Ruined (The Seraphim Series Book 1) (13 page)

“I'm not here on Cure business,” she told him. “I'm here on my own business.”

“And why is Lilliah your business?” he asked, leaning forward, his eyes hard.

“You know as well as I do that her bloodline could save this earth or ruin it. We can't let her get into the wrong hands. The effects could be catastrophic.”

“You don't think I can protect her? Is that it?”

“Until a moment ago, I thought you were the wrong hands.” She smiled slowly, sitting up a little straighter. “But now I’m not sure.”

“So you came here to save her?” He laughed, shaking his head disbelievingly, downing the rest of his drink. “You’re powerful. But not that powerful.”

“I didn’t come here looking for a fight,” she quickly assured him. “I came to try and appeal to your more human nature. I came here for help.”

“I don't have a human nature. I think people are forgetting that I’m
not
human.”

“Even so, Earth has been your home for so long. Even you must have some reservations about it being destroyed?” Her raised eyebrows let him know she wanted an answer.

“Earth is nothing,” he dismissed. His face was devoid of all emotions, but his eyes were blazing. “Besides, your earth has been around for four and a half billion years,” he told her. “What makes you think the end is now? Why do you need my help?”

“The dark powers are getting stronger. Something is coming, and I don’t know what it is. I just know that it has something to do with that girl. People are disappearing, Azrael.” Her voice wavered slightly. “Members of The Cure are disappearing.”

“That girl’s name is Lilliah,” he said sternly, then after a moment, “What do you mean
disappearing
?”

“Just that. All of them are just vanishing into thin air. I can find anyone, Azrael, dead or alive, but for some reason, I can’t find
them
.”

“Fine.” He sighed. “I’ll look into it for you.” He would never let Ada know, but his curiosity was piqued.

“It’s all very recent,” she added. “It must revolve around the girl. It has to.”

“Once again, her name is Lilliah, and I’ve already told you she's safe.” Azrael seethed. He was getting tired of people doubting Lilliah’s safety when she was with him. This was the safest place for her to be.

“How can she be?” Ada demanded, standing. “As long as she is without her powers she is a liability. And with a demon so close by?” she asked, referring to Sebastian. “Now with the disappearances? She needs to protect herself!”

“Demon, huh? So it seems The Cure knows more than I thought,” he said, almost thinking out loud.

“The girl needs her powers,” Ada tried again, refusing to be deterred.

“No,” he shot back.

“Why? She could be taken any moment. She needs to protect herself. You can't keep her locked away forever,” she tried to explain.

“You know as well as I do that the spell is too dangerous. The memories are too deep in her mind. You could do more damage than good.” His features were hard before they slightly softened, a cocky smirk returning. “Besides, you should be paying more attention to your own problems. Your time is coming to an end.”

“Yes,” she said, not looking at him anymore. Instead, she ran her hands over her creased dress before slowly sitting again. Azrael knew all the ways of The Cure; he had been there when the rules had been drafted. Ada Washington might be the high priestess now, but soon she would pass on and another would take her place, and her power.

“Who's it going to be?” Azrael had seen too many priests and priestesses come and go; he'd got bored with the whole takeover. It really was just a ceremony to him.

“Well, it was supposed to be Benedict,” she told him, her eyes narrowing, much to Azrael’s delight. “But now that it's no longer an option, we're still deliberating.”

“Benedict can make his own decisions. Why don't you ask him?” Azrael challenged.

“I might,” Ada said with false bravado. She knew what his answer would be.

“Maybe you won’t ask him because you know what he’ll say?” Azrael teased again.

“We will find another to replace me,” Ada shot back.

“I have no doubt about that. But it’s who will replace you that is the big question.” He smiled wickedly, knowing he was getting under her skin.

“Well, that’s The Cure’s business now, isn't it?” she told him sweetly.

“Touché.” He shrugged, smiling, liking how unsettled she had become.

“Bring the girl to New York. Let us open her mind,” Ada suggested, getting up from her seat. “It'll be best for everyone. She'll remember everything—who she is, her powers,” she whispered almost wishfully.

“The answer’s still
no
,” Azrael replied.

“Maybe you should ask her,” Ada suggested. “I think I’ll be seeing you soon, Azrael.”

He watched her leave the room with all the confidence he couldn’t possess, not about this anyway. Lilliah wanted to remember who she was. She wanted her powers. He knew all of that, and yet he couldn’t give them to her. The road she needed to take to regain her powers and memories was too dark, and he wasn’t sure she could make it to the other side. He wasn’t prepared to take that risk.

“Was she asking about Lilliah?” Benedict asked, walking into the room a few seconds later.

