Ruined (The Seraphim Series Book 1) (14 page)

“I don't know,” she lied. “I just get the creeps around her.”

“How many times have you met her?”

“I don't know, twice.” She tried to kick away, getting uncomfortable. Why wasn’t he letting this drop? What was the story behind Azrael and Dena? “I don't think she likes me any more than I like her, so we're even. How long have you two known each other?” she finally broached, trying to act vaguely interested as though she were just making conversation, when in actual fact, she was dying to hear his next words.

“About fifty years or so.”

Fifty years.
Fifty years is a long time,
Lilliah thought. It definitely classified as history, and she was definitely jealous. She wanted to know more but decided to change the subject instead. She wanted to enjoy the time she was spending with him, and not obsess about his possible ex.

“Are you a good swimmer?” she asked, kicking away from him so she was floating on her back.

“Yes.”

“Well, this might actually be the one thing I can beat you at,” she told him proudly.

“Can you now?” He smiled, slowly lowering himself into the water. “Why do you think that?”

“Because I’m an amazing swimmer. I could totally beat you if you don't use your super-fast powers.” There weren’t many things in her life that Lilliah felt this confident about, but swimming was one of them. “I was on my old school’s swim team, and I’ve never lost a race.”

“Well, I’ve never lost at anything. Come on.”

Lilliah swam slowly down the pool towards a waiting Azrael, who was already standing at the shallow end.

“What's the prize?” he asked when she got closer.

“Prize?” she repeated, confused. “Beating you is enough for me. Why, what do you want?”

“You really think you’re going to beat me, huh?” he asked smiling widely. “Okay then. Whoever loses has to cook the other person dinner.”

“Dinner?” She laughed. “You really haven’t tried my cooking, because if you had, you'd know it’s no prize.”

“Well, I’ll be the judge of that.”

“Okay, but don’t say I didn’t warn you. Just don't cheat!” Getting ready, Lilliah spied him out the corner of her eye. His eyes were straight ahead, determined, and focused.

“I won't,” he promised.

“Ready, set, go.”

They both sprang from the wall, water flying everywhere as both their arms cut through the water. She didn’t know where Azrael was, if she was ahead or losing, but she pushed as fast and as hard as she could until she felt the end with her hand and she lifted up her head. Azrael was staring down at her, looking smug.

“You beat me?” she asked disbelievingly. She’d never lost at swimming.

“Just,” he told her. “I’ve been swimming for centuries, and you nearly beat me. And I wasn’t holding back.”

“But I still lost,” she pointed out, still dismayed. “This is the first race I’ve lost.”

“Well, there’s no one here. Your secret’s safe with me.”

“The joke’s actually on you.” She smiled smugly. “Because now you’re going to have to try my cooking. I wasn’t lying when I said I can't cook.”

“I'll cook then. It’s something I really enjoy.”

“Oh, let me guess, another thing you just happen to be amazing at?” She rolled her eyes. “Is there anything you’re bad at?”

“Singing,” he answered back without a second’s hesitation.

“I can't sing either,” Lilliah shared, letting go of the side to tread water. “But I can't imagine you cooking. You don't look like the type of guy who cooks.”

“What type of man cooks?” He raised his eyebrows.

“I was about to say an older man, but I guess you can't get older than you,” she joked. “Even if you do only look twenty-eight. What else do you like doing?”

“You already know I like driving.”

She nodded, remembering their conversation in the car.

“Yeah, I remember when the first car came out. It’s the only thing that comes close to flying.”

“Did you really have wings?” she squealed, forgetting she was in the water and sinking.

“Be careful.” He scowled softly, dragging her up by her arm.

“Did you actually have wings?” she asked again, still coughing from the water. Pictures of Azrael with perfect white wings, and shirtless, filled her mind. Was there anything better?

“Yes, we all had wings. Losing them was like losing an arm or a leg. It was the strangest thing at first.”

“I can imagine.” All Lilliah could do was imagine because she didn’t remember having hers, never mind losing them. Unless she classed her falling dream as memory, which she didn’t. “What do your markings mean? On your back?” She had to physically stop herself from running her hands over them.

