Authors: Promised to Me
Robin Lee Hatcher (22 page)
K
arola stared at Jakob, trying not to show her surprise. And as she looked at him, she realized this was not the same man who rode away in anger and desperation. Something had changed in his heart. She felt her terror begin to dissipate, and when he bowed his head, squeezing her hands as he did so, she felt calm replace the fear.
“Father”—Jakob’s voice was barely audible above the falling rain—“I don’t begin to understand the reason things happen, but I know I’ve given everything I own to you. I gave it all up and I promised to trust you with it. So if this is a test, I’m asking you help me pass it.”
Help me, too, Jesus.
“We don’t know where our son is, Lord. If he’s run off because I was too hard on him, help me find him so I can ask his forgiveness. Keep him safe. Don’t let any harm come near him.”
Joy at hearing her husband praying such words warred with the fear she felt for their son.
O, Jesus, do not require Bernard of us.
“Now I’m asking for a clear head, God, and for wisdom each step of the way. You’re our only hope, of that I’m sure. Amen.”
“Amen.”
Jakob released one of her hands and placed his free hand on the side of her face. “I’m sorry for the things I said to you before I left. I’m sorry for the way I behaved. Forgive me?”
Nodding, she swallowed the lump in her throat.
“After we find Bernard, we’ll talk more about it.”
Again she nodded.
“Don’t be afraid.”
She shook her head. How could she be afraid after seeing this change in Jakob? Whatever had happened, she thought it a miracle. And if she could see one miracle, why not expect two?
“Now I—” He stopped as Lance rode into the yard.
Their friend looked at the two of them, standing in the rain. “I don’t know why, but I had the strongest feelin’ I needed to get over here.”
“It’s Bernard,” Jakob said. “We can’t find him. He’s not in the house.”
“What do you want from me?”
Jakob was silent for a moment, then said, “We’ll hitch up the carriage for Karola so she can take the girls into town and get more help. It’ll be dark all too soon, and this rain doesn’t look like it’s going to let up.”
“Nein!”
Both men looked at her.
“Jakob, I must go with you. He is my son, too. I must look for him. I could not bear the waiting.”
“All right, Karola.” Jakob gave her a slight smile of encouragement before turning toward Lance. “You take the girls to the Mason place first. I know Geraldine will be glad to look out for them while Bradley rides into town to form a search party. Tell folks we’ll get bells to ringing when he’s found.” He rubbed his chin. “When you’re done at the Mason farm, Lance, you go check up the mountain. He might’ve headed for the cabin. Karola and I’ll look for him to the west of here.”
“Jakob,” Karola said. “We must take dry blankets for when we find him.”
“You’re right. I’ll get some extra slickers and wrap a couple of blankets in them. Lance can take one with him and we’ll take the other.”
Karola was about to turn toward the house when Jakob suddenly pulled her into his embrace. With his mouth near her ear, he said, “I love you, Karola.”
“We will find him, Jakob. I know we will find him.” She kissed his cheek. “I love you, too.”
The darkness of night was fast approaching, made earlier than normal by the black clouds that wept upon the earth without ceasing. Jakob wouldn’t have believed, when this day started, that he would be praying for it
not
to rain before the day ended. But that’s exactly what he was praying as he and Karola continued their search.
“Bernard!”
“Bernard!”
Clad in rain slickers, they rode through fields on opposite sides of the road, each of them carrying a lantern.
“Bernard!”
“Bernard!”
God, he’s so little. Keep him safe. Make him answer us if he’s within hearing. Don’t let him be too afraid of his own father to answer.
“Bernard!”
“Bernard!”
Show me where he is, Lord. I don’t know how far he could’ve gotten by now. He could be anywhere. O Father, keep my son safe.
What if they were looking in the wrong place? What if Bernard had gone to the irrigation canal? What if he’d fallen in? He couldn’t swim, and although the water wasn’t running at full capacity, it was still too deep—and too swift—for a little boy to stand up in. What if—
“Bernard!” Karola called, her voice muffled by the rain.
Jakob glanced in her direction. He saw the glow of her lantern, bobbing in the darkness like a firefly on a summer’s night.
A light in the darkness. Like Christ is a light unto my path.
He felt the encroaching fear retreat. “Bernard! We’re here. Answer us, buddy.”
As if finishing his thought, he heard Karola call, “Bernard, we love you. Bernard!”
