Roommating (Preston's Mill #1) (7 page)

Not that he was going to admit that to anyone anytime soon.

Or ever.

Looking down, he saw that she was finally taking care of
business. Kicking her back paws behind her as she finished, she gave a little
hop and turned back toward the building. “Good girl,” he said and then wanted
to roll his eyes.

Damn dog.

They were back in the apartment, and Chris hung her leash
back up and locked the door. He was finally starting to relax. Maybe a little
late night TV would help, but he knew if he got comfortable on Flo that he
wouldn’t make it to bed. He had a television in his room, but it wasn’t quite
the same as sitting on Flo.

Mentally, he began a running list of all the things that
would need to be addressed in the morning with all the crews. There were going
to be calls to make and decisions to be made on how long he could afford to be
away from the sites. Tomorrow was a given. There was no way he was going to
send Heather to the hospital alone. Even though it was routine surgery, and Dr.
Mallins assured them Tom would come home the following day, it still wasn’t
right to make her go alone.

He’d call Jenny and see about getting a housekeeper or home
health person to stay with Tom for a couple of days and…

“Hey.”

Chris shook his head to clear it when he heard Heather’s
soft voice. She was standing in the doorway to her bedroom wearing a pair of
flannel boxers and a tank top. Her hair was loose, and she didn’t have on a
stitch of makeup. She looked young and sweet and…scared. He walked closer.

“How are you doing? You going to be able to sleep?”

She shrugged. “Physically, I think I will, but my brain
won’t quite shut down yet.”

He nodded. “I know the feeling. I was just standing there
thinking of the calls I’ll need to make in the morning and all the things we’ll
need to handle to keep things going at work.”

“Me too. There’s so much going on at the office with the new
software and converting the files. I can spare a day or two—especially for Dad—but
I know it will stress him out more that I’m not at work. We’ll have to ask at
the hospital about referrals for a home health aide or something.”

He chuckled.

“What?” she asked.

“I was just thinking the same exact thing,” he said with a
lopsided grin. Then he yawned. Loudly.

“Great minds,” she said softly. Then she surprised him by
reaching out and touching his arm. “Thank you.”

He looked at her curiously. “For what?”

“For being there. For me and Dad. I…I don’t know what I
would have done without you.”

Reaching up, he caressed her cheek. “You would have been
fine. You’re stronger than you think.”

She smiled. “Still, I’m really glad you were there with me.”

They stood there like that for a long minute—her hand on his
arm, his caressing her cheek. He marveled at how soft her skin was and how
small she looked. Delicate.

“Heather,” he murmured, his head leaning toward hers as if
an invisible chord was pulling him that way.

Her lips parted as she moved a little closer.

She smelled good. A light, florally scent hit him as he
carefully wrapped his other arm around her waist, effectively closing the
distance between them. And then he did what he’d been aching to do since the
first day she walked through the apartment door.

He kissed her.

The kiss started gently, his lips
lightly brushing against hers, as if he were testing to see how it felt.

When a surge of excitement and pleasure rose inside her, she
made a little noise in her throat and raised her hand to the back of his neck.
Chris immediately deepened the kiss, slipping his tongue into her mouth.

She’d experienced plenty of good kisses in her life, but
this was on a whole different level. Her head spun and her body pulsed and a
deep need inside her sprang to life—one she’d never known she possessed.

Chris seemed to sense her response because his body was
tightening and his hands were becoming more possessive. He slid them down her
back, and one of them lowered to cup her bottom, pressing her more snugly
against him. She clenched one of her hands in his shirt and held on, kissing
him as eagerly as he was her.

When she felt a sharp tug of arousal, it was followed by a cold
sliver of fear.

What the hell was she doing? Yes, he’d been great today, but
she usually didn’t even really like Chris. She absolutely shouldn’t be kissing
him this way, no matter how much her body and her heart clearly wanted it.

She broke her mouth away and gasped, “Wait. Chris, wait.”

He froze for a moment, and then he released her with a low
groan.

Heather took a quick step back. “What are we doing?” She
wiped a hand against her mouth, as if that might somehow clear the aftermath of
that amazing kiss from her mind. “What are we doing?”

“Kissing.” His voice was slightly rough—as if he were
affected by their embrace too—but he sounded more controlled than she felt. He
took a step closer, his eyes hot with obvious interest. “And I wouldn’t mind
doing it again.”

She could barely resist that look in his eyes, but the
anxiety coursing through her was enough to prompt her to raise her hand to stop
his approach. “I don’t think we should.”

He let out a breath. “Why not? It was good.”

“Yes. It was good. But that doesn’t mean it’s a good idea.”

“Why not?”

“Because we’re both—not ourselves this evening.”

She was trying desperately to be reasonable and smart, but
the sight of him standing in front of her, big and handsome and bristly from a
day’s worth of beard, looking at her like he wanted to swallow her whole, was
almost more than she could handle. In about five seconds, she was going to be
back in his arms, giving herself to him completely.