“They’re warrior’s markings.” He looked down to where they just peeked over his shoulder. “Back when I was up there, I was head of the army. The darker and larger the markings are, the better the warrior.”

“That’s amazing.” She was in complete awe. Even after all her reading and research, there was still so much she didn’t know about Heaven, although she wasn’t really surprised by this. “You must have been good. They’re really dark.”

“I was the best,” he said without hesitation or embarrassment.

“That was very big headed.” She laughed, splashing water at him.

“Well, it's the truth.” He shrugged. “Are you cold?”

Lilliah was freezing, but she didn’t want to get out. She liked this one-on-one time with Azrael, with no one around, when she could actually get to know him.

“No.”

“You’re lying again.” He grabbed her arm and pulled her closer. “You really are a bad liar,” he whispered once she was close.

“I’m not lying,” she whispered back, her heart doing flips in her chest. She loved him being this close, their skin touching under the water and him still holding her hand.

“I repeat. You’re a terrible liar.” He pulled her to him, crashing his lips on hers. “I’ve wanted to do that all day,” he whispered against her lips.

“Then you should have come and found me sooner.” She giggled back, locking her arms around his neck.

“I wanted to,” he shared, pulling her away from the side but still managing to keep them both above water. “But if I came to find you every time I wanted to, I’d get nothing done.”

“I wouldn’t mind.” She nodded her head seriously. “Sometimes I want to come and find you just so I can talk to you about nothing.” She looked away, a little embarrassed by her confession. “But I don’t. I know you’re busy.”

 “It seems lately everything I’ve been doing is because of you. Every action, every thought has been with you in mind.”

“Am I that much of a pain in the ass?” she asked, only half serious.

“No.” He gave her a quick squeeze. “You’re anything but a pain. You’ve given everything I do meaning.”

“What do you mean?” She entwined her fingers in the hair at the nape of his neck, basking in the feeling.

“Everything I did before you has been empty, meaningless. But now?” He pursed his lips for a moment. “Now everything I do is for you. So I know you’re safe. So I know you’re happy.”

Lilliah couldn’t speak; she didn’t have the right words, so instead of speaking, she pulled his face down to hers, pouring all her feelings into the kiss, hoping he understood.

Their relationship had been in a strange place, a place where she didn’t understand where they stood. She didn’t know whether what she was feeling was too much, and she didn’t know whether he felt the same way. Should she really be feeling this way after he had wanted to hurt her? But now, being with him here, she knew what she was feeling was right.

They stayed in the pool for a little while longer, just enjoying the water and being close to each other.

“Come on. We don't want you catching a cold,” Azrael said finally, gently pulling her to the steps.

“No,” she protested. “Let’s just stay here a little while longer.”

“You’re going to get a cold.” He scowled.

Lilliah followed him out of the pool, not sure whether she was hiding her disappointment well.

“Here.” He opened her towel and wrapped it tightly around her.

“Do you ever get ill?” She pulled the fluffy fabric up higher.

“No, never. Illness is a mortal thing.” She watched him as he wrapped a towel around his own waist, leaving his chest bared to her hungry eyes.

“Wow, that's really amazing,” she said, not really sure whether she was talking about the lack of illness or his abs.

“It’s definitely a plus. But there are downsides,” he told her, folding his arms and leaning against the wall.

“Really?” She raised her eyebrows sceptically. “Because from where I’m standing, there really doesn’t seem to be any.” Once again, she was not sure whether she was talking about his body or the lack of illness.

“Being trapped out of your home? Unable to return? I’ve been the only one of my kind for centuries, staying the same while everyone else dies.”

“Being one of a kind makes you unique,” she pointed out, an overwhelming sadness descending on her. “You must have been really lonely.”

“Looking for you kept me pretty occupied. And now you’re here and I don't feel lonely at all.”

Lilliah could actually feel her legs weakening. Why did he have to be this sweet?

“I really can’t handle you being sweet,” she told him, her cheeks flaming red.

“Really?” He laughed, pulling her into a strong hug. “You'd prefer I was still a dick to you?”

