Rite of Passage (15 page)

“I’m sorry, Courtney.” I felt wrung out, exhausted. Maybe it was all true. Maybe it was the heat and the wine was untouched. Maybe she was burying Ellen’s ashes. But I’d always been someone who dealt in logic. And too many things were beginning to raise the hairs on the back of my neck. I opened my mouth to speak. Courtney continued her assault.

“And if you’re wondering why I was moody today, it was because I found out that my grandfather was coming tonight with my nanny. I was sad and desperate.”

“Sad and desperate?”

“Are you completely blind? That’s no mystery. Because I love you. I was terrified he’d want to take me away. I can’t stand the thought of leaving you.” She sighed and shook her head. “There it is. Does that satisfy your insatiable curiosity,
darling
?”

I sat in silence. Staring at her, every ounce of my being wanted to believe what she’d said. Her performance was perfect. She had a logical explanation for everything that had happened. Trouble is I was born a skeptic. Were her explanations too logical and too perfect?

She looked away and spurred her horse, heading down the final section of trail. We arrived at the stables, a cold, brittle silence hovering around us. Neither of us spoke over the last two miles. We dismounted and took our horses inside, putting them into their stalls.

“You go back and get cleaned up. I’ll take care of the horses,” she ordered, refusing to look at me.

“Courtney.” I stood, frozen and frustrated.

“Please, Robert, just leave it alone. Leave
me
alone.” She continued, staring at the dirt and straw. “Why can’t you understand? This is the most difficult thing I’ve ever gone through.” She closed her eyes and pressed her lips together tightly. “I should have kept my feelings a secret, but I couldn’t. I’m acting like a spoiled, selfish little girl. I know how much you care for me. But every time I look at you I hate myself for wanting you so badly, for loving you the way I do.”

I held out my hand. She took it. “You’re not alone, Courtney. I have a stake in what’s going on between us. Something incredible has happened to me since I met you. Something out of a fairy tale. “

“Yes, Robbie, of course you have a stake in our future, but I can’t look at you and see the way you look at me and not feel guilty. You had a full, rich life before we met. I’ve stolen that from you. At least that’s how I feel. How could we ever be a couple, have any life or future together when I know I’ve taken you away from everything you loved?”

“What if everything I love is here in front of me?”

She shook her head, releasing my hand and pushing it away.

“Damn it! That’s not an answer,” I said, raising my voice.

“Robbie, do you love me?” she asked.

“More than I ever thought it possible to love anyone.”

Tears streamed down her sunburned cheeks. “Then give me a little time alone, darling. I need to think,” she pleaded, forcing a smile. “I’ll see you for dinner. Promise.”

I sighed and turned, having no idea what to say. Part of me wanted to crush her in my arms and dry her tears. Another wanted to scream at her and demand the truth. As I reached the stable door she ran and caught me.

“I love you so much,” she said, as if to reassure herself.

She pulled me to her and kissed my lips, then ran back to the horses. I turned and walked away, hurt, confused, and under her spell. If she’d said the Earth was flat, I would have believed her.

Would this sad, beautiful angel ever open her heart to me completely and let me into her life? I had so many questions. With each step another piece of the dream I’d been living since Thursday evening seemed to crumble and disappear into the trail.

Chapter Twenty-One

I lay on my bed in my dirty riding clothes, glancing at the clock in the fading sunlight. Seven. I took another swallow from the bottle of beer on my night table. My dream had exploded like a land mine. But I was a pragmatist. I believed in reality. I knew better than to think that dreams really came true. I’d made my decision. Pack my bags, kiss Courtney on the cheek, and head back to Boston.

The knock was soft. I knew it was her. Courtney and I had a special intimacy—something almost telepathic. So how could I have been so wrong about so much? I sat up and headed to the door, pulling a cigarette from my pack and reaching for my lighter.

I opened the door. She stood, looking perfect and elegant again. Long beige skirt, fitted white silk blouse, with a monogrammed stock tie. A dazzling set of diamond studs matched the necklace she wore. Her dark hair shone pink in the fading sunlight, held in place by a thick white headband that matched her blouse. It struck me that Courtney’s clothing budget could probably support several small European economies.

“Hello,” she whispered. “Are you very angry with me?” She bit her lip. Her eyes shone in the twilight. I opened the door. She glanced back toward the courtyard, coming in. “Perhaps I shouldn’t.” She hesitated.