Jakob felt the strongest urge to abandon the road and ride south. It seemed a thought without reason. There was nothing in that direction. No farmhouses. No shelter. No tree-lined creeks. Just barren, rolling, unplowed land. Surely, if Bernard was running away, he would follow the main road.
But the feeling wouldn’t leave him. Well, he’d asked God to guide him, hadn’t he? He heeded the impulse.
“Karola! This way.” He waited until he saw her lantern coming toward him, then he turned south.
Jakob rode slowly, holding his lantern high, switching it from his right arm to left and back again. Twice more, he felt something— or Someone—sending them in a new direction, and both times he obeyed.
Jakob and Karola called Bernard’s name over and over, and he prayed their voices wouldn’t go hoarse before their son was found. His bones ached, and his skin was cold and damp. He knew Karola must feel the same. But they pressed on, because Bernard would be just as tired, cold, and damp as they were. And he would be frightened, too.
Karola’s horse stumbled. She pitched forward, and the saddle pommel gouged her in the belly. She let out a tiny gasp of pain, nearly dropping her lantern as she tried to steady herself. It was almost more than she could do to maintain her grip on the lantern’s handle.
“Karola?” Jakob’s call came from off to her right. “You all right?”
“I am fine, Jakob, but I must dismount. Do not wait for me. I will find you.”
Even as she spoke, she saw his light coming toward her. Shortly, he and his horse became a darker shadow against the black of night until at last she could see him in the glow of his own lantern.
Karola half slid, half dropped to the ground. Only her hold on the saddle kept her legs from buckling beneath her.
“I’m sorry,” Jakob said as he drew to a halt nearby. “I should have had us rest.”
“There is no time to rest.” Despite herself, a sob escaped her throat. “Oh, Jakob. I should have known where he was. If I had been watching him—”
“Don’t.” He was beside her in an instant, taking her into his arms. “Don’t blame yourself. You can’t watch a child every moment of every hour. It isn’t possible.”
Karola pressed her face against the wet slicker that covered Jakob’s chest. “Where is he? O God, where is he? How shall we find him? Help us. Please help us.”
As Karola lifted her head to look into Jakob’s face, the rain stopped. It was as if someone simply turned off a spigot. With the cessation of rain came silence—and the strength to go on. They had to keep searching. She was about to say so to Jakob when she heard something—a soft sound that didn’t quite belong in the quiet of the night.
“What was that?” She turned her head, listening. “Did you hear it?”
“Yes.” Jakob released her, then lifted his lantern high as he stepped away from her. “Bernard!”
Karola held her breath.
“Bernard!” Jakob called again.
And then came the sweetest sound Karola had ever heard.
“ Da?”
“It’s us, buddy. Your ma and me. Talk to us. Can you see the lights? We’ve got lanterns. Can you see them?”
“No.” The reply was more sob than word. “I … I fell in a … in a hole. I can’t … I can’t … see nothin’.”
“We’re coming, son. Don’t be scared. We’re real close now. Just keep talking.”
Karola followed Jakob, although his longer strides were quickly outdistancing her. “Are you hurt, Bernard?”
“I–I’m cold, Mama.”
Karola saw Jakob’s lantern swing wildly, stop, and then drop right out of view. “Jakob!”
“I’ve got him, Karola. I’ve got him. He’s all right. Thank God, he’s all right.”
It was three in the morning, and there they stood, the two of them, in Bernard’s bedroom doorway, watching him sleep. The search parties had been notified; their friends and neighbors had returned to their own beds, happy that all had turned out well.
“He’s something, isn’t he?” Jakob stared, wondering, as he wrapped his arm around his wife’s shoulders.
“Ja.”
“Imagine, thinking he could help me pay for a new barn.”
It was a story the people in this valley would tell for years.
Do you remember,
folks would say,
when Bernard Hirsch was five and he burned down the barn because he was playing with matches? Well, after his da got all upset and punished him, he heard his folks arguing about what it was going to cost to put up a new one. That was the year of the bad drought, remember? Andevery farmer hereabouts was afraid their crops were gonna fail.
Bernard, he figured he’d better do something, being it was his fault about the barn and all, so he took his favorite toys, some wooden soldiers, and started off for town to sell them to his uncle Tulley. You see, Tulley Gaffney had once said to Bernard how great those toy soldiers were and would Bernard like to sell them to him. Tulley was joshing, of course, the way grown-ups sometimes do with kids. Those toys really weren’t worth anything much. But Bernard didn’t understand that, as young as he was.