She giggled at his use of the word “dick.” It didn't sound right coming out of his mouth. “You are still a dick sometimes.” She smiled, her cheek pressed tightly against his bare chest. He smelt smoky. Breathing in deeply, she realised, no, not smoky—manly.

“I like keeping you on your toes,” he joked, and to Lilliah's dismay, pulled back. “Come on. You need to get warm and dressed.”

He walked Lilliah all the way to her room, keeping a tight hold of her hand.

“Good night.” She could feel him lean in, his lips on the top of her head.

“Sweet dreams, Lilliah,” he said into her hair before walking away down the hall.

Behind the safety of her door, Lilliah squealed like a schoolgirl, jumping on the floor and doing a silly little dance. She couldn’t contain her excitement. She could feel a shift in their relationship. It felt stronger now, like she hadn’t just dreamt it all up.

“He's really amazing.” She sighed, getting ready for the shower. How was it possible that someone so perfect actually existed? Getting into the warm shower, she couldn’t help but smile. His smile was all she could think about, as well as his perfect teeth and the gleam in his eye when he was relaxed and enjoying himself. She liked that she got to see him like that, all relaxed.

Did Dena ever see that? The thought went as quickly as it came. She didn’t want to spend her time obsessing about Dena. She could tell they had history, but she wasn’t at the house. She didn’t live here like Benedict did, which meant it didn’t matter how close they once were. They weren’t now.

Chapter 12

“Now, punch, punch, punch!” the man yelled. “Do you feel the burn? But don’t forget. Don’t stand too close. You don’t want to hurt your wrists.”

Lilliah took a step back, wiping her brow with her arm as she tried to catch her breath.

Note to self
, she thought as she grabbed her water bottle and gulped as much as she could,
being thin does not make you fit.
She hadn’t realised how out of shape she was until now. She stared down at the laptop, waiting for her online instructor to demonstrate the next move. Fighting had never been her thing; she had always been more of a stay-at-home-and-read kind of girl. But she had been attacked twice now, and she refused to be the victim anymore. She wanted to be able to defend herself. So when she decided she actually did need to learn how to fight, she did what any other eighteen-year-old girl would do: she Googled it. To her amazement, there were tons of videos that taught, step-by-step, how to defend yourself and how to attack.  She was actually getting pretty good at it too. Getting back into her position, she didn’t see Azrael walk in.

“Your stance is wrong.”

She turned her head slightly. “Why is it?” She was standing just the way the guy was in the video!

“To fight, you need balance. The way you’re standing, I could easily knock you off yours,” he explained.

She looked down at her feet before looking up at him.

“What do you mean?”

Azrael ran towards her, knocking her over, but catching her again just before she hit the ground.

“You need to keep your balance.” He smiled down at her, only inches away from her face. “If you’re fighting someone, especially if they’re bigger than you, it’s all about balance.”

“Right,” she breathed, staring up at him.

“As I said, fighting is about balance. Keep yours and knock them off theirs.” He brought her up so they were now standing next to each other.

“Okay, how do I do that?” She walked over to her laptop, stopping the video.

“Well, first off, you probably shouldn’t be learning from a guy on YouTube.” He frowned, looking past her at the frozen screen.

“It’s all I had to work from. Benedict won't help me train.”

“I asked Benedict not to train you,” Azrael shared. “If you're in trouble, I want you to run, not stand and fight.”

“I'll still fight, whether I know how to or not.”

“I see that now.” He walked up to her, grabbing her waist and turning her towards the punching bag, placing her in front of him.

“So let's train.
”
She shivered as his breath ran down her neck. He was so close she could feel the hardness of his muscles. He was like a wall behind her.

“Turn so your body is like this.” He twisted her torso. “Bring your arms up.”

She did as he said, her heart going wild in her chest. It was getting so loud she was a little worried he’d be able to hear it. Even after all the time they'd spent together, she still wasn't used to it—to him.

“Remember that the key to beating anyone is throwing them off balance. Sometimes whatever you’re fighting will have a  balance that you can’t beat, so aim for the legs first.”

She nodded as a shiver ran down her spine. “Even if it’s a vampire or a werewolf?”

