Road to Reason (19 page)

In the end, Kaitlin had asked if she could relay the information to Ryan, and promised not to if Layla had told her no. But Layla agreed the information could be shared. 

Before Layla hung up, she told Kaitlin she needed just a bit more time but appreciated having someone to talk it through with. Then Layla promised to call Kaitlin back within a week with her answer, if not sooner.  Ryan was holding out hope that Layla would come through.

In the meantime, he had to get ready for work. And put some other plans in motion. Plans that included making Kaitlin realize that this wasn’t a temporary relationship at all. 

“Taking notes?”

Kaitlin jumped at the whispered words in her ear.  The sad part was, she was taking notes. Except she didn’t want Ryan to know that.

They were waiting for Mac and Beth’s ceremony to begin. Guests had been arriving and finding their seats for the outdoor wedding for the last twenty minutes. 

Everything was beautiful at the resort spa on Lake George.  The weather was perfect for an outdoor wedding, and the reception would follow inside with wonderful sprawling views of the lake.   She would have been lying if she told Ryan she wasn’t taking notes of her soundings and the venue.  Everything was just perfect so far.  “Hmm,” she replied back with a smile.

She was happy to see him smiling at her. It had been almost three weeks since he brought marriage up to her. Almost three weeks since she laughed and called him silly. She had hoped she hadn’t insulted him, she hadn’t meant to. But by now she realized she was the one that was silly for thinking he was upset. 

He had done nothing but spend the last three weeks romancing her, taking her to dinners, sending her flowers, surprising her at work.  Showing her how much she meant to him.  She appreciated his effort, even went to some effort of her own by surprising him at work a few times.

He seemed to appreciate the surprises at night the best of all. Or maybe it was the lingerie she had purchased. 

Either way, she knew their relationship had taken a turn for the better in the last few weeks. But she was holding back. She didn’t know where he stood and she wasn’t about to show her cards first.

She looked over at Ryan, her eyes warming at how handsome he was sitting next to her. 

Again her mind drifted back to weeks ago when he brought up marriage, her breath had caught in her throat. She didn’t know how to react and took the safe route. She had pretended he was joking. At least she thought he was joking.

In all honesty, he’d just thrown it out like it was a suggestion for a date.  How was she supposed to take that?  So she’d pulled her emotions in and told him not to be silly. 

First off, a pregnancy scare really wasn’t a reason to get married. Second of all, he didn’t ask her. And third, the most important reason, he didn’t love her.  She would never marry anyone who didn’t love her.  

She wasn’t about to say those three little words first, not at all.  But in the last week she realized she had fallen love with him.  And it scared her. Terrified her, to be exact.

She’d told herself not to fall in love with him. He wasn’t the commitment type. He didn’t want long term.   He didn’t want a family.

Yet, when he thought she was pregnant he didn’t hesitate to do the right thing. Again,
she
didn’t feel it was the right thing. At least not his way.  But he didn’t hesitate.

On top of that, the last few weeks she had actually felt loved by him.  Not just in his actions, because she wasn’t stupid, he was turning it up a notch. Doing all the things a man does to get a woman.  But he had her.  So the only thing she could think of was he was getting more serious.

If only he would talk to her about it though.  Actions were great, but in this case, she wanted the words. 

Again, she wasn’t saying them first. So until then, her lips were sealed.  She remembered how he was, knew he was a short-term type of guy.  Just because they had been dating almost four months—which had to be a record for him—didn’t mean he was ready for any type of commitment. 

The last thing she wanted to do was scare him away by telling him how she felt. 

***

Lucas felt the tap on his shoulder, then heard Kaitlin whispering, “Want me to take him out and feed him?”

Grateful for the offer, he replied, “That would be great. Thanks.” He handed Michael to her and then reached in the diaper bag for the bottle and handed that off as well when Kaitlin rose. She quickly slipped into the shade away from the ceremony. 

