Rewind (18 page)

“I thought it was just because he was under stress…”

“Christ Syd, I don’t beat on your mom when I’m stressed out.”  He tried to say without yelling.  He took a long drink of beer, “It’s never okay to be abusive to your partner, sure there’s been times that your mom’s made me so mad I wanted to ring her neck but I never have.” 

“Hey now!” Mom chimed in as she walked into the kitchen and sat down at the table. 

“What?  You’ve got a bitch streak a mile wide in you and you’re stubborn as hell kind of like somebody else I know.”  He laughed softly then looked at her, “But I’d never hurt you, I’d never put my hands on you.  I wouldn’t be able to live with myself if I did.”

“Aww you really do
love
me.”  Mom said trying to lighten the mood. 

“And that’s why I would never do anything to hurt you.”  He stated matter of factly then looked at me.  “What’s up with you and Cade?”

I shrugged a shoulder, “We’re friends, I feel safe when I’m around him.”

“You’re a big girl and you’re old enough to make your own choices, all I’m going to say is be careful.  Cade had a rough childhood, that’s his story to tell, but just be careful.  That’s all I have to say about whatever is going on or not going on between you two.” 

“How long do I have to stay here?”

Dad laughed, “It won’t kill you to stay here for a week or two will it?  We aren’t that bad are we?”

I felt bad, “No, no, that’s not it at all but my computer and everything is at my house.”

“I’ll have one of the guys meet you tomorrow so you can go get a few things.  Just keep your eyes peeled for Ronnie.  Try not to leave work alone, have Ryan or Theresa or somebody there with you at all times.  I know that sounds extreme but I can almost guarantee you if he seen you at Cade’s he’s probably boiling mad.”

“Oh god what if he tries to hurt Cade?”  I said with worry.

