Rowena Through the Wall: Expanded Edition (23 page)

We sat in chilly silence.

"Maybe we should go back through the wall," she said.

"We can't yet. They won't let me go anywhere. Besides, they know how to find me over there. And I don't want to endanger anyone else." I sighed. "No, I think we have to see this through. Something is going to happen soon. I feel it in my bones."

We replaced the capes in the trunk for safe storage until the winter months. Donning my old dress, I gathered my new gowns and Kendra followed suit. We took them to her room to sort. In all, we each came out with five new day dresses and we split the gowns by size. Two for her and three for me.

"It's only right that I get more," I said, grinning, "because I wreck so many."

Kendra attempted a smile, but her face was full of worry.

Something
did
happen soon.

The following morning, I woke up and was sick to my stomach. Thankfully, I made it to the chamber pot in time.

"What's wrong?" Sargon said, rushing to my side. "Are you ill? What should I do?"

"Get Kendra," I begged, stretching out on the cool floor.

Within minutes, Kendra was bending over me, offering words of encouragement. "I've sent him away. Is this what I think it is?"

I groaned and nodded.

She winced. "Are you sure?"

"I've known since the birds came back. No birds and bees for a barren people."

"Oh my God." She dropped to the floor and sat beside me. "That's why the birds came back. You're pregnant and that breaks the curse. Does this mean it's a girl?"

"I don't know for certain."

Kendra put her head on her knees. "This complicates things."

That was an understatement.

"Any idea who the father is, Row?"

I gave her a wry look.

"Okay," she said, "let's not go there right now."

"I don't want to go anywhere but back to bed," I grumbled.

As she helped me to the bed, she said, "We should tell him."

"Who?"

"Sargon. Your husband."

"No." I moaned and collapsed onto the bed.

"We should," Kendra insisted. "He'll leave you alone then."

"Having sex doesn't harm the baby. You know that."

"But
he
doesn't know that. I can tell him you have to be careful for a while and he'll believe it. He won't want to take a chance, believe me."

I massaged my throbbing head. "Okay. I won't be able to hide it for long anyway. But there's going to be a circus."

I could imagine the reaction here, at Huel and at Norland.

Damn them all.

"Are you happy at all about this, Row?"

I sighed. "I'm not sure. Maybe. If it's not Sargon's. I always wanted to have kids, but I don't want to give birth to a…" I couldn't finish the word. Wolf.

Kendra hugged me. "Any child of yours will be beautiful and loving, just like you are. And I'm going to be right along with you through all of it. I promise."

I started to sniff.

She headed for the door. "I'll go tell him now."

A half hour later, Sargon entered the room, his face beaming with happiness. "You're with child?"

I nodded.

He moved to the bed, took my hand and kissed it. "My beautiful wife. Thank you."

I sobbed a little then. Damn hormones.

"Kendra says we must be careful these first few weeks," Sargon told me. "I will keep you and the babe safe. You mustn't ride your horse."

Right now the thought of bouncing up and down on Lightning made my stomach churn.

"Take all the time you need in bed. We've a feast tonight, remember." He kissed me on the forehead. "I'll be back at dusk to dress." To Kendra, he said, "Stay with her. Take care of her. Don't let her want for anything."

But I
did
want for something. Or someone.

At the door, he turned. "Wear the Tintegal broach, Rowena. Keep it on you at all times from now on. I need you safe."

When we were alone, Kendra said, "You should feel better soon. I remember when my mom had morning sickness. She was usually okay by noon."

Maybe noon in nine months time, I thought, miserable.

Of course, word got around the castle without delay. All day people smirked at me and stared at my stomach. You would almost think Sargon had rented a biplane and had a message towed across the sky, proclaiming, "Red knocked up." Or "Bun in the oven." Or some such thing.

Logan looked as though he'd masterminded the whole thing. He was tickled pink at the prospect of becoming an uncle.

And
Thane was particularly sweet. I was to call on him for anything, anytime. Definitely godfather material there―and not the mafia kind. Sadly, I thought about how much better a father he would make than Sargon.

My own kin was less effusive. Richard went red
and wished me well. Grandfather worried and scratched his chin, as he so often did. I tried to tell him I was okay with it all, but he knew the odds as well as I did. His own mother had died in childbirth.

Kendra kept me going those next few days. She protected me from too much nosiness and made sure I ate and slept. We spent some happy times in the kitchen with George and Ralph, the dog. George spoiled me with special preserves and treats.

The following day, Avery the groom trotted into the kitchen. He car
ried a parcel―the chess set I had ordered from the woodcarver.

I clapped my hands in delight. "Thank you." Taking the parcel, I hurried to the library to set up my treasure.

Thane was reading by the window.

He smiled when he saw me.

I was always a little b
reathless when I saw Thane. With that black curly hair and compact build, he looked so like his older brother that it confused me. Except for his eyes, which were kind and put me at ease.

"What is that you have?" he asked.

"It's a chess set," I said, grinning with pride. "For Sargon. It's a game of strategy with kings, queens and knights. In my world, it is the king of games, for the most intelligent. I had it made for him as a gift."

Thane picked up a queen. "How do you play?"

"I'll teach you," I said.