He hadn’t wanted to miss a minute of Mac’s vows, but Michael needed to be fed and wasn’t happy sitting on his father’s lap in the sun. And Brooke, who was standing on the altar next to Mac as the Best Man, had been glancing his way nervously.

Lucas thought it was a riot that his wife was the Best Man for her brother’s wedding. But it made sense actually, as the Maid of Honor was Beth’s boss, Mitchell. 

Since this was Beth and Mac’s second wedding, they decided to have a little fun with it.  The first wedding was early in the spring at the courthouse just days before their son, Evan, was born, with Lucas and Brooke standing in as witnesses. Mac wanted to give Beth the wedding of her dreams. But not until after they were legally married before Evan was born.

Right now in front of him, Brooke, looking lovely in a peach-colored dress, stood next to her brother holding Evan. Mitchell was wearing a black tux with a peach bow tie and cummerbund. He stood next to Beth, who was wearing the biggest ball gown Lucas had ever seen.  She looked radiant.  Next to Mitchell was Zoe, in a peach dress holding her mother’s hand. 

When the judge started to speak the vows, Brooke handed Evan off to Beth to hold, while Mac picked Zoe up in his arms and they exchanged their vows as a family. There wasn’t a dry eye in the place.

***

Ben had watched Kaitlin walk out of the ceremony holding Michael.  He saw her eyes soften while she cooed at the baby, trying to tickle his belly to distract him until she could find a shady spot to feed him. 

Once he saw Kaitlin seated, cradling Michael and gazing at him while he ate, he turned his attention to Ryan, who was watching the exchanging of the vows in front of him. 

But Ben hadn’t missed the way Ryan’s face softened when Kaitlin held Michael before she made her way out of the aisle. 

***

“We need to talk.”

Ryan looked up at Ben’s serious expression.  He couldn’t for the life of him figure out what Ben’s problem was
this
time.  All of Kaitlin’s brothers had been fine for months now.  Aside from a bit of ribbing here and there, nothing. 

Now all of a sudden Ben looked like he wanted to throttle him.  First he looked for Kaitlin, saw she was sitting with Lucas and Brooke, then made his way out on the terrace with Ben. “What do we need to talk about?”

“Step up or step back,” Ben demanded of him.

“What?” Ryan asked, perturbed. “What are you talking about?”

Ben turned his head toward Kaitlin through the terrace doors, where she was holding Michael again, playing with him. “I mean step up or let her go.  Don’t play with her.  You’ve had your fun, now it’s time to take the next step or let her go so she can find it with someone else.”

A deep red haze flashed in front of Ryan’s eyes. “You don’t know anything about it.”

“I know enough. I know you aren’t a long-term type of person and I know she is. I know what she wants more than anything in this world is a husband and family.  If you aren’t going to step up, then step back. Let her move on with her life before it’s too late and you end up hurting her.”

Ryan looked over at Kaitlin, saw her with Michael, and his heart swelled.  That could be his child someday.  “How do you know I haven’t stepped up already?”

Ben stopped and looked at Ryan more thoughtfully. Then shook his head. “You haven’t.  I would know.”

“Yeah,” Ryan said bitterly. “And how is that? How would you know?”

Ben ignored the question.  “I know my sister.  I don’t want her hurt.  And the longer you’re together, the harder it will be for her if you aren’t looking for anything more than a good time.”

“Maybe I’m ready to step up and she isn’t?” he countered.

Ben laughed. “Yeah, right. That will be the day.” But when Ben stopped laughing he seemed to notice how serious Ryan’s face had become. “I don’t believe it.  No way you are more invested in this relationship than her.”

“Why is that? Because of my track record? Which, by the way, is no better than yours. And at least better than hers,” Ryan said.

“Excuse me? Are you saying my sister is…is…loose?” Ben stuttered and took a glaring step forward.

“Get real. What is wrong with you?” Ryan demanded, not backing down.  “I meant that your sister hasn’t had any long-term relationships, either.  How is her track record any different than mine?  This is the longest relationship we’ve both had.”