So off he went to raise money for his father. And what should happen next? It started raining cats and dogs, like it hadn’t rained most of the summer. Torrents of water. Bernard, he tried to head for cover under some trees. But then he saw what he thought was a wolf or a bear—who knows what it really was?—and he got scared and ran in the opposite direction. Straight away from the road, wouldn’t you know. And then he fell into some old hole. Nobody knew who dug it or why it was there, but it was deep enough to trap the kid, especially with everything turning to mud from the downpour.
People say it was a miracle anybody found him before he plum died of exposure. Yep, sure enough. A miracle, pure and simple.
Yes, Jakob thought. A miracle, pure and simple.
He glanced toward Karola, standing within the circle of his arm. She continued to watch Bernard, her gaze tender and full of love.
Here was another miracle. God, in his mercy, had reached across an ocean to bring Karola—who had been promised to Jakob so long ago—back into his life, a life that had been lived without hope.
Later he would tell her all the Lord had revealed after stopping him on the way to town. He would share how he’d surrendered the last of himself to God, and then the Lord had filled him to the brim with hope.
He tightened his arm around her shoulders. She lifted her gaze to meet his, and he accepted the invitation in those beautiful eyes, leaning down to kiss her.
Yes, later they would have many things to tell one another. But for now, it was enough they were exactly where God wanted them to be.
Together—and trusting in him.
20 October 1908
Shadow Creek, Idaho
Dear Father and Mother,
I find it hard to believe October is more than half gone. I have neglected writing to you, and my only excuse is how busy a place a farm is in autumn. I thought I had grown accustomed to being a farmer’s wife and to all the work that goes with it, but I had not experienced threshing season before.
The harvesting of the wheat is a community event. The farmers move from one farm to another with their plow horses and equipment, working from dawn unto dusk. The air thrums with the low, rhythmic sounds of the engines, the hiss of steam, the clanking of chains and wheels. There is a beautiful sense of completion when one sees the ripe wheat flowing out of the threshing machine.
Not that I had many opportunities to stand and watch. When the threshers are present, a farm wife does little but cook and serve meals to hungry men. Hot cakes and sausages, sandwiches, cookies and cakes, chops and steaks, boiled potatoes and fried potatoes.
I had help from one unexpected source. Charlotte White came every day while the men were threshing our fields. I know she did it mostly so she could see Lance Bishop, but I appreciated it all the same. I must admit, I had a great deal of doubt about this young woman. I did not think her worthy of Lance’s affections. But I believe God may be working a miracle in her young heart. There may even be hope that she will become a capable farmer’s wife, given a little time and some instruction. After all, he was able to work the same miracle in me, so anything is possible.
Our new barn is up, and it is the pride and joy of the Hirsch family, from youngest to oldest. Lucky, our orphaned kitten, who is not so small as she once was, has decided it is a marvelous place to play, although she is unwilling to remain out there at night. She insists on sleeping on the foot of our bed. Jakob still protests that cats do not belong in the house, but I think he would miss her if she was not there. He tries to pretend he does not have a soft spot in his heart for Lucky. He does not fool me.
The nights have grown cold now. There is frost on the ground in the mornings. Jakob predicts we will see the first snow flurries before the month is out. With the harvest over, he is able to spend more time with me and the children. We all love that. I am especially blessed when he sits with me each evening to read God’s Word aloud and to share those things God is teaching him. I am humbled as I watch my husband growing strong in his faith.
What a wondrous thing it is to know God loves us as he finds us, but that he is changing us, from glory to glory, to be more like his Son!
Father and Mother, I know there were times you despaired for me. But for some reason, despite all my faults, God chose to bless me with a husband I both love and respect and with three beautiful children whom I adore.
Now I must tell you something wonderful. God has granted me another blessing. In the spring, as the new seedlings burst from the tilled soil of our fields, there will be new life in the Hirsch home as well.
I was unsure how Jakob would take the news of another baby, knowing that it was in childbirth he lost Siobhan. But when I told him, he smiled and repeated something Laura Gaffney told me some time back, a verse of Scripture I did not expect Jakob to know. “As arrows are in the hand of a mighty man; so are children of the youth. Happy is the man that hath his quiver full of them.”
I believe Jakob will have a new daughter, and when she is born, we will name her Hope.
With all my love,
Karola
