Revved Up Hearts (24 page)

“What if what?” he asked
her.

All of the air was suddenly sucked out of her lungs. She couldn’t breathe, much less answer the question.
Oh God, help me
, she thought. Why had she started this? She could feel the tears welling up in her
eyes.

“What if what?” he asked again. This time his voice begged her for an
answer.

“What if I lost you!” she exclaimed as her head snapped up to face him. She could feel the hot tears running down her face.
No turning back now
, she realized. “Ever since I met you, I have been coming up with all these reasons to keep you at a distance. My ex-fiancé broke my heart. What would the girls in my youth group say if I acted opposite of how I had taught them? But all the while, you kept chipping away at all my defenses. You let me know how you felt, but I kept pushing you away. But at some point, you must’ve gotten through because the thought of you being seriously hurt or killed scared me to death. The truth is that I can’t imagine my life without you in it,” she finished as she turned back to look at the lake and wipe her eyes. Now that the sun had gone down, the cool night air was moving in. She shivered slightly, but the relief at saying how she felt warmed her. Now she only had to wait for his
reaction.

She didn’t have to wait long. She felt his hand cup her chin and gently pull it toward him. She looked at him and he smiled. “I want to look into your eyes, your beautiful blue eyes, when I say this.” She saw a tear in the corner of his eye. “What took you so long? I have never liked a girl the way I like you. I had noticed you before the incident with the toolbox. I thought you were so pretty. I could tell that you were looking for something. I was going to help you just as an excuse to talk to you. I’m not sure if the toolbox thing helped me or hurt me.” He paused to wipe a tear from her cheek before continuing. “I have never chased a woman the way I have with you. I never had to. Usually, a girl falls victim to my charm at the first attempt.” They both laughed at his joke. “The fact that you didn’t drove me crazy. A couple of times I wanted to walk away, but I couldn’t. Don’t you know that you had me hooked from day
one?”

“No, I didn’t,” she answered as she reached up to place a palm on his cheek and caress his face. He took a moment to close his eyes and enjoy the feeling. He looked at her once more and
continued.

“I don’t know if you fully realize it or not, but you have changed me. I told you once that I had been raised in church but that I got away from it after my sister died. Since I met you, I have been reading my Bible again. When I told my mom that I went back to chapel, she cried. I admit that I went for the wrong reason—to spend time with you—but once I was there, I really listened. It all started coming back to me, and I knew I had to get back to
God.”

“Oh, Jeremiah, that’s wonderful!” Dawn exclaimed, and new tears welled up in her
eyes.

“I’m not where I need to be, but I’m working on it,” he said. “I was reading in Matthew the other day where it talked about a ‘pearl of great price.’ It made me think of you. The man in the story sold everything he had to buy the pearl because it was so valuable. You are that valuable to me. I would do anything for you. The next Sunday that we don’t race, I want you to go to church with me. I want you to be there when I rededicate my life to
God.”

“Jeremiah, you can’t do it for
me.”

“I know, and I’m not. I know that I’m a sinner and that Christ died for me. I’ve always known that, but I wanted to control my own life. I didn’t really trust him because of what happened to Elizabeth. But I see how you live your life, in total submission to him, and I see the joy and peace you have. I recognize that it is because you have given God control of your life, and he has given you those things. I want the same. I know that I’m headed down the wrong road and I’m headed to the wrong place. I’m ready to change
direction.”

“Then don’t wait, Jeremiah,” Dawn begged. “Don’t you remember that the Bible says that we are not promised another second. Your life and the risks you take every time you get in that car should remind you of
that.”

“You’re right,” he said as he grasped both of her hands in his. “Will you pray with
me?”

“Of course.” She smiled at him before bowing her
head.

He bowed his head and prayed. “Dear Lord Jesus, thank you for this day. Thank you for this wonderful Christian woman that you’ve sent into my life. I know that she is here for me. She has taught me so much and reminded me of so much. She’s reminded me that I am a sinner and that I need you in my life. I know that you came down out of heaven and died on the cross to pay the penalty for my sins. I know that I have to accept that gift from you, and I accept it now. Please forgive me of my sins, Jesus. I know that I can’t do it without you. I know that without you I’ll be separated from you in hell forever. I don’t want that, Father. I want to spend eternity in heaven with you. Forgive me, and cleanse me, Lord. I give everything that I have and everything that I am to you. I start my life over right now. Lord, please be with me every minute of every day. And Lord, if it is your will, please let this beautiful, wonderful, perfect woman stay in my life. I want to grow with her. I want her to continue to teach me more and more. I love you, Father. Thank you again for everything. Amen.”

When he had finished, they looked up at each other and smiled. They both had tears in their eyes. “How do you feel?” she asked
him.

He answered as he squeezed her hands. “I feel lighter. It’s almost like I’ve had a race car sitting on my chest for a long time, and it has been removed. I can breathe. I have a peace that I haven’t felt in a long
time.”

