongue flicked my clit and his hands worked their magic.

My fingers released his hair, my arms falling to my sides, limp. I arched my back and let out a breath as he worked my orgasm from an explosive burst to a delicious hum.
Good God!

“I love you too, sweetheart. I love you here in my arms, where you should be.” His lips touched mine, so I delicately dipped my tongue into his mouth, tasting the two of us simultaneously.

Divine.

Reaching down, I undid his buckle, unzipped his pants and pulled out his hard, warm cock. The groan that left his mouth, vibrated through his chest into mine.

So animalistic.

I loved it
.

Sliding my hand and fingers over his silky skin, I thumbed a bead of pre-cum over his crown before sucking my thumb into my mouth.

His cock twitched and his eyes flared. “Open your legs, Corinne.”

They were open, so I smiled.

“Wider!” he growled, my smile vanishing when he gently lifted my pelvis and guided himself inside me.

I stretched as much as possible and gasped at his penetration.
Fuck me, he’s hard and deep!

Slow, long thrusts—in and out, in and out. Fingers biting into my hips—in and out, in and out. The sounds of crashing waves and heavy breathing—in and out, in and out. His skin slapping mine—in and out, in and out.