“Yes,” Azrael confirmed, standing. “And you.”

“She wants Lilliah to remember, doesn’t she?”

“She could lose everything. Every memory, every feeling. You cannot just go into someone's head and make them remember. It's not that easy,” Azrael defended.

“We'll protect her,” Benedict assured him confidently.

“She'd be in so much pain.” Azrael was well aware of the spell that needed to be performed for Lilliah to remember her past. He also knew about the great amount of pain that came with it. The spell would break down walls that had been up for so long, making her remember something that had been buried so far down in her memory.

“There will be some discomfort.”

“Discomfort?” His eyes widened. “You and I both know that the pain she will have to go through is a hell of a lot more than discomfort. I refuse to put her in that situation. We can't even be sure of what we'd be walking into. You know The Cure is unstable at the moment. I'm not putting her in that position.” Walking over to the bar, he poured himself another drink. “I feel like we're missing something.” The words were spoken quietly, but Benedict had heard them.

“What can we possibly be missing?” They had both been searching for Lilliah and Sebastian’s mother, trying to connect the dots.

“If I knew that, we wouldn’t be having this conversation,” he spat back, irritated. “What did Lilliah see the day I saved her from the car? What was the purpose of sending out Sebastian? Why use all that magic for something that's of no use to him? Hell won’t be opened for hundreds of years. Why now?” These questions had been bothering Azrael for weeks, and he'd silently pondered them for hours. And he still didn’t have any answers.

“Some members of The Cure have disappeared. Ada can't find them,” he informed his second-in-command.

“Just like we can’t find their mother?” Benedict asked with a frown.

“Exactly.” He grabbed his glass of whiskey. The uncertainty of the situation bothered him. He was the one who was always in control.

“I'll carry on looking,” Benedict suggested.

“Until we have all the answers, she won’t be put in that much danger.” His eyes squinted at Benedict over the rim of his glass.

“Of course.”

Azrael watched Benedict leave the room. His frustration built and built until he couldn’t hold it anymore; he threw his glass at the nearest wall and watched it shatter into a thousand tiny pieces. He'd promised her he'd protect her, but how could he when he didn’t know the full story? He didn’t know all the facts. Stalking over to his desk, he pulled out the papers they’d collected over the past few days—all he could find about Lilliah and Sebastian, and anything on Hell and Lucifer. It all had to mean something; Lucifer never did anything without proper reason or cause. Azrael had now made it his mission to find out what that was.

Chapter 11

“I need food,” Rebecca decided, standing. “Does anyone want anything?”

“No thanks,” Sebastian and Lilliah answered simultaneously.

“Right, don't have too much fun without me,” Rebecca called out, walking out the room.

“I hate this,” Sebastian announced after a moment of silence, falling into the chair behind him, his long legs and arms out stretched in front.

“Hate what?” Lilliah asked, her head still down as she read from a book. They were sitting in the library with books and magazine sprawled out in front of them, and empty snack and drink wrappers everywhere.

“All this waiting around.” He tipped his head back and sighed. “I feel useless. All we're doing is sitting around. What's the point?”

“Speak for yourself.” She finally looked up and pointed down to the open page on her lap. “I think I'm actually getting somewhere with this stuff.” After a few days of doing nothing, Lilliah had decided to start her own research. She started with missing persons reports from the last five years in London.

“How is that helping anyone?” Sebastian demanded.

“Well.” Lilliah closed the book. She'd been waiting for the opportunity to show off her findings. “These”—she lifted a pile of papers that were laid out next to her—“are all the missing persons reports that I think could be magically related. I'm going to look into them and see whether there's any connection to Mum’s abduction.”

“How exactly are you planning on doing that?” he challenged, looking unimpressed.

“Well, there might be links. Just because there's not a lot of evidence with Mum, doesn't mean there's no evidence with every case. We could find a few similarities with other disappearances, and find out who did that. Then boom”—she held her hands up, smiling confidently—“we've found the guys who took Mum.”

“I want to do more. I need to be out there looking for Mum.”

“You don't think I feel the same way?” she demanded, irritated.  “I want to help find her just as much as you do!”

“Then why are we just sitting in this goddamn library?” He stood up, frustrated, running his hands through his already wild hair. “Why aren't we out there looking?”

“We are looking! Just because we're not in the streets doesn't mean we're not doing anything. If it makes you feel better, get a picture of Mum and start walking the streets. Ask a load of people if they've seen her. Let's see how far that get you.”

“Now you're just being a bitch,” Sebastian replied snidely.