“I think we’re ourselves,” Chris said slowly.

“Well, I’m not. I’ve got to…” What she had to do—right now,
as quickly as she could—was get away from him. “I’ve got to….go to bed. We can
talk in the morning.”

She whirled around and hurried into her room, closing the
door behind her.

She leaned against it, breathing deeply. Yes, that had been
a cowardly retreat, but her only other choice would be to surrender to her
highly inappropriate feelings.

She probably would have had sex with him, if he’d continued
deepening the embrace. She wasn’t sure she would have had the will or brains to
stop them, since it was becoming clear that she wanted it so much.

That would have been a huge mistake.

At least she’d saved herself from
that
.

She jumped at a knock on her door, right behind her.

“Heather?” Chris’s voice was low, still hoarse.

“Sorry,” she said through the door, praying that he would
listen to her, not keep pushing on this. “I’m really sorry, but we need to talk
in the morning. I’m…I’m not myself, and I don’t want to do something I’ll
regret.”

“Heather?” he repeated.

“I…I really think it’s for the best.”

Silence.

Maybe he was finally going away.

“Look…can you just open the door? Just for a second?”

She groaned, knowing if she opened the door and looked at
him again that there was a good chance she’d fling herself back into his arms. “Can’t
we just—”

“Heather.” This time her name was a near growl.

With a sigh of defeat, she opened the door just a couple of
inches. But before she could even look at him, his hand shot through the
opening—with Lucy on it. Her tongue was lolling and her tail was wagging, and
she looked excited to be part of this ridiculous situation.

Oh. So he hadn’t wanted to talk to or kiss her again. She
reached up and took Lucy—careful to not touch Chris’s hand.

She cleared her throat but couldn’t seem to make herself say
anything.

There was a longish pause. Then, “Okay. Talk to you
tomorrow.”

“Thank you,” she called, relieved and now wanting him even
more. A lot of guys would have been pushy, just ignoring her wishes and
demanding to be let in. “Good night.”

When she heard him retreating and then the muffled sound of
his bedroom door closing, she let out a long sigh and walked over to slump onto
her bed. What a mess. She’d been needy and vulnerable, and she’d let down her
guard far too much.

Chris wasn’t a bad guy. Now that she’d gotten to know him
again, he was a lot better than she’d been thinking. He was fine for this
roommating thing and even for being a business partner with, for as long as he
wanted to stick around.

But he wasn’t a committer. She’d learned that the hard way a
few years ago.

She needed stability. She was at the point in her life when
she was looking toward the future, toward building a good life for herself. And
the most stupid thing she could do was fall for a guy who wasn’t going to be around
for the long-haul.

She’d just been upset about her father tonight. That was all
that had happened. People sometimes kissed someone they didn’t intend to, and
it wasn’t the end of the world.

That was all that had happened tonight.

She really hoped her dad was okay.

Her phone rang just then, as if her thoughts had conjured
the sound. She gasped when she saw the caller was her father.

“Dad!” she said, after scrambling to connect the call.
“You’re supposed to be sleeping.”

“I was,” he replied, sounding weak but still with his
characteristic dry intelligence. “But they keep coming in checking on me every
other minute, and I kept worrying about you.”

“Why are you worried about me?” she asked, her voice
breaking slightly. “You’re the one in the hospital. You’re the one having
surgery tomorrow.”

“I’m okay.”

“No, you’re not. Are you in a lot of pain?”

“Nah. They’ve doped me up pretty good. How are you holding
up, Heather?”

“I’m fine. Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Well, I did have some vague thoughts about you there by yourself,
falling apart.”

She sniffed and smiled. “I’m not falling apart.”

“Is Chris with you?”

“He’s in the apartment,” she said slowly. “He lives here.”

“I know that. I mean, is he helping you out? You need to
have someone with you.”

“I’m fine, Dad. I really am. Chris is helping out. We’re
going to cover everything at work while you’re in the hospital, and I’ll be
there first thing tomorrow so I can see you before you go into surgery.”

“Okay. Good. Sorry about all of this.”

She almost choked. “Don’t be ridiculous! You can’t apologize
for health problems, Dad.”

“I’m your dad. I can do what I want.”

She started to laugh, but it turned into a little sob before
she knew what was happening. It was a moment before she could say coherently,
“Yes, you can. You’re going to be just fine. Now get some sleep so you’re ready
for tomorrow.”

“So Chris is there?”

She felt weird that her father was taking comfort in that,
but she also didn’t want to take that comfort away. “Yes, he’s here. I’m doing
fine.”

“Good. Good. You need someone.” His voice was fainter, like
he was getting tired.

“Goodnight, Dad,” she said softly. “I’ll see you in the
morning.”

When she’d hung up, she stared at the phone for a minute
before she finally put it down.

Her dad was right about one thing. She did need someone. The
idea of his dying—sometime in the future, hopefully in the very far off
future—was like a huge dark void, threatening to consume her.

