Road to Reason (21 page)

On cloud nine, Ryan walked into Kaitlin’s front door with a week’s worth of clothing.  He was glad she had suggested he stay at her place this week. He had a lot of work to do and needed every minute of that time. 

He knew she wanted to spend time with him, and he definitely wanted to be with her, found himself missing her more and more when he went home alone at night.

This seemed to be the best compromise. Even if it only meant a few hours during dinner or lying in bed together.  It was better than nothing.  And he took comfort from being around her. 

There was something about the way she relaxed him at night, the way she ended her day.  He was glad he spent the last few days of the week at her house.  It gave him a sense of how well they clicked.

She had gone about her own routine, almost ignoring his presence in her house.  Even giving up her office for him.

She didn’t bother him, nothing other than asking if he wanted a drink or a snack.  When she was ready for bed, she walked in the office, gave him a kiss good night and told him, “Don’t work too hard. Try to get some sleep.”  Then she’d gone about her nighttime ritual. 

Hours later, when he couldn’t concentrate a minute more, he would quietly make his way to her room, get ready for bed and crawl in next to her. She almost immediately rolled toward him, hugging him close as he drifted to sleep.  He had never been so happy in his life as those few nights he spent with her last week. 

Now, looking at her in soft cotton shorts and a tiny T-shirt cooking a late dinner for him in the kitchen caused him to stop dead in his tracks.  She turned with a start. “What’s wrong?”

He set down his garment bag containing his suits and his small overnight bag.  Having spent enough time there lately he got into the habit of leaving several changes of casual clothes in her closet.  Just like she had been doing at his house. 

Walking the few steps forward, he placed his hands around her face, lowered his mouth to hers, feasting; he needed to taste her, possess her.  Fast and hurried.  Seeking and catching, twisting and turning, running his hands up and down her body.

She sensed his urgency, reached up and laced her arms around his neck, molding her body to his. He rested his hands on her sides, marveling at the feel of her skin from where her tiny shirt had lifted up.

Clasping her waist tightly, he lifted her up higher, glorying in the way her legs promptly wrapped around his waist.

On a groan he walked a few steps forward, pushing her back against the pantry door, pinning her there with his body, continuing to kiss her as if there was nothing else more on this earth he would rather do.  Her hands went to his head, holding him firmly in place, returning his kiss with equal fervor.

He unhooked her legs, pushed them to the floor despite her protests, and lowered her shorts and underwear. Then she attacked his belt, lowered his zipper and wrapped her hands around the hard length of him. 

A speed he never knew before took over.  Lifting her up again, urging her legs around his waist, he positioned himself and entered her fast, bracing her against the wall. 

He clung on tight, with one hand under her backside, the other palm flat against the pantry door, his hips moved in fast short strokes, increasing to a higher level by the bite of her nails on his shoulders through his shirt and jacket.

When he felt her start to convulse, he moved his mouth from her neck to her collarbone, sinking his teeth in.  She stiffened and then screamed, releasing all the tension from her body, pulsing around him, squeezing him tight.

Hurriedly, he pulled back from the wall, placing both his hands under her backside and walked her quickly toward her room.  Pushing his way through the door and over to the bed, he gently lowered her on the edge of the bed, her legs still wrapped tight around his waist.

Still fully embedded in her, he unlocked her legs from behind him, then held them tight around her ankles, and stood up.  Straightening her legs, he spread them wide in a V and looked down. The sight of himself deep inside of her, her spread wide for the taking pushed the intensity up another degree.

Moving his hips slowly, he pulled all the way out, slamming back in fast. Again and again, slow and then fast.  He looked up and saw her eyes meet his, then drift down below, watching his movement within her. 

He had to touch more of her, loved her breasts, wanted to feel them filling his hands, but he would have to let go of her legs. Not happening.  “Lift your shirt and your bra,” he ordered her.

She teased him wickedly, knew how much he loved that part of her anatomy, and inched her shirt up slowly. Baring her stomach, then her ribs, finally up over her breasts.  Her hands went to the center of her bra, released the clasp, spreading it open like a slow strip tease—letting him see every part of her.  “Touch yourself,” his voice croaked out, sounding rough.