“And you’re being a fucking baby!” It wasn't her best response, but Sebastian was getting on her nerves. She needed to get away from him. It wasn't natural for brothers and sisters to be spending this much time with each other; it went against nature.

“Oh, yeah. Real mature, Lil.”

“I think it's funny when you guys fight.” Rebecca walked back into the room, her arms full of treats.

“It's him.” Lilliah pointed to her brother. “I was fine. He started it.”

“Okay, three-year-old Lilliah.” Rebecca laughed, dropping the food on the floor. “I hope Azrael doesn't mind me taking most of his food.”

“I doubt it. The guy has more money than sense.” Sebastian grabbed a bag of crisps from the floor.

“I know,” Rebecca laughed. “He saw me walking out the kitchen. He didn't say anything, but I could see it in his eyes. He was judging me.” Rebecca and Sebastian laughed but Lilliah didn't.

“He's back?” she pressed.

“Yeah. I saw him and Benedict walk into his office.” 

Lilliah was already standing before Rebecca had finished.

“I'll see you guys later.” Lilliah grabbed a few pieces of paper and headed for the door.

“Oh, I get it. Use us and abuse us,” Rebecca called after her.

“Let her leave,” Sebastian called out. “More food for us.”

Lilliah just laughed in reply. They'd fallen into a comfortable routine over the past few days. Azrael would be out in the mornings, and Lilliah would spend it with her brother and Rebecca. Then they'd meet in the afternoon once he returned. She was beginning to like the small sense of normality they’d developed.  

“How did it go?” Lilliah could hear Benedict ask as she walked up to Azrael’s office.

“Uneventful,” she could hear him answer. “It would appear the entire vampire population is completely unaware of what’s been happening.”

“Do you believe them?” Benedict pressed.

“They wouldn’t dare lie to me.”

Lilliah rolled her eyes. He really was too sure of himself, mostly because no one seemed to ever go against him.

“Besides, Dena hasn’t heard of anything. There isn’t anything that happens in the vampire community that she doesn’t know about.”

“That’s true. We should probably talk to . . .”

The conversation died as Lilliah rounded the corner.

“Sorry. I can come back.” She tried slowly backing away from the now silent room, a little embarrassed as both men turned to look at her.

“No, Lilliah. I’m just about to leave,” Benedict lied politely, already making his way to the door. “We’ll talk later.” He nodded to Azrael before leaving.

“I didn’t mean to just walk in,” Lilliah tried to defend. “I didn’t know it was a private conversation.”
But a closed door would have helped
, she silently added.

“It wasn’t private.” Azrael smirked. “I’ve been chasing some leads about your mother. Still nothing.” He sighed at Lilliah’s hopeful expression. “Benedict thinks we shouldn’t talk about your mother in front of you. He thinks it might be too hard for you to hear.”

“I’d guessed,” Lilliah shared, still awkwardly standing in the doorway. She’d been trying to pick Benedict’s brain on magic, vampires, and werewolves, and he’d answered a few of her questions, albeit begrudgingly. “I’ve been doing my own research, did you know?” she shared, holding up the papers in her hands.

Azrael’s head shot up in surprise. “Your own research?” he asked slowly. “On what?”

She walked up to his desk and laid out the missing persons reports in front of him.

“I think these are magically related disappearances. I was wondering whether we could look into them. They could give us some leads into finding Mum.”

Azrael sat forward, his eyes scanning the papers. “The first three are vampire attacks. The last two are werewolves.”

“Oh.” Lilliah frowned at his quickness. “So I'm right? How did you know?”

“I can just tell by the nature of the attack.” He turned to look at her, smiling slightly. “I had no idea you were doing all this.”

“Yeah, it's turned into a bit of a project for me.” She shared, “I think Seb needs one. He's slowly going crazy.”

“Crazy?” Azrael repeated.

“Yeah, like cabin fever.” She giggled.

“I hadn't realised staying in the house was so bad.”He frowned, refusing to let the conversation drop
.
“I want you to enjoy your time here, not feel like prisoners.”

“We don't. We just feel like we're sitting around here all day not doing anything while our mum is being held hostage somewhere.” As much as she fought about it with Sebastian, Lilliah really did want to do more. She wanted to be active and do something to help find her mother.

“I've been in talks with a lot of people about your mother.”

“Oh, I know you have,” she agreed quickly. She didn’t want him to think she thought he wasn’t doing anything. She knew how hard he was trying.

“We don’t think it was just the vampires that took her,” Azrael shared. “I haven’t been talking to you about this because I didn’t want to worry you. Had I known that you were doing all this,” he said, pointing to the desk, “I would have told you sooner.”