She would have no real family then—no family that acted like
family, anyway.

She’d always kind of assumed she’d be married with her own
family by the time her father died. He’d been a healthy man all his life, so
she was hoping he’d have a good long life. But today had really scared her.

What if she ended up completely alone when he died?

The thought was terrifying—so scary she couldn’t let herself
dwell on it. Her father was okay. He wasn’t going to die any time soon. She had
time. Plenty of time.

But she definitely couldn’t let herself wander down a
dead-end road with a guy who would never commit to her and give her what she
needed.

Chris was hot. No question about that. And he was funny and
smart and could be surprisingly kind. But he ran away when life get hard, and
that just didn’t work for her.

She’d been needy tonight, so she’d kissed him, but she
absolutely couldn’t let it go any further than that.

No more kissing. No more soft thoughts about him.

They were roommates and business partners. And they could be
friendly.

But absolutely nothing else.

***

Heather didn’t sleep very well.

After a couple of hours of tossing in bed, worrying about
everything, she finally took a couple of antihistamines that always knocked her
out. She went to sleep after that, but she woke up when her alarm went off,
groggy and fuzzy-headed.

She rolled out of bed and had to stand for a minute to fight
off a wave of dizziness.

Too much had happened yesterday. She couldn’t process it
all. And today her dad was going to have surgery.

It was just six in the morning, but she wanted to get over
to the hospital early, so she could sit with her dad for a little while before
they took him into pre-op.

She went to the bathroom and then was about to head to the
kitchen for coffee when she caught a glimpse of herself in the mirror. She was
still wearing the tank and boxers she’d slept in, and they left a lot of her
body uncovered.

If Chris wasn’t up now, he would be soon. She grabbed for a
robe to pull on over her pajamas so she’d be more covered up if she saw him.

After last night, she needed to be a lot more careful.

She was pouring herself a cup of coffee when Chris’s bedroom
door opened. Like her, he headed first for the bathroom, so she just caught a
glimpse of a broad, bare chest and a pair of black sweat pants before the door
closed.

She was leaning against the counter, sipping her coffee when
he came out of the bathroom and headed toward her in the kitchen. While she was
tempted to try to avoid him this morning, she wasn’t going to do that.

The mature, reasonable thing to do was have a conversation
this morning about the kiss, so that was what she was going to do.

“Morning,” he said, his voice slightly rough from sleep.
Very sexy. So was the sight of his strong, masculine chest and broad shoulders.

“Good morning,” she said with a little smile.

“Hear anything from your dad?” He leaned over briefly to
greet Lucy, who had run up to him excitedly.

“He called last night. He sounded okay. They had him on pain
medicine, so he was comfortable enough. Hopefully, the procedure today will go
smoothly, and he’ll be on his way to recovery.”

“Yeah.” Chris nodded as he filled his mug and brought it to
his lips. “Good.”

She recognized that his eyes were on her face, watching her
discreetly. He was wondering about the kiss, about her reaction to it. She felt
her cheeks warming as she remembered how eager and passionate she’d been after
the slightest touch of his lips.

Better to get it over with right away, so things could go
back to normal between them.

“About last night,” she began, her voice cracking slightly
because she was nervous about bringing it up.

Chris turned his head to meet her eyes. “Yeah?”

“I was…really scared about my dad, so I was needy and…and I
made a mistake.”

He narrowed his eyes slightly. “I’m the one who kissed you.”

“I know. But I kissed you back, and I shouldn’t have. I was
really needy.” She’d already said that. She hated sounding so incoherent, but
she wished Chris would stop looking at her like that, like he was trying to
read her mind. “It was a good kiss,” she began.

“Yeah. I know it was.” His eyes flared up briefly, as if he
was remembering exactly how good it was.

That wasn’t what she wanted to talk about. Or remember. She
cleared her throat. “So obviously there’s some…some attraction between us. But
we can’t act on it.”

“Why not?”

“Because…” She didn’t want to tell him that she knew he
would never commit to her. It might hurt his feelings, and she didn’t want to
do that. She also vaguely knew that normal girls weren’t even thinking about
commitment at this point, and she didn’t want him to think she was even more
high maintenance and uptight than he already did. In a flurry of confusion and
anxiety, she managed to say, “Because it’s not what I want. I only kiss guys
that I want relationships with, and that’s…that’s never going to work with
you.”

There. That was the truth. It wasn’t the whole truth, but it
was as much as she could give him.

Chris might want to kiss her again. He might want to do much
more. But he wasn’t going to want a serious relationship with her, so just the
hint of it should scare him off pretty effectively.

“Oh,” he said, after blinking once. “Right. Of course.”

She let out a breath. “I don’t want things to get weird
between us, since we have to work together and live together for five more
months. So, so are we okay?”

His expression cleared. “Yeah. Of course, we are. No more
kissing.”