Drinking in the sight of her hands covering her breasts, his hips shifted into overdrive. Recognizing his determination, her hands made their way down her body, touching the most secret part of her. 

Faster his hips moved in and out of her as her back bowed off the bed. Her inner muscles clamped down tight, she moaned low in her throat. He let out a harsh shout of his own, collapsed down on top her, and pulled her close, his breath coming in short heavy pants.

“Could you move a little?” she asked a few minutes later.

“Sorry, didn’t mean to squish you.”

“You aren’t.  But your zipper is a bit rough,” she said.

“Oh.” He leaned back, started to fasten his pants, then changed his mind. “I’m going to take a quick shower.”

She stood up. “I’ll join you. Suddenly I feel very dirty.”

He threw his head back, laughed and picked her up, carrying her into the shower.

***

“So what was that all about?” Kaitlin asked after she placed a salad on the table. 

She had suggested they eat at the table and talk, rather than the bar stools against the island in the kitchen. Explaining that this way they could sit across from each other, instead of side by side. Ryan had agreed and it made it cozier somehow.  “What?” he asked confused.

“When you walked in earlier. You had a smile on your face, then stopped suddenly and attacked me. I’m not complaining,” she informed him, batting her eyelashes and reminding him of how she acted with the host in Manhattan.

He picked up the glass of beer she had brought him earlier and took a sip. “It was your clothes.”

She looked down. She was wearing her old shorts and faded T-shirt again, after he convinced her she looked fine when she tried to put on something else. “What about them? I wear these when I’m cleaning. Don’t tell me they turned you on.”

“It’s not that.” He shook his head.  “Well, maybe they do. But actually, it’s that you had those clothes on the time we agreed I would be your first lover.”

“You remembered that?” she said, looking at him in disbelief.

“Of course I did. I have a great memory.” He took a bite of the grilled chicken on his plate.  “This is really good. I appreciate the home-cooked meal after a long day.”

She ignored his comment and went back to her clothes. “So if this outfit turned you on so much, why didn’t you make a move that night after we agreed we were dating? And why
did
you change your mind? You never did tell me,” she said, slanting her head curiously.

His lip quirked a bit. “First off, I said no that night because it just wasn’t the right time. You weren’t ready, even though you said you were.” 

He took another bite of food, another sip of beer. “As to why I changed my mind to begin with. That’s easy. That night you showed up with Alec at the bar, and Ben interrupted that guy hitting on you, I knew right then it had to be me.”  He laughed tenderly at her shocked face. 

“I don’t understand. Why did it have to be you?”

Reaching across the table, he picked her hand up and held it in his. “Because you deserved better than a one-night stand.  And you deserved someone who would be gentle with you.  I knew I could be.”

She smiled right back at him, gave his hand a squeeze before pulling it out of his grasp to take a sip of her wine. “Then why did you wait so long?”

He wiped his mouth with the napkin, set it on his plate and pushed it away. Placing his elbows on the table, he clasped his hands.  “I waited for your family’s approval.”  He watched to see her reaction.  It was time she knew the whole truth. He wasn’t alarmed by her frown, but was taken back by her words.

“If I had known that, I would have told them earlier,” she said, looking slightly miffed.

The laugh escaped his lips before he could stop it.  How could he not love her?  He did love her, so much, but he was terrified of saying it.  He didn’t want to be the one to say it first. Actually, he had never said it to anyone other than his parents.

“I don’t understand,” Kaitlin started to say. “They had to assume after a month that we had already been sleeping together.  So was that really your reason?”

He shook his head, clearing his thoughts of love. Now wasn’t the time to tell her.  “I’m sure they assumed it. But it wasn’t for them, or for me.  Or what anyone thought. It was for you.”

She snorted. “If it was for me you wouldn’t have waited that long.  I recall asking you plenty of times before that weekend.”

“I didn’t want to muddy the waters,” he started to explain. “If your family didn’t approve, and there was a good chance of that, I didn’t want you to have regrets.  I didn’t want your first time to be associated with turmoil.  Your family means as much to you as mine does to me.”             