“Oh, Jeremiah!” she said. It was hard to speak because of the way she was feeling. She wanted to shout. Instead, she grabbed him and hugged him. “That’s God. He has already entered your heart and has begun working. He’s doing what you asked him to do. He’s cleansing you, taking all that dirty sin away and replacing it with his love and peace and
grace.”

“I know. I never want this feeling to end. I feel so innocent and free! I can’t wait to tell Dad. Mom is going to
cry.”

“Tell them. Tell as many people as you can about what happened to you today. You need to tell those who will support you in this. You need people who will pray with you and that will be able to answer any questions you may have. You also need to tell those who may not support you. There will be some who will ridicule you and try to get you back on the old path. It won’t be easy. You may find out that they weren’t really your friends. Be prepared to lose those
friends.”

“Okay,” he said. “Any more
advice?”

“Yeah. Keep reading your Bible. Finish Matthew, and then read the rest of the gospels. These will give you a first-person view of Jesus’s life. Get to know him. Read your Bible, and pray every day. Pray before you read and as you read. Pray that God will help you understand his Word. Don’t be afraid or ashamed to ask questions if you don’t understand. I’ll be more than happy to help you in any way that I can. Do you
understand?”

“I do. Thanks again for everything. There is no way to express how I really feel. There’s no way to pay you back for everything that you’ve done for
me.”

They went inside so that Jeremiah could call his parents. He called his mom first, and she sobbed uncontrollably. She said that she was so happy. She couldn’t wait to see Jeremiah in person so that she could hug him. She also said she wanted to meet this woman who had brought along the answer to a mother’s prayer. Jeremiah tried to hand the phone to Dawn, but she wouldn’t take it. Dawn said there would be time for that later. This time was for mother and son. Then Jeremiah called his dad. He did shout. His dad admitted that he never should have let his teenage son drift away from God, but he couldn’t exactly make Jeremiah go to church when he wasn’t going himself. He had been praying for this day ever since he had gotten back into a right relationship with God several years
ago.

When Jeremiah hung up with his dad, he led Dawn back into the kitchen. Together, they opened every beer that Jeremiah had in the fridge and poured them down the sink. Jeremiah vowed to never drink again. From there, they went into the entertainment room and got every dirty movie off the shelves and put them in a box. Dawn waited as Jeremiah ran upstairs. He came back with a stack of girlie magazines and threw them in the box with the movies. He told Dawn where in the pantry to find the matches and charcoal starter. He carried the box out to the deck and to the BBQ pit. They sat for a long time and watched those items burn. Then they went inside for Bible study. They decided to start with Matthew and read the New Testament together. Dawn finally left around midnight. After all, they both had to go to work in the
morning.

Bryan was waiting for Dawn when she arrived at work on Tuesday. She told him everything, and when she was done, he shouted “Hallelujah!” Then he grabbed her into one of the tightest bear hugs she had ever felt. He let her go when she told him that she couldn’t breathe. She laughed. “This is fantastic!” he exclaimed. “I was sitting here hoping you would tell me that you two were officially dating. I never expected this. This is great. Wait until I tell Valerie. She’s going to scream.” Dawn laughed again as Bryan walked toward his office. “Wahoo!” she heard right before his door
closed.

Dawn couldn’t wait to call her mom to tell her what had happened. She wanted to call last night but knew that her mom went to bed early. Dawn sat at her desk and dialed home. She thought her mom wasn’t going to answer, but she picked up right before Dawn hung
up.

“Hello,” was her mom’s breathless
answer.

“Hi, Mom. I know this is a bad time ’cause you’re running your daycare right now, but I just had to call
you.”

“It’s okay. You know that you can call me anytime. We were outside playing, and I had to run inside to get the phone. That’s why I sound like I’m out of breath.” Dawn could tell that her mom was walking back outside with the cordless phone. She heard the back door open, and she could hear kids playing in the background. Once she knew that her mom was sitting down, Dawn told her the whole story. “Praise the Lord!” her mother said when Dawn finished. “I am so happy that you are doing the Lord’s work where you are. I worried so much when you moved away because you were still hurting so badly. But I knew that you loved the Lord and wouldn’t let anything turn you from him. I have prayed every day for your safety and for the Lord’s will in your life. This is an answer to prayer.” Dawn could hear the emotion in her mother’s
voice.

“I know, Mom. I know that it is. And you know what else? I think that Jeremiah may be the one. I know what you are going to say, I thought Kevin was the one, and look what happened. But I really think God caused all that to happen so that I would move here and find Jeremiah. He even has a biblical
name.”

“Maybe you are right. I’ll keep praying for you and Jeremiah. Kevin called again last night. He said he was close to giving up on you. Now you call me with this news. Maybe it’s a
sign.”

“It could be because for the first time the news that he called looking for me doesn’t hurt. I can honestly say that I feel nothing anymore.” Dawn wanted to talk to her mom more, but the sound of a fight in the background told her that the call was about to
end.