Dad laughed, “Trust me when I say you don’t have to worry about that happening.”

~~~~

“Cade dropped your car off this morning.”  Mom told me when I walked into the kitchen. 

“Oh, okay.  Did he leave a bill?”  I hadn’t talked to him since the last time we talked in his pickup.  I would text him but he never replied or called. 

“I don’t think so, I think your dad paid him.”  She said and put a plate of breakfast food on the table.  I pulled my phone out of my purse and sent Cade a simple,
Thank you
, text. 

Dad walked through the front door and over to the table, as we ate breakfast we talked about how business was going at the gym.  Mom was beaming from ear to ear with a smile, “You’re great at what you do.  I’m so glad everything is going good, you worked hard to get to where you are.”

I smiled, “I love helping the kids, some have such a low self-esteem it breaks my heart.  They’ve learned they can talk to us about anything anytime.” 

Dad sat there quiet, “We can’t find him anywhere, it’s like he’s vanished.  A couple of the guys have been to his parent’s house, his mom was tight lipped and lying through her teeth.” 

“Wow, do you think maybe those charges finally came through?  Maybe he’s in jail?”

Dad shook his head ‘no’, “Nope, his record is spotless, we’ve checked the jails too.  His step daddy must have got the DA to drop everything.” 

“Maybe he…hell I don’t know what to say to that.”  I was truly baffled.  “I could unblock him from my phone.  If he calls or text I can tell you and you can track him.”

“I’ll think about it, don’t do that just yet.” Dad said. 

“How much do I owe Cade?”  I asked changing the subject? 

Dad shrugged, “He wouldn’t let me pay him or tell me how much it cost.” 

I left for work and tried to call Cade but he didn’t answer so I left him a voicemail hoping that he would call back. I missed hearing his voice, I just missed him—everything about him. 

The week was busy as usual, by Friday I was actually frustrated that Cade was obviously ignoring me so after Theresa and I got in our vehicles instead of going back to my parents’ house I left to go to Cade’s.  I pulled up the long gravel driveway and parked beside his pickup.  I rang the doorbell three times before I finally gave up, when I turned to go back to my car I seen the walk in door to one of the garages was open.  The closer I got I could hear music coming from inside, I pushed the door open more and said his name but with the music playing as loud as it was I knew he probably couldn’t hear me.  The site that I seen next was not what I was expecting, this garage was full of workout equipment, but what shocked me even more was seeing Cade on his back and his ex-girlfriend Belle straddling his lap while on the bench press seat.  Her chest exposed and Cane’s large hands covering them, her head was thrown back and Cades eyes were closed.  They were both sweaty and chasing their orgasm together, as her moans turned into screams and his grunts grew louder as she rocked her hips back and forth.  Belle must have sensed me standing there, her eyes lazily opened and she smiled at me before she leaned forward and Cade put one of her nipples in his mouth.  “Oh god Cade.”  She said while still looking at me.  He slid he hands from her breasts down her sides until he had a firm grip on her hips.  Her eyes rolled shut and Cade groaned one last time before he stilled as they both rode out their orgasms.  She leaned down and kissed him until he turned his head away. 

I sped out of his driveway, bile rising in my throat and tears burning my eyes.  I cursed myself for letting it bother me so much, we were never a couple, “You had sex one time Sydney, he’s just a smooth talker that wanted to get in your pants at his convenience.”  I said to myself and wiped my cheeks dry.  I called my dad and told him I was going to stay at my house, I didn’t want to go back there and let him see me so upset.  He tried to protest but finally relented and told me to make sure that every window was locked and to keep the doors double locked.  That night I cried, once again my own decisions had ended with me suffering the consequences.

“I don’t know what your intentions are with her but you need to let her have some space, let her come to you.  She’s my world Cade, if she wants something more between you two she’ll come to you.”  Her dad said giving me a glare.  I left the club house without her that night, pissed off and ready to beat the hell out of Ronnie when I found him.  When I got home I made myself some supper and sat down at the computer to order the parts I would need to fix her car. 

Three days later I was unpacking the parts when my cell phone rang showing it was the assisted living calling.  Thinking it was probably grandpa calling again I answered,

“What’s up gramps?”

A lady cleared her throat, Cade McAllister?”

“Yes?” 

“We need you to come in as soon as possible there’s an emergency.”  Before she could say anymore I was running out of the shop and for my motorcycle. 

In record time I was running through the doors of the building, alarms blaring because I hadn’t entered the security code.  Two nurses come running down the hall until they seen it was me, one rushed past me to silence the alarms while the other walked with me to my grandparents room. 

“Mister McAllister?”  An older gentleman asked stopping me from entering the room.

“What’s going on?”  I asked, “What’s the emergency?” 

The doctor held his hand up, “Your grandma, she…she expired in her sleep lastnight.”

All the air left my lungs, “What?”  No this couldn’t be happening. 