“Even vampires and werewolves,” he confirmed. “They still fight like humans. They’re just faster and stronger, so knock them down as quickly as you can. It’ll give you more time to get away.” His hand slid down her thigh and tapped it lightly. “With this leg, kick the shin.”

She did as he’d said, kicking the punching bag, guessing where a shin would be.

“Do that as hard as you can.  This will give you a few seconds to run. Either punch or kick. If you kick, aim for the legs; if you punch, aim for the face or throat. It won’t stop them completely, but it’ll give you more time to escape.”

“Aim for the face,” she repeated, punching the bag.

“Harder,” he commanded. “Hit as hard as you can.”

The first punch wasn’t great, so she hit again, and again, getting better and hitting harder every time.

“That’s good.” He stepped back, folding his arms over his broad chest. “Good form.”

“I’m getting better.” She smiled proudly.

A small smile twitched his lips. “You’ve never fought.”

“No. I was more of a ballet girl.”

“No, I mean in any of your lives. You’ve never been a fighter. Not once have I ever seen you fight or hit anything.”

“Was I ever chased by vampires or werewolves in my other lives?”

He shook his head, now openly smirking at her.

“Well.” She shrugged her shoulder. “Needs must and all. I’ve never had to learn how to fight. Now I honestly think it’s a must.”

“I agree. It would be helpful if you at least knew the basics.”

She stared at him, a little shocked; she hadn’t expected him to agree so easily.

“If there is ever a moment that I can’t be there, you need to know how to defend yourself so you can get away.”

“So you’ll teach me? YouTube is great, but it really does only go so far,” she joked.

“I’ll teach you everything I know,” he vowed.

“You’ll teach me to kick ass?” She raised her eyebrow.

“No. I’ll teach you self-defence; you won’t be able to beat a vampire or a werewolf. Not as a human.”

“You never know. I could be a real Buffy.”

“What’s a Buffy?” he asked, perplexed.

“You know,
Buffy the Vampire Slayer
. She’s an awesome teenage girl who can kill demons, vampires, and stuff.”

“Right,” he drawled out sceptically.

“You’ve never heard of Buffy? Oh, my friend, you have seriously missed out. That was a great show.”

“But it was just a show. This is real life.”

“I know. But I’m not a human,” she pointed out a little smugly.

“You are an angel,” he agreed, amused by her childish behaviour. “But you haven’t got angel powers yet. Will they come in time? I don’t know.” He lifted his broad shoulders in a simple shrug. “So as far as your abilities go, you might as well be a human.”

“So humans can’t kill vampires or werewolves at all? So they’re just sitting ducks? Waiting to be killed? That’s a little unfair.” Humans really had got the harsh end of the deal.

“Well, they might be able to.” He didn’t look convinced. “I guess if the right human had a stake, and the vampire was poorly trained, then I suppose they could get the upper hand and kill them. But it’s very doubtful.”

“Stakes? Do vampires actually die from a stake to the heart?” She had presumed that this had just been fiction.

“Stakes to the heart, sunlight, and chopping their heads off also works. But the stake is the easiest.”

Just how many vampires has Azrael killed in his lifetime
? Lilliah was about to ask when another question popped in her head
.
“Can I have a stake? For just in case.”

“I don’t have stakes. I don’t need them.”

She had to stop herself from rolling her eyes. “You don’t need them because you’re so awesome?” she joked, sarcasm dripping from her words.

“Yes,” he replied, completely straight-faced. “I have many weapons all over the house. I don’t need them, but I like having them around.”

“Can I have a look?” she asked, almost jumping on the spot with excitement.

“Okay, but you can’t touch anything. Not until you’ve learnt how to properly use them.”

He’s like a parent warning a child,
she thought, following him down the hall and into another room. She hadn’t commented on the fact that he’d said, “Until you’re trained,” as if he were going to train her!

“These are just a small selection.” He held the door open.

“Wow.” She gasped, her eyes darting around the room. Every wall was covered with weapons. It looked like a torture chamber more than anything else. “This is intense.”

“The ones in here are older, but they still work.” His eyes followed Lilliah as she walked farther in. “What do you think?”

Azrael is a serious collector,
she thought, walking up to a crossbow hanging on the wall. “How old are these?”