“I think it’s a little late to worry about appearances.” I sighed. “Am I angry with you? No. I’m angry with myself. Angry, exhausted, and sick of mysteries. I think it may be time to go home.”

“No!” Courtney looked up in disbelief. “You can’t.” She gasped as if someone had struck her.

I crushed out my cigarette. “I’m kind of dirty. It was hot today, and I was around horses. I recall you being there.” It was an attempt at humor. “I thought it might be easier for both of us if I gave you back your life and went to see my brother. I got a head start.” I pointed toward the beer.

“No, please, you can’t,” she repeated. “Robbie, I don’t want my life back. Not without you.” She looked startled and hurt. “Besides, you can’t leave tonight. I’m begging you. I have a special surprise.”

Her eyes looked wide—full of wonder and excitement as she closed the distance between us and took my hand. I was sweaty and half drunk. I wanted to pull away but her stare held me. “Oh, Robbie, forgive me. I’ve done this so badly, but…” She closed her eyes and shook her head. “I couldn’t have known what you’d be like.”

“Stop it, Courtney!” I raised my voice. “You’re doing it again. I have no idea what you’re talking about. I want off this roller coaster.” I began to turn, but something in her face—love, desperation, vulnerability—captured me.

“You know how much I love you?” She weaved her fingers into mine. “‘More than I ever thought it possible.’ Weren’t those your words?”

“Yes,” I whispered as I found myself reaching for her. She fell into my arms.

“Robbie, please stay. Simon and my nanny have arrived. I promise you won’t regret it,” she pleaded, her head resting on my soiled shirt. “I…I need you.” Courtney pushed away and straightened her clothing, looking defeated. She studied me, tears spilling onto her cheeks as she walked toward the door. I took her arm, turning her to face me.

“All right. I’ll give this adventure one more night.”

“I knew you would.” She looked up at me, eyes soft and inviting. “It’ll be a wonderful evening, and I promise we’ll deal with what’s happening between us. Simon’s dying to meet you.”

Could the fantasy remain alive? More importantly, should it?

“But, you really do need to freshen up, dear.” She grinned. “I’ll see you at the buffet in an hour.” She gave me a coy smile. “While the others are watching the fireworks, we’ll steal away. I want to be alone with you. There’s a lot to tell you, and we need to make plans.”

“Plans?”

“Yes, my love. I think you’ll find the evening interesting. Very interesting.”

Chapter Twenty-Two

I stood in the shower, trying to make some sense of things. As warm water washed away the residue of our magical day in the high meadows, random thoughts ran through my mind. Not all of them pleasant. She loved me. I knew that. And I loved her. Courtney wasn’t playing me—at least about her feelings. But about everything else—the newspaper clippings, the tales of witchcraft and murder, the bizarre events of the afternoon she dismissed or denied—I could only guess. And while it was possible that alcohol let my imagination play tricks, I was certain her eyes had taken on a strange glow more than once.

Yet, in spite of all my misgivings, I had no choice. Staying away from Courtney was like trying to swim the English Channel underwater. It was impossible. I dressed for the lobster buffet and headed off to meet Courtney’s guests, wondering if they were the same mysterious visitors Jonathan had anticipated.

When I entered the dining room, it was immediately obvious that the large man standing near Jonathan was Simon. My host stood captivated, fawning over the giant next to him. Uncle Jon doted on his guest like he was a movie star or sports icon. A short, round woman with a cane stood close by, smiling and nodding at the conversation.

My imaginings of Simon suggested a bear of a man. This man was tall, but his lean body held no excess weight. Broad shoulders pushed at the corners of his expensive suit, hinting at the power his six-foot, six-inch frame could unleash. Courtney was nowhere to be seen. As I studied the imposing figure commanding so much attention, a chill ran through me. The giant holding court was the man in the purple robe from my dreams. I swallowed hard and tried to maintain my composure.

I also noticed that despite the promised festivities, the crowd had dwindled. Those who remained were the family members closest to Jon and Gretchen. I noticed with interest that Wendy had joined the ensemble. She nodded and smiled warmly as I caught her eye. She looked quite fetching in a fitted black dress and gray tweed hacking jacket. As I approached, Jon saw me and quickly came over to include me.

“Here he is, Simon. Robert McGregor.” He beamed as he directed me toward the new guest. “He’s been wonderful to Courtney. They’ve become quite a pair.” He flushed, perhaps realizing the implication.

“I promised you a surprise guest,” Jon whispered to me, gloating like a child whose parents have hired a clown for his birthday party.

“So I see. Where did everyone else go?” I asked, gesturing around the room.

“Business, matters at home. Not really sure. Better this way, I think,” Jon assured me, surveying the room. “Now, I want you to meet our guests.”

“Yes, I’ve heard so much about you. I feel as if I know you already.” Simon approached, studying me, lips curling up. He offered his hand. His shake was strong and warm but non-threatening. I’d never felt a stare hold me so intensely, as if I was being probed. Simon bent his lean body and broad shoulders over my six-foot, one-inch frame. “I’m Simon Wellington, Courtney’s guardian. It’s a genuine pleasure.”

Courtney’s guardian?

The accent eluded me. It had none of the formality of his granddaughter’s. A touch of Irish, Scottish perhaps.

“Welsh,” he volunteered, suppressing a smile. “My family comes from a small hamlet in Wales.” He picked up on my curiosity over his speech.

“I see. I wasn’t sure.”

“I gathered that, Robert. We come from a village in the Southern Cambrian Mountains called Abergwesyn, A-b-e-r-g-w-e-s-y-n. My family’s lived there since before the Romans. Our main attraction today is a frightening road known as the Devil’s Switchback. The Welsh name for it is difficult enough to spell, let alone pronounce. Too many consonants and too few vowels.” He chuckled. “But we’re not here for a geography lesson. And since I’ve heard you’re a bright and perceptive young man, you’re wondering about my role as your friend’s guardian?”

Right again. When he smiled it was obvious where Courtney got her good looks. Simon had a self-assured, pleasant manner about him. His eyes seemed to penetrate while including you in his conversation, leaving the impression of confiding something private and special.

“Well, Courtney has spoken of you often. But yes, sir, I thought she had a father.”

“She’s a dear child and far too generous.” He paused. “And yes, Duncan Wellington is her father, but the poor man disappeared. He and Courtney were never close, but it’s a still a tragedy.” He put his massive hand on my shoulder and scanned the room, lowering his voice. “You see, Robert, my son Courtney was her real father. I was fortunate enough to convince a magistrate to make her my ward. At least for a while.” He chuckled softly, holding up his hands. “When she comes of age, she’ll be free to do what she chooses, heaven help us.” He rolled his eyes with amusement, releasing me. “Of course, everyone who meets Courtney knows that the real credit for the wonderful things you see in her is due to this fine woman.” He nodded toward the gray-haired woman leaning on her cane. “This is Megan McPherson, Courtney’s nanny and teacher.”

The rotund woman’s ruddy face grew red. She pushed back a wisp of thick gray hair as she held out her hand. “Mr. Phillips is far too kind, sir,” she demurred. “Miss Courtney is an angel, always has been. Beautiful, brilliant, talented.” She paused thoughtfully. “Despite...” She looked at Simon and left her thought unfinished. I caught an imperceptible nod on his part.

“Yes,” I agreed. “I’ve heard some stories. But you’re right. She’s the most wonderful girl I’ve ever met.” I flushed at having been so open.

“It’s all right, Robert.” Simon’s giant hand fell on my shoulder again. “I know how close you two have become.” He smiled. “You’re a fine young man. I couldn’t be happier.”

I wondered what to think. Was Simon encouraging our relationship? I expected reticence, even concern over the affection that had grown between Courtney and I. Especially from a proper British family. Before I had a chance for further introspection, every eye turned toward the massive oak archway.

As was the custom, Courtney’s appearance was greeted by silence and stares that anything so beautiful could be real. She smiled warmly and nodded to several of the guests. Courtney approached and stood next to me, taking my arm in hers, leaning against me. Tonight, even Jon smiled at the intimacy. I pushed her gently away. When I looked she wore a grin. Courtney was enjoying my discomfort.

“Robbie, I’m sure that my granddaughter has mentioned the special event we’re celebrating this Friday,” Simon began, eyes fixed on Courtney. “Her twenty-first birthday.”

I nodded. “She’s mentioned it.”

“Well, I’ve spoken to Jon and he’s graciously allowed us to plan a small celebration on his estate. I know you may have other commitments, but you and Courtney have grown so close, we’d consider it an honor if you’d join us.” He fixed me with a stare. “I can guarantee when the evening is over, you’ll be thrilled you stayed.”