“And your grandpa, he’s—struggling more than usual and seems to be very confused about who he is and why he is here.”

I leaned against the wall, bent at the waist and took deep breaths trying to stop myself from throwing up.  “What the hell happened?  Did you guys fuck up her meds?  Are you not making sure his meds are right?” 

“You’re grandma was taking everything correctly, like I said she passed away her in sleep so I’m guessing her heart stopped.  We will perform an autopsy to confirm the cause of death.  Do you want to go talk to your grandpa?”

I nodded my head and stood up, “Yeah.” 

The doctor stepped pushed the door open and stepped out of the way so I could enter the room then he walked in behind me. 

“Who in the hell are you?  Get out of this room, call the god damn cops I’m being held here against my will!”  My grandpa shouted at me and threw a phone book at me. 

My heart sank, “Gramps…”

“GRAMPS?  WHO ARE YOU?”  he screamed and looked for something else to throw at me. 

Then grandpa sat down on the bed, placed his hands over his face and started to cry.  His shoulders shook as he lifted his head and looked at the empty bed that grandma had once occupied.  “That woman, was my wife, I know that much.”  I walked over and sat down beside him.  He turned his head and looked at me with tears filling his eyes, “I’m sorry, I can’t remember who you are.”

“I’m your grandson, Cade.”  I stuck my hand out for him to shake. 

He shook his head and laughed through a sob, “You get your good looks from me, you have the same green eyes as she did.”  He looked over at the empty bed.  “Last night she went to bed earlier than usual, this morning she looked like an angel sleeping across from me.” 

I stayed for most of the day, part of me was hoping that Grandpa would finally remember me, but, he never did.  Each time he asked me who I was I had to tell him again.  When he laid down on the bed he looked at me and apologized again before drifting off to sleep.  I visited with the nurses and doctors for about another hour.  We decided it would be best if grandpa stayed there so that his routine wasn’t disturbed, causing any confusion would make things harder on him.  I got back to the house and found the last known phone number for my mom.  When I called the number it had been disconnected, I had no way of telling her that her own mother had passed away and that her dad wasn’t doing very good.  I went into their bedroom and found the fireproof safe that they had told me contained their Wills and other valuable items so I could take them to the attorney.

Sydney had tried calling and texting me the following days but I couldn’t talk to her.  I didn’t want her to see how broken I was, but losing my grandma and seeing grandpa in such a bad state of mind was taking its toll on me.  To pass the time I put the parts on her car took it to her parent’s house and had another club member give me a ride back to my house.  I was sweeping the shop when my phone rang with a call from Belle.  I hadn’t talked to her since the night she left, the night that I spent with Sydney in my arms. 

“Yeah?”  I answered.

She was sobbing, “Cade, I miscarried.”

Silence filled the line, “I’m sorry.”  I didn’t know what else to say.

“I need to see you.”  She sniffled. 

I blew out a breath, I cared for her at one point in time, not like I cared about Sydney though.  Her cheating on me and actually getting pregnant had pretty much wiped away anything I had ever felt for her though. 

“Cade, are you there?” she sniffled again.

“Yeah, I uh…I’ve got some things to take care of this week, maybe next week some time.”

“Oh, okay.  Are you still with Sydney?”

I groaned with frustration, “No Belle I’m not.  I’ve gotta go.” 

“Okay, I’ll call you next week.”

“Later.”  I said and hung up. 

A text came through right after that from Sydney;

Sydney
:  Thank you

I stared at her name, I wanted to call her and tell her we needed to talk.  That for some reason I couldn’t get her out of my mind.  That I loved her.  I braced myself against the work bench, “FUCK!”  I roared with frustration.  How could I love a woman that clearly didn’t feel the same way I feel for her. 

That Thursday I went back to see my grandpa since he wasn’t going to be able to come to the service at the funeral home for grandma.  As expected he didn’t know who I was so I didn’t stay long.  The service was short, with a few of grandma’s friends in attendance that followed the hearse and me to the cemetery.  They each placed a rose on her pearl white casket before it was lowered, each squeeze of their hand on my shoulder and their words of sympathy started to make me numb. 

I was getting ready to leave when Bryan called, “Hey I need you to go with me we think Ronnie is staying in the next town over.  His construction company is named “Dig and Build” how fucking original.”

“Can you get somebody else to go?”  I asked.  I knew that if I went and actually found the piece of shit, I would kill him.  I would put a bullet between his eyes.

“Prez specifically asked for you to go with me.”

“I just got done burying my grandmother and now I have to go deal with that asshole?”

The line went silent, “Christ man, why didn’t you fucking call?”

“Been busy.”  I said.

“I’ll call Prez and let him know.  You doing okay?”

I laughed, “I’ll be fine, don’t tell Lucifer about it I’ll meet you in town.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah.”  We hung up. 

I met him at the city limit and rode beside him for thirty minutes until we pulled into the city of Franklin.  We stopped to top off our fuel tanks at a gas station. 

“This is going to be like finding a god damn needle in a hay stack.”