“All the ones in here are at least three hundred years old. Probably older.” He came up beside her. “This is one of my favourites.” He smiled, indicating the crossbow. “You see the carvings in the wood? It’s a work of art.”

“It is beautiful,” she agreed. She could never have imagined a weapon made for killing to look like this. “Why do you have these, but you don’t have any stakes?” The weapons in the room were all beautiful, but she couldn’t really imagine actually using any of them. They’d be almost impossible to hide. They just weren’t practical.

“Stakes are ugly. Why would I want one hanging on my wall?” he asked, pulling a face.

“Yeah, I guess,” she agreed awkwardly. He had made her question sound stupid. “Well, could I still have one . . . maybe?”

“I’ll get you one. But I’ll have to teach you how to use it first. Otherwise, it’s useless. And they’re not easy to use.”

“I could learn how.” She nodded ecstatically, finally feeling like she was getting somewhere.

“I know you can.” He smiled down at her. “But until you learn, you’re not touching a weapon.” He motioned with his head towards the door. “Come on. I have somewhere to be.”

“Where are you going?” she asked, waiting for him to lock the door again.

“Into London. I want to pay a man a visit.”

“What man?” she pressed.

“His name’s Damon Blake. He’s a human, but he knows of the magical world. I want to question him about your mother.”

“Why do you think he knows something?” She stopped walking, the news startling her.

“He might. Damon knows a lot of things about a lot of people. He might be able to give me a name or point me in the right direction.”

“Are you and Benedict going?” They might get news about her mother soon. Excitement began to buzz in her heart.

“No. He’s staying here to do another tracking spell. We’re doing them daily now. She will show up eventually.” Sympathy flashed in his eyes. But sympathy wasn’t what Lilliah wanted. She wanted to help.

“I want to come,” she rushed out.

“To see Damon?” he clarified, looking down at her. He looked puzzled for a second.

“Yes.” She nodded her head once, gearing herself up, ready for an argument.

He turned to look down the empty hall, a slow smile creeping on his lips. “Okay, you can come. Meet me downstairs in fifteen minutes.” He looked back at her. “And you might want to change.”

Lilliah opened her mouth to argue, but then shut it when she’d actually processed what he’d said. She just stood there for a second, a little dumbfounded; she really hadn’t expected him to agree so easily.

“Fifteen minutes, Lilliah,” Azrael called over his shoulder as he walked away.

She ran to her room, kicking her shoes off as she went.

“This is it?” Lilliah asked, standing on the busy London sidewalk, looking up at the huge, glass skyscraper.

“This is where he works,” Azrael confirmed, moving to stand beside her.

“Not what I expected,” she muttered, following him into the marble reception area.

“Oh, sir,” the pretty receptionist called out as they walked past. “You need an appointment before you can enter.” Her eyes flicked over Lilliah before they settled on Azrael.

“I’m here to see Damon Blake.” Azrael stared at her, clearly unimpressed. “He’ll be expecting us.”

“Well.” She smiled again, nervously tucking a stray piece of hair behind her ear. “I don’t have Mr. Blake down for any appointments.” Her cheeks started to burn red. “But I’m sure if you have an appointment he wouldn’t . . .”

Azrael was already walking to the elevator before she could finish.

“Well, she wasn’t very good at her job,” Lilliah stated once they had both entered the elevator. “You hardly said anything to her and she just let us go up!”

“Humans are easy to manipulate.” He pressed the button in the elevator, not the least bit interested in the receptionist.

“What? Can you . . . can you like hypnotise humans or something?” She whispered the last few words as she leant closer to him. 

He bent his head so he was closer to hers. “Come closer,” he whispered.

Lilliah leant her head forward.

“No, I can’t,” he said, leaning forward and pressing a quick kiss on her lips.

“I thought you were being serious!” She laughed, shaking her head, a little embarrassed.

“It was too hard to resist.” He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her closer to him. “Sorry to disappoint you, though.” His smile was playful and light. She liked him like this.

The doors pinged open and they both walked out, Azrael’s arm still hanging over Lilliah’s shoulders.

“Do you have an appointment, sir?” an elderly woman stood to greet them.