She looked to be processing everything he said. Then she stood up, walked around the table, sat in his lap, wrapped her arms around his neck and placed her head on his shoulder.  “Thank you.” He rubbed her back, hugged her a bit closer.  “I still think you waited too long, but I appreciate your consideration.”

He choked out a laugh. “It all worked out in the end.”

“Yes it did,” she agreed with him.

Hours later, he had finally gotten around to telling her why he was so happy earlier when he showed up at her house.  Layla had agreed to testify. He could have forced it, he knew, but he couldn’t do that to her.  He felt he had enough evidence now, but this was the nail in the coffin so to speak.  This was the person that could come in and pull at the heartstrings of the jurors. 

The next morning he woke up hours earlier than normal, kissed Kaitlin goodbye and made his way to the train station to meet with Layla in Manhattan.  With any luck he would be home by late afternoon, and everything would work out just fine with the Fremont case.

“Hello, Layla,” Ryan answered the phone, concern in his voice. She was due to come in by train tomorrow after her shift and be ready for the grand jury on Friday.  It was the last day, and they were due to deliberate after Layla’s testimony.  He was afraid that her calling him on Wednesday could mean she was getting cold feet.  He hoped not. The fact that she had not only hidden her pregnancy from Jason, but also his child for the last ten years was a huge push in their favor.

“I’m sorry to bother you, Ryan.” Her voice cracked on the other end. “I have a problem.”

“What’s the problem? Maybe I can help.” He hoped he could. He would find a way to do it. He couldn’t risk her not showing up, not this late in the game, on the very last day.

“I don’t have a babysitter for Abby on Thursday night,” she started to explain. “She was supposed to stay with my friends, but they had an emergency and I don’t have any place for her to go for the night.  Is it okay if I just come in on Friday morning?”

And have her change her mind last minute? No way. That was why he wanted her there the night before. Plus that would give them time to prepare, so he could calm her and walk her through what to expect.  “Bring her with you. I’ll have another ticket available for you.”

“But where will she stay when I’m in court? I don’t want her there,” she said, her voice breaking, the nervousness coming through.

“I’ll get Kaitlin to stay with her.” He thought he could. No, he knew she would help. “Will that work? Are you comfortable with that?”

There was a pause on the other end as Ryan held his breath hoping Layla wasn’t backing out. “Yes, that should work. But, Ryan,” she hedged, “I told Abby about her father and the situation last night.  I felt she needed to know what was going on.”

“That’s good, Layla.  How is she handling it?” he asked gently.

“Not good.  She always asked who her father was and never understood why I didn’t tell her. I think she had these high hopes he could come to her one day, be this wonderful guy. It breaks my heart I had to tell her the truth.”

Her struggle not to cry was coming through loud and clear over the phone, but he had to stay firm, had to stay positive. “I know it’s hard, Layla. But I think you did the right thing.”

Layla sniffled a bit.  “I think so, too.  The first thing Abby did when I told her was give me a hug.  Then she cried and said she was glad I got away.  Can you imagine a ten-year-old saying that?”

Ryan smiled grimly. “No. But she sounds like a tough kid.  And a smart one. Just like her mom.”

***

“Hi, Abby,” Kaitlin said, holding out her hand. “I’m Kaitlin.  Why don’t you come downstairs with me while Ryan shows your mom around the guest suite?” 

Ryan had decided it was better to have Layla and Abby stay at his house. They would have more privacy here than a hotel, and Kaitlin could stay with Abby at the house during the trial. Maybe take her out on the boat and distract her, let her play on the beach for a bit.

Kaitlin watched Abby’s wide eyes taking in the sight of Ryan’s house.  She bet Abby had never seen anything like it since she had only lived in a small apartment in Brooklyn.  It had to be completely overwhelming for her,
and
Layla.

“I appreciate you letting us stay here, Ryan,” Layla stated, then looked around the house as nervous as Abby was. Ryan had picked them both up at the train station after work, then drove them to his house immediately. Kaitlin had arrived an hour prior and had dinner ready for them.   Now she knew Ryan wanted some time with Layla to prepare her, so she would entertain Abby.

“What do you say we go down by the water, Abby?”