I explained the different pieces and how they moved about the board. Thane was a quick learner, really keen. Before long, we were playing our first game. I won, of course.

"This is a grand game," he said. "A wonderful gift."

"Do you think Sargon will like it?"

Thane frowned. "He'll like the strategy of it. And the beauty of the pieces. I'm not sure he'll have the patience to play." He paused. "Please don't be disappointed if he doesn't take the time to learn it."

"I thought as much," I said, my smile disappearing.

I was sad for the loss of my innocence. I had ordered the chess set in the early days, when pleasing Sargon was important to me. Now I hoped merely to survive the next month under his authority.

"Let's play again," I said. "I get to go first since I won."

We played in silence for several moves.

My last move was tricky and I bent over the board for some time before moving the piece. When I looked up, Thane was gazing at me with sorrow in his eyes.

"Rowena, are you happy with Sargon?"

He frowned when he saw my shock.

"I expected as much," he said. "I'm trying to word this in such a way that it doesn't sound disloyal." He moved a knight. "Has he been violent to you?"

It took about ten seconds to make up my mind. Thane was a kind man and it would be so good to have someone else know. Someone close to the king. Someone who could perhaps help.

I could answer him without saying a word. Then I could deny I ever told him. I brushed my hair back and pulled down the shoulder of my dress.

Thane flinched and I heard his sharp intake of breath.

"I'm so sorry." His fist clenched and unclenched.

I adjusted my dress, then looked at the chess game and made my next move. "Check."

He sighed. "It's yours again. Thank you for the game."

I started to line up the pieces for next time.

"I don't know what to do," he said. "I want to reassure you that I can help, but I don't know how to do it. I must think."

"Thane, I am grateful that you know and care. I expect―for the time being―I will be safe. Sargon won't risk hurting the child I carry."

"But you're afraid."

I could imagine the struggle he felt. "Very."

He took my hand. "These are restless times. Things ar
e happening in our world that will result in change, I'm sure. Which way? I don't know. It could go badly for us. But there is hope in change, don't you think? Will you hope with me?"

I smiled, nodding. I had a friend in this kind man, who thought before he acted. Just as well he didn't know my feelings for him.

"Tell me about the world you come from," he said. "I've been curious."

This surprised and delighted me. No one else had shown the slightest interest in the fact that I had led a life before coming to Land's End.

"The land itself is very similar, except the sun is more yellow and the sky a lighter blue. We are much more advanced in several fields. We don't use horses anymore, except for sport." I explained our transportation, computers, cell phones and televisions.

Thane's eyes grew wide with amazement.

"Our medicine is much more advanced. We have ways to cure or prevent many diseases. And women don't die in childbirth like they do here."

"Your field is medicine," he said. "Is that a common thing for women?"

"In our world, women have equal rights to men and are educated to the same standard. I am considered a doctor of veterinary medicine." I let my pride show. "It has taken me several years to accomplish."

"To be so educated…" He shook his head. "It must be hard for you here."

He was the first one who had ever considered what it must be like for me, being far from home.

I let out a tired sigh. "It is sometimes. I'm used to complete freedom of my movements and actions. And I miss intellectual pursuits like this one. You are very perceptive to think of that." I paused. "But I have family here. And Kendra and I can't leave Grandfather right now. It is so hard for him, with Ivan gone. If I were to leave too…"

He gazed at me in a way that warmed me all over.

My gaze drifted to the window. "You talk of war coming here. One way in which we have progressed at home―but maybe not really―is warfare. We have tremendous weapons of mass destruction. Not to mention the ability to annihilate entire populations in minutes
. It is terrifying."

"Then perhaps our world is not so bad after all."

I stared at him. "Maybe not."

We sat in silence for a moment.

"Could you take me there one day?" he asked.

"What?"

"I'd like to see your world. Could you take me through the portal? For a short time, maybe next time you visit."

I was floored. "Yes, I'd like to do that."

His smile was heart-stopping. I had to leave.

With a hurried excuse, I dashed out the door and down the corridor.

Later that day I learned that my new saddle was complete. I went to the stables, secured the saddle to Lightning and sat on her for a while. The saddle was finely crafted. I couldn't wait until the morning sickness was over so I could test it out.

I'd get around Sargon's claustrophobic control somehow.

Maybe it wouldn't be necessary by then.

Chapter 26

In the morning, I discovered Thane in the library, as I'd expected. I sat down beside him and he smiled.

My heart thudded wildly.

It was my turn to be brave. "Thane, I have a favor to ask. I want to go home to my world for a short time today and I'd like you to accompany me."

I had his attention now.

"You know I'm pregnant. Well, there are things I want from home that I can't get here. With all the warriors coming for the tournament, I'll need someone to watch my back while riding to the portal. Will you take me through and escort me back? I can't go alone. Even I wouldn't try that."

I could see the inner war reflected in his expression. Between the desire to see the world I had talked of and the disapproval that Sargon would extend if he found out, he was conflicted.

Yet, there was excitement in his eyes.

"How far?" he said.

"About two hours to the portal. Then I'd need an hour there. Five hours total." I watched him closely. "Just you and me. I wouldn't bring Kendra this time. As few people as possible should know the exact location of the portal."