“Doesn’t matter,” Ben said stubbornly. “She still is looking for a future, and always has been. You haven’t.”

“You don’t know that.” They weren’t getting anywhere and Ryan was getting tired of the third degree.  No one had a right to judge him on this.

“If you want me to believe you’re serious about Kaitlin then you need to prove it to me.  I’m your only hope of helping you with her.”

“I don’t have to prove anything to you, or your family. I only have to prove it to Kaitlin. And Kaitlin only,” Ryan said bluntly. “Besides, who says I need any help?”

“You wouldn’t have said you were more invested than her if you didn’t,” Ben said with a tilt of his head and a rise of his eyes.

He was getting sick of all the questions from Ben. It was none of his business.  He’d had enough. Except, Ben’s statement hit a little too close to home. He didn’t know what possessed him. Didn’t know why he was even having this conversation, but for some unforeseen reason he wanted to prove to Ben he was serious about Kaitlin.  “I asked her to marry me.”

That got Ben’s attention…fast. “What!” he exclaimed.  “I don’t see a ring. Did she tell you no?” he said, smirking, obviously finding a lot of humor in the fact that Kaitlin might have turned him down.

Ryan didn’t think it was so funny, though. “No, she didn’t tell me no.” Which was the truth. She never said no.

“Then what did she say? Because I don’t believe any of this,” Ben said, crossing his arms in front of his massive chest. “You actually asked Kaitlin to marry you?”

Ryan frowned then realized suddenly how he
actually
phrased it, not in a question to Kaitlin. “I didn’t technically
ask
her.”

“You
told
her that she was going to marry you,” Ben said, laughing now. “That’s priceless.  I bet she laughed right back at you.” Ben shook his head. “I thought you knew how to handle the ladies.”

“I didn’t tell her. It was more of a suggestion.” Ryan shook his head. He wasn’t going into details with Ben. Ben didn’t need to know the situation around that night. 

“But you aren’t denying she laughed at you?” Ben added with a grin, reading more between the lines than Ryan was comfortable with.

Ryan scowled. Ben was actually bent over laughing at this point.  “I never thought when I made that bet with you it would be my sister that was going to bring you to your knees.”  He slapped Ryan on the back. “Good luck with that.  Looks like you lost your finesse, along with the bet.”  Then he walked back into the reception and left Ryan looking out over the water.

***

An hour later Ben caught up with Kaitlin on the same terrace. She had just stepped out alone, most likely to get a breath a fresh air like him. “So what’s going on with Ryan?” he asked out of the blue.

She turned, a look of alarm on her face. “What does that mean?”

“I mean, what is going on with you two? It’s been a few months now. A record for him. And mostly likely for you too. I’ve never known you to date anyone this long either,” he pointed out. Actually, it hadn’t occurred to him until Ryan had brought it up.

“We are just having fun,” she said simply.

He didn’t believe her. “Is that all it is? Fun?”

“Why can’t it be just that?”

“Because I know you better than anyone else. I know the goals you had for yourself.  So can you really tell me that’s all you are looking for, fun?”

She sighed and looked out at the water. “No. I want more. But I don’t know what he wants. And I’m not sure how to bring it up.  I don’t want to ruin what we’ve got.”

Ben was feeling charitable at the moment, only because he loved his sister. “Are you so sure it would ruin things if you did bring it up?”

She shrugged. “I don’t know. But I don’t want to take that chance.”

He lightly placed his hand on her chin, turning her head toward his. “You love him, don’t you?” he asked in all seriousness.

She blushed. “Yeah. I do.”

“If he is the one you want, then you go for it.” He hugged her close and gave her a brotherly kiss on the cheek. “But Kaitlin, make him work for it.  You deserve someone who is willing to go the extra mile for you.” 

He wasn’t feeling so charitable anymore now that she said she was in love with Ryan.  If he was going to lose his baby sister to Ryan Mathews, he was going to watch Ryan sweat a bit more for it.