“You didn’t want me to worry?” Lilliah repeated, bewildered. “How could I not worry? That's all I’ve been doing since the day she was taken.”

“Well, yes. I see that now.”

In that moment, Lilliah realised how alone Azrael really was. He had no idea of the bonds families had, and he clearly didn’t understand the deep love they shared. But then again, how could he when he'd never had his own family?

“You really don't understand families, do you?” she voiced out loud.

“I’ve never worried about anyone,” he told her honestly, unashamed. “I’ve never had to.”

“Wow. Sounds lonely. What about when you were fighting?” Surely there must have been someone he’d cared about?

“I fought for my own gain.” He sat back, stretching his arms out. “I was too busy worrying about myself and what I wanted rather than the safety of the people I was fighting with. Angels’ relationships are very different to those of humans. There are relationships and friendships but no real, deep feelings.”

“That sounds so sad.” She watched him, his position and his stance; it all screamed power, but now all Lilliah could see was loneliness.

“When you’ve never had it, you never miss it. It was a big change when we fell. All these emotions and feelings that none of us were prepared for; it was enough to send some of us mad.”

“Ha, crazy with love?” She snickered at her silly joke.

“Something like that,” he replied, unable to stop his own laugh. “How about we go for a swim?” he asked with a glint in his eye.

“Me and you?” For a second, she was unable to process the concept of her and Azrael being in a pool together, half naked. Was she dreaming again?

“Well, I’m not going to make you swim alone, am I?” He smiled, clearly enjoying her discomfort. “I want you to have fun and smile. Not be bored and working all day. Go get your stuff. I’ll meet you in the pool.”

Lilliah walked like a zombie to the pool house, her heart banging furiously in her chest. Holding her towel tightly around her, she started second guessing her two-piece bikini. She had spent ten minutes trying different ones on, not realising she had so many in the drawer. She wanted to look sexy and grown up, but not like she was trying too hard. And she didn’t want to show too much skin; one of the bikinis had barely covered her, and she was certain it would have disintegrated when she stepped in the water. Finally, she had settled on a simple, black, halter-neck two-piece. Unlike a lot of the things in that drawer, it looked like something she would have bought for herself.

Finally rounding the corner, Lilliah's heart missed a beat when she saw Azrael swimming lengths in the Olympic-sized pool. She stood for a moment, admiring how he flew through the water, his powerful arms pushing his body as fast as any Olympic swimmer. She squinted, trying to get a better look. His back was covered in dark markings, almost like tattoos. Dark but delicate marks covered the length of his back and the tops of his arms. They were beautiful and powerful at the same time, a lot like Azrael.

He stopped at the end of the pool, pushing his hair back and away from his eyes, the water making his already dark hair that much darker. “I thought I’d have to send a search party for you,” he teased, moving to stand in the waist-high water, his perfectly chiselled abs on full display.

“Oh, dear Lord,” Lilliah muttered. Was there anything on this man that wasn’t perfect?

“What?” he asked, bringing Lilliah back to reality.

“Nothing,” she quickly replied, walking over to put her towel by the pool’s edge. “I couldn’t find any bikinis,” she easily lied. She could feel his eyes on her as she carefully walked to the water, trying not to slip. “I’m surprised whoever got all these clothes even thought of getting a bikini,” she rushed out. When she got nervous, she talked, and she was nervous.

“I told Dena to get you things for any occasion.”

Lilliah stopped when she heard Dena’s name. All the new clothes in her wardrobe suddenly didn’t look so appealing.

“Dena was the one who brought us all those clothes?” she asked, ducking her body in the water until she was neck deep. She kept a safe distance from Azrael.

“Yes,” he said, watching her face carefully. “She’s the only woman who works closely with me. I didn’t think Benedict or I would be particularly useful in picking out clothes for two teenage girls. Why does that bother you?”

“It doesn’t,” she quickly replied, already swimming away from Azrael.

She didn’t like Dena. She didn’t know why. She just didn’t. Maybe it was because she was a vampire and vampires had taken her mother?

You know that’s not why!
a little voiced taunted her from the back of her mind. It was because she knew Dena liked Azrael. She just couldn’t tell him that, so instead, she acted dumb.

“I can tell it bothers you.” She could hear Azrael laugh from behind her.

She didn’t reply and just concentrated on swimming. Then she felt a large hand grab her ankle. It started to drag her backwards.

“What the hell?” she sputtered, choking on the water. “What was that for?”

“What’s wrong?” He smirked that wicked smile that she just hated, yet loved at the same time.

“I just don't like Dena,” Lilliah shared honestly, trying not to give anything away.

“Why?” he pressed, still smirking.