Abby looked at her mom, saw Layla’s nod, then nodded her head at Kaitlin. “Can you fish here?” Abby asked shyly.

Kaitlin gulped and fought back a shudder. She hated fish. Hated fishing, and every part of it. Gross slimy beady-eyed creatures. She didn’t even know if Ryan had fishing equipment at the house. He probably did; he had everything else. “I’m not much of a fisherman. But you know what? If you and your mother don’t mind, I know just the place to take you fishing.” Kaitlin’s father would have a ball teaching Abby how to fish, something he never could get Kaitlin to try.

***

The next afternoon Kaitlin drove Abby back to Albany to await her mother, and their train ride back home.

It had been a good day for her and Abby.  They had taken Ryan’s boat out on the water, played on the beach, even stopped by to see Beth and Zoe at one point.

Kaitlin was able to get her baby fix with Evan while Zoe entertained Abby on her jungle gym.  Then the two girls played in the water and built sandcastles together.  All in all, it was a great day.

Kaitlin needed the distraction just as much, too. She knew how hard Ryan had worked on this case.  Knew how much it meant to him.  He told her last night the prosecution was just trying to put reasonable doubt into the juror’s eyes, trying to get that trial.

But Ryan wanted the jurors to see that Jason wasn’t the first class citizen everyone believed him to be, that it wasn’t about having a jealous girlfriend who was upset about his affair.  It was about a man in power preying on the weak and using their vulnerabilities against them. Ryan needed to prove Jason was the guilty party.

That Jason was the one who would be standing trial if he were alive today.  A man, who had used and manipulated women, then abused them when they didn’t do his bidding.  Brittany was only protecting her daughter and then herself when Jason turned his anger at being caught with Alyssa toward her.

Jason was the one who pointed the gun first at Alyssa. Then when Alyssa dropped to the floor in fear, Brittany charged him and they wrestled for the gun.  The marks on Brittany’s face from Jason’s fists would surely get the jury’s sympathy, not to mention the bruising all over Alyssa’s body.

Kaitlin knew the details, more than she wanted to know, but she had been a patient sounding board for Ryan while he prepared for his closing statements these last few days.  She only hoped he did enough. She knew if she were presented with this information she wouldn’t even be able to consider the possibility of this being anything other than self-defense.

At four o’clock Kaitlin parked her car and led Abby toward the courthouse.  Ryan had texted her, said they were done, but didn’t say anything else. 

Her heart was racing in her chest while they waited on the courthouse steps.  She had prepared for the worst, then told herself to stay positive. If it didn’t go Ryan’s way, she would be supportive. She would help him get through it, through the long rough hours this case would take on him if it went to trial.

Then suddenly, there he was with Layla and Brittany next to his side, followed by his father. All four of them had wide smiles on their faces. Kaitlin threw her hand in front of her mouth and rushed forward. Ryan reached out, caught her by the waist, and hugged her close.  “By one vote. No trial. Grand Jury ruled in our favor.  It was ruled self-defense, Brittany is free to go live her life.”

“I’m so proud of you, Ryan. So happy for you.” She turned to Layla and gave her a quick hug. “I’m sorry you had to be brought into this.  But so glad it worked out.”

Layla stepped back and brought Abby in close, then wrapped her arm around her daughter’s shoulders. “I am, too.  The news is going to get out that Jason has a child.  He has family. I’m sure they are going to be contacting us, or trying to.”

“Layla, you have my number,” Ryan reminded her. “Call me if that happens. Or if you need anything at all, or have any questions.”

“I will. I promise.”  She turned to her daughter. “You ready to go home, Abby?”

Abby, who hadn’t really spoken much in the last twenty-four hours, shyly looked at her mother. “Yes.” Then she turned to Kaitlin. “Thank you. I had a lot of fun today.”

Kaitlin reached out a hand, laying it on Abby’s shoulder.  “You’re welcome. I had a lot of fun today, too.  Maybe I’ll see you again the next time I’m in Manhattan.”

“I’d like that,” Abby said, then pulled her mother’s hand into hers.  Together they made their way to Ryan’s car so he could